Kitty Kurse
by Ailarii
Summary: When the Akatsuki are turned into cats and sent to our world and discovered by a total Narutard and her friend, what happens? Chaos. That is what happens my friend; especially when an Alex is involved... DeiOC and ItaOC. Rated for language and humor.
1. Chapter 1

**Me:** Ok well first things first!!! I got this idea from Inkaide's story, _Meowz! I'm and Ex Nin!_ Though mine will be _very_ different. If you read my summary then you'll know that it's different! So there! XP

Well I just know that a lot of people have written this type of fanfiction so is it so bad for me to try my hand at it as well?? I'll not only be working on this, but I'll also be working on my other ItaSaku one too! So updates will _not_ be as quick! I think you all can handle a little more of a wait, ne?

**Deidara:** Just hurry up and let them read it!

**Me:** Hmph you're just so mean!

**Deidara:** Whatever

**Me:** Hmph well just for that –takes his clay-

**Deidara:** HEY WTF?

**Me:** That's what you get for being mean!

**Deidara:** Fine, I'm sorry; now give me back my clay!

**Me:** Aww you're no fun!

**Deidara:** Crazy lady…

**Me:** What. Did. You. Just. Call. Me?

**Deidara:** Oh crap –runs for the hills-

**Me**: YEAH YOU BETTER RUN! –pulls out Zangetsu- MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

**Itachilver**: Ok well while she goes insane (Me: -in backround- YOUR COMING WITH ME!) o.o uhh well yes I am but while she does that—with me apparently—please enjoy the story!

**Tobi**: ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Tsunade was in her office waiting for the shinobi she asked for to enter her office when there was a knock at the door and a blond ice-blue eyed ninja came bursting in.

"WHAT'S OUR MISSION TSUNADE-BAA-CHAN???" He said loudly…very loudly.

"Naruto if you're going to yell like that then perhaps you _aren't_ mature enough for this, ne?" Tsunade said and Naruto backed away and quieted.

"Gomen Tsunade-shishou, he's just really excited that you're giving us an _S-ranked mission._ Actually I can't believe it either…but still."

Tsunade eyed her apprentice with humor in her eyes, "Yes well all other teams that could do this are out on other missions, so I had no choice."

"Seems you don't have much faith in us then, Tsunade-sama" Kakashi had just walked in when Tsunade had said that.

"Oh believe me I do. If I didn't then why would I send you all on this mission?" She replied.

"That is true," Kakashi replied.

"Can you just get on with what we have to do??" Naruto couldn't help being quiet anymore and really wanted to get on with the mission.

"Right," Tsunade said immediately going into her serious mode, "We have information that the Akatsuki have all gathered in one area for the time being and I knew that we couldn't pass up this offer to try our best to rid ourselves of them—"

"WHOA WE'RE GONNA GO GET RID OF THE AKATSUKI?? AWESOME! FINALLY I GET TO SHOW YOU ALL MY TRUE POWER!" Naruto abruptly cut off the Hokage who gave him a hard glare.

"Yes Naruto you are, and I would very much appreciate it if you'd _keep your voice DOWN!_" Naruto looked away sheepishly but turned back when Tsunade continued, "Anyways, you will be infiltrating their layer and setting off a very, _very_ special smoke bomb that will hopefully eliminate the Akatsuki."

Naruto, Kakashi, and Sakura looked at their Hokage in astonishment before Sakura asked, "What does it do? Is it a poison? Why haven't we ever used it before??"

Tsunade knew they'd have questions though she could only answer a few because while they may have all the questions, she didn't exactly have all the answers.

"The reason that we didn't use it before now is because 1) This is the only one in existence, 2) The Akatsuki haven't ever been gathered like _this_ before so seeing as how there is only one of these we want it to be precise, and 3) We finished making it and testing it out about two weeks ago."

Everyone sweat dropped.

"So what you're really saying—without really saying it—is that we only have one chance in detonating this or we fail the mission?"

"Always noticing these things, eh Kakashi?" Tsunade asked and the masked ninja nodded. "Well you're right. If this doesn't work, then they will know you're there and most likely kill you. So right after you detonate this then run, but make sure you know whether or not it worked."

"How will we know if it worked?" Naruto asked.

They all perked up…they all wanted to know what this was going to do to the rogue ninjas—of course Tsunade would've told them eventually anyway.

"Yes well we know this for sure, that it will send the Akatsuki to a whole other world and make it so that they _cannot_ get back to this world."

The team of shinobi just stared at her like she had three eyes and was foaming at the mouth.

"A-Another…world?" Naruto voiced what they all were thinking and Tsunade nodded.

"You are to leave immediately," Tsunade said and gave them to coordinates to where the Akatsuki were and the jutsu that would release the gas that would send the Akatsuki to another world.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

After a week of searching they finally found the hideout and sure enough, there they all were…the Akatsuki.

"Alright, everyone mask your chakra and we'll get closer," Kakashi said, "Once we get close enough to some sort of opening in the hideout Sakura's going to throw in the container while Naruto and I perform the jutsu to detonate it, ok?"

They all nodded and moved into position. Sakura got closer to the hideout—chakra masked—and looked for an opening in the side of the hideout. Soon enough she found it and could sense all the chakras of the house in that room, which meant they were holding a meeting or something of the like, and that Sakura had to extra careful though with her chakra control it shouldn't be too hard for her.

Once close enough she looked over to her teammates to see if they were ready and they gave her a thumbs up and when she looked back to the window she was near she could feel a chakra coming closer so she chucked the container into the hideout and ran back to Kakashi and Naruto to were just about to detonate it…but not before hearing something from inside the hideout.

"Huh, what the fuck is this? Who the hell's out there? I'll rip the dickhead to shreds—!"

"KAI!" Naruto and Kakashi said at the same time and the container began to let out a thick layer of smoke and the voice was cut off abruptly. The team soon couldn't sense their chakras and left concluding the mission as a success.

(Five minutes earlier _in_ the hideout)

All of the Akatsuki members were gathering in the main room of the hideout for a meeting with their leader.

"I am assuming that you all know why I have called you hear," Pein's voice silenced any chatter that was going on.

"Hai, Leader-sama," they all said in unison.

"Oh, is that so? Then please, someone, enlighten me on why you all think that I called this important meeting," Pein sounded very annoyed but tried to remain calm, for to him all the other men here were complete idiots. Konan was the only person that didn't annoy him to no end at all, but _that_ was a whole different matter.

"It's because of the lack of jinchurikies that have been caught." Itachi said out of the blue and Pein just nodded.

"As of now we only have five biju! We are still in need of the Ichibi, Sanbi, Hachibi, and the Kyuubi. Now please would someone tell me why we have not captured these yet? According to my plans we should have all of them excluding the Kyuubi."

No one said anything. What could they say? The only thing that they could do was stand there staring at him until he spoke again, "If I don't have the Ichibi, Sanbi, and Hachibi in a year's time those responsible for them well be severely punished. Am I clear on that?"

They all nodded.

"Hidan," Pein said coolly.

"Yes Leader-sama?"

Pein pointed to the window and said in a quiet voice, "Go take care of our little guest."

Hidan's eyes widened but he started walking over to the window. Just as he got there, though, something came flying in from outside and hit Hidan in the face. He bent down to pick it up.

"Huh, what the fuck is this? Who the hell's out there? I'll rip the dickhead to shreds—!"

He was cut off as someone outside yelled, "KAI!"

The room filled with smoke but before anyone could escape, they all blacked out.

* * *

**Me**: YIPPE! Ok I know I know this is a very short chapter for me to do BUT I'm trying to perhaps have shorter chapters so that there are more of them! You all know you'd love that!

**Deidara**: Ok WHY didn't anyone notice the pink chick when she was approaching the hideout???

**Me**: Elementary my dear DeiDei-kun!

**Deidara**: Oh and what would that be?

**Me**: You all were to afraid of Pein to notice -.-

**Deidara**: *twitch* Wow

**Me**: Yes well I know you all want some funny stuff to happed and it will! This was just the first chapter to get things going! So please be patient and tell me if I should continue!! Oh and it will be some time before I update again but that's just to get the story going in my head! I know this chapter is good for the story so that's why I've put it up!

Until next time! XD………………………REVIEW o/.\o


	2. Chapter 2

**Me**: WHO'S HAPPY THAT I'M FINALLY WRITING CHAPTER TWO???

*crickets*

**Me**: -. - You all are just mean!!

**Itachilver**: I'M HAPPY!

**Me**: When the hell was the last time you read one of my fanfics???

**Itachilver**: Uhhhhhhh

**Me**: How cruel! Almost none of my friends read them anymore! Not that I want them actually read my badly written fluff…but who else am I gonna get to give it to me straight?

**Itachilver**: Tee hee that's—

**Me**: If you say that's what she said one more time I'll sick Hidan on you!

**Itachilver**: ………………………..THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!

**Me**: WTF?

**Itachilver**: What? Hidan's hot!

**Me**: Yeah well…Ummm…*grins evilly* then I'll sick _Jiraiya_ on you!

**Itachilver**: *silence*

**Me**: Ok well I just have to say one thing before we start.

"_**This is how the Akatsuki will talk when in kitty form!" **_Only they—and other cats—will be able to understand what they are saying. Mmmk? Good! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111 (Haha '1's…READ!)

* * *

Abby let out a very long sigh. Here she was talking to her parents five days before they were to leave on vacation—and by 'they' I mean Abby's parents. Though from what she was hearing right now it almost sounded like they weren't going.

"Your father and I have been talking,"Abby's mother was telling her, "and we aren't too sure about leaving alone for two months."

Yes you hear right. Don't think that your screen is broken because yes her parents are leaving on a two month vacation; leaving her at home alone for two months.

"Mom you aren't canceling your vacation are you?" Abby said with forced concern. You'd think that a fifteen year old would be more than ecstatic about her parents leaving for a two month vacation right? Well apparently you haven't meat Abby.

It's not that she was depressed about not going to Hawaii, oh no, she was depressed about the fact that she was going to be completely alone for two whole months. Freaky right? That's about the opposite of what any normal teen would think. But who ever said she was normal?

"No," her father said, "we're just concerned about you being alone so long."

_And you're telling me this five days before you leave becauseeeeeee? _She thought, but said, "Well you don't have to worry about me. I'll be fine. Honestly with my friends all you have to worry about is Alex burning the house down by making her signature fried ham!" **(A/N: IT'S SO GOOD! Yes my friend actually does this when she comes over! And I make the ramen! Oopsies getting off track)**

Her parents just stared at her when she said, "Kidding geez."

Her parents still looked at her funny before continuing, "It's not you getting in trouble that we're worried about," her dad continued, "you said yourself that you'd die if you were to live alone."

It was true. Abby was your typical doesn't-get-in-trouble kind of girl. It was also true that she'd die if she left alone for just one night. She's been left alone at her house before but never at night.

"Well I was only kidding when I said that," Abby said, then mumbled, "sort of at least…"

Her mother laughed before saying, "That's why we're planning on getting you someone to keep you company while we are gone."

_Oh. Hell. No! She did _not_ get me a babysitter! I'M FIFTEEN! Emphasis on the _teen! She thought loudly.

"Mom, dad, I don't need a babysitter! I'm old enough to be a babysitter!!" I said.

"That's why we aren't getting you one," her dad said.

"What," Abby confused now!! "Well then what…"

"We've thought long and hard on it and we think that you are ready for the responsibility," her mother continued for the father, "and we think that you're ready to perhaps have another pet."

There was silence in the room.

_A-A-A p-pet…? They f-finally caved? _Even her mind was silent until…

"YES FINALLY! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO, SO, SO, SO, SO, MUCH!!!" She yelled and glomped both of them in massive hugs.

"I think she likes the idea," said her mother, which was answered with an excited squeal from Abby and a nod from her father.

After she let go of her parents her dad told her all the serious stuff about this, "Now before you ask, yes you can have more than one but you have to remember you will be alone with them for two months. You have to take complete and total care of them and not forget to feed them or take care of litter box, which brings me to also say you have to house train them, and I hate to say this but you'll also have to pick up any…leavings coming from either the top or bottom of the cat." The reason he said cat was because that's what they had before—they died of a disease fatal to cats—and he knew that she'd want a cat and not some other animal.

She stared at him and thought for a minute, _Well actually the more I have the more sounds and stuff I can blame on them…_

It startled her parents more than anything when she said, "Ok but I want a lot."

Their house wasn't the biggest around, but it wasn't small either. It satisfied the small three person family enough, though it admittedly could hold a lot more, which is where the pets came in.

"Are you sure about that Abby?" Her mother asked and she just nodded.

"Alright, well to the Humane Society then," stated her dad.

And so they all got into her mom's car and drove off.

* * *

At the Humane Society

* * *

"_**Leader-sama," **_Sasori caught his leader's attention, _**"I've been thinking, we are most likely not all going to be adopted together."**_

"_**I have thought of this, Sasori." **_Pein replied.

"_**Have you come up with anything for it?"**_

Pein looked away as he stated, _**"Konan and I have been discussing it since dawn."**_

Everyone only looked away disappointed.

Though Pein then spoke again with a hiss in his voice, _**"I only said we've been talking since dawn. I never said that I didn't have at least a vague idea of what we would do!"**_

Everyone looked back as he continued, _**"I warn you that it isn't the best idea, but it's all we can come up with. If we are separated then be sure to remember how you get to your capturers home, then make your way to the tall oak palm tree that we passed on the way here and hide until someone else comes. After a month whoever is there will have to give up on the rest and find a way home."**_

"_**What the hell?? Why only a month?" **_Hidan asked.

"_**Because by then we were either killed for not being adopted, or were adopted and were both trapped and not able to get out, or killed." **_Pein stated and all fell silent.

After about an hour a family of three came in and came over to the little room that the Akatsuki were in.

The Humane Society was arranged so that when you entered to the left and right of the doors were little rooms with cats in one and dogs in another.

Abby looked over the door—it was one of the ones that was cut in half horizontally—to look at nine little cats…….sitting there doing nothing but seeming to converse with each other and then look up at her and go back to 'talking.'

Abby took this time to look at each one to see which ones she'd want.

One of them seemed to have orange fur—reminded her of Firestar from Warriors **(A/N: Yes I do read that series! Sorry if that spoiled anything for some! But c'mon did you really think he's not make that title??? Oops again off track)**—and also had orange eyes. _Well so much for looking like Firestar…I'm almost positive that I'd have named him that if it had green eyes…_

The next was a tabby that seemed to have almost purple fur! Though it was more of a light purple-blue type thing… it also had nice lavender-y purple eyes. All in all it was a very pretty cat.

The next one she looked at however looked even odder though. Sure it was a nice light brown and had soft green eyes but it had black stripes on it. Sure you're thinking 'oh well stripes on a cat are very normal' but these looked almost like…stitches. Though when she looked closer it really was just his fur! It creeped her out but he still seemed semi-cute.

Of course there was an even odder cat that was black and white. His right side was black and his left was white! Creepy but still cute in Abby's eyes. She's a freak remember? Let's continue to the next cat shall we?

Next was one that was red, not too odd and had brown eyes. Nothing too odd about that one other than the fact that it had a random _perfect_ circle right over his heart and had red on it that almost looked like kanji to Abby but she didn't know that much about Japanese, she may love anime but she's not fluent in their language.

She almost laughed at the next one. It was pure blond! Like a normal person's hair…yet it was so blond it looked…yellow. Not only that but it had a bit of fur covering its left eye…how odd and it also seemed that there was a silver patch over the left eye, but when she did look at the eyes she was stunned. They were one of the most pretty blue eyes ever. _Good thing it's not a white cat. White cats with blue eyes always have problems…or at least I think that kind does…hmmm. Note to self: Look that up!_

After seeing such odd cats she finally saw two that were pretty much normal. One was all black and the other seemed to be a silvery white. Although their eyes were red. It creeped her out but the black cat's eyes seemed to almost change from red to black but she just wrote it off as a trick of the light.

After looking at either of them she finally noticed the ninth. He was right behind the door but it was a wonder that she didn't see him before. HE WAS HUGE! Not to mention, the cat was blue. Blue as the sky. His eyes seemed almost…fishy too. Abby stared in wonder before noticing strange markings under his eyes. It looked like he had gills!

Her face must have been very surprised because a volunteer came over to say, "We don't know why they look the way they do, or even what breed they are, but we suspect that they're some of those rare cats that have a little something more to them. Same with their personalities. Usually that many male cats in one little room—that aren't fixed—would have torn each other apart. Some have tried to fight, but whenever we came to investigate the orange one would hiss and they'd stop. We just figure that they must be their own little group of misfits since we found them all together. That's we put them all together in here like this."

"I see," Abby said, "you said that there are a lot of males. How many?"

"There is only one female," the volunteer said, "it's the one over there." She pointed to the purple cat.

Now being the shy-Naruto-fangirl-and-I-love-Uchihas she just had to let out but one syllable, "Hn" Though on the inside she was saying, _Well I know I'm getting that one!_

While she was thinking that every single cat looked at her.

"_**Whoa Itachi she used your word! You know this chick or something?" **_Hidan said.

Itachi just shook his head. None of the Akatsuki, in all their travels had ever heard anyone besides Itachi—and probably Sasuke—use that word.

None of the people noticed and her mother asked Abby, "Which ones do you want?"

Abby pondered this for a minute looking over at them and seeing that almost everyone was in a group of two. She was also thinking about how they were all found together. She came to her decision and said, "All please."

He parents stared at her and she said, "Well if they were all found together and they seem to know each other then I don't want to separate them and I like these cats. Please mom? They're all so cute!"

Her mother had to agree with her on some of the cats, but others just scared her like the black and white one and the blue one but after looking her husband agreed that they could get all of them. It wasn't like they wouldn't be cared for, they would be.

So they packed them up in cages—two to a cage—and loaded them into the car.

On the way back the Akatsuki talked amongst them as Abby looked at the cats, happy she finally had a pet again.

"_**She seems to be very interested in us, ne?"**_ Kisame had said.

"_**If she doesn't stop fucking staring I'll rip her fucking head off!"**_ Hidan swore but was silenced with a hiss from Pein.

"_**If we harm her then we'll never win her trust."**_ Pein had told him

"_**Well how the hell is she supposed to help? She thinks we're just mindless cats!"**_ Hidan replied.

"_**Well you are pretty mindless,"**_ Kakuzu said and Hidan just glared at him.

"_**I'm pretty sure that I've heard of this,"**_ Itachi said. They all looked at him and he clarified, "_**the curse we're under. I'm almost positive that it was Konoha that did this to us. When I was an ANBU I heard of them tossing the idea around. I didn't think that this could be that but after thinking on it I'm almost positive now."**_

"_**What does it do?" **_Pein asked.

"_**It sends you to another world and makes sure you can't get back."**_

Everyone—cat—was silent.

"_**World…?"**_ Deidara said and Itachi nodded.

"_**That's a load of shit!"**_ Hidan said.

"_**Not entirely, do any of you recognize at least half of the things we've seen here?" **_Itachi said and no one spoke. _**"I also haven't sensed anyone's chakra besides our own…has anyone here detected chakra signatures besides our own?"**_

Again silence.

"_**So we really are in another world?"**_ Sasori broke the silence and Itachi nodded.

"_**Then that gives us all the more reason to win this girl's trust."**_ Pein said. He hated relying on others like this, but it was the only choice they had at the moment sadly. _**"Is there anything else that you heard about this, Itachi?"**_

Itachi thought for a minute before saying, _**"I'm almost positive that they said something along the lines of 'If they victim comes in contact with hot water they will return to their true form' though no one besides the research team would know what they meant by that, even the Hokage."**_ Itachi finished.

"_Then we better stay away from hot water. __**Since this must be what they meant by 'true form." **_Zetsu said.

"_**Yes,"**_ Kakuzu said, _**"after all, cats hate water."**_

"_**Hold up a sec!" **_Hidan said. _**"Why the hell don't we just turn back into humans and get the hell out of here??"**_

"_**Because we wouldn't know where to go or what to do and she lives here so her family will keep us relatively safe until we can make up a plan to get home" **_Itachi said. _**"It wouldn't help too much if they found out who we are. Even if they don't know who we are they still wouldn't want cats that turn into humans in their house now would they?"**_

"_**So it's settled that we stay away from water." **_Pein said.

Everyone nodded in agreement as they pulled up to a house. The people took them inside and into the girl's room; her parents saying that until they were house trained they needed to stay here, and also then Abby could watch over them more closely since she spent most of her time in her room. Hidan and Deidara were perfectly fine with this but then Konan gave them a death glare and they shut up.

In the room they were set on the floor and when the parents left and closed the door—so the cats wouldn't get out—the girl came over to open all the cages while saying, "Welcome home kitties!"

Once they got out of their cages they all stopped when they saw what was on the walls of this girl's room.

The nine-tailed jinchuriki, Itachi's younger brother, Kakashi Hatake the Copy Ninja of Konoha, the one-talied jinchuriki and his siblings, Orochimaru, Kabuto, and Itachi himself were on posters attached to the wall all around them.

"_**Oi Itachi,"**_ Hidan said and Itachi looked over to him, _**"I thought you fucking said we were in another whole fucking world!"**_

Itachi looked as confused as the rest when he said, _**"I did."**_

* * *

**Me:** TAA DAA! YAY CHAPTER DONE! Are you all happy? YOU BETTER BE! AND YOU BETTER REVIEW CUZ I BARELY GOT ANY FOR THE LAST ONE! DX I mean I love that so many added me as a fav and story alert but review! Plz?

**Hidan**: REVIEW OR YOU WILL BECOME A SACRIFISE!

**Me**: o.o Ummm TYVM HIDAN-KUN!

**Hidan**: Don't call me that.

**Me**: Oh ok so you want to end up with Kakuzu. Alright I can do that!

**Hidan**: Oh for the love of Jashin no!!!!!

**Me**: Then let me call you Hidan-kun!

**Hidan**: Fine…

**Me**: Tyvm! Oh and this one was a lot longer than the last! So be happy! And review please!!!! Or I'll eat you! Ummm yeah I won't but I'll be very, very, very etc. SAD! And don't worry about lack of stuff going on…it's only the second chapter!!! Patience is a virtue!! A virtue that _I_ don't have but the rest of you should!!! Plz? Lolz…………………….still review! XD Next chapter will come the names! XD


	3. Chapter 3

HELLO ALL!!! WELL HERE IT IS! CHAPTER 3!!!!!! I'M HAPPY! Yeah I was actually just really bored so I decided to work on this…heh heh.

**Deidara**: Well whoopee for you.

Hey don't make me get Tyler!!

**Deidara**: o.o

That's what I thought!! Hey guys!! Question! I've been thinking lately on how I could relieve some stress and since I always love to write these little A/N's I was wondering if you think I should write a little fanfic type thing for it. Every chapter would just be another little thing like this. I just love to type and I'd be sure that it was funny! You all could even give me ideas! Lolz

**Hidan**: That's stupid

YOU'RE STUPID!

**Hidan**: WTF?

Uhhh…gomen I've just had people piss me off today…though it's kinda been over small things that people shouldn't get pissed at but whatever lolz. Oh and BTW I'm listening to Linkin Park while writing this!!! XD

**Itachilver**: YAY!! Hey Sasuke do you like Linkin Park?

**Sasuke**: Hn

I SHALL TAKE THAT AS A YES!

**Itachilver**: Can we just get to the story??

Hmph fine! *Glares at Itachilver*

**Itachilver**: *Runs for the hills*

ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!

* * *

As the Akatsuki looked around Abby noticed all their eyes fix on her poster of Itachi, Sasuke, Kabuto, and Orochimaru.

"Oi," she said to the cats and they looked over to her, "don't be checking him out, he's _my_ man!" Little did she know that she was talking to 'her man.'

All of them just looked over at her then at Itachi who was about to faint. Abby noticed them look all weird.

"Hey if you all cough up hairballs right after getting home I will so kill you!"

They all just stared at her while she went on talking—mostly to herself.

"Of course now that I don't like Sasuke all that much I should take down some of the posters with him and put up the other sides of them…and I really need an Akatsuki poster!" Every cat looked about ready to faint or maybe claw her eyes out. Oh how they wished they could speak!

"Well that's a matter for later!" Abby said, "There's a much more important matter that we must attend to!" She walked over to them and sat on the floor with them before saying excitedly, "TIME FOR NAMES!"

They all wanted to flee the area.

"_**What the hell does she mean by names???" **_Hidan said.

"_**Well we are her pets, Hidan. So naturally she's going to want to name us!" **_Konan spoke. She didn't speak all that much so all the cats flinched when she did.

"All right well first I think I'll name you," Abby said pointing to Zetsu. Zetsu gulped as she picked him up and put him on her lap and started to pet his head as she thought. She noticed how the line of color went right down to his tail and she briefly wondered if it went somewhere else too…

"Sorry kitty but I must know," she said as she picked him up and looked…she was right but she could feel every pair of eyes on her and suddenly felt awkward.

"What the hell are you all staring at? I was curious!" When she looked back at the cat he was only staring at her…he looked at little embarrassed, "Gomen kitty I just wanted to know. Now back to the naming…" Just like that she was back to trying to name him.

"Ok I can't come up with anything so guess what? Your name is now Fred. Don't complain I'm not creative."

They all sweat dropped and Zetsu only went back with everyone and layed on the ground not looking at anyone… It's safe to assume he didn't like his name and was still embarrassed that she looked…there.

Next she picked up Kakuzu, "Ha yours is easy! Your name my dear kitty cat is Stripes! Live with it!" Then she set him down and he only joined Zetsu in sulking over that. S-class criminals did not deserve even this torture!

"Allrighty then," she picked up Deidara and put him on her lap and started to pet him on his head. "Awww you're sooo cute!" Deidara looked up at her and did a cat-smirk. To Abby it was just an odd facial expression thingy. "Ok well yours is also very easy my dear cat."

Deidara paused and stiffened, ready for the horrible name she was going to give him, "Haha your name shall be, Blondie."

Deidara sweat dropped and sat in his spot, angry.

"_**She isn't exactly creative now is she?" **_Sasori said. Everyone nodded as she reached for Hidan.

She smiled widely, "I always thought this was a horrible name but now I just can't help but use it on you! It suits you so well!"

"_**I didn't know that you could name a cat 'Psycho-maniac-with-a-killing-problem'." **_Kakuzu said and Hidan hissed at him.

"Hey stop it!" Abby said flicking him in the head. "There will be no fighting! Now then, your name shall be Snowball!!"

Hidan stared at her, not sure he heard what he just heard, but after a minute got out of her lap and went to sulk like the rest of them.

"Well if you don't like it then tough cookies! I am the master and I will name you." Abby said. They all looked up to her and then at Pein and back.

"Tch, whatever. NEXT VICTOM!" All the cats flinched away but she reached for Konan. "Well your name should actually be the easiest one since you _are_ the only girl," Konan cringed waiting for the fate that awaited her. "Your name will be Princess. That was the name of my other girl cat…" She trailed off as she remembered her beloved cat.

Konan saw how much that cat must have meant to her and felt sorry for her, having to lose a pet like that. She supposed she could live with the name since they wouldn't be there all that long. Though it was still sort of embarrassing.

"Before you hate the name though," Abby said suddenly, "I was very little when I chose it so just live with it." Konan seemed to kitty nod and jumped down to go sit next to Pein again.

"Awww you must really like him, ne? You're always near him Princess!" Konan immediately blushed from that accusation while Pein just stiffened and looked away from her. "Hmph well little kitty if you don't go after her one of the others may just take her for their own!" Abby said and giggled. "Great now I'm playing matchmaker for a bunch of cats!" She said as she hung her head.

"_**Ok is it just me or is she crazy?"**_ Sasori asked.

"_**It isn't you, un. She's defiantly crazy, un!"**_ Deidara replied.

"Ok well perhaps I'll name you next," she said as she reached for Itachi. "You know I have half a mind to name you after Itachi since you stared at him on my poster! Hopefully I don't have a gay cat…" Itachi was about to claw her eyes out when she continued "though I don't blame you for staring…he _is_ hot after all…" Abby seemed to just stare off into space for a minute before remembering the cat in her lap. "Oh right your name!"

Itachi was admittedly scared that she knew about him and the fact that she seemed to be obsessed.

"Ok well yours is another simple name and I'm sorry if you hate it but I'm not good at naming and this is just a nice name for you. Drum roll please!" She looked around at the cats before saying, "Fine be poor sports. Ok well your name is George!"

They all fell to the ground anime style before sweat dropping. "Hey it was the name of Princess' brother! They were both my cats and he looks like him! Fell honored George. Just don't act like that mama's boy mmmk? Then we'll get along just fine." She finished with a smile.

Itachi jumped down, _**"And I thought that 'Fred' was bad. What's with these freakish names anyways?"**_

"_**It's another world isn't it? That's why. They probably have different languages and such."**_ Kakuzu said.

"_**Well they just need to learn ours and give us actual names."**_ Itachi replied

"_**At least she didn't name you Weasel,"**_ Hidan said. Itachi turned on him and hissed. _**"Uh oh Weasel's pissed. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!" **_Hidan was about to fake run and Itachi was about to pounce on him when Pein spoke.

"_**That's enough,"**_ Pein's voice roared. _**"I will not have you all messing this up because of petty squabbling!"**_

Everyone went back to their sulking about their names—you don't want to piss Pein off anymore than he already it when he's pissed—as Abby picked up Kisame. "Alrighty well you're a big one now aren't you?" She said as she put him next to her to pet him, "Ok well you kind of look like a fish…" Kisame looked up at her with annoyance in his eyes. "Well you do! It's not my fault that your parents must have been a cat and a shark!"

The rest of the cats let out _mrrows_ of laughter though one quick glance at them from Kisame shut them up.

"Ok well your name I now dub as Fishy!!!" Every single cat started laughing again and Kisame only went to go sit in his spot in line and glared daggers at Abby.

"Ok now for you," she went to pick up Pein and all the cats waited to see what he would do. "Awww you're so nice kitty, and _cute_," she started to pet the top of his head. "Awww how nice of you not to bite me. Not that any of you have," she said as she put a finger to her chin and made a thinking face while Pein tried not to claw her eyes out for the 'cute' comment.

"Oh well." She shrugged her shoulders. "I wish I could give you a better name kitty but I don't have that many good ideas. I would name you spot because of all the dots on your face but that kind of a dog name. So I'll just name you something that I name a lot of things." She paused and everyone looked at her expectantly before she said, "Bob." They all stared at her, including Pein. "You're name is Bob! You don't like it, like I said; I'm sorry but live with it."

Pein only got up and went to sit back with Konan. Though he didn't show it you could tell he was none too happy about the name.

"Ok now for the last one," she reached for Sasori and put him on her lap. "Hmmm… I don't really know what to name you. I already used Bob, Fred, and George… I don't have anything else…" Sasori thought that maybe he could get off with just being called 'kitty' but knew that wouldn't happen.

While she was thinking Abby suddenly felt a vibration in her pocket, "GAH WHAT THE HELL?! Oh heh oops."

All the cats looked over to see what happened and she only pulled a little rectangular thing out of her pocket.

"I really hate the vibrate on this thing. It makes noise! What good is vibrate if it makes noise??" She said as she opened it and it said she had a text. "Ok then well now my cats must think I'm a spaz…"

She opened the message from Mason.

_Message: Hey whats up XD_

_Reply: Naming the newest members of the family. Though idk wat to name one of them… it's a boy btw_

"Ok well little kitty your name is now in the hands of my boyfriend. You may not like what you get, but you can't get mad at me! I was gonna name you Pinocchio because I love that movie right now but it just doesn't seem right… You aren't a puppet after all." She said as she pointed at him while talking.

Kisame and Hidan burst out into little cat laughs while Deidara tried to not laugh and everyone else just chuckled while Sasori layed there annoyed.

"_**If you all don't shut up she'll be naming you all that!"**_ Sasori said and everyone started to calm.

"_**Gomen Sasori no Danna, but you have to admit that's just too funny, un."**_ Deidara said while Sasori only glared at him more. Deidara cringed away from it until Sasori's gaze was broken when he heard her little device start to vibrate again.

_Message: Hmmm…. Name him Drizzit_

_Reply: Hmm I like it. TYVM MASON! Lolz XD_

"Ok well Mason has officially named you Drizzit because I can't think of anything else." Sasori supposed that was better than what some of the others had been named, but it still wasn't good enough for and S-class criminal, or at least that's what he thought.

"All right well you all play nice while I get on the computer." And with that she left to her bed and pulled her laptop on it/

"_**All in favor that we kill her in the night raise your hand,"**_ Hidan said.

"_**I already told you all that we can't harm her if we want to win her trust. If I find that any of you did anything to her you will have to deal with me."**_ Pein said. They all nodded.

"_**What do you suppose that thing was that she took out of her pocket?"**_ Zetsu asked after a minute of silence.

"_**Since she said that her boyfriend was going to name me and she got the name a few minutes later, I'm guessing that it's some sort of messaging device."**_ Sasori said and they all nodded.

"_**Why the hell did she have to name me 'Fishy'?"**_ Kisame said in a sad tone.

"_**Because you look like a cat fish, duh."**_ Hidan said mockingly.

Kisame glared at him, _**"Well at least I'm not Snowball. Seriously that's just not right."**_

Hidan hissed at him and unsheathed his claws.

Pein only left to let them sort it out. Konan on the other hand would have usually followed but the little comment that the girl had made slightly embarrassed her… It was so close to the truth.

After a few minutes Itachi had come over and dispersed the fighting and they all went off to do their own thing.

"_**All of you get over here right now."**_ Pein said suddenly.

They all got up from where they were and went over to him. _**"Itachi you said yourself that we are in another world, so please explain to me how the hell a girl like her could know anything about us!"**_ Pein said coldly.

"_**Your guess is as good as mine Leader-sama,"**_ Itachi replied. Pein glared at him. The Akatsuki never talked to him like that. _**"Although,"**_ Itachi continued, _**"I was thinking about that too and I came up with something. All the posters show signs that Sasuke still lives in Konoha. We all know that my foolish little brother left long ago to train under Orochimaru so as to kill me. If she knew anything about us she would have pictures of more recent happenings. I also know that the third Hokage died around the time he left," **_Itachi said gesturing towards a poster with Team 7, Kakashi, Iruka, and the Third in front of the Hokage faces, _**"I also know that Tsunade's face would have been added to the Hokage faces by now. If I'm right this girl doesn't even know Sasuke leaves."**_

Every cat only stared at him.

"_**This could be true but we can assume that she knows past this. Look for any signs that she may know more while we're here… And any sign that she may be a shinobi."**_

"_**Leader-sama if she were a shinobi don't you think that she would have figured out who we were by now and killed us?"**_ Kisame said.

"_**That or she's in alliance with Konoha and is to keep guard over us while we're here."**_ Pein replied.

They all nodded before Hidan spoke up, _**"She wouldn't have posters like these on her wall and she wouldn't have handled us the way she did if she were a shinobi. Any sane shinobi would never do that even if we were in this form."**_ Pein gestured him to go on. _**"And there's no possible way that she could have these posters. We know that Itachi has no idea in hell how that picture got there so we can assume no one else knows about this either."**_

"_**Then how does she have them, un?"**_ Deidara asked.

"_**That is just one of the other things we will have to find out."**_ Pein said. "_**Meeting adjured."**_ And just like that they all scattered into different parts of the room.

After a few more minutes and some vibrating from her phone Abby spoke, "Ok well you will get to meet Mason and Chris this weekend. Hopefully I can get Alex over here too so I won't be alone with those two seeing as my parents won't be here…. They'll either rape me or destroy my house. Yeah Taylor needs to come."

They all looked at her like she was serious.

* * *

Meh I don't really like this one. But the fun has yet to begin!!! She still has to figure out who they are! That's gonna be so much fun to write!

Don't forget about the little thing that I said up there ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ because I neeeed to know! I need things to not bore me .-.

Oh and people please review!! If you favorite me or the story or have the story on your alerts review! I love that you all add my story on there but c'mon people! Show me that you love this story! I'll try to reply to each review!! Please? XD Because personally I dont think I'm doing well on this ._. so I can only know that people want me to do this if you review!!!!!! TYVM!


	4. Chapter 4

Ok well here's chapter four! I actually started working on this right after I posted chapter 3 XD. But I got bored 'cause I didn't get any messages from my myspace, facebook, or on here. So yeah I was very bored…

**Deidara**: No one cares!!

WELL I DO!! And you should too! Oh and HAVE YOU ALL READ THE MOST RECENT CHAPTER OF NARUTO??? DID YOU _**SEE KISAME?? **_OMFJ!!!!!!!!!!

**Itachilver**: Don't spoil it for them!!...... BUT TELL ME!!

Nope! Once you get over here again then I'll tell you!! Oh and in case any of you were wondering… Yes Itachilver is in this story!! I'm almost positive that you can figure out who it is… Lolz.

**Hidan**: GET ON WITH THE STORY!!!!

_ You're just a meanie Hidan!!!

**Hidan**: And I care why?

SO CRUEL!!!

**Sasuke**: Why the hell haven't I been in you're A/Ns recently?

Oh heh heh I kinda lost major interest in you…

**Sasuke**: WTF??

I still love you but the Akatsuki have caught my attention right now… Blame fanfictions! I've read some really good AkatSaku ones recently… Though I really wish there were more!! Have I just like read all the good ones or something???

**Itachilver**: Probably

;_; You have no idea how sad that makes me!!! Oh and people I don't think I have to say thing but! I DO NOT OWN NARUTO _**OR**_ ANY SONGS BY THE AWESOME ARTISTS THAT ARE IN HERE!! Yes that means music is being played here! You don't have to listen to it while you read but if you wanna then knock yourselves out lolz.

**Deidara**: JUST GET ON WITH IT!!

Be nice and I will!

**Deidara**: …. Fine. Please get on with it.

ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I just love to do that XD)

* * *

**_"What the hell does she mean 'They'll rape her'?"_** Kakuzu said.

"_**Well apparently this friend of hers should really come or else…"**_ Sasori trailed off and they all cringed. Sure they could kill without batting an eye, but they never _raped_ someone! In fact most of the Akatsuki were actually virgins. Not many were so sure about Hidan but the rest were sure virgins.

"_**As long as we stay away from where they are I'm good, un."**_ Deidara said and Itachi nodded in agreement.

"_**Ugh, you all are so stupid!"**_ Konan said suddenly.

"_**What?"**_ Deidara said.

"_**You can tell that she's joking! What girl in her right mind would say that she's going to be raped like she's saying tomorrow's weather is cloudy with a chance of rain?"**_

"_**Uhhh we aren't girls Konan, un. How would we know that?"**_ Deidara said.

"_**Well I wouldn't think that you would state rape like the weather either."**_ Konan spat.

"_**Geez what's got you all pissy?"**_ Hidan said. Konan only rolled her eyes and went back to staring into space while listening to all of them bicker.

"Ok kitties well I'm going to be playing some music now, please don't go deaf when I sing ok?"

The Akatsuki looked at her in confusion. _How was she going to play music? There weren't any instruments in here._

But she only pulled out her ipod (to them it only looked like an odd rectangular thing with odd strings [the wires] coming out of it) and put the 'strings' into her ears and turned it on and listened to Evanescence. She put it on _Haunted_. **(A/N: Ok I know that I said that this character is based on me, but trust me when I say I can't sing! I just need something funny for this story mmk?)**

_Long lost words whisper slowly to me  
Still can't find what keeps me here  
When all this time I've been so hollow...inside_

They were all surprised when she suddenly started to sing.

"_**What the hell is she doing?"**_ Hidan said and jumped up onto her bed. He could hear faint music playing and got closer and realized that it was coming from the device. _**"Guys this thing plays music!"**_

"_**Ahh so she's singing along to it?"**_ Itachi said.

_**"Guess so,"**_ Hidan replied before jumping down.

_(I know your still there)_

_Watching me, wanting me  
I can feel you pull me down  
Fearing you, loving you  
I won't let you pull me down_

"_**I still can't believe someone made an AMV for Sasuke and Itachi from this song,"**_ Abby said in between the lyrics.

"_**What the hell?"**_ Itachi said.

_**"Oh calm down Itachi it's not that bad you know."**_ Kisame said, Itachi glared at him.

_Hunting you, I can smell you  
Alive  
__Your heart pounding in my head_

Watching me wanting me

_I can feel you pull me down  
__Saving me, raping me  
__Watching me_

Itachi looked about ready to shoot someone, _**"What was that Kisame? Not the bad, eh?"**_

"_**Ok Itachi well that was before people wanted you to rape your brother,"**_ Kisame said and chuckled.

"_**Well maybe Itachi isn't the one people want to be doing the raping… un,"**_ Deidara said. Itachi rounded on him.

"_**Say that again."**_

"_**Enough!"**_ Pein said and they went back to listening to her singing the song… Everyone but Itachi just to see if there was anything else hilarious about it.

_Watching me wanting me  
__I can feel you pull me down  
__Fearing you loving you  
__I won't let you pull me down_

"Beep!" Abby said. They all looked up like she was crazy, "I'll never know why they put a random beep at the end of that…"

"_**This worlds 'music' is some of the oddest ever."**_ Kakuzu said.

"_**You got that right,"**_ Hidan agreed.

"Ok what to listen to next…" Abby said as she scrolled through her music. "Oh perfect! I just got this one too!" She selected _White Liar_ by Miranda Lambert.

_Hey white liar  
The truth comes out a little at a time  
And it spreads just like a fire  
Slips off of your tongue like turpentine  
And I don't know why  
White liar_

They all were confused when she started to sing in a rather different manner than what she had just been singing. This didn't sound at all like what she had been singing to before…

_You better be careful what you do  
I wouldn't wanna be in your shoes  
If they ever found you out  
You better be careful what you say  
It never really added up any way  
I got friends in this town_

_Hey white liar  
The truth comes out a little at a time  
And it spreads just like a fire  
Slips off of your tongue like turpentine  
And I don't know why  
White liar_

"Man I really should make a fanfiction for this… Maybe SasuSaku? Or ItaSaku? Ohh I haven't tried Deidara and Sakura yet! I'd probably do Sasuke and Sakura for this part and then her and Itachi for the last part. Lolz leaving your fiancé for his brother… Now that's drama." Abby said.

Itachi was confused when she said him and Sakura at the end of the song, but he knew that it just couldn't be good at all.

_You said you went out to a bar  
And walked some lady to her car  
But your face has more to tell  
Cuz my cousin saw you on the street  
With a red head named Bernice  
Turns out you don't lie too well_

"Heh, Karin can be Bernice! Oh that's just too good! Lolz…" Abby said. "And Hinata can be the cousin! YAY PLOTS!!"

They all looked at her like she had lost it… Not that they ever even thought she had it in the first place.

_Hey white liar  
The truth comes out a little at a time  
And it spreads just like a fire  
Slips off of your tongue like turpentine  
And I don't know why  
White liar_

"Hahaha here comes the Itachi Sakura part!" She just felt like saying it for her own benefit, completely unaware of the fact that all the cats leaned in to hear.

_Here's a bombshell just for you  
Turns out I've been lying too_

"HA TAKE THAT SASUKE!" She burst out and laughed. It's not that she disliked Sasuke, it's that she loves ItaSaku more than SasuSaku.

_Yeah I'm a white liar  
The truth comes out a little at a time  
And it spreads just like a fire  
Slips off of my tongue like turpentine  
And I don't know why  
White Liar_

"Alright well one more before… Ugh _homework!_" She said. The Akatsuki didn't think that they could take much more of what this girl liked in music when to her and everyone else they were great songs. The poor little things. "Ok ummm OH YEAH! My favorite Tim McGraw song!"

She started to play _I Need You_ by Tim McGraw featuring Faith Hill and turned it on high so the cats could hear at the floor.

"_**Think she has it on loud enough?" **_Sasori said.

"**She'll go deaf one day, un."** Deidara said.

They heard singing from the player but Abby didn't start singing yet.

_I wanna drink that shot of whiskey  
I wanna smoke that cigarette  
I wanna smell that sweet addiction on my breath  
I wanna ride cross West Virginia on the backseat of a Cadillac  
You know some cowboys like me go out like that so I need you_

It was kind of like the other song. They both seemed to fall into the same category. Though they all thought that this first part of the song didn't really have much meaning to the rest of it, but they thought, _Well what do we know about their music?_

_Like a needle needs a vein  
Like Uncle Joe in Oklahoma needs a rain  
I need you like a lighthouse needs the coast  
Like the father and the son need the holy ghost  
I need you_

"_**Ok its official; she loves sappy love songs if this is her favorite song!" **_Kisame said and they all nodded.

They didn't expect it when she started to sing along with Faith Hill though.

_I wanna get lost in some corner booth  
Cantina Mexico  
I wanna dance to the static of an a.m. radio  
I wanna wrap the moon around us and lay beside you skin on skin  
Make love 'til the sun comes up and the sun goes down again cause I need you_

Konan twitched when Hidan, Deidara, and Kisame smirked at that and cuffed them over the head with sheathed claws and meowed, "Smirk one more time and I'm taking off an ear next time, got it?"

They all were quiet and went back to just listening. When Konan was pissed like that it was best to not try and provoke her…

_Like a needle needs a vein  
Like Uncle Joe in Oklahoma needs a rain  
I need you  
Like a lighthouse needs the coast  
Like the father and the son need the holy ghost  
I need you  
Oh, I need you_

_I wanna drink that shot of whiskey  
I wanna smoke that cigarette  
You know some cowboys like me go out like that I need you  
Oh, I need you_

"Damn that song is just too awesome! But, argh, I have to work on stupid homework!" With that she turned off her ipod and ceased her—to her—horrible singing and went to her small desk to work on said 'stupid homework.'

"_**Ok that was very odd…"**_ Kisame said. They all nodded.

After about two hours of working she finally finished just in time for dinner.

"Abby dinner!!" Her dad called from the kitchen.

"Coming!" She replied and got up to leave. She opened the door and got out making sure not to let any of the cats out.

She ran out of her room, made a quick right, then a left and ran straight to the kitchen table. Her house wasn't all that big, but it suited her and her three _person _family—now a twelve living beings family. Little did Abby know—of course—that it really was a twelve person family now… Heh.

"How are the cats?" Her father asked.

"Oh them? I think I made them go deaf actually with my singing earlier…" She replied

"Really?" Her mother said with a laugh.

"Well actually it was when I was talking about how the songs would make good plot lines for SasuSakuIta's sooooo…. It was really weird how George stiffened whenever I said anything about him and Sakura… Or anything about Sasuke for that matter…"

To her everything she said made perfect sense, but to her parents all they heard was, "Blah blah blah. Blah. Blah blah blah blah. Blah." So they just nodded their heads and ate.

Abby's dad used to be a cook so he fixed the family's dinner most of the time. Though Abby did get tired of having chicken or pork or some sort of beef almost every night she was very thankful for it. I mean how many kids can say that they get tired of this? **(A/N: In case you're wondering yes my dad does cook like this and yes I do get tired of it… heh… BUT if you had meat, veggies, and a side like rice or potatoes almost every night since you could eat this stuff, wouldn't you get tired of it too? Yes you would… Oopsies… off track again… heh…)**.

"Oh Abby," her dad said.

"Yeah?"

"The litter box is ready out in the garage. You just have to bring it into your room and put the litter in."

"WHAT?" She never touched the litter box… Though _**not**_ in a preppy way.

"Don't worry it's clean. You're father cleaned it and it's been out in the garage for a year now." Her mother said.

Abby paused for a minute… "How the heck did you clean it?" She shuddered at what came to mind.

"I put it in the drive way and hosed it out." Her dad said.

"Oh ok. I thought you took some Kaboom and a sponge and…" She trailed off and shuddered again.

While Abby was having pleasant conversation with her parents the Akatsuki were having different problems…

"_**WHERE THE HELL IS THE FUCKING BATHROOM FOR CATS?" **_Hidan meowed. Loudly.

"_**Do you really have to announce to the world you have to use the bathroom?"**_ Kakuzu said.

"_**Yes I fucking do!"**_

"_**Well go in the one over there,"**_ Kakuzu flicked his tail to an ajar door that lead to—clearly—a bathroom.

"_**I went in there… THIS WORLD IF FUCKED UP! HOW THE HELL DO THEY EVEN USE THE BATHROOM IN THERE???" **_Hidan boomed.

"_**It can't be that hard."**_ Sasori put in.

"_**Then you go and try! It was apparently made for humans so how the hell is a cat supposed to use it???"**_ Hidan replied.

"_**Fine,"**_ Kakuzu and Sasori stated before going into the bathroom only to return a few minutes later.

"_**This world is very fucked up."**_ Kakuzu said. Sasori only nodded his head.

Back at the humane society they used newspaper for the cats. Not that any of them actually knew what it was for so they all just decided to wreak havoc where they were and go wherever their butts were… The volunteers were not happy at all.

"_**Well I don't think going on this type of flooring would be good. It's not like the floor at the other place."**_ Sasori stated and they all nodded.

Heh the Akatsuki talking about where to go to the bathroom? Oh how things change when you are a cat.

Just then Abby burst in carrying a big rectangular thing and set it down in front of all of them then left and came back with a thing of what seemed to be big gray pieces of sand. She poured it into the box then turned to them. "Behold kitties! Your shit hole!" Abby smiled widely at this.

The rest of them only stared at her.

"It's where you do your…business kitties! As in go to the bathroom here!" She clarified

"_**Well Hidan that solves your problem doesn't it?"**_ Kakuzu said. Hidan only growled at him.

"I told you all not to fight!" Abby said as she came over to break up the cat-fight… Wow a cat-fight between two guys….

"Ok you all, if you don't go in there and I find you went on my carpet, your noses are going in it until you learn not to pee on my floor! If you have to have an accident at least go into the bathroom so it won't stain! In fact I should probably put the litter box in there…" She picked up the box and set it in the bathroom. "There we go. Now try your bests not to fling the litter everywhere kitties!! I don't want to have to vacuum it all…"

Well that is if they ever used to box… Maybe they should just see how the humans used the bathroom here… That could work better than just using such a humiliating act.

"Ok well I have to work now guys and girl." She said.

"_**I thought she already worked on things and finished, un,"**_ Deidara said.

"_**Me too,"**_ Sasori said.

Abby suddenly turned on them, "Ok you guys, now that I have more people to help me I need to feed you my ideas!"

When her other cats were alive she's sometimes tell Princess her ideas just to see how they sounded. She wasn't ever looking for a nod or shake of the cat's head, only to see how her ideas sounded out loud because everything sounds different when it's said rather than thought.

"_**What the hell does she mean by ideas?"**_ Hidan said.

"Ok guys I have this idea for and Itachi and Sakura thing," Itachi nearly died when she said that and everyone laughed. "Oi, don't be mean until you hear it!" They all quieted to let her continue, "Ok well at first I was just going to have Itachi and Sakura have a one night sort of fling ya know? And her not get pregnant—" Insert Itachi dying and laughter from all "—but I didn't know how to get them together so I decided that she _should_ get pregnant!" Itachi was now having a seizure while everyone was laughing their assed off. "That way they'll both have to work together to raise the child! And of course they find love in the process, but don't realize it until the baby is born. Then they get married and live happily ever after." **(A/N: Yes this is one of my ideas!! Lolz XD)** "So what do you all think??"

Hidan, Deidara, and Kisame were ROFLTFAO while everyone were staring or chuckling.... Besides Itachi who was officially dead.

"Eh? AHH GEORGE NO DON'T DIE!!" She ran over to Itachi and whacked him over the head and he shot up looking around franticly.

"_**I. Will. Kill. Her. In. Her. Sleep!"**_ Itachi said. The fur on his neck bristled.

"_**Oh but she writes such beautiful stories about you!"**_ Kisame said.

"_**Shut. Up."**_ Itachi replied.

"_**Just like an Uchiha to use only one word per sentence."**_ Kisame said back.

Itachi was just pissed now so he went into his own little emo corner—Uchihas were experts at making emo corners.

"Ok seems you all love it so I'm going to write a few chapters now." With that she got to work.

"_**Can she like stalk people through worlds?"**_ Konan said suddenly.

All the cats whipped their heads to face her in surprise—even Pein.

"_**What? I'm not allowed to talk or something? This is the second time today that I've talked yet all of you still seem surprised I have a voice!"**_ She said.

"_**It's just that you never talk, ya know?"**_ Kisame said.

"_**Well I think that in the situation I have a right to! That coupled with the fact that I'm actually thinking about this unlike you all gives me the right to actually speak."**_ The fur on her neck bristled. _If it weren't for Pein I wouldn't even be here with all these immature people!_ Konan thought then looked over to Pein with slits for eyes.

"_**I think it's her 'time',"**_ Hidan whispered to Kisame who nodded.

Konan sweat dropped. _**"Usually I'm not one to talk about these things but apparently you all don't know anything about animals."**_

"_**What do you mean?"**_ Kisame said.

"_**If it really was, as you put it, 'my time' then not one of you would be able to keep it in your pants—er fur!"**_ Konan said with finality before going over to Abby's bed, jumping up and sitting with her on the bed. They were both girls and she wanted to escape the idiocy that is the male species.

**(A/N: I don't know if that is true but it works for comedy reasons and also I'm not sexist it's just that Konan's always around guys like them sooooo can you blame her for thinking all men are bakas? Thought not. ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY! Even in my A/N's I do it!) **

"Oh hello Princess," Abby said as she petted her head before going back to her work.

The males only stood there staring at the bed. Every single one of them felt awkward at the moment.

Two hours past before Abby decided that she was done with writing the chapters she had and thought she should get ready for bed.

She got up and went over to her drawers to pull out some pj's and underwear which stayed hidden from the males by some sort of miracle.

"I'm taking a shower now kitties. No peaking," she wiggled her finger at them while saying this, "Princess here will make sure that you all don't look, ne Princess?"

Konan nodded her head and stared at the males with a death glare.

"_**Kiss up,"**_ Zetsu said.

"_**No it gives me a reason to kill you if you get too close, duh."**_ She replied. Konan had a feeling that her and Abby would get along fairly well.

"_**You do know that the girl was kidding right?"**_ Hidan said.

"_**Yes but I know that some of you really would try to look."**_ She replied.

Some of them snickered at that but Konan hissed and they shut up.

Abby went in and came out fully dressed in her pj's after a nice hot shower. "You all didn't think that I'd get dressed in here right after we met did you? How scandalous." She said in mock horror before laughing. "Well I'm going to bed. Heh the good thing about my hair is that I don't have to do anything to it after taking a shower. Well goodnight kitties!"

With that she turned off her light and crawled into her bed. The room was lit with a soft blue though from a nightlight she had. It was one of those that you put in that have vapor strips that dissolve for when you're sick. She liked the nice blue light so she just kept it in.

Before long Konan was fed up with the Akatsuki and went up with Abby and slept right next to her while the others quietly found places to sleep and used the litter box in the darkness. It was much better since the box was in the bathroom and the others couldn't see while you used it. Just like and actual bathroom.

* * *

WHOOT CHAPTER FOUR DONE! Ok the thing with the songs and fanfiction things… Well that's just for comedy reasons later and for lovey dovey stuff later as well XD.

**Itachi**: Why do you want me to die?

I don't. It's just funny REVIEW PEOPLE PLEASE!! TELL ME IF THIS IS BAD OR GOOD OR WHATEVER!! HEH!


	5. Chapter 5

**Me**: Yay chapter five!!!

**Deidara**: Yay?

**Me**: Oh just shut it!! No one cares for your negativity!!!

**Deidara**: o.e"

**Me**: XD I'm loved aren't I?

**Deidara**: -.-

**Me**: Hey guys I've finally made the little story thing with things like these authors notes in them!!! Go check it out! It's not that bad I think… I mean they could at least get a little bit of a chuckle out of you… I'm just saying XD

**Hidan**: NO ADVERTISING!

**Me**: DX You're all so mean!!!

**Gaara**: Tch

**Me**: o.o OMFJ GAARA!!!!!!!!1

**Gaara**: o.o… -.- shit

**Me**: *Glomps him*

**Itachi**: …?

**Me**: If you read my rambles then you'd know that I'm having another… wait for it...! GAARA PHASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Gaara**: Kill me -.-

**Me**: Oh just shut up Gaara I'm not going to kill you! O.O I just realized… I've never really done a disclaimer on here!

**Hidan**: Well aren't you smart?

**Me**: Gaara can you do it for me please??

**Gaara**: *sigh* fine! She does not own Naruto and/or the songs in this fanfiction.

**Me**: Why do we need disclaimers in _fanficions_?

**Deidara**: Beats me…

**Me**: Meh whatever… ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111(One)111111 ;D

* * *

"You're positive that you'll be fine while we're gone?"

"Yes mother I'm positive I will be just fine while you all are gone!"

"Well we don't have to go if—"

"No! You already paid for the tickets and everything and I'm telling you; I'll be just fine!"

Abby's parents were—finally—leaving for their trip, but as usual her mother kept thinking she was still the little kid that couldn't be left at home alone for one night.

They had all their bags in the car and had made sure that they had everything. All that was left was for her mother to get into the car and leave on their two month long vacation.

Abby was practically pushing her mother into the car. She couldn't wait to have to house all to herself and also; her parents had no idea that she had invited her friends over. She told her friends to text her before they got there and Alex was to be over at least half an hour after her parents were to leave, but you could never be too careful right?

"Mom, I'm telling you I'll be fine! You left me enough money to feed an army for two _years_ not two months and I'm _fifteen_! Plus me and Alex already agreed that she'll drive me everywhere! She is sixteen and can drive! I think I can take care of myself, don't you?"

Her mother looked her deep in the eye before nodding, "Alright, it's just that you've never even been home alone for one night and—"

"Mom leave already! If you don't then the ship will leave without you!!"

With that Abby hugged and kissed her parents goodbye one more time before they sped off. She waved until she couldn't see them anymore.

Her parents had promised that they'd call her once they got in and settled on the ship and once they were in Hawaii, since it was still a part of the U.S.

She headed back inside and went right over to her room, opened the door and let the Akatsuki out of her room for the first time. Her dad hadn't let her do it before but she knew that they wouldn't hurt anything. They _had_ been in her room for the past week and the only reason you could tell that cats had been in there was the fact that her room now had a cat fur blanket covering everything—that and the smell of the litter box.

"Ok guys you're now free to roam the house! Have fun and don't break anything," she said as she made her way into her room. The past week with her new pets had been very interesting.

Whenever she talked about her fanfictions George—Itachi—would pretty much have a heart attack while everyone else would act as if they were laughing. Then there was when she took a shower. When she'd walk back into her room to change Princess—Konan—would be the only one to even glance at her. All the others wouldn't even look at her or Princess would hiss at them before they turned back around.

Though Abby did find it funny when they found her Sasuke plushie and George once again almost had a heart attack. All of them would poke it with their paws before flinching back as if it would attack them. Abby only wrote it off as a normal cat act.

Though that was nothing compared to when she mentioned that she wanted to read a good Sasori and Deidara fanfiction, but couldn't find one. Blondie and Drizzit—Deidara and Sasori—wouldn't even look at each other and pretty much had seizures after she said that.

The poor cats went through pure torture while there; Abby had no clue that one Naruto related sentence sent them into either seizures or laughing fits. Then again, how could she know that she was housing S-class criminals?

Once they got out of her room they started to explore the rest of the house. Since they already saw TV's and a laptop in her room and went into the bathroom, there wasn't much that was new to them. At least until they went into the kitchen and discovered stoves, microwaves, dishwashers, and refrigerators. They decided not to even bother to know what all those things did.

The only real trouble was when Hidan found the knives.

"_**Lord Jashin may require precise rituals, but I think he could make an exception in this case. I haven't made a sacrifice in at least a week. He is definitely pissed."**_ Hidan said as he walked toward the knives.

"_**Hidan, don't go anywhere near anything sharp!"**_ Kakuzu yelled at him.

Hidan whirled around at him, _**"Who are you to tell me what to do?"**_

"_**Hidan,"**_ Pein said in a very eerie calm voice, _**"Don't kill anyone."**_

"_**Tch whatever,"**_ Hidan said as he jumped down from the counter and away from the knives. _**"Lord Jashin will definitely be pissed at me."**_

Itachi only rolled his eyes at the scene in front of him and made his way over to the sliding glass door that lead to the outside world.

They all had been kept inside for a week straight. That wasn't good for a shinobi, but the girl and her parents hadn't let them outside and they were all pretty cranky because of it.

"What are you doing there, George?" Abby came up behind him and he whipped his head around to stare at her. She sighed, "You know that I wish I could let you out."

Itachi gave her a look of yeah-right-you-just-want-us-to-rot-in-here-for-all-eternity.

"Hey don't give me that look! I don't want you to rot for eternity!"

Itachi was surprised that she seemed to have understood him. He gave her another look that seemed to say well-then-why-won't-you-let-us-out-of-here?

"It's creepy that I can pretty much read your facial expression, but the reason is because I don't want you all to run away right after I got you! My parents would kill me!!"

Itachi only looked at her, facially saying we-won't-run-away-because-we-have-no-where-to-go-duh.

"Oh please you lived outside for who knows how long!"

Itachi's look said we-couldn't-last-one-minute-out-there-on-our-own-as-cats.

"Well…" Abby considered maybe letting them out just once. _Our yard is pretty fenced in. It's not like they could get away with me watching them…_ "Alright. CATS GET YOUR CAT BUTTS OVER HERE NOW!" She yelled and the Akatsuki came and sat in front of her. "Ok well I've decided that you've all been in here for far too long. I'll let you all go out into the yard!"

It was silent for a few minutes until, _**"FINALLY! I'VE BEEN DYING IN HERE! I CANT STAY INSIDE FOR SO LONG!"**_ Hidan roared.

Abby took that as her cue to go over to the sliding glass door, unlock it, and once she opened it they all ran outside. "Heh, wow guess they really did miss it outside…"

"_**Finally! We've been cooped up in there for far too long."**_ Hidan stated.

"_**It's good to be outside. I've been stuck with a psychotic religious freak for too long!"**_ Kakuzu said.

"_**What was that?"**_ Hidan turned on him.

"_**Nothing, just that being stuck with someone like you for a week can be very tiring," **_Kakuzu said as he stretched.

"_**What the hell is that supposed to mean?"**_ Hidan roared.

"_**Just that being with someone who follows one of the most ridiculous religions ever is very tiring."**_

Hidan unsheathed his claws, _**"Mind saying that again?"**_

"_**What? That you're religion is screwed up?"**_

Kakuzu didn't know what hit him as Hidan launched himself at him. _**"No one insults Lord Jashin in front of me!" **_He said as him and Kakuzu rolled in the grass, fur flying and caterwauls echoing throughout the backyard.

Pein noticed this and came running over, _**"Stop this right now you two!"**_ But neither let up the fight. The rest of them came over trying to get them off each other, but only ended up getting dirt on them too.

Abby noticed this and her eyes grew wide. She ran over to them, "Oi! Both of you stop that right now!" When she got there she pulled Hidan off of Kakuzu. "No fighting you two! I should just get you two fixed so you don't fight!"

Both their faces were confused so she clarified, "That means they cut off your…thing…and you can't reproduce! Nor do you even feel the urge to!"

Now their faces went shocked as they hung their heads.

"Well now you're all covered in dirt!" Abby said. "Dammit I really don't have time for this, but I'm going to have to give you all baths."

They all froze.

"Oh no you all don't! I know cats hate water but don't worry!! It's not gonna kill ya." She said and smiled. "Now come on inside you all."

"_**Leader-sama…"**_ Sasori said.

"_**Yeah,"**_ Pein replied, _**"I know…"**_

"_**What should we do, hm?"**_ Deidara said as Abby went to grab them.

"_**Don't fight her! We can't hurt her!"**_ Pein said.

Abby picked up Hidan, Kakuzu, and Konan as Kisame said, _**"Well then what do we do?? We can't get wet with hot water!"**_

"_**Well who ever said that the bath would even be hot water?!"**_ Pein replied and it was true. In their world not many baths were hot unless you were living like the Hyuugas. Pein didn't think that she had hot water for baths. Would you think she did if you were in his place? No I didn't think so!

"_**That is true,"**_ Itachi said.

"_**So let's just get this over with,"**_ Pein said annoyed.

They all nodded and let her bring them into the bathroom. "Ok you all stay here while I go get some towels and some shampoo that we never use." Abby said.

With that she turned the water on hot and left to let it fill while she got the bath stuff. She returned a few minutes later to see all the cats as far from the tub as possible—they were still afraid it was hot.

"Oh just stop that you all! You'll be in and done before you know it!"

And with that she picked them all up **(A/N: Don't ask how the hell I'd be able to pick up nine cats at once—one being Kisame!!! Oh btw I'm listening to Kenny Chesney while writing this XD Just thought you'd wanna know XD**) and dumped them into hot water and was blinded with smoke with a loud 'poof' sound.

**Abby POV**

_Whoa what the hell is with the smoke???_ I thought. I only put the cats into the tub and there was a sudden noise that sounded like a poof and then a bunch of smoke.

I soon got my answer.

Once the smoke cleared and I'd stopped coughing I noticed that my nine cats weren't in the tub anymore, but nine _bodies_. Naked bodies on top of that!

"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL??" I yelled.

That's when the smoke cleared even more and I saw the most amazing thing ever. There was one blue body, then one that had long blonde yellow hair and something looking like a mouth on his chest, a red head with piercings on his face, and one that was a plant. Half his body was white and the other black.

I knew who these people were.

I stared in awe at them as they stared right back at me.

I took in a deep breath and let it out, "!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1" I let out in one of the highest pitched voices I've ever used in my life. "OH MY FUCKING JASHIN YOU'RE—NO YOU CANT BE—BUT YOU ARE!!!!" I said as I pointed a finger at them and screamed, "OH MY FUCKING JASHIN!!! THE FUCKING AKATSUKI ARE IN MY FUCKING HOUSE OH MY FUCKING JASHIN!!!!!!!!!" That's when I remembered, "AHHHH AND YOU'RE ALL NAKED!!!" I said before looking for a moment longer—can you blame me?—then running out of the bathroom and slamming the door behind me.** (A/N: Let us all imagine naked Akatsuki shall we? MWAHAHAHHA!!!)**

_What the hell just happened??_ I thought as I stood against the door breathing fast and shallowly.

That's when I heard another scream but not as loud as mine and I realized: _Oh shit Konan's in there with a bunch of naked guys!!_

At that I opened the door and rapidly searched for her. Once I spotted her I grabbed her arm and yanked her out of the room. I tried my best not to look at them but my eyes just didn't listen and I glanced over to Deidara and blushed the deepest red ever.

Once outside with the door closed Konan spoke, "Thank you, but why did you do that?"

I looked at her face—guys reading this get your minds outta the gutter!!—and replied, "You're the only girl in there with a bunch of naked S-class criminals and you're nude as well… And I really like Princess so…"

Konan only nodded.

"Go into my room and look for some clothes you can wear ok?" I said in a serious tone.

I knew that it was very sudden to be telling her to do this and such, but I've pretty much been with her for a week, and I really did like Princess. Plus no matter what girl it was I'd not wish that upon anyone. The poor girl probably won't be able to look any of them in the eye for weeks.

Konan nodded again and before she went into my room she turned to me again, "Thank you… Again."

I only nodded and urged her to go get some clothes. "I think you may fit into some of my clothes."

She looked over to the bathroom door before she left, "What about them?"

"I'll get them some towels to put on I guess…" I mumbled.

"Don't be scarred of them. They won't hurt you ok?"

I nodded. Konan went to change while I went to get six more towels.

I stood in front of the door before closing my eyes, opening the door, and throwing the towels into the bathroom yelling, "PUT THESE ON NOW!! I DON'T WANT NAKED GUYS RUNNING AROUND MY HOUSE!!" Then slammed the door shut.

I didn't even bother to tell them how to put the towels on. They were big boys they could manage by themselves! I blushed all over again remembering seeing _every single one of them_ after the…poof.

I sat down and waited for Konan to come back out. "Kami I love these types of fanfictions as much as the next girl but……what the hell are you supposed to do when it happens to you?" I wondered out loud.

"What do you mean?" I jumped at Konan's voice. I hadn't heard my door open at all…. AND I WAS RIGHT NEXT TO IT! _Oh wait… Ninja… Heh._

She stared at me for a moment before I sighed and said, "Look just get Pein to tell me how the hell you all got here and I'll tell you what I mean by that ok?"

She nodded and went over to the door and knocked on it, "Oi! You all decent yet??"

We stepped back as the door opened to reveal Pein…in a towel. I just blushed and looked away again.

Konan walked in but I hesitated. I was about to walk into a small room with an organization of killers! Minus Itachi of course…. **(A/N: Sorry if this contains spoilers for you! But that has to be added in for the fluff to occur!! Ok back to my mental break down!! ;D)**

"Come on," I looked up see Konan eyeing me softly; her voice just as soft. "Don't worry," She continued, "They won't hurt you."

I sighed, for some odd reason I trusted Konan's words. Maybe it's just because I've gotten so close to her cat form the past week. In any case I walked forward slowly only meeting the eyes of Konan. I didn't know how I'd handle seeing my favorite characters—Itachi and Deidara—in towels. All this blushing can't be good for my heart or my head.

Once I was in the room Konan spoke, "She wants to know how we got here." All was silent in the room and I could feel Pein eyeing me. "But in exchange, she'll tell us how she knows of us so well."

"Why should we fucking tell her anything? We could just threaten her to tell us how she knows of us!"

I knew that voice, it was Hidan. Cue blushing again, but then I realized what he said. I wasn't going to be pushed around by Hidan.

I looked up and looked him straight in the eye, "Listen here Mr. Immortal yall are living in my house under my rules. Not only that but now I know that you all were cats and turn human when doused in hot water, and on top of that I know that you all are here. No one else does! So unless you want me to turn you back into cats, tell the world about you, and lead fangirls worse than me to my house that will actually rape you, please just shut up, tell me how the hell you got here, and I might consider telling you how I know of you all." I huffed.

He only stared back at me and the rest of the room was silent. _Did… Did I just… say that?_

"What the hell do you mean by fangirls, hm?" I looked up to see it was Deidara who spoke and I once again fell into a blush that could match Sasori's hair.

"J-Just tell m-me how the hell y-you all g-got here and I'll tell you what I mean b-by that." I stuttered. Great now I sound like Hinata!

"Alright," Pein said. I breathed a sigh of relief. "Itachi would you please fill her in on how we got here? You're the one who knows it best, if at all."

I slowly turned my eyes to Itachi and the single towel wrapped around his waist and 'meeped'.

"Yes, Leader-sama," Itachi said, and he told me how a can with a jutsu seal on it was thrown into their hideout and released sending them here and how he thinks it was Konoha who did it. He went on to say that they had appeared in this world outside about a week ago when people came and took them somewhere where they were cleaned up and such. After he finished I only stared at them.

It took me sometime to find my voice but I found it eventually, "So a big black hole did appear out of nowhere, or you used to scroll to come here to take over this world, or even a random portal opened up in a puddle and you all stepped in it?" They all shook their heads. "Wow," I breathed out.

"It's your turn now," Pein said. I looked at him curiously. "Tell us how you know about us."

* * *

**Me**: Ok I would have made this a lot longer BUUUUT then it would have been like 5,000+ words where as this one's only 3,000+. But you know if I get enough reviews… I could post the next one _this week_. Would you all like that?

**Itachilver**: YESH I WOULD!!!! I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE IN THIS CHAPTER!!!!!!!

**Me**: Sorry… You were but… Oh speaking of her, you should notice that her name has been changed to Alex… Yeah she wanted me to use her real name too (as in we both have our real names used XP).

**Itachilver**: yay! REVIEW I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I COME OVER!!!

**Me**: Patience is a virtue Alex

**Alex**: I DON'T HAVE VIRTUES!!

**Me**: o.o guess not, but remember! If you want the next chapter sometime this week, maybe on turkey day? Then REVIEW LIKE MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!!! Anonymous can review now!!! PLEASE REVIEW!!! tyvvvvvm


	6. Chapter 6

**Me**: OMFJ I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING SOONER!!!!!!!!!!111 I SWEAR I WORKED ON THIS RIGHT AFTER I POSTED THE OTHER CHAPTER!!!!! IT'S JUST THAT I HAD WRITERS BLOCK AND THEN ON THANKSGIVING I HAD AN ALLERGY ATTACK!!! THEN I WAS RECOUPERATING FRIDAY!!! So I finished today! Hey I promised you all another chapter this week… I sorta kept my promise didn't I? Well you all deserve it!! I got so many freaking reviews!!!

**Deidara**: JUST GET ON WITH IT!!!

**Me**: Meanie! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

_

* * *

_

Recap:

"_It's your turn now," Pein said. I looked at him curiously. "Tell us how you know about us."_

I sighed, "Even if I told you I still don't know how keen you'd be to actually listen and believe what I said."

"Girl, we were sent to a whole other world as cats, yeah. I think we can believe just about anything now, hm." Deidara said.

Cue glaring at the terrorist, "Ok well first off, it's Abby, not girl! And second, I still don't think that you'd believe me."

Now he was glaring right back at me, "Look here, _girl_, we are a band of murderers that include a shark, an immortal, a guy with five hearts, a guy that turned his own body into a puppet, and let's not forget," he held up his hand, "my specialty. Now please tell us that we can't believe what you have to tell us."

My eye twitched at him calling me _girl_ again. "Fine then!" I threw my arms up in the air. "I'll tell you, but be warned that what I'm about to tell you won't kill you, but what results from it."

"Stop being so cryptic and just tell us, hm."

"Ok but remember you asked for it!" I snickered, "Ok well there's this anime called _Naruto—"_

"That's the Kyuubi jinchuriki…" Itachi said.

I nodded, "Yes and that's what the series is called. It's just a show, and book, but point blank it's only a fictional story! As in fictional characters, as in you." I pointed at Deidara.

"What the hell?" Hidan said.

"Is she crazy? **Can we eat her?"** Zetsu asked.

"No Zetsu, but I think she is crazy." Kisame said.

"Oh this coming from the big fish?" I said.

His eye twitched, "What was that?"

I thought of something just then, "Heh, I've always wanted to do this," I started to sing,"I'm blue da-ba-de da-ba-di da-ba-de da-ba-di." I burst out into a fit of laughter while Kisame just stood there. I think one of the veins in his head would have burst.

"Enough of this!" Pein said. I immediately stopped laughing. He stared down at me for a minute before continuing, "What you're saying…how can that be true?"

I thought about it before just shrugging my shoulders, "Hey I don't have the slightest clue. I mean sure it's awesome that the Akatsuki are in my house, but I never thought it would actually happen! You all are supposed to be fictional! If anyone is to be surprised or thinking that this can't be happening, then it's be buddy."

He glared at me, "Yes but still… You watch the series?" Though I could still tell that him nor anyone of them believed me. He just wanted to know what I supposedly knew.

I nodded my head, "If I didn't then I'd really be freaking out over the fact that some of you look like aliens you know."

"True…" There was a long pause before he asked, "How much do you know about us?" And there it was. I knew he's ask that. _But why did he have to ask that??_ I thought. _How am I supposed to lie to these people?_

"W-Well I don't really know th-that much," I stuttered.

"You're lying," he said.

_Damn ninja body reading skills. _I cursed in my head.

"I'll ask again, how much do you know?" He repeated.

I thought about it for a minute. _How much should I tell him? How much should I know? I might as well tell them that I at least know that Tobi's going to be the next member once the next person dies…_ "Ok well I do know that Tobi isn't here. But… that's it. I haven't read far enough to know why you all want to tailed beasts…."

I knew Pein knew I knew more, but he didn't show it. "Alright," he said.

I nodded, "Speaking of Tobi… Where is that little ball of fun?"

"Tch him fun, un?" Deidara said.

I turned to him and laughed, "Yeah I guess you don't really like him do you?"

"He's an annoying little shit. I'm glad that he wasn't in the hideout when we came here."

"Oh you know that you love that little guy!" I teased.

Deidara's hands clenched into fists, "Tch like anyone could like that little—"

There was a loud poofing noise and the same white smoke filled the room as it did when the Akatsuki turned human again.

I figured that maybe they were turning back into cats… Like in Fruits Basket, only they'd be turning back into cats, and not humans.

But when the smoke cleared I saw that I still had the Akatsuki in human form, but in the middle of the room was another cat.

My eyes widened when I saw what it looked like. It looked almost exactly the same as Itachi when he was kitty-fied, the only difference being that this one had bits of orange on its face.

_Oh. Hell. No._ I thought, but what came out of my mouth was completely different, "NOOO! I CAN'T HAVE ANOTHER PERSON IN THIS HOUSE! NOOOO!"

"Would you shut up, un?!" Deidara said.

"Seriously girl! How the fuck can you honestly get your voice that high??!" Hidan remarked.

I only stared at the newest member to my screwed up little family. _Uchiha… Madara…_

**Well you, my dear friend, are screwed.**

I paused, _What… What the hell? Ok I did not just hear a voice in my head!_

**Oh now I feel hurt! I see you don't love me hmm?**

I had to refrain myself from screaming out loud. _Who… are… you…?_

**Well you know how Sakura has an inner?**

_Uhhh…_

**Well congrats, you now have one… ME!**

If I didn't have more important matters to attend to—Madara—then I would have argued with my 'inner' and denied it, but I needed to see if this really was who I thought it was. _Explanation for that later please…_

"Oi, you there?" I heard Kisame say. I looked over to him and just nodded. "Ok well what the hell was with that scream exactly?"

"Uhhhh," I didn't know what to say.

"Would you all just stop it?!" Konan screamed. We all looked over to her, "Can't one of you see that this is something that is very stressful for her?? How do you expect her to react when another person from our organization joins?? To jump around all happy like?"

The rest of them stared at her like she was crazy while I only mouthed a silent thank you to her. "Could someone please take that cat into the bathroom and see if it's Tobi or not?" I asked politely.

"I'll do it, hm," Deidara said as he reached for the cat. He picked him up and took him into the bathroom that still had a tub full of hot-ish water.

I followed right behind him. He may be scary, but I wanted to see Madara's face. I've only ever seen it in fanarts and such though I might have seen it when Tobi was explaining things to Sasuke.

Needless to say, when the smoke cleared and I saw a very _naked _and _masked_ Tobi, I flipped.

"WHAT THE HELL? THAT'S A TOTAL RIP OFF! I COME HERE TO SEE IF I CAN SEE TOBI'S FACE AND HE STILL HAS HIS MASK ON?? IS IT JUST LIKE GLUED TO HIS FACE? OR IS IT JUST APART OF HIM???!!" After my rant I left the bathroom to go sulk in my room—of course I forgot about the murderers and traitors in my room…

"Kuso," I said under my breath, "well congrats Abby, you wanted those fanfics to happen to you and guess what? They did, I hope you're happy." I ranted as I made my way over to the living room. They followed.

_Are they just a bunch of lost puppies that follow me everywhere?_

I sat down in the computer chair and sighed.

"What the hell have I gotten myself into??" I said, mostly to myself.

"Uhh where's Tobi? And who's the pretty lady?" Tobi said.

"If ya want and explanation ask one of them!!! I don't even want to know how the hell you got here right now!"

"Geez someone's PMSing aren't they?" Hidan bluntly said.

I glared over at him, "Hey Hidan have you ever read my flair bored? No? Well let me tell you what's on it! A little piece of flair that says, 'Will throw nearest object when pissed'!!!"

"So you are PMSing?"

I reached over for the remote and chucked it at his head. Direct hit!

"OW WHAT THE FUCKING HELL BITCH?! THAT FUCKING HURTS LIKE FUCKING HELL!!"

"Oh sorry I thought you loved pain…the noun not the person," I added the last part before laughing like a mad woman.

"I swear to Jashin I will kill you!!"

"Yeah, yeah. Silence, I KILL YOU! I've heard that before!" That only sent me into a nother flurry of laughs. I loved Jeff Dunham. Just thinking his name made me laugh. "LOLZ! Jeff-fa-fa… DUN HAM!"

"Yup she's crazy, hm." Deidara said.

"No doubt about it," Sasori said.

"Tobi's scared of the crazy lady!!!"

My eye twitched, "What did all just call me??" I said in a calm voice.

"Crazy, yeah. Why? What are you going to do about—"

Before he could finish I had already grabbed the lamp and was running toward my prey ready for the kill.

"WHOA WHAT THE FUCK?? SHE IS CRAZY!!" Deidara yelled as he ran away from me and my lamp of DOOOM!!

Before I could go any further I felt a hand on my shoulder. I was about to beat the person senseless when I saw it was only Konan. She gestured over to Pein who was looking royally cheesed right now.

"Eh heh, heh, heh, gomen Pein…but DeiDei-kun started it!" I whined and pointed to said blond terrorist.

"Eh? What the hell is with the nicknames brat?!" Deidara said.

"What's with them is that I like them!!! You live here in my house so just live with it!"

"Leader-sama can I please kill her?"

"Not before me blondie!" Hidan said.

I 'meeped' and ran for my room. I ran in and closed the door. _Geez they'll kill me if Alex doesn't first for me… not… telling… her about…… this……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………_ "OH SHIT!! ALEX! SHIT DAMMIT SON OF A BITCH NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!111" I yelled and ran over to where my phone was on my nightstand. I flipped it open to see I had a text from said best friend.

I opened it: _ello well I'm gona b a bit early mmmk? Srry but my mom's schedule and such…. course ur parents will b fine wit it if they r still home right? Well anyhoo! B there in a few!_

I read the message twice just to make sure… yup she was gonna be here early. Which means less time for me to come up with a way to break all of this to her easily.

I was so lost in thought I didn't hear my door open, nor know someone was in my room until, "What's all the screaming about, un?"

I screamed again and turned around to see Deidara standing at the foot of my bed—which I was currently sitting on. "What the hell don't sneak up on me like that dude! What are you doing in here anyways?"

He narrowed his eyes, "Since I'm the one who made you flip out there and started the death threats they sent me in here to see why the hell you're screaming. So, as I said earlier, why the hell are you screaming?"

That brought me back to my problem, "Shiiiiiiiiiit! Dei-kun you can just kill me now… Please put me out of my misery!"

He didn't even hesitate before saying , "Ok, hm," and walking forward to kill me.

"Eeeep!" I squeaked and dodged his hand before it made contact with my neck to strangle me.

"C'mon make up your mind, yeah! Do you want me to kill you or not?"

"Uhh I don't really know actually, heh…. Were you really gonna kill me?" I hesitantly asked.

He chuckled, "Leader-sama wouldn't let me live if I killed you."

"What do you mean by that?"

"We don't know this world, so killing the only person that knows about us and won't kill us in turn wouldn't sit well with him, yeah."

"Oh, ok then… THAT DOESN'T HELP ME THOUGH!!"

"Would please not yell when I'm only a foot away from you?!"

That's when I realized how close he was. IN A TOWEL! My eyes couldn't help but go down—don't you pervs be thinking what I know you're thinking!—to stare at his pale, bare chest. **(A/N: ok raise your hand if you thought that her eyes were gonna go lower! I don't see you're hand raised Alex!! There we go! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111)**

I blushed a little, but before he could notice, I ripped my eyes away and said, "Uh gomen Deidara, I just don't really know what I'll do when Alex comes."

If he noticed my blush, he didn't show it, "Well what's so bad about that?"

I laughed, "Well one she's likes the show just as much as me, and we both love the Akatsuki, so she'll be attacking Itachi. Not only that but she may try to attack Pein, and then me for not telling her about this right when I found out…"

"You haven't attacked anyone Itachi or Leader-sama, un."

"Well that's because I know that if I did you all would kill me, and though they are both some of my favorite characters, they aren't my favorites in the Akatsuki." I laughed.

"Oh? Well who is your favorite person, hm?"

I stopped laughing and looked at my bed, which was very interesting at the moment. "W-Well, uh, you see—"

_Honk, honk, honk._ I heard from outside.

**Lucky, saved by the car, huh?**

_I'm not hearing things in my head, but true, thank you Alex!_ I sent a silent prayer to her and smirked at Deidara, "Guess you'll have to find out later, huh?"

I got up from the bed and walked towards the door and heard from behind me, "Yeah, I guess I will find out later."

I could hear the smirk in his voice as I made my way to the door quickly. Alex would surely just barge in without bothering to knock.

I opened the door just as she was coming up to it and closed it right behind me. Didn't want her to see them before I prepared her.

"Abby!" She said as she dropped her stuff and ran to engulf me and a super-Alex-glomp.

"A-Alex, can't b-breathe!!" I gasped for air. She let go immediately, "Geez Alex! I saw you yesterday at school!"

"I know but now we'll be living together till your parents get back and I'm excited!! Aren't you??"

"Heh you have no idea," My parents had talked to Alex's mom and they had agreed that since I couldn't drive and she could, and that I'd be very alone while they were gone, and I was responsible, Alex could stay with me until they got back. I was only fifteen, but was sixteen so she could drive me to school and etcetera. Plus I was such a goody two shoes that I'd make sure not to get knocked up at a party I threw while they were gone…

"So can I come in or are we going to live on your front porch?" Alex asked, trying to push though me to get inside.

"ALEX NO WAIT!" I yelled, even though I only wanted it to come out as normal talk…

"What? Is there a rabid fangirl in there or something?" She asked.

"Not yet there isn't."

"Huh?"

"Alex listen to me, this is serious. I found this out only about twenty minutes ago, but, well, you know the cats that I got?" She nodded, "Well, I don't really know how to put it so, just come in and see for yourself."

With that she got her stuff, I opened the door and we walked in to see the Akatsuki lounging about in my living room, all but Konan in a towel.

"Uh Abby why are there cosplayers in your house?"

I slapped my forehead, "Alex they aren't cosplayers! They're the real thing!"

She laughed, "Oh yeah and I was just at a party with Inuyasha and Sesshomaru!" She continued laughing.

"Alex seriously! This is real! I'm not lying."

"Oh is that true?"

"Alex when have I ever lied to you?"

She thought for a moment, "Abby they can't be the real thing!"

"Are you calling me a liar??"

"No I'm saying that you really want them to be real."

"But they are real!"

"Then prove it! Show me proof!!"

"Oh you want proof?"

"Yes please, prove to me that these cosplayers really are the Akatsuki."

I thought of a way to prove it when I went over to Deidara, grabbed his hand and held it so that his palm was facing Alex, "You want proof? YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE PROOF!!"

On cue the mouth opened to reveal one of Deidara's four mouths.

"AHHHH!!!!!!!!" Alex screamed almost as much as I did. "WHAT THE HELL?! THAT CAN'T BE!! NARUTO'S FICTIONAL! THAT CAN'T BE! LIES! LIES I SAY! IT'S CAKE! AHHHHH!!!!!111"

"Alex it's real! Just calm down!" I tried to soothe her.

"What the… How did this happen?!!"

"Well you know the cats I had?" She nodded, "And you know Ranma and Fruits Basket?" Another nod, "Well mix those together along with the Akatsuki and you get this."

"You mean they had a jutsu placed on them so that they traveled to our world as cats and when doused with hot water they turn human and when doused with cold they turn back into cats???"

I nodded this time.

"Can she read your mind or something?" Hidan asked.

"No, she just put two and two together."

"Uh, Abby?" Deidara said.

"Huh? What is it?"

"Can I have my hand back, yeah?"

I looked down to see that I was still holding his hand from earlier. I quickly let go of it and turned to Alex just in time to see that she was eyeing Itachi like a fangirl eyes her obsession… Ok so that's exactly what was happening.

* * *

**Me**: Lolz well it took me about three tries but I finally got it the way I wanted it!!

**Alex**: YAY I'M FINALLY IN IT!!! But no much _

**Me**: Sorry!! Once again it got to be very long!

**Alex**: As long as I'm in the next one a lot!

**Me**: ^v^ You will be… Hit that little button down there please??? Reviews give me life!!! Oh and to the person who told me to use the one line… I worked it in!! I'm sooo sorry for not sayin you name but I forget these things sooo much and I'm just way too lazy… Is it something like FanFictionLover or something? Probably not but hey I tried XD

Review for the next chapter!!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Me**: -.-….I know, I know you all want to kill me for not updating in, well, forever. BUT I REALLY DO HAVE A GOOD REASON!!

**Deidara**: Sure you do.

**Me**: *Gibbs Slaps* SHUT IT! NOT IN THE MOOD!

**Dei**: WTF WAS THAT FOR???

**Me**: Heh I'm watching NCIS and you pissed me off! Anyways! The reason that I haven't updated in forever is because….I GOT GROUNDED!!!

**Hidan**: That's it?

**Me**: I couldn't use the computer!

**Hidan**: WTF did you do??

**Me**: . Well ummm…I didn't do my chores….

**Hidan** **and** **Dei**: -.- That's it?

**Me**: YUP! OH AND!!!!!! Umm I'm really sorry to do this to you all but, well, I have shit loads of work from school now…and well updates will be very shorter……maybe weekly or so…. If you don't like it KILL MY TEACHERS! IT'S THEIR FAULTS!!! *Hint, hint, nudge, nudge*

**Hidan**: They can't kill your teachers

**Me**: Sure they can! They just need a pipe!

**Dei**: . They aren't killing people got it??

**Me**: Awwww why???

**Itachi**: Just get to the story!

**Me**: Fine…MEANIES! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_

* * *

_

Recap:

_I looked down to see that I was still holding his hand from earlier. I quickly let go of it and turned to Alex just in time to see that she was eyeing Itachi like a fangirl eyes her obsession… Ok so that's exactly what was happening._

* * *

I ran towards her as fast as I could, but I was too late. She had already taken off towards Itachi. Just like a predator attacking its prey…at least she wouldn't eat Itachi. I hope.

"Alex!" I ran away from Deidara and towards Alex, but she already had Itachi in her Mega Awesome Alex Glomp Of DOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"What the hell?!" Itachi said as Alex landed on him, but since he had mega awesome ninja skills he didn't fall. "Get her off of me!"

"Alex get off of the murderer!!" I yelled at her while trying to get her off.

She didn't hear me through her fangirling though… "OMFG ITACHI YOU REALLY ARE HERE IN OUR WORLD!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ABBY WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME SOONER??!! THIS IS SOO EPIC!! OMFGOMFGOMFGOMFG!!!!!!!!!!"

"Yes Alex it's epic now GET OFF THE CRIMINAL!!"

Itachi and I struggled with Alex for at least five minutes. Whenever we got an arm off the other would tighten and when we got that one off the other would go back into place. Eventually we actually had to get Kisame to drag her off.

"Argh why did the fish have to go and drag me off!!??" She cried as we set her on the couch.

"Because it's not nice to glomp someone that you just met for that long!!" I wagged my finger at her like she was a little kid doing something they shouldn't.

She just huffed, "Whatever. Why didn't you tell me???"

I laughed, "I told them you'd kill since I didn't tell you _twenty minutes ago_ when I first found out for myself!"

Of course I didn't expect this to be a good reason in Alex's eyes, "You still could have texted me!!" See what I mean?

"I couldn't text you because I was too busy freaking out over the fact that I had a bunch of nude criminals in my bathroom!!" I yelled.

Alex seemed to be processing this information. After a few seconds she broke into an evil grin. "So you pretty much saw _everyone_ like that…?"

I immediately knew what she was getting at and the image of the whole bathroom thing flew through my mind. I think I looked like a tomato again…

"HA I KNEW IT! YOU SAW _HIM_ NUDE DIDN'T YOU!!?"

My eyes turned into saucers. _Would she really say who it was??_ "N-No I didn't! I was too busy uhhh…"

She laughed, "You so saw him!" Then her face turned serious, "But you didn't see…you know who…right??"

I knew she was talking about Itachi, "No Alex I kind of too busy looking at D—other things…"

She stood up, "We will definitely be talking about this later when the guys leave!"

"Guys?" I was now confused, "Alex I don't think that they're going to be going anywhere."

"What the hell are you kicking us out or something??" Hidan asked.

"There is no way I'm walking around this world with a bunch of half naked guys!" Konan almost shrieked.

"No, no, no! I didn't mean _you_ guys!" Alex said.

"Then who did you mean??" I asked.

"You forgot that your other best friends are coming over?"

I went pale, "Y-You mean…shit…"

"Who's coming, un?" Deidara asked.

I could feel my eye twitching. "So Mason and Chris are going to walk in on us pretty much having a glomping party with half nude Akatsuki?"

Alex let out a giggle, "Yup."

To her this was all going to be hilarious. Chris and Mason would probably flip when they saw my house guests. That was probably what Alex was laughing about. But from my perspective it was totally different…I'd have way too many people in this house… Not to mention the fact that even though Mason watches Naruto and Chris used to watch it, they both hate it when Alex and I go on and on about the Akatsuki. Ever since we learned the truth about Itachi and knew everyone else's names we fell in love with almost all of them. So you could probably tell that they hated our fangirly-ness, especially when we talked about the guys we really do like.

Chris would never admit it but we can all tell that he likes Alex **(A/N: ALEX I SWEAR THIS ISN'T REALLY TRUE IT JUST GOES WITH THE PLOT LINE!!! WELL NOT REALLY BUT IT'D MAKE FOR SOME FUNNY STUFF I GUESS!! DO NOT KILL ME ALEX!! *GETS SHOT BY ALES* -.- Gee thanks…)**. So whenever she talks about Itachi Chris'll try to change the subject but if I'm there, we just ramble on, but if she talks at all about how hot she thinks he is or how much she wished he was real, Chris would pretty much just leave. He knows that he wouldn't be able to stop her talking then, and if he says anything bad about Itachi while Alex is in one of her I-love-Itachi moods, he'll die.

It's pretty much the same thing with me and Mason, though since I am actually dating him…I can usually only gush over my Dei-kun with Alex, though I'll usually do it whenever I'm mad at Mason or if I just want to annoy him to no end. Of course if I even talk about how hot he really is, Mason gets extremely mad and doesn't have anything against flat out criticizing Deidara right to my face. I figure that he's just jealous that I not only like him, but a fictional—well _used to be_ fictional—character. Saying that I'd rape him if he was real probably doesn't help my case much though…

Point blank, Chris and Mason are going to freak when they come over and see our reasons for living in my living room half nude.

**They really need to be fully nude…**

_Ok fine I accept that I'm schizophrenic! But could please just not be so…pervy??!_

**I'm only your inner most thoughts…what I'm saying is allll you girl!**

_Well then maybe I should just kill you!_

**YOU'RE SUICIDAL??**

I innerly sweat dropped, _Just leave me alone while I try to think!_

**Fine, fine…**

"Why would it be so bad if your friends came over?" Konan asked.

I groaned, "Well for you all it'd be more people knowing of your existence, and for me…they might just kill me and Alex…"

Alex stopped her laughing—which was still going on—to look over at me, "What do you mean both of us??"

"Chris would totally kill either you or Weasel-kun over there." I pointed to Itachi who twitched while Kisame roared with laughter.

Alex rolled her eyes, "Oh please he doesn't have any reason to kill me!"

"Uhhh yeah he does. He likes you and has been trying to get you to like him all year and part of last year! He's so going to kill you."

"Well at least I'm not dating him!" There was an inner meaning to that, I could tell.

I laughed, "Well because I'm dating him he shouldn't have any reason to worry!"

Alex twitched, "It's called cheating! Duh!"

I glared, "It's called I-wouldn't-cheat-on-my-first-boyfriend!"

Alex huffed and gave up. I win. I did a little happy dance in my head.

"Well when the hell are they coming?" Hidan asked.

"Tobi wants to make new friends!" Gee I wonder who said that…

I laughed at Tobi, "You will Tobi, don't worry."

Tobi kind of inched away from me though.

"Huh? Is he ok?"

"When he turned human you yelled at him, hm. So he doesn't really like you right now." Deidara said.

"OMGOMGOMGOMG IT'S THE MOUTH!!!" With that Alex was right in front of Deidara poking the stitching keeping the mouth on his chest closed.

Deidara only looked at her like she was crazy, "Can I help you, yeah?"

Alex looked up from her poking only to grin at him, "Has Abby done this yet?"

I nearly fainted.

Deidara didn't know what to say but the look on his face must have given it away to Alex.

"No? Wow Abby I get to touch chesty first? You're so nice!" She mocked me.

I recovered enough to stomp over to her, pull her away from him, and plant her back on the couch, "Do you remember when they'll be here?" I growled out.

In between laughs she said, "They said they'd text you when they were heading out."

I remembered that I dropped my phone on my bed when Deidara scared the hell out of me after my outburst.

I ran into my room to check my phone. I had one new text from Mason. **(A/N: Well that message must be at least two weeks old by now… Heh get it? Cuz I didn't update…and……yeah…..never mind….) **I saw that it was sent about five minutes ago.

'_Hey we're leaving now, see you in a few XD'_

"Shit…" I walked back out to everyone, "Ok people, they'll be here soon. I don't want any of you to kill them!! No matter how annoying they are! Got it?!"

They all just stared at me.

"Konan can you please make them agree??"

Konan smiled and looked over to Pein, "Pein-sama…"

Pein nodded, "You are not permitted to kill them."

"Thank you Pein!" Alex said and I just laughed at all the peoples' shocked faces that she didn't call hi 'Leader' or add the suffix to his name.

"You know you really should lay down some rules for while they're here," Alex said. "You know, in case they want to kill someone or trash your house…"

I nodded, "Yeah true. OK YOU ALL LISTEN UP!!" Some of them had been in conversation with each other so they looked up to see what I was yelling about, "Ok so here are the rules!" I pointed to each of them as I said the rules, "One: no sacrifices (Pointing at Hidan)! Two: no eating people (Zetsu)! Three: no ninjutsu (Kisame and Itachi)! Four: don't steal my money (Kakuzu)! Five: don't kill anyone (Konan and Pein)! Six: Don't trash the house (Tobi)! And finally seven: Don't be. Seen. By. _Anyone!_ Is that clear you all?!"

They all nodded.

"Good, now that that's out of the way—"

_Diiiiiiiiiing dooooooooooooong!!!!!_

"They're here!!" Alex said and ran for the door.

"Alex no! Wait! I want to prepare them before they—"

But it was too late. Alex had already opened the door and there stood Mason and Chris, staring at the half naked Akatsuki.

"Welcome to the party guys!!" Alex said and pulled them inside.

I couldn't do anything. I was frozen in place. I had no clue what they were going to do…

"Abby…why are there cosplayers in your house?" Chris asked.

"And why are they half nude?" Mason asked.

"Well before you think any further, think of mine and Alex's personalities. Now think about the question: why in hell would we do what's going through you're perverted minds??!!!"

**Uhhh what's going through their minds??**

_They think that…well…there's a bunch of hot almost nude guys here! What do you think they think??_

**Pervs…**

"Ok then what is going on?" Mason asked.

"Well you see; the cats that she had were really the Akatsuki sent to this world through a jutsu that sends people to different worlds as cats and when doused with warm water they turn human and we think that when doused with cold, they turn back into cats, so I guess Abby got them into some hot water and when they turned back into cats they were naked and that's why they're all in towels besides Konan who used some of Abby's clothes because she didn't want to be half naked in front of a bunch of guys. Get it?" Alex said in one breath.

"Damn…" Chris said.

"Wait so these are the actual Akatsuki?" Mason asked.

I nodded.

"That's impossible."

I sighed, "DeiDei can I see your hand again?"

"Tch again?"

"Yes, again, now give me your hand!" I didn't even give him time to reply has I grabbed it again and held it up to show the guys.

Their faces went to surprise so I guess they saw the hand.

"Do you believe me now?" I asked as Deidara lowered his hand.

"Can I at least get my hand back this time, yeah?" Deidara said.

I blushed slightly but only said, "Well sorry for getting excited about showing Alex!" And then I dropped his hand. "There happy?!"

Deidara only 'tched.'

"What the hell happened before we came over??" Mason asked. Chris would have said something but he was too bust glaring at Itachi—typical. I was actually surprised that Mason wasn't glaring at Deidara, but whatever.

"Look nothing! They just turned into humans and I screamed my brains out!" I said.

"And she saw them naked!!!" Alex said.

I fell over anime style and my face heated up. "WELL YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL THEM THAT!!"

"Whoa wait, were you here too Alexis?" Chris asked.

Alex looked crestfallen, "No, I didn't get to get a nosebleed like Abby…"

I mumbled, "Stupid voice in my head got one…"

"Did you say something, un?" Deidara asked.

I froze and faked a smile, "What? Me? Talking? Saying something? Nope not me!" I said waving my hands in front of me, "Heh, heh, heh…"

They all only eyed me like I was crazy.

I sighed, "Look nothing happened! It was mostly me screaming about the fact that they're here and that you all were coming over… Ok?"

"Fine," the guys said at the same time.

It was all quiet for a few minutes as Alex stood between Chris and Itachi and I stood next to Deidara and Hidan staring in Mason's direction.

Of course Alex broke the silence, "Do they know about limes?"

I fell straight on my ass in between the two criminals laughing so hard my sides hurt and I was tearing up. I could hear Alex laughing just like me. I didn't stop laughing for ten minutes because whenever I'd stop I'd just think of how the Akatsuki would react if they knew about them. Cue continuous laughter for ten minutes.

After finally stopping I looked like I just cried my eyed out and I felt like I had the worst cramps of my life. I went and sat on the couch and let my sides rest.

"Tobi wants to know what limes are!" Tobi said.

Alex giggle, "Do you think we should tell him who he's with in his limes?"

I began to laugh, but then I just got disgusted and said, "Jashin no! You know I prefer his 'significant other' to be with…well you know…"

"Oh yeah you prefer Deidara and Sasori over Deidara and Tobi right?"

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Sasori and Deidara said at the same time.

I pointed a finger at Alex, "Yeah well you like Itachi and Deidara!!"

"WHY THE HELL AM I PUT WITH PEOPLE??? WHAT THE HELL?????" Deidara said.

"What is wrong with you people?!" Itachi said.

Alex and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Ita-kun, trust us; we definitely think you'd rather be with Deidara than _Sasuke_." Alex said.

Itachi nearly fainted at that.

"'Course he'd probably rather be with Sasuke than Kisame…" I said.

I think Itachi just died…

Kisame—who was laughing at Itachi—fell silent. What happens when a blue skinned man turns green? What color does that make? Hmmm….

"What the fuck is wrong with you all??" Hidan asked.

"Oh Hidan don't think we didn't forget about you!" I said.

"Yeah!"

"Oh Jashin I don't want to know!!!" Hidan said.

"Too late! HIDAN AND KAKUZU SITTING IN A TREE K-I-S-S-I-N-G! FIRST COMES LOVE THEN COMES MARRAGE THEN COMES AN IMMORTAL BABY WITH STITCHES AND FIVE HEARTS IN A BABY CARRAGE!!" Alex yelled.

I burst out laughing again.

"God you all and your yaoi…it's so wrong!" Chris said.

"It's not as bad as your yuri!" Alex said.

"Ok we are not starting this!!" I said before it could go any further. That's when I looked over to Hidan and Kakuzu to see that they both were emotionally scarred forever. "Oops sorry guys. We just kind of got off topic there didn't we?"

It was silent until someone once again broke it—the poor silence, it's always being broken, "What does Abby-chan and Alex-chan mean when they say Tobi and Senpai?"

Alex went over and hit him over the head, "Only Abby calls me Alex, Tobi. The rest of you call me Alexis! Ok?"

"Oh! Tobi's so sorry Alexis-chan!" Tobi said.

"Good boy Tobi!" Alex hugged him.

"But you still didn't answer Tobi's question!"

_Why would Madara even make Tobi ask that??_

**I don't know, but it's funny! Look at DeiDei!!**

I looked over to him and saw him pretty much smashing his head into the wall. "Deidara don't break my wall…..! Or your head!!!"

"Oh go ahead and let him break his head. I'll bet his hair would get in the way though," Mason said.

Deidara immediately stopped and turned around, "What did you say, hm?"

I mentally slapped myself. This wasn't going to be good. "Mason don't you dare even start with that! And Deidara! Don't start with him or so help me I'll make sure you don't go near any clay for as long as you are in this house!!"

**Gee **_**mom**_** I think they get it!**

_I do not sound motherly!_

"Damn what are you, my mother?" Deidara asked.

"She's mine and Chris's mommy!" Alex shouted.

"How the fuck does that work??" Hidan asked.

"Well we pretty much just elected her our mom. It was an interesting day…" Chris said.

"Yeah you all got into a food fight in my house and god cheese on cabinets, meat on the floor and everywhere else, and Alex spilled her milk all over the floor and part of the computer chair!!"

"What the hell?" Hidan asked.

"Yeah I have no idea! They were both just over for dinner and BAM they got into a food fight!" I said. **(A/N: This actually happened -.-)**

"Where the hell was I when this happened?!" Mason asked.

"I didn't know you then," I said back.

"Tobi still hasn't gotten an answer!" Tobi said.

"And I was yelling at Deidara!" Mason said.

"Bastard what the hell's wrong with my hair???" Deidara asked.

"Oh gee I wonder!" Mason said.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW! I DON'T WANT A FIGHT TO START IN THIS HOUSE GOT IT??" I yelled. I really didn't want a fight to start…. That wouldn't be fun at all!

"Bastard dissing my hair…doesn't even know…" Deidara was mumbling.

"Wouldn't have to diss it if it didn't look so gay…" Mason mumbled back.

I groaned, "Look you two! Mason only makes fun of it because he's jealous! That's it! And before you even think about it, no it's not your hair he's jealous of! Don't even ask what it is either! So Deidara just don't mind Mason and Mason shut up!"

It was quiet except for Mason and Deidara 'tching' and mumbling to themselves.

Course the silence had to be broken…AGAIN! "Tobi's still doesn't have his answer…"

_Damn he's persistent!_

"It means you and your 'senpai' were pretty much together! As in as a couple!! As in SEX!!" Alex yelled.

Tobi fainted.

* * *

**Me**: Poor Tobi!!

**Madara**: What the hell was that?

**Me**: o.o Well you see uhhh

**Alex**: REVIEW PEOPLE! PLEASE?

**Hidan**: Review or I'll sacrifice you to Jashin-sama!!!

**Me**: Well there you go! REVIEW!! XD


	8. Chapter 8

**Me**: I'M SO FUCKING SORRY! IK IK IK!!!!! LATE UPDATE!! BUT I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO UPDATE VERY QUICKLY NOW!!! Fucking school work + lazyness + _writers block_ = late updates!!!! SORRY SORRY SORRY!! GOMEN GOMEN GOMEN!!!!! WAAA!!

**Hidan**: JUST START!

**Me**: Why do you all insist on hurrying me? You all are just going to be even more scarred you know…

**Deidara**: You're annoying that's why!

**Me**: u.u I see…

**Alex**: Hey don't be mean! Bad Deidara and Hidan! No ninja snacks!!

**Both**: O.o

**Me**: Thanks Alex XD…and just for that…I SHALL SCAR YOUR CHARACTERS EVEN MORE!!! *Cue evil laughter and ominous lightning and such*

**Itachi**: She's crazy…

**Me**: RAWR!! But I would like to thank HidanxRai4ever for her idea! Thank you! It makes this even funnier XD…. I'M NOT CRAZY! O.o

**Alex**: *Sigh* ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D

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Recap:

"_It means you and your 'senpai' were pretty much together! As in as a couple!! As in SEX!!" Alex yelled._

_Tobi fainted._

* * *

"DID YOU REALLY HAVE TO SAY IT OUT LOUD LIKE THAT, HMM??" Deidara yelled.

"It's not like it's our faults that you all have fangirls that want you all to make out with each other!" Alex said.

"Well I only blame fangirls for getting me hooked. Now I'm happy that I love yaoi!" I said and broke out into a smile at all their faces. Poor guys…it's their faults for being hot though!

"Why the hell would they put Itachi with his own brother?!" Konan asked.

Alex, Chris, Mason, and I all cringed at that.

"I have no idea but I actually saw a picture of that once—don't give me that look Alex I was only looking up either Sasuke or Itachi flair and it popped up—and Holey Jashin it was horrible! The only guy Sasuke should be with is Naruto! And the only guy Itachi should be with is Deidara!" I said.

"So true," Alex said.

"You all are just sick," Mason said.

"Hey, that's not as sick as KakuTsu!" Alex said.

"Please tell that isn't what I think you're saying!!" I pleaded.

Alex nodded, "Yup Kakuzu and Tsunade!!"

"Fuck, Kakuzu just lost another heart!!" Hidan yelled.

"Oops…?" Alex said. "Well at least it isn't HidaKona!!"

"Are you seriously saying that people put Hidan and Konan together??" Mason asked.

Alex nodded.

"WHAT THE HELL?? I WOULD NEVER BE WITH THAT MASOCHIST!!" Konan yelled.

"And I'd never be with that uptight bitch!!" Hidan said.

"I would never go for that couple!" I said," The only couple that Konan should be in is PeinKona!"

Konan blushed and Pein stiffened.

"Are you fucking serious?" Hidan said, "Leader-sama and Konan?"

I nodded, "Yes actually it's a very popular couple because everyone who loves it believes that it could really happen!"

Konan stiffened but Alex and I could see the blush on her face—even though it was so small. I'm pretty sure that we were the only ones to notice.

I decided to put Pein out of his misery, "Oh! One more rule! No going outside!!"

"What? **Why the hell can't we go outside?**" Zetsu said.

"I'm guessing it's because, if we are as widely known throughout this world as these two say we are, then we can't risk people seeing us, right?" Pein said. I nodded.

"Tch we could take on anyone that even dared to try anything on us, hm!" Deidara said.

I went over and flicked Deidara in the head, "You all can't because some of the people that watch the show hate you and would try to kill you, in turn making you all kill them, which wouldn't be good at all…I don't want you all to kill innocent people here! And even if they do like you all they'd expose you all. If that were to happen then scientists would haul you away and the creator would probably be questioned. Point blank: it would cause chaos that we just can't handle right now! Right Pein-sama?"

Pein nodded while Deidara just flicked me in the head.

"Hey what was that for??" I snapped at him.

He smirked, "Don't flick me and I won't flick you."

"Hey that's my line!" Alex said.

I continued to glare until Kakuzu spoke, "Can we please get some clothes now??"

"The girl's father must have some clothes," Sasori said.

Wow these guys can change topic quicky….

I shook my head, "No he took all of it with him on the trip, and my name is _Abby_. Get it right puppet boy!!!"

Sasori twitched.

"He didn't take these though," Alex said coming out of the hallway with one of my dad's work shirts. Apparently when I was insulting Sasori she went in.

I sighed, "Yeah but he took all his shorts. So it'd only be good to cover their chests and not what really needs to be covered."

"I say we let them wear the shirts!" Chris said.

"I second that," Mason agreed.

Alex and I went over and flicked them in the heads.

"You all just wanna make it so that _we_ can't see anything!" Alex barked at them.

"Your point being?" Chris asked glaring at Alex then Itachi and back to Alex.

"Suits us just fine," Mason huffed while glaring at Deidara.

Alex and I both face palmed. If they were trying to hide their jealousy they were doing very badly.

"What the hell's your problem, yeah?! Why do you keep glaring at me??" Deidara snapped at Mason.

"I'd like to know the same thing about the other one," Itachi said.

"It's a free country we can glare at whoever we want to!!"Mason said.

"What the hell do you mean 'free country', hmm?" Deidara asked.

"In this country we are free to do certain things like bash our president—screw Bush!!!—and have whatever religion we want, etc, etc.!" I snapped at them. "Can we just get to getting you all clothed?!"

**I don't think that they really need clothes…**

_SHUT UP! THEY DO!!_

**Pfft you want to keep Deidara in his towel and you know it!**

I innerly twitched. _No, no, no, no, NO! I just want to get certain people—Kakuzu and Zetsu—in normal clothing!!_

**Ahh so only those two?**

_Shut up, or I swear to Jashin I will kill you!_

**It's not good to be suicidal you know!! Then Alex wouldn't have anyone to tell her not to rape Itachi…**

_Good point…. Wait…OFF TOPIC!_

"You're such a fun killer Abby!" Alex bounded over to me.

"Well pardon me for being a little creeped that a bunch of guys that are older than us are in my living room in towels! Some are even older than me and you combined!" I said.

Alex sighed, "Fine, but where are we going to get them clothes? I mean are you seriously going to buy each of them a full wardrobe?"

I thought about this for a minute…."No I was just thinking maybe two or three pairs of jeans for each of them—since jeans can be re-worn about three times before needing washed—and maybe buy them each four shirts and if they run out, they can use my dad's work ones…."

"That'd be a lot of laundry to do," Mason entered the conversation.

"No duh, baka." I snapped. He was annoying me with all his glaring at Deidara, and Chris was getting irritating glaring at Itachi.

"How would you even begin to get all that clothing washed?" Sasori asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean: hand washing about 50+ articles of clothing would take about a week, and then you'd have to spend the next one washing them all over again."

I giggled, "Oh poor naïve Pinocchio, we actually have technology here so I'd just stick some loads in the electric washing machine and drying machine. The only read problem is all the folding and actually remembering to get the crap from the washer to the dryer."

The Akatsuki looked at me confusedly. I only waved it off. If they wanted to know how it worked, they could just watch when I finally did the laundry…that is if we ever get around to buying anything.

"They can learn about technology later! You really need to get them some clothes now!" Chris said.

I groaned.

_Sure I'd only be buying them each only a few pieces of clothing…and each needs a pair of shoes…._

**That's a lot….**

_Really? I had no idea! _I glared at my inner.

**Hey no need to be snippy!**

_I can be snippy all I want! My brain! Now if you aren't going to help me, shut up, go into the back of my head, and don't come out until I have this resolved!!_

**Sheesh calm yourself woman! I am here to help you know.**

_Doesn't seem like it…._

**Ok now you need to shut up while I speak………..**

_Uh hello??_

**Sorry just had to make sure you wouldn't interrupt! Now! Our parents gave us enough money to feed an army for two years right? At least that's what you told our mom.**

_Yeah, and?_

**She wants us to use a lot of it right…?**

_I don't think I want to know where you're going with this…._

**Baka, just use the credit card to but shit!!**

_Damn I knew I didn't want to know! Even if I did, no matter where I go clothes will still cost a lot! I can't go spending a bunch of money like that!! Mom and dad would be too suspicious._

**Just go to JCpenny's and look for a sale! Wow we're using a lot of exclamation points aren't we…and dots?**

_Heh, yeah I guess so…. Back on topic…even there it would still be pretty bad once we bought…how many are we getting exactly?_

**Well, you said about four shirts per person right? Well we have: Deidara and Sasori, Itachi and Kisame, Hidan and Kakuzu, Zetsu and Tobi, and Pein…that's…nine because Konan can just borrow your and Alex's stuff. So four times nine is…can you get a calculator?**

_Oh come on! Don't tell me you can't do math!_

**I can! I'm just too lazy. XD**

_Four times nine is thirty-six!_

**Ok then, thirty-six shirts and how many pants?**

_I was thinking about getting them each about three or four pairs of jeans._

**No shorts?**

_If I want to see anything, I'd wanna see them shirtless, not with shorts! It just doesn't seem right to me…._

**Point taken. Ok so then that's thirty-six pairs of pants too. What's thirty-six times two?**

_Ugh aren't you the one that's supposed to do this entire math shit??_

**No now work!**

_Ugh! It's seventy-two! …Holy shit!!_

**Maybe three pairs each?**

_That would bring it up to…. Let's see here, nine times three is vingt-sept—_

**No French!!**

_Fine, fine! That would be twenty seven plus thirty-six which is sixty-three!_

**Not much of a change….**

_Ok well now we just need socks for shoes—no not converse, that is _way_ too expensive for nine people!—and…._

**BOXERS!!!**

_Oh how fun this will be (Sarcasm)! Ok well I'll get seven pairs of each for each guy._

**Seven?**

_If they are in this house they will wear clean underwear!_

**Wow you really are a mom! You're children should watch out…you'll hit them with a tennis racket.**

_Hey! Alex and Chris said that one time! I don't even know where they got that from!!_

**Continuing! Nine times fourteen—**

_Fourteen?_

**Yeah, seven pairs of socks, seven pairs of BOXERS!**

_You just love to torture me…._

**I do what I can. Anyhoo, nine times fourteen is…fuck.**

_What?_

**It's 126! And that plus sixty-three is…189…**

_Well damn. Hot damn…._

**Well you're going to go broke!!**

_Hmmm maybe not!_

**Huh?**

_I'll just go to a thrift store! Things there are only like five bucks a piece! Maybe even less on some…._

**Isn't that place for people in need?**

_Are you serious? WE ARE IN NEED!_

**To the thrift store then!**

_Right! Keep that number in our head ok?_

**Y-You finally said 'our'!! **My inner mock sobbed.

_What are we, a married couple?_

**Oh just get back to the people in your house!**

_Ugh why do I have to go back to the chaos??_

**Because Hidan's knocking very hard in our head and I'd very much like him to stop.**

And he was.

"Oi bitch! Did you fukcing die or something??" Hidan asked while almost beating my brains out.

"WHAT THE HELL DUDE?" I turned and accidentally hit him in the face. Oops?

"What the fuck bitch?! That fucking hurt!" Hidan said as he rubbed his bruising cheek.

My eyes as well as Alex's, Mason's, and Chris's went wide. I've never been able to hit! Anything! Once I tried to hit my friend in the head for pissing me off and I was about a foot off. Even if I had hit, I don't think I'd have done much damage…. Needless to say, I was happy right now.

"Hidan you're losing your touch. Especially if you can be caught off guard by a girl like her." Kakuzu said.

"Hey what's that supposed to—no you're right…. Wow I thought Hidan was supposed to be a big bad criminal. Guess not since I of all people even landed a hit! Making your cheek bruise even just a little like it is, is a feat in and of itself!" I said.

"What did you say—"

"AHHH ABBY HIT SOMETHING!! AND HURT IT!! AND IT WAS A NINJA!! AHHH!!! IT'S THE APACOLYPSE!!!" Alex cut off Hidan and ran over to Tobi—no I don't know why she ran to Tobi either—and glomped him while they both freaked out.

I crossed my arms, "Alright well I guess that I should get going," I got up from the couch.

"Going where exactly?" Mason asked.

"They need clothes so I need to go out and them those clothes. All 189 pieces, plus shoes."

"That's a lot of money…." Kakuzu said.

"How the hell are you going to pay for all that?" Chris said.

I grinned a sly grin and walked over to my kitchen, searched the counter, found my purse—when the fucking hell did I get a _**purse?**_—looked through it and found the little piece of plastic and brought if back to where everyone was. "This is how." Alex already knew about all the money on the card and I just waved off the boys' questions about why I was using my parents card.

"What's that?" Pein asked.

"I'll explain everything that you all want to know about this world later. Right now I need to get to a thrift store to buy your all's shit!" I said.

"How are you going to get there?" Alex asked, "You can't drive."

"Yes, but you and Mason can."

Mason and Alex were both older than Chris and I, and Chris was younger than me. Alex and Mason would always rub it in our faces that they could drive and we couldn't, though it did come in handy sometimes. Free rides to school!

"So you're going to leave the Akatsuki in your house alone? Well bye-bye Abby's house!!" Alex said.

"No," I snapped back, "I'm going to leave Chris and one of you two here with them!"

"What?? Why me?" Chris whined.

"Because if you go then only one person will be here because I still need someone to drive me there and as we covered earlier, you can't drive!!" I barked back.

"Are you really thinking of leaving Chris and Mason here by themselves with the Akatsuki?" Alex asked.

I knew that she just wanted to stay there as long as she could before I dragged her ass to school, but she still had a point. Without Alex or I there, Chris would probably attack Itachi, and then he'd be put into Itachi's Tsukiomi **(A/N: Did I spell that right?)**. Of course we can't forget that Mason would insult Deidara's masculinity and my house would be blown to pieces along with everyone in it…. At least Hidan could tell me what happened! Point blank: Mason was driving.

"Yeah you're right. Mason you're coming with me!!" With that I grabbed Mason by the arm and pulled him through the kitchen to get my dad's car keys for his truck and then ran out the door, but not before yelling at Chris, "MAKE SURE ALEX IS STILL A VIRGIN BY THE TIME I GET BACK!! AND YOU ALL BETTER REMEMBER THE RULES I LAYED DOWN EARLIER!!!!!"

Maybe letting Alex alone with all of them wasn't the best idea…. I pray to God my house is still there when I get back.

* * *

**Me**: Whew! It's done!!! Damn this was a hard one! I'm sooooo sorry if it didn't meet your standards!! Like I said up there I'm having major writers block!!

**Alex**: So to help with that, you all can send in some ideas.

**Me**: I may use them, and I may not, but I will consider every single one! Though I may change it around a little bit XD Especially if changing it would make it work in the story!

**Alex**: So just put your idea in your review! So in other words REVIEW! And we'll give you Itachi!!

**Itachi**: WHEN DID I BECOME A BARGANING TOOL???

**Me**: Fine! We'll give you Sesshomaru!!!

**Sesshy**: I'M NOT EVEN IN THIS SERIES!

**Alex**: Abby! He may be sexy as hell but we can't use someone from a different anime!!

**Me**: Fine…THEN I GET HIM!!

**Deidara**: WTF? What about me?? I though you like me ;_;

**Me**: I do! I just love Sesshy the most from his series!

**Inuyasha**: Hey it's my series!!

**Me**: O.O *Glomps Inu and Sesshy* REVIEW!!!


	9. Chapter 9

**Me**: Merry Christmas!!

**Hidan**: It isn't Christmas yet!!

**Me**: Well I don't know if I'll update before then!!!

**Deidara**: What about the people who don't celebrate Christmas?

**Hidan**: Yeah! I celebrate Jashinmas!! -.-

**Me**: Oh…HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Happy Hanukkah, we wish you a happy Kwanza and a happy new year! Good tidings we bring to you and your kin. We wish you a MERRYHAPPY CHRISTMAHANUKKWANSIKA!! And a happy new year!!!!!!!!!

**All**: O.o

**Me**: I love that XD _**IMPORTANT!!!!!**_ Due to recent classified events (I was abducted by aliens) I may not be able to update next week!

**Deidara**: She's going to her cousins' -.-

**Me**: Mhmm!! So I may not be able to type and shit!! I'll try my very best to get another chapter out this week, but I make no promises!!!

Oh and, PRAY FOR ME!! I love my cousins dearly but they're brother and sister and the brother…he yells and shit SO FUCKING MUCH!! Kami I told my mom I'll just slap him if they get into a fight! Or just scream at them…

**Hidan**: Just get on with it!! Just tell that that I'll come and sacrifice them to Jashin of they don't shut up!!

**Me**: I will do that!! I'll also be speaking Hidan-language!!

**All**: …?

**Me**: -.- I'll curse em out…

**All**: Ohhh!!!

**Me**: ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I listened to _Numa Numa_ and _Caramelldansen_ while writing and editing some of this!!!!!)

_

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_

Recap:

_Maybe letting Alex alone with all of them wasn't the best idea…. I pray to God my house is still there when I get back._

We drove to the Thrift Store in silence. I didn't mind though because my dad had oldie stations programmed into his radio. We drove there listening to oldies—or rather I listened and Mason listened to my singing of things like: Bad to the Bone, Joker, and Born to Be Wild. Poor boy.

We finally reached the store and walked inside.

"Ok, you go and try to get some stuff for Kakuzu, Kisame, Sasori, and Zetsu." I told him.

He didn't move.

"What?" I asked.

"First off: Won't Zetsu just need a big coat?"

"Hmmm," he really only wore his Akatsuki cloak and shoes in the series…what about…**BOXERS!**...my inner put in, though she did have a point. "Well I guess you're right, but what about…you know…other things?"

He knew what I was talking about, thank Kami, and only nodded, "Yeah ok, but another thing," he said before I could walk off.

"What?"

"Any particular reason that you gave me the members that you'd never ever event think of liking?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, "Listen here, yes I did give you people like Kakuzu, but, I also gave you Sasori. You know that Sasori's like my…fourth or fifth favorite! Right behind Deidara, then Itachi, then…well I don't really know how my list goes, but you get the point!!"

He scoffed, "You still got to pick out Deidara and Itachi's."

I groaned, "Ugh you baka! Fine take Itachi and I'll take Kisame ok?? Jashin you're difficult!" With that I walked off to find stuff for them, but not without hearing Mason mumbled to himself,

"Still leaves you with your favorite."

I just ignored it. I wasn't going to be around him if he was going to go on and on about this. Making my way over to the Big and Tall section for some of the rather big and tall members I started to hum Bad to the Bone again.

Having an aunt that loves oldies and cousins that are younger than you and love saying, "B-B-B-B-B-Bad to the bone," can influence you to like a song.

After just getting things that looked like they could be good for Kisame and Hidan—lot of big clothes being carried by a small-ish kid—people started to look at me oddly. I only glared at them. What did they expect me to do when I had nine guys in need of clothes??

**They don't know that you have the Akatsuki at your house. They probably don't even know who Naruto is…**

_Well still! I mean I could be getting some for a clothes drive together or something!!_

**Right, of course that's what they'd think.**

_Oh ok, O Wise Me, please enlighten me on what these losers are thinking about my pile of fabric?_

**Oh so I'm the smart one here? Well thank you for noticing!!**

_Just say what you think so we can end this!!!_

**Pfft, like I have the slightest clue.**

I fell over anime style in the middle of an aisle, with many odd stares thrown towards me. Pfft like I cared what they thought. I could just blame it on the amount of clothing I was carrying.

"You ok?" I looked up to see Mason standing above me.

I huffed and got up, "No, I broke five of my ribs, twisted my ankle, one of my broken ribs punctured my lungs and another got my heart, and I broke my shin bone." Everyone—yes everyone that was there—stared at me like I was serious. I facepalmed, "I was being sarcastic! Do any of you really think that I'd be standing like this if all that happened??? I'd be on the floor writhing in pain!!!"

**You can be very convincing with your sarcasm…. I almost believed you.**

_You are me!! You'd feel if I was hurt!!!_

…**Oh yeah….**

Ignoring my inner I picked up the clothes and went off to find more. I looked at Mason's pile and he seemed almost done. Well fine then Mr. Pick-Anything-Just-So-We-Can-Get-Out-Of-Here! Typical man….

**Sexist much?**

_You know you agree with me!_

…**So?**

After about another two hours we both had everything that we needed, shoes, clothes, everything. We actually got nine hoodies so that they could go outside when they wanted; they just needed the hood up.

When we brought it all up to be checked out, the lady looked at us very oddly, which was to be expected.

After she checked it all out I handed her the card which earned another odd look. I groaned, "Look we just adopted a bunch of hobos ok? So please just hurry up! The hobos will eat our cat if we don't get home soon!!"

Her eyes widened and she quickly scanned the card and got us out of there so fast I bet she'd be made owner of the place if she did that to everyone.

"Nice description, but I'd have used a different adjective." Mason said. If my hands weren't occupied by bags I would have done my signature Abby-Gibbs-Slap-Of-Doom!! See I changed the name!! Mine now!

So I just settled on kicking him in the leg.

"OW! What the hell Abby??!!"

"They are guests in my home so I'd appreciate it if you didn't insult them! Especially since you, too, are a guest in my house right now!" We reached the truck and slung the bags into the bed of the truck. It wasn't one of those big four door gas-guzzlers. Picture a newer and white version of Bella Swan's truck and you've got it. I was surprised that all the bags fit, and yes I did use something from _twilight_! Bite me if you hate it! And die if you don't think that Taylor Lautner is hot! Oops…off track…

We hopped into the seats as Mason said, "Yeah and me and Chris are going to be guests for awhile now."

I whipped my head around to him, "Excuse me? You two will be guests at my home when I want you to be!"

We pulled out of the parking lot and onto the main road and headed home.

"Abby, there's no way in hell that we're leaving you and _Alex_ alone with the Akatsuki! You two even said yourselves that if they were real you'd rape them!"

So that was where he was going with this.

I let out a laugh, "Wow you two are idiots!! We were kidding! Like we'd actually do that!! They'd kill us you baka!!!!!"

"I don't care; we aren't leaving you two alone with them!"

"Oh? Why not? What do you think is going to happen?"

"You all constantly talk about how much you two like the Akatsuki—"

I cut him off, "What? We do not! You all never let us even say anything about them unless it's the most recent thing to happen in the fucking series!!"

"You all still go completely fangirl when either of you talk about Deidara or Itachi!"

"Yeah when we aren't around you two! We know how much that irritates you all so we don't talk about them like that!! Hell we're barely even allowed to talk about anything about them! Alex was barely allowed to be sad about Itachi when he died and I can't even talk about how awesome it is that Deidara has mouths on his hands and can make explosives!! We barely say anything around you all!!" Ok I was pissed now. I always argue about this with Mason though, and Alex always argues with Chris…. It gets very troublesome…we aren't even allowed to talk about the owner of that quote…(Shikamaru)

"We hear you all when you don't think we're around! You'd think that you two were having seizures the way you all act!!"

"Have you seen the way you all act when it's about some anime _girl_??? You all talk about them all the time in front of us!!!"

He stayed quiet for a minute before saying, "We're still not leaving you alone with them at night."

I almost slapped him. Night? He. Was. So. Dead. "And what is that supposed to mean?" I seethed.

"Just that there's no way in heaven, hell, or earth that we'd leave you alone with them at night! Who knows what would happen!!"

"You bastard. What the hell do you think is going to happen??? Do you think that I'll just be in my room minding my own business when Deidara comes in and we suddenly find that we're both draw to each other and then POOF we're making love on my bed??? Then after that I dump you for him and I eventually get pregnant and since I'm against abortion I have the thing and while I'm at school he'd take care of it and then I'd come home and take it off his hands then at age 18 he finally asks me to marry him since I'm out of school and we finally find a way to get them home and I leave with him while Alex leaves with Itachi?? Then after a few years Deidara goes off and fights Sasuke and, of course, dies. Then after I get over my grief I come back here?? Then what?? Hmmm?? Is that honestly what you think is going to happen??!!" Yes I did just use my mad writer skills to make that up on the spot!!

I hadn't noticed during my rant that we'd made it back home.

Mason was silent after my rant. I guess he didn't know what to say. Then, "…Something like that…."

Next thing Mason knew, he was plastered to the window of my dad's truck with a blood read mark on his cheek…I think some of it was blood…not too sure.

"You fucking bastard's bitch! I hope you fucking rot in hell!" With that I ran out of the truck and towards to garage door—which was already open—and towards the door that led into my house. I didn't even get half way there before the door flung open to reveal all my guests. I pushed past all of them—in towels (Must. Resist. Blushing!)—but not without landing another slap on Chris as well. I knew he thought the same thing about Alex and me.

I was half way to my room when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I was about to slap it away when I saw it was Alex.

"…Abby…what happened?" She asked.

"ASK THAT BASTARD OUT THERE!!!" I tried to run to my room—because I was such a girl like that—but Alex kept me where I was.

"Abby, what did he do?"

"Do you even have to ask?? My own boyfriend thinks I'm going to rape my favorite character!! Just because he's my favorite doesn't mean I'm going to fucking rape Deidara!!!"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

_I…just said…what I think I said…didn't I?_

……**Yeah….**

…_Fuck._

I looked over at the Akatsuki—avoiding certain people's eyes—and saw they were all very much surprised at what I had just said.

Mason had come in and was rubbing his cheek but when he heard me he stopped and had the same expression as the rest of them—even Alex.

"I…uhhh…" I had no clue what to say. So, like any flustered teen girl would do, I ran to my room, slammed the door shut, locked it, sat on my bed, and fumed.

_I…he…I just said that I like Deidara right in front of him…in front of everyone!!! Oh my Jashin!!_

…

_You there??_

…

_Hello??_

**Huh? Oh, sorry…I'm in shock.**

…_Yeah…_

**What are you gonna do?**

_Heh, you keep saying you're a part of me and now that I really do need you to be a part of me, you're saying you aren't. That's rich._

**Well there's not much that I can do, you know.**

I sighed. My inner had a point, but right now I had to figure out how I was going to get to school and get food without seeing…him.

But of course the universe and the great ramen/yaoi gods from above hate me so they don't want me to have any chance to think of ways to avoid Deidara without him interrupting my avoiding plans to talk to me. Hmmm, I think I'm starting to warm up to the universe! At least it's not raining! No, wait, that's only when you're in a bad predicament outside…crap!

I heard a knock on my door thinking that it'd be Alex, but I had to make sure, "Who is it…? Mason if that's you I swear I will—"

"No…it's me…" Cue blushing and moths—not butterflies, _moths_—in my stomach. "It's Deidara."

I couldn't speak, but I did hear Alex trying to talk quietly outside "Is her door unlocked?"

My door handle shook as they tried to open it. Thank Kami I locked it.

"It's locked," I heard Tobi say.

"Here let me try to get it," Konan spoke.

Jesus Jashin is everyone out there??!

_Click_!

Damn ninja and they're unlocking jutsus!!

I may have heard a million people outside my door, but when it finally opened only Deidara was there.

I narrowed my eyes, "Where's that bastard? Doesn't he have the balls to come in here himself and apologize? Or is he afraid I'm just going to slap him again, because he doesn't have to worry about that."

He sighed, "Alexis made him stay out there and Konan forced me in here." He laughed, "I'd think that you'd slap is face right off the way you yelled when you came in, hm."

The corners of my mouth twitched to smile but I held them back, "I only said he didn't have to worry about my slapping him, I never said that I wouldn't kick him in the place that really matters." Then I broke into a smile. Well a smile that one could make in the face of an Akatsuki member that just found out you liked him…so a grimace really.

"Heh, remind me to never piss you off."

"That's a good idea…"

Usually I like silence, but when it's awkward I just want to shoot the other person. What? I don't want to die just to get out of an awkward situation! Why should I shoot myself when there's another person I can shoot that will also end the silence? Damn off track again.

Yes, it was quiet for a long time before Deidara spoke again, "Well I guess it didn't take me too long to find out who your favorite was, yeah."

I felt the heat on my face. "Y-Yeah, I guess so…" My stomach felt like it was about to fly right off of me.

"…I already figured that Itachi was Alexis's…she did run right to him when she came in, un. Plus the way he acted when she was over during the week…."

I laughed, "Yeah he's her favorite. She loves the whole indifference that he has about him, and of course the Sharingan…all that makes him my second, heh…" Awkward again… "You're up there on her list too…probably because of your hands and art…she was always a bit of a pyro." Major awkwardness when the hands were brought in, well for me at least.

"Oh?" Now while I was sitting there feeling like my face was going to burn off and my stomach was doing the Macarena, he was standing there with his arms crossed, and now smiling. Smiling! No, wait, Akatsuki don't smile, they smirk! Ok so he was smirking. Whatever. "And why am I so high up on your 'list'?"

Now my stomach was doing the Cha Cha Slide. "Uhhh, well…your…art…. I really like it…though I was never really a pyro." I sighed and put my elbows on my knees and my face in my hands. Can't he just leave already so I can take all this frustration out on the two bakas out there? Maybe I could even take a knife to Hidan…that would definitely make my day.

I had to laugh at the sight of me yelling over Hidan's yelling disembodied head over in a corner while I stabbed his body and cut off limbs with a simple kitchen knife.

"What's so funny, yeah?" Deidara said from right next to me. I hadn't noticed that he even sat down. Wait. Shinobi. Right!

"WHOA!" I said and jumped an inch away. What's with these people and startling me?? I just stared at him for a minute while he stared at me.

"You aren't going to hit me like you did to Hidan, are you?" He said after a moment.

"Uhhh, no?"

"Ok, good. Now what's so funny?" He asked and leaned closer. Fuck him!

"I was just imagining taking out my anger on Hidan with a kitchen knife…while yelling at Mason…it was kind of funny I guess…" I mumbled.

But of course he had ninja ears so he heard it. "Ha! I'd pay to see Hidan get his ass whooped by anyone that wasn't a shinobi!"

I pinched his arm, "And what's that supposed to mean Mr. I'll-Blow-Everything-I-See-Up-Because-It's-Awesome?"

He pinched my arm right back, "Just that it'd be funny to see an immortal ninja get beat by an un-trained non-ninja, Ms. Sick-Minded-Boy-On-Boy-Lover."

"Hey! It's awesome! And owww! Why did you pinch me??" I rubbed my arm.

"I already told you: Don't flick me and I won't flick you."

"Hmph, touché." It was silent then for another minute or so. "…Why did you come? I mean why did you come in here instead of Alex? Or even Konan?"

He blinked at me, "I already said they made me…"

I looked at the floor, "Yeah, but didn't they tell you to say or do anything? Did they just go up to you and say 'Go in there' then dragged you over and pushed you in?"

"Well actually Tobi dragged me and they unlocked the door and knocked on it…"

"…Oh…ok…I was just wonder—"

"I probably would have come even if they hadn't made me."

I stared at the ground. "O-Oh? W-Why's that? Were you annoyed that I thought of you as my favorite character…?"

I think he was trying to choose his words carefully, or maybe he just didn't know what to say but finally he did speak, "No, actually I was hoping that it would be me…………"

Silence. I had no idea what to say. My head was spinning with what I just heard. I snapped it up to look at him, "What?! Did I just hear you right? Did you just say—"

"Yes, you heard me right." Deidara just kept looking straight ahead.

I didn't think that my eyes cold go any wider than they were, but they went wider, "Why…? I mean I just met you—"

"A week ago, yeah. Since I was a cat and you didn't know that we were really who we are, you didn't have to act different. You acted yourself and as they say, first impressions last, hm." He chuckled, "It's a good thing that the first impression wasn't when we turned human. I don't think anyone would forget that…un" I blushed as the image came popping right back into my head. "Course at first you just seemed like an ok person to be around, then something happened and I wanted to be around you…I could tell the same for when Alex was over with Itachi, hm. He was always slightly saddened when she left.

"Today when she came, he was just surprised by the sudden hug. You should have seen them today while you two were gone, yeah. They talked to each other nonstop while the other boy tried to keep the rest under control.

"While everyone was off doing who knows what, Sasori-danna and I just sat on the couch with our own thoughts, un. It gave me enough time to think all this through." He paused and he looked over at me, "I think I may just like you too."

I was about to faint. I never in my wildest dreams would have thought that even if Deidara came to this world that he'd like me of all people! "Wow." I breathed. My head was spinning even more than before as I continued to stare at him, while he stared at me, and I just prayed to God that I wouldn't faint.

_Wait why's his face getting bigger?!_

**And why do I feel like your leaning to the side?**

Then I realized why. Deidara and I were leaning closer and closer to each other.

We were just an inch away from each other's faces when the door opened and he pulled back quickly like the ninja he is.

"You not pissed yet Abby?!" Alex asked.

I stared at Deidara for a minute before looking over to Alex. She had a confused look on her face, but I just waved it off, "Y-Yeah, I'm not pissed anymore…" I was just confused, happy, worried, surprised, and felt like I was about to blow up with everything that happened in just one day of the freaking Akatsuki being in my house.

* * *

**Me**: WHOOT!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW DID YOU ALL LIKE?? I KNOW I KNOW FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO THINK THIS WAS A BIT TOO EARLY, TOO BAD!! I NEED TO ROMANCE NOW!!!! SO BLEH!!! AND SORRY ABOUT THE BIG ASS MONOLOGUE THAT DEIDARA WENT THROUGH! I HAD TO EXPLAIN HIS POINT OF VIEW AND WHAT HAPPENED WHILE ABBY AND MASON WAS GONE!!!!!

**Deidara**: I almost kissed you?! WTF????

**Me**: u.u I see you don't like me

**Deidara**: …

**Mason**: Why did I get slapped? -.-

**Me**: Because you accused me of rape! Now if you ever read this, you'll know not to do that!

**Alex**: I wasn't really in it…

**Me**: Hey you will be!! Calm!! Review people! I'm hungry and want them! I feed off them!! FEED ME!!! O.o Do you want me to starve?? Then I'll die and never finish!!! XO


	10. Chapter 10

**Me**: Well I don't have much to say other than, I started working on this the same day that I posted chapter nine… So hopefully I don't get writers block for this again… Heh… But I really don't have much to say other than……………………………ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_

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_

Recap:

_I stared at Deidara for a minute before looking over to Alex. She had a confused look on her face, but I just waved it off, "Y-Yeah, I'm not pissed anymore…" I was just confused, happy, worried, surprised, and felt like I was about to blow up with everything that happened in just one day of the freaking Akatsuki being in my house._

* * *

"Ok then come out!!" Alex said.

Deidara quickly got up and walked right past her and out to everyone else. I didn't blame him…

"What's his problem? Abby did you yell at him too?"

I almost didn't hear her, my head was still spinning. "Huh? Oh…no Alex I-I didn't do anything."

She looked at me funny, "Abby. What. Happened?"

I hated when she looked at me like that. I couldn't ever lie!!

"W-Well, you see, I blame you all for forcing him in here! But…he…well, umm he, er we…well…uhh…you see…umm," I was stammering. Alex caught it—anyone could—and closed my door and came over to sit next to me.

"Did he try to rape you?" She asked seriously.

I laughed, "No he didn't."

"Then what??"

"…If you hadn't had come in when you did we would have…ummm……kissed?" Yes I did put a question mark at the end of my sentence!! Sue me.

Alex's eyes went wide and she stared at me. "H-He what?"

"_He _should be _we_ first off, and second, nothing happened…because you came in right when it would have. So let's just drop it for right now ok?"

I tried to get up but she just pulled me back down, "No way! You aren't going anywhere until you explain what happened in here!!"

I sighed; there was no getting around Alex when she wanted to know something. If I didn't tell her now she'd go ask Deidara, but he may not tell her, so she'd just ask and ask and ask in front of all of them and make her own assumptions. "Fine! We were just talking and he said that he liked me too and we almost kissed when you came in! That's it!" She still gave me an odd look. I narrowed my eyes at her, "Scout's honor," I held up two—yes two, that's what we do—fingers to her and her face went back to normal.

With Alex and I, when the other is asking you something and they think you're lying you just have to hold up two fingers instead of three for the Scout's honor thing. It also helps when you're explaining it to someone else and if you want to lie you can hold up three and say it, then the other knows you're still lying…yes it is complicated, but that's how we are.

"Ok," she said, "but you know that now it's going to be my mission to get you two in bed together!!"

If I had been drinking I would have spit it out everywhere, "EXCUSE ME?!" I pretty much yelled.

Alex just started laughing, "I'm kidding!! I know you plan on staying virgin forever!"

I laughed with her, "If I do, then you have to, too!"

We were both having a laughing fit when everyone came in to see what was going on—minus a certain blond…hmm where did he go?

"Are they going to die?" Kisame said.

"Perhaps," Sasori put in.

"**Can I eat them then?** No we can't eat them. **But— **No. **Fine, killjoy.**" Zetsu said.

We finally caught our breath and stood up. 'Course I had to stand up to face Mason…yippee….

I sighed, "Why the hell are you still here?"

"Abby I thought you weren't pissed anymore!" Alex said.

"Yeah well I wasn't, until I saw him!" I pointed at Mason.

"Tch, whatever."

Then I remembered something: I almost kissed Deidara when I was dating Mason…wow I almost cheated on my first boyfriend…heh…oops?

"HOLY MOTHER OF GRAVY!!!" I yelled.

"What??" Alex asked.

Everyone looked over to me.

**Maybe shouting randomly isn't that good of an idea, ne?**

_Oh shut up!_

"Uhhh," I said, "Umm I thought I saw a spider…?"

"Are you fucking serious?" Hidan asked.

"Yes, yes I am!"

"You're afraid of a fucking spider?!" He asked again.

"Yes, yes I fucking am!"

"Abby, are you quoting Phineas and Ferb?" Alex asked.

"Yes, yes I am!!" I said.

"Ugh, shut up!" Kisame said.

"You shut up fish sticks!" I yelled at him. Then I remembered I was still pissed at Mason. "And you," I pointed at Mason again, "I'll ask again, why in fucking hell is your damn ass still in my house?" I didn't wait for a reply as I stormed out of my room and out to the living room. I sat in my dad's recliner. It is very comfy!

Right after I sat I saw Deidara sitting on the couch before everyone else came into the living room. We stared at each other until everyone started to come in.

Mason walked over to my chair and sighed, "Can I just talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," I sat up straight and crossed my arms and legs—you know a girl is pissed when we cross our arms _and_ legs, "Talk."

"I meant alone."

Before I had time to answer he grabbed my wrist and pulled me out to my back porch and closed the sliding glass door.

"What do you want?! Aren't you done criticizing me for one day?? Or do you still want to put down your own girlfriend, hmmm?? You are so lucky that my brain has been frazzled all day to the point that I haven't even thought of dumping your sorry ass until now! You know that actually sounds like a pretty good idea—"

"I'm sorry, ok?"

I stared at him for a minute. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I said I was sorry."

I raised my eyebrow and crossed my arms, "Is that so? Well I don't really know how keen I am to believing you right now."

"I know, and you have every right to be angry with me, but I really am sorry."

I sighed, "Mason how many times have you said you're sorry about something to me? A lot. And how many of those times have you been lying? Well let me answer that for you! Every. Single. One. I'm surprised that I'm even still with you!!"

He winced, "I know but this time I really do mean it."

I pursed my lip in a thinking manner before saying, "Explain."

"I'm pretty sure that this goes without saying, but Chris and I are jealous of Itachi and Deidara." He said 'Deidara' almost as if it burned his tongue. It probably did. "So can you really blame us—" I eyed him, he sighed, "Can you really blame _me_ for accusing you?"

"Yes I can! If that's how you're going to act because I have the Akatsuki in my house then you can just leave now!"

Mason took a step towards me, I took one back.

"Unless you can promise me that you won't act jealous or like you think I'll throw myself at them like a common _slut_ I don't want you in this house, or anywhere near me ever again. Can you promise me that?" It hurt when I said 'slut', because the way that he was saying all of that, he was pretty much calling me that. Of course it would make me a little teary-eyed and sting when I finally thought about that. I guess that my anger was fading and the underlying emotion of sadness was finally coming to the surface.

I was sad that the first guy to say that he loved just called me a whore. Who wouldn't?

"I'm sorry, and I promise that it won't happen again." I continued to stand there and let him walk over to me. He pulled me into a hug and whispered in my ear, "Also, I never called you a slut…and if that's how it seemed, I'm sorry. I never meant for it to come out like that at all."

"I know," I murmured, "but you never thought that I'd take it like that, you never thought I'd think you were calling me a whore."

We stood there a minute longer as I let some of the tears overflow, but I quickly brushed them away and at some point the sad tears turned into angry ones. Angry because I was frustrated that I was letting myself cry in front of anyone that wasn't my mom or Alex. Damn teen girl hormones. They are going in my Death Note!!

I finally got under control and broke away from Mason, took a deep breath and said, "Ok I'm good. Let's go back in now."

He nodded and we walked back in. I really did feel better now that Mason had apologized and everything. That is, I felt better until I entered and saw Deidara. I couldn't believe I had forgotten all about the fact that he almost kissed me! I froze on the spot and just stared at him.

Everyone else was off doing something else in the house. Mason went over with Chris and Alex, while I stopped just inside the doorway to the porch.

Alex saw my sudden upset—she was the only one, thank the ninja gods from above—and came over to me. "Abby are you ok? What did Mason do?"

I didn't answer, I just stared ahead at Deidara, he didn't notice though.

"Abby? What did he do?! You can tell me!" Alex put her hand on my shoulder.

I shook my head, "No, it's not what Mason did." She looked confused so I clarified, "It's what _I_ did Alex! Oh God what's wrong with me??" I pretty much fell over and leaned on the wall—if it wasn't there then I'd have actually drawn attention to me by falling on my face. Oh how graceful that would have been!

"Abby what do you mean??" Alex asked urgently.

"Alex, I already told you. I almost kissed Deidara!"

She let out a low chuckle, "Abby are you really getting worked up over that??"

I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Ab," That's her nickname for me, "you all _almost_ kissed! You didn't! So technically it's not cheating. And even if it was, it's just one kiss. Not much trouble."

I shook my head, "But it's Deidara. And Mason's my first boyfriend! What would it say if I were to cheat on my first boyfriend Alex??"

She sighed, "Well you didn't kiss so just forget it for now, ok? As long as it doesn't happen again, then you're fine!"

"But—!"

"You will be fine if it doesn't happen again, ok??" She stared me down.

I was about to reply when the phone rang. Thank Kami that the Akatsuki had already been here a week, so it didn't really startle them a lot, but they all did jump somewhat.

I ran over to the phone and looked at the caller I.D. It was my mom. All concern over what had just happened left my mind to be replaced with joy that I'd be able to talk to my mom and dad before they leave…and that the Akatsuki were being as loud as can be.

"GAH! SHHH!! PEOPLE SHUT UP IT'S MY MOM! IF SHE HEARS YOU ALL THEN YOU ARE ALL DONE FOR!" With that they all quieted. Wow, I have the power of the force!!

**Oh shut it! You've never even seen Star Wars!**

_Your point?_

**Just answer the phone!**

I hit the 'talk' button and put the phone to my ear, "Hello?"

"Hey hun, we finally made it to the ship and got settled. Just called to tell ya." I heard my mom say.

"Oh yeah! Ummm thanks for the call, mom. I hope that you all have fun on the cruise! I guess I'll talk to you all when you get there?"

"Now hold on! You're father and I want to talk to you before we can't for a week. Just let me put it on speaker." I waited until I heard her again, "Can you hear us?"

"Yes mom."

"Hey Abby." I heard my dad.

"Hey dad! So are we good now?" I just wanted to hang up already so as not to risk them hearing the Akatsuki.

"Is Alex there yet?" Mom asked.

I groaned, "Yes mom, Alex is here."

"Put in on speaker so we can talk to her." My dad said.

There was no way I could put in on speaker! If the Akatsuki slipped up then it was all over. Especially if it was on speaker phone—on normal phone I could just blame it on the T.V. "Umm she's…umm…in the bathroom right now. 'Could be awhile. You'll just have to talk to her when you finally get to Hawaii." I saw Alex twitch while Mason and Chris chuckled. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh well then I guess we'll just talk to you all once we get there." Mom said.

"Yeah I guess so."

"Hey, Abby you two are being careful without us right? I don't want to come back to find the house burned down." Dad said.

I laughed, "No the house is still alive." Of course when he said the thing about burning down the house that just made me think of a certain blond blowing up my house…which made me sad…again…damn…damn, damn, damn!!

"Abby, are you ok?" My mom asked. Moms could always tell when you were sad…damn mom superpowers!!!

"Huh? Oh yeah I'm fine mom, really." I hated lying to my mom, but it's not like I could tell her everything. Especially not in front of everyone—they had all re-entered the living room from wherever they were.

"You know that you can tell us anything right?"

I could almost feel my heartstrings being pulled. I know that it's really cheesy and cliché, but my mom has always been the one that I go to about everything. If she doesn't know something, then Alex does, and if neither of them knows something about me, no one does. My mom not being here for two months is going to be hard, I knew that, but I never expected this to happen! If I knew all this was going to fall in my lap then I'd never have let them go. "Yeah, mom, I know. Don't worry. If anything happens I have Alex, ok?"

She sighed, "Alright, I love you Abby, be safe."

"I love you too, and be safe," dad put in.

"I love you both too, and don't worry; I'll be as safe as I can with Alex here." I laughed and me and my parents finally hung up. For the first time in my whole life I wouldn't be able to contact either of my parents for a whole week. Sure I've been over at my cousin's house for over a week without my parents, but I was still able to talk to them whenever I wanted to. Now, I couldn't talk to either of them during one week of what will probably be the most important two months of my entire life.

As I put the phone back into its charger and looked at everyone I smiled and said, "Let's get you all in some clothes now, shall we?" And walked out to my dad's truck with Alex, Mason, and Chris, got the bags, brought them in, and started the long task of remembering what article of clothing went with which murderer.

After finally getting clothes for all of them, we sent them into rooms and made them change. It was quite an experience whenever we finally got the correct pair of boxers for each person. Chris and Mason laughed at Alex, my, and Konan's expressions whenever that came up.

Soon the boys came out dressed in proper attire. Most of them just had on some sort of t-shirt and a pair of jeans—I say most because Zetsu just had a big coat on. He said that it was just fine for him. Good!

By then it was about dinner time and I realized that I hadn't eaten since breakfast—Alex said that while Mason and I were gone she made them Mac'n'cheese. It took about five boxes—the rest of it—to feed all of them. Well at least we know they like that….

Actually cooking dinner and eating it wasn't all that bad, it was what happened before and after dinner that was a pain. Two words: Alex—no duh—and youtube. She pretty much showed them every single funny picture video, fanflash, Caramelldansen, Numa Numa, and AMV that she could fit into the small span of time she had until dinner. She turned up the volume so I'd know what was going on while in the kitchen. I was laughing through all the cooking of frozen pizza.

When I came over to see what they were watching once I saw that it was the video of Tobi and Deidara Caramelldansen. Only me, Alex, Chris, and Mason laughed. Everyone else was scarred for life—course that happened with every video but still.

Once the food was ready I handed out slices and we went back to watching what we could on there. We couldn't watch things that hadn't happened yet. For instance we couldn't watch any AMVs about any of them that had video in it. That would give away a lot of stuff since they hadn't even reached Shippuuden yet and that's where pretty much all of them made their debut.

Some of the things that they saw they liked. Most of the AMVs they liked…but most of the fanflashes……they wanted to find the people and kill them. Who could blame them? They were funny! So that means that they'd have to be horrible to the people they are about, right? Well you are right.

Soon it was 8:00—no clue how time could have passed so quickly—and Chris was getting a text saying that they had to head home.

Alex and I walked them to the door and while Alex was saying good-bye to Chris I asked Mason, "You remember what we talked about earlier right? That you won't think anything of leaving them here alone with us."

He smiled and nodded, "Yeah don't worry ok?"

I smiled back and said, "Ok good. Well I guess that I'll see you all tomorrow?" I looked to my side to see that Chris had dragged Alex off somewhere…well shit. Now don't you go thinking that Chris is trying anything on Alex or vice versa! Oh no! Of course this has to happen the day that my mind is the most confused it's ever been….

In one short explanation: Mason and I have been going out for a few months now—I don't know how that happened either—and like I said before, my lips are still virgin. Odd ain't it? Well we usually never get any time alone sooooo yeah…but, hey, look! We're alone now! Any other night before now and I might have been fine with it…but considering recent events I find it amazing that Mason would try anything…men…odd creatures they are!

Oh, hey, look again! Once again the guy's face that is in front of me is getting closer…. Well you know what I have to say to that? Fuck…just plain old fuck…

Before he can really get any closer I jump away like he's a vampire about to suck my blood. Though that would be awesome!

He looks at me confused.

"Eh heh, heh, heh, I bet you're wondering why I did that" **Well no chizz Sherlock! **"…well…" I sighed, "Mason today has been a very long, very confusing day. I'm sorry."

He sighed an irritated sigh…men! I will kill them all!!! Heh…

I sighed too at his irritated sigh, "Ok what's the freaking problem now??"

He didn't even hesitate to get to the point…odd…no wait, that's not odd…I think…hmmm…oh yeah, what he was going to say, "We have been going out for how many months? And we haven't even kissed yet!" Geez he sounded like the girl in the relationship here…wait…that would make me the guy!!! Nooooo!!!!

I growled at him—yes growled, got a problem? "I have had the most stressful day ever, so please, not now."

Mason smirked, "You know what could relieve stress?'

I went over and flicked him in the head, "Get your mind out of the gutter or you'll never get anything out of me."

He rubbed his forehead, "Ow, geez I was kidding!"

I giggled, "Right, of course you are. Now get back to Chris's before his parents kill you two." With that I went back into my house to see that Alex was already there. "Where'd Chris go?"

Alex sighed and rolled her eyes, "He pushed me in here and told me to stay and then left. I tried to tell him that now wasn't good, but you know them."

"Yeah I know, so I guess I don't really have to tell you what happened out there?"

"Nope."

After that I decided that we could just watch a movie until it was late enough for sleep. I popped in Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl and we all took a seat somewhere in my living room.

"What the fuck is this?" Hidan asked.

"A movie about cursed and sexy pirates." Alex said matter-of-factly.

He raised an eyebrow but I shushed him before he could say anymore, "Shh! You'll like it if you just shut up, listen to it, and give it a chance!"

"Aren't you just the little bossy girl?" Kisame said.

"Yeah and if you really want to see her bossy just wait about another week!" Alex said.

I threw the remote at her head, "They don't need to know about those things!"

Konan gave me a knowing look while all the guys looked at me oddly.

"Owww Abby that was my head!!!" Alex said and broke the silence.

"Oh don't worry I don't think that anything too important is in there." Kisame said and Hidan chuckled.

She smirked, "Itachi! Kakuzu! You're partners in crime and love are being mean!!" Oh how Alex loved being blunt.

All four men twitched while everyone else laughed.

"Tobi doesn't get it." Guess who said.

"Is he even old enough to know these things, hm?" That's when I finally realized where I was sitting. I was on the floor sitting between Alex and Konan—Alex was next to Itachi and Konan was next to Pein…awwwwww—but guess who was sitting on the couch behind me? Yup…ORLANDO BLOOM! Whoa how'd he get out of my T.V.?

Yes Deidara was behind me. I was pretty much, more or less, sitting between his legs…enter awkward silence for me. I felt my face heat up and I was so happy that we turned off the lights for the movie.

"Who fucking knows? He probably isn't." Hidan said as he recovered from his momentary shock.

After that we all watched the movie and Alex and I quoted certain parts, such as when Jack Sparrow finally enters and he comes sailing in on his sinking ship and does all his funny stuff. Oh how we love this movie. Of course I never forgot that I was sitting right under Deidara. I tried to forget throughout the movie, but after quoting something or another I'd let my mind wander and then I'd feel the leg beside me and remember. I didn't really know how to feel about this though….

I didn't know what time it was—it was around when Jack and Elizabeth were on the island alone—but I started to nod off. I could feel it, but I didn't say anything. I was too tired. So naturally my head started to go to one side…along with the rest of my body and soon I felt myself leaning against Deidara's leg almost asleep…. Oh dear lord kill me now! This could be one of the most embarrassing things ever…or at least it would be if I were more awake and could hear everyone's snickers at the scene of me leaning against his leg.

Well to me it felt like I was just leaning, but you know how you sleep with a second pillow that you hold on to at night? Well his leg was my pillow right now. I was pretty much clinging to his leg like a Koala bear.

The reason he didn't kick me off was because he was also nodding off…hmm.

I have to remember to thank Konan because she apparently got tired of them making fun of us and poked me awake.

As I say again, thank you dear ninja lords for making me turn off the lights!!! Though I bet my face was its own light being as red as it felt.

Hidan, Kisame, Sasori, Zetsu, and even Kakuzu were chucking/laughing at my expression and Deidara's. Oh I'll never live this down with them! But at least he wasn't still in his towel…heh. Wouldn't that have been something? Espicially since at one point in the movie when I quoted something he asked exactly how many times I have seen this and I looked up at him from my spot to tell him that I didn't rightly know. Kami if he had had the towel…IMAGES!!!

I looked over to the clock to see that it was 10:30 and the second Pirates of the Caribbean was playing. So I just ignored them and leaned against Alex and watched. Oh how hot Orlando Bloom could make a pirate!

Nothing too exciting happened through there…unless you count the fact that Tobi finally had to go to the bathroom for the first time that day—most of them hadn't yet though…pfft they were afraid of the toilet! Wow they really are cats! So when he went in, I don't know now, and I don't want to know, but he somehow managed to overflow the toilet before he even went! That takes major skill….

So after we mopped that up and Alex and I comforted Tobi telling him that he was still a good boy I finally decided that it was time for bed. This rose a question that I hadn't thought about yet today: Where were they all going to sleep?

"Shit." I said when we all made our way back to the living room.

"What?" Alex said through a yawn.

"We're all tired and we need to get to bed."

"Ok, well let's go then…"

"Tell me Alex, where are they all going to sleep?"

Silence. No one said anything.

At least until, "I am not turning back into that fucking cat form! No way in hell!!" Hidan said.

"I agree with Hidan, I am not going back to that form unless it's absolutely necessary." Pein said.

"Ok well let me think about this for a minute," I said.

Apparently Alex had been thinking about this for some time, because she shook her head and smirked a very evil and perverted smirk, "Well we should keep them with their partners, I mean they're used to sleeping together after all." I face palmed, but that wasn't even the least of the meaning of her smirk, "And how about two to a room? For example: Tobi and Zetsu can sleep out here, Pein and Konan can sleep in her dad's bed, Hidan and Kakuzu can sleep on the floor in there, Itachi and Kisame can sleep on the floor of her mom's room, they can't sleep in the bed because that's where I am, and Deidara and Sasori can be in Abby's room."

I went over and Abby-Gibbs-Slapped her. "Baka you just want to make me suffer and you just want to sleep in the same room as Itachi!"

She blushed but continued in a whispered voice to me, "And get Pein and Konan in the same bed."

I laughed but was still annoyed, "Well why the hell does Deidara of all people have to be in my room??"

"Because Pein and Konan need to be in the same bed, I want Itachi in my room, Kisame needs to be in the same room as him because I'm just OCD like that, and do you really want Hidan or Kakuzu in your room when you're asleep??"

We both looked over to Hidan who heard the last of what we said and was smirking the most perverted smirk ever.

"I'd rather Jiraiya be in there! He at least has some decency!" I said.

"…True."

Hidan fell over anime style, "You all are so cruel!"

"OMFJ HE DIDN'T CUSS!" Alex and I said in unison.

He narrowed his eyes at us, "You want cursing? Ok then: (This has been censored to the fact that this is a T rated fanfic and the authoress can't curse out anyone to save her life. Thank you for understanding.)

We all stared at him in awe. After we recovered and I argued with Alex a bit more I finally gave in as did everyone else.

Alex and I went to change into PJs and left Konan in charge until we got back.

Once we were done we got them all bedding for the ground and set that up, then went to bed.

Not before telling all of them that they were only to get up if they couldn't sleep—and if that was the case to go outside—, if they had to pee—Alex and her bluntness—, or if they wanted water or something, and not to go into anyone's room—Alex's and mine—unless it was absolutely necessary.

Pein, Konan, Kakuzu, and Hidan went into my dad's room, Tobi and Zetsu went to the living room, Alex, Itachi, and Kisame went to my mom's room leaving me with Deidara and Sasori in my room.

I just walked over to my bed and told them to sleep wherever they wanted.

Right after I got into my bed I heard Sasori say, "You do know that since I'm a puppet I won't be sleeping?"

My hand paused on its way to turn off the light, "As long as you don't try to rape me or do anything criminal I'm fine with it, ok?"

He nodded.

"Oh and," I said, "Since you won't be sleeping, if I can't sleep I may just talk to you until I can sleep." I turned off the light with a smile before he could say anything.

It really didn't affect me as much to be sleeping in the same room as Deidara in Sasori when the lights were off…which that should just make me more afraid…but I'm just odd like that.

My first night sleeping with full-out Akatsuki members in my house was pretty quiet. It's what happened in the span of the next few weeks that will leave me almost fully drained of everything that I have.

* * *

**Me**: Ok well first off, yes there was fluff between Abby and Mason but that is important for later!! And sorry if this seemed like a rushed chapter…it's the longest yet!!! DEAL WITH IT!!!

**Deidara**: There wasn't much with me in here

**Akatsuki**: Or us!!

**Me**: I know, I know! I need to develop things with the OCs! It's vital to the plot of the story! Don't worry people…this will not turn out to be like those AkatOC stories where it only focuses on the OCs! I hope you all can patiently wait for everything!! Trust me it will all be worth the wait for what I have planned…x3

Oh and suggestions are still appreciated! I will listen and consider each one! But some may not be usable!! I have to say that right now! Yours may not be able to be used! Send them in anyways! And…REVIEW!!! And I shall say this again: **Sorry if it seemed rushed!! This is a very long chapter! Longest yet! Please understand!! I really just want to get to the plot already—Whoa there's a plot, o.o?—but in a non-rushed way XD. So please don't say anything about the rushed feel of this!!**


	11. Chapter 11

Me: Well here's the next chapter!! During some of this I was listening to _Skillet_. I just started to listen to them so I only know about nine songs or so…heh. If you listen give me some of your favorites! Lolz XD

Hidan: It's not bad…

Me: WHOA YOU AGREED WITH ME AND DIDN'T CUSS!!!

Deidara: Is he broken or something?

Me: Maybe… Hey you know who should be here?

Deidara and Hidan: Who?

Me: *Pulls out Gaara* XD

Deidara: HELL NO!

Me: No one cares! Hi Gaara!

Gaara: …Hello…

Me: I go through Gaara fazes XD I think I might be entering one again…. (I'm hearing him in my head! Along with Itachi but that is a whole other matter)

Hidan: Just get on with the story!!!!

Me: Meanie…this is why I didn't get a plushie of you!!

Itachi: Yeah just me and the brat…

Deidara: Yeah but I'm bigger ^_^

All but me: O.o WTF do you mean by that??

Me: *Slaps them all* He means that his plushie is a foot tall while Itachi's is only a few inches or so! Sickos…ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_

* * *

_

Recap:

_My first night sleeping with full-out Akatsuki members in my house was pretty quiet. It's what happened in the span of the next few weeks that will leave me almost fully drained of everything that I have._

* * *

The next day wasn't all that eventful. Mason had to go home early so Chris didn't come over.

For breakfast I had just enough poptarts for them all to have one each. I'll be running out of food pretty quickly at this rate…

After that we decided that they all needed showers…oh how interesting that was. We had to teach them how to use and let them all go first so that Alex and I wouldn't use up all the hot water—hot water turns them human, cold or anything that's not at least warm will turn them into cats.

Luckily we had enough hot water for them all to take hot showers even though they were using both showers—mine and my mom's, and my dad's.

Remind me later to call the water company to tell them to give this house more hot water. Since ten people had to take hot showers there wasn't any hot water left for Alex and me! Though I must say that they all smelled a lot better.

After that they said that they wanted to go outside. I decided to just let them out into my backyard—who would see them there?

Pein asked if anyone would see them training back there. I told him that as long as they didn't use any ninjutsu or genjutsu they'd be ok. It would probably be good if they didn't use any weapons either, though they didn't have any since those were with their clothes back in the Naruto world.

Since Alex and I didn't know anything about taijutsu we sat it out in the beginning—we read warriors books like the dorks we are while we watched them, we felt like mothers. I say the beginning because when I looked over to Alex to ask her something or other about Jaypaw—third series, BOOYA!—I saw that she wasn't there. I figured she just went to the bathroom or something until I looked over at everyone and saw that she was being taught taijutsu…by _Itachi!_

I felt my mouth hang open as I stared. She was without a doubt the clumsiest person I knew. Just watching her flailing about while she tried to hit and dodge Itachi was entertainment alone. Of course I only laughed harder when Itachi went behind her to show her how to hold her hands and such and she blushed like mad.

Since I was dying of laughter I didn't notice that someone had sat down in the seat that Alex once occupied. So it goes without saying that when I heard a voice I was a bit startled.

"Enjoying yourself, hm?"

"GAH NINJA!!" I jumped and turned to see Deidara smirking at my surprise. I swear I will get back at all of them for scaring the crap out of me whenever they could!

"Yes I am a ninja, and it looks like your friend is trying to learn some stuff, yeah" he laughed. "I haven't known Itachi too long, but I do know that that isn't something you'd see him ever doing, un."

I smiled, "I think that Alex could die happy now."

"Oh is that so?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that you and everyone here have figured out by now that Itachi is her favorite."

"It's not that hard to see, yeah."

We were quiet for a minute. It was an awkward silence.

"Gay baby was born." I said suddenly.

He gave me a look of what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-you?

"Whenever there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born. Well that's what my friends say. I guess that whoever came up with it just made it up to break the awkward silences…." I explained.

"This world sure is an odd one, un."

"HA! Dude you all haven't even gotten a glimpse of half the shit that happens in America alone! 'Course I bet we're one of the most messed up countries out there…."

"Oh, why's that, yeah?"

"Well how about I just turn on the news tonight along with _Entertainment Tonight_ and _Extra_? Then you will know." I stared ahead. "Though _Entertainment Tonight_ and _Extra_ pretty much have the same stories. They're all about celebrities anyways but it would definitely show you all a piece of American culture. Then there's the news…ha! Wait until you hear about the war going on right now!! I have to say that sometimes I think that your world is much more peaceful than here."

Deidara only stared at me. It was quiet for a few minutes; we were both left with our own thoughts as we watched everyone. It amazed me to watch them hit and dodge with such accuracy. I mean, sure, I see this stuff all the time in movies and anime, but that's all coordinated or animated. This is real and right in front of me, that and I've never seen people 'fight' unless it was at school and that's when people really want to cause harm.

"Do you want to learn, un?"

I tore my eyes from everyone to see Deidara looking at me with a blank expression, "W-What?"

He rolled his eyes, "Do you want to learn some of the basics, too, yeah?"

I couldn't believe my ears. First the Akatsuki show up in my house, then Deidara says he likes me, and then tries to kiss me, and then he asks if I want to learn taijutsu. It would be a lie to say I wasn't excited to learn this. I nodded my head hesitantly, "S-Sure, but I have to warn you that I don't think I could throw a decent punch to save my life." I stood up.

He got up too and led me to a part of my backyard that wasn't really being used—I have a small backyard, "I wouldn't have thought that; not after the way you hit Hidan and Mason."

I looked at the ground, "Those were just adrenaline rushes. If I were to try and hit any of you now I'd never hit."

"Let's see about that, hm" he took a step back and put his hands on his hips, "Hit me."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, yeah. Hit me."

"Umm o-ok?" I hesitated for a minute before pulling back my fist and letting it fly towards his chest.

Before it even made contact he grabbed it. "Too slow." He smirked.

I glared, "Well that's because you have freaky ninja reflexes and I barely even have decent hand-eye coordination!"

"Well that's just going to have to be something that we'll have to work on, yeah?"

I smirked now as well, "Yeah I guess so." My smirk fell, though, when I realized that he still had my fist in his hand. "U-uhh, D-Deidara…?"

"Hmm? What is it?"

"Do you t-think you c-could let go of my hand…?" I stuttered like a fangirl and I could feel a bit of warmth ghost over my face.

He looked down at our hands and immediately dropped it, "Oh sorry." We stood there a little longer before he spoke again, "About yesterday, I'm sorry—"

"It's fine. Really. Let's just get back to me trying to knock out your teeth ok?" I grinned trying desperately to avoid another gay baby being born…

After about half an hour of training Alex and I were both about to collapse whereas everyone else didn't seem the least bit worn out. But that's what you get when you aren't physically active, _ever_.

I pulled myself over to chairs just outside the sliding glass door panting.

"You can't be that tired yet, un." Deidara laughed.

"Well excuse me for not ever doing anything in P.E!" I shot back as Alex made her way over with Itachi as well.

"You did well for your first lesson, Alex." Itachi said while they walked over.

"Even though I'm almost dead! Not to mention I feel like I just jumped into a pool I'm swearing so much."

I laughed at her. Alex and I didn't mind the sweating or anything like that; we just loved to make fun of ourselves like that. Since tomorrow we'll probably be in the worst pain ever from this we'll be laughing about it all day.

"Oh shut up Abby! You aren't any better. Go get me some water before I'm forced to drink my own sweat!" Alex said as she sat down.

"Well you do have enough, and why do I have to get it? I'm just as tired as you."

"One: It's your house and I'm the guest and Two: what do you mean? You trained too today?"

I face palmed, "Alex look at me! I can barely breathe or move just like you."

Alex turned her head to look at me and laughed, "Sorry. So I'm guessing Deidara helped you?"

I smirked, "Yeah just like Itachi helped you. Are you sure that your face isn't red from the heat and not training with Itachi?"

"Oh shut up! I saw you and Deidara when you first went out there. What is it with you two and accidentally holding the other's hand too long? Odd I guess." For some reason whenever we had these arguments the boys never heard us.

"You know I'd Gibbs-Slap you if I wasn't about to die."

"Just go get us some water before we die!"

I sighed and got up, "Keep your eyes on all of them!" With that I went into the house oblivious to what Hidan was doing and the fact that my next door neighbor had entered her backyard. Walking into the kitchen and going out into the garage to get some water I was starting to feel like my legs were going to fall off. I got out two water bottles and drank one of them before I even closed the door then grabbed another. Drinking that one as well I let my mind wander.

_Geez it was only half an hour but I wouldn't have even agreed to learn if I knew you could do so much in just that amount of time!_

**Yeah that was more than you do in one week of gym! How do they do it?!**

_Well they train their bodies to be able to do that and they do it every day. They're used to it._

**But did he have to train us so hard?**

_What are you complaining about? You don't even have a body!_

**I still feel what our body feels!!**

_Oh so if I were to hurt myself you'd feel it too?_

**Yes but don't go all masochist on me!**

_I shall try my best._

I walked back into the kitchen with two full water bottles—for Alex—and one half empty one—for me.

I put them on the counter and leaned on it for a minute when I heard the door slide open and figured that Alex was getting impatient so she finally got up and came in herself, but when I looked up—I could see the sliding door from the kitchen—I saw Tobi running over to me instead.

"ABBY-CHAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!" He said as he glomped me.

"Argh! Tobi don't crush me! What's up, where's the fire??"

"ABBY-CHAN THERE'S A SCARY LADY OUTSIDE YELLING AT HIDAN!!!"

"What? What are you talking about Tobi?" That's when he finally let go and I looked out the window to the back yard to see Ms. Ingrid yelling at Hidan. I couldn't hear her but I sure as hell could hear Hidan and his cussing. He was saying something about Jashin. I looked at the ground to see that it had some circle on it and when I looked closer at Hidan I saw that he was bleeding.

He had done some sort of ritual where I'm guessing he didn't need a sacrifice, and Ms. Ingrid caught him. Now I wasn't worried about her seeing them because she's so insane no one would ever believe her about this, but all their yelling could attract others.

Not only that, but Ms. Ingrid one of the most religious people ever! If anyone so much as said anything that didn't have to do with Christianity she'd go on a rampage.

And Hidan sure as butterscotch wasn't going to listen to her bashing his religion.

I opened the window by sliding one of the glass plates aside and yelled through the screen, "HIDAN YOU BETTER GET YOUR BIG FAT ASS OVER HERE RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME I WILL LOCK YOU IN A CLOSET WITH THE BARNEY SONG PLAYING ON REPEAT!!"

Everyone stopped and looked over at me.

"Why the fuck should I??" Hidan said turning towards me trying to be intimidating.

"Just get over here right now!" I shot back not affected at all by him.

He looked over to Pein who just nodded and made his way to the window ducking under the shutters to stare at me, "What?"

"Look she is a senile old bat who will not listen to anyone who isn't going to talk to her about her religion!"

"Oh and what would that be? Stupidity?"

"No and she follows the same as Alex and I, so please trust me, don't piss off a diehard Christian! You may be immortal but they will make your life a living hell…especially if you're gay." I twitched at that. The poor gay people…they don't deserve it! Oops off topic.

"You follow the same religion as that old bitch?"

"Yes now please just ignore her. I'll come out and talk to her ok?"

"Tch, whatever, I don't think anyone could reason with her."

I rolled my eyes, grabbed the water bottles, went outside, threw two at Alex, gave mine to Deidara and told him to hold my water until I was done talking to the lady, walked over to Ms. Ingrid and said, "I'm sorry about my friend. He's very religious like you."

"Well he's following the wrong one!!" I swear I've never heard someone as adamant about religion as this woman right here. She will bluntly say that someone is following the wrong religion and will burn in hell, no matter who it is.

"Ma'am please, no matter what you say to him he won't change, just like you."

"He will burn in hell! You all will!!"

"Ms. Ingrid please just go back inside and get out of this heat. It can't be good for you."

"If it's so hot out then why are you all out here fighting each other??"

Oh did I mention that she likes to spy on her neighbors? Well she does.

"Ms. Ingrid it is for a school project. We have to rehearse a fight for a project on feudal era ninjas in Japan. We can't do this inside and it's due tomorrow."

"Hmph you should have done it earlier! That way you wouldn't be stressing over it now!"

I sighed, "Yes you're right now could you please go back inside?"

She didn't even say anything as she made her way back into her house. It was just too easy to do distract her from the main topic.

After that we let them train a bit longer before we all went inside. Alex and I had to take showers again though.

After taking quick showers and changing clothes Alex and I joined the rest of them in the living room.

We sat there for a few minutes before _someone_ broke the silence, "Tobi's bored!"

"Then how about we fucking chop off your head! Jashin-sama needs a sacrifice!!" Hidan barked at Tobi.

Tobi coward behind Zetsu, "TOBI DOESN'T WANT TO DIE!!!"

"You may not want to but we sure as hell want you to," Kisame said.

"Oh be nice to the poor kid." I said.

"Kid? Abby don't you remember that he's really—"

I cut Alex off, "Alex, do I have to get the duct tape again?"

"NOO! NOT THE QUACK QUACK TAPE!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Good! But we still haven't solved our bored problem…"

We all sat there for a few minutes when Alex got up and went into the kitchen. When she came back she had the big knife with her….

_WHOA WTF IS SHE DOING???_

Nobody but me saw her as she walked right over to Hidan who was in my dad's recliner facing away from the kitchen. She pulled back her weapon and stabbed, hard.

"OW WHAT THE FUCKING HELL THAT FUCKING HURTS BITCH!!!!!! GAAAH!!!!!!!!" Well…now we know that he really is immortal, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR??!!"

She smiled sweetly as she pulled out the blood coated knife, "I wanted to see if you were immortal, duh!" Well, we aren't bored now.

"AND IF I WASN'T????"

"It would have been a lot quieter…"

"BITCH I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!" Before he even had the chance to lunge Kakuzu grabbed his shoulders and Itachi came between them. Hidan struggled to get out of Kakuzu's grip and past Itachi who was doing very well holding his own against the immortal. I couldn't help but smile thought at the fact that Itachi was trying to protect Alex—so sweet—and the fact that while she was inches from death, Alex stood there staring at the blood soaked knife. Why? I have no idea what so ever!

Eventually Itachi just let out a long sigh and murmured, "Tsukyomi…"

Instantly Hidan's eyes glazed over and he fell limp in Kakuzu's arms. Itachi reached out and helped lay him on the ground. Thank Kami that I had Parquet floors and not carpet…. Alex is still cleaning all of it up though.

"Alex?" I said.

"Yeah?"

"Why?"

"Boredom."

"You're cleaning it up."

"WHAT??"

"Hey you stabbed him, you clean!"

"Ugh! Fine, fine!"

I sat back with a satisfied smile as she went out to the kitchen and got paper towels, 409, and bandages for our injured man. MAN DOWN!!

Hidan finally woke up after about 20 minutes and the blood was all gone. He was still pissed at Alex but he let it go. No one ever wants to go back into Itachi's Tsukyomi.

Some of them started to complain of being hungry. I went out into the kitchen and started to cook.

After I fed them all ramen—I was surprised I had enough—Kisame noticed my _Guitar Hero: World Tour_ stuff.

"What the hell is that?" He said as he pointed to the drums.

I laughed—which caused pain in my abdomen from the training, "Oh that's just a game. Trust me I don't think any of you could really play it yet. You all may be shinobi, but you have to know technical stuff to be able to play that, and have mad skills like me!"

"Skills? You've barely mastered medium on the guitar and you're still on beginner for the drums!" Alex said.

"Yes but I'm expert on the singing! Odd…I suck!"

"Trust me you don't suck. Why do you think I haven't asked you to join band???"

"Because you quit…?"

"Trust me, you can sing, and I can't."

I swear my friends are deaf! "You know you can sing too!!"

"What are you talking about?! My mom constantly yells at me to 'Stop that noise! You'll attract vultures with that dying animal noise!' I can't sing."

I rolled my eyes, "Your mom thinks that every singer sounds like a dying animal! You can sing."

"Can we just drop the subject already??"

"Fine by me."

"Do they ever stop talking?" Kakuzu said.

"If they do I want to know when they fucking will!" Hidan replied.

"I think they're only quiet when they're asleep." Zetsu said.

"Ha! This girl here talked in her sleep all last night!" Kisame said petting Alex on the head. She, in turn, tried to bite off his finger. She failed.

"I do not talk in my sleep!" Alex shot back.

"Trust me, you do, hn." Itachi said. "You were going on, and on about green monkeys that will take over the world."

"YOU BELIEVE THEY WILL TOO???"

Itachi sweat dropped.

"That's nothing compared to her late night talking." Sasori said pointing at me.

"What…?" I was afraid what they might have heard.

Sasori shook his head, "You didn't talk about just green monkeys, you talked about _flying_ green monkeys that shoot sausage out of their eyes and have bad income. Where the hell did that last one come from anyways?!"

"What the hell is wrong with this fucking world???" Hidan said.

"Like I told Deidara earlier, just watch _World News Tonight_ and you will know." I said.

"So true," Alex put in.

After Hidan insulting our world a little more they all started asking about _Guitar Hero_ again so Alex and I gave in and we let them play. Of course Alex and I played first to show them how it's done.

Since she's way better on the drums than me and I'm just a bit better on the guitar than her—she always practices on the drums and I always practice on the guitar—she took the drums while I took the guitar.

We played _What I've done,_ _Misery Business, _and _Living on a Prayer._

After that we gave them some easy songs. The only people to even do anywhere near good were Itachi, Sasori, and Tobi. I have no clue how they did good; they were probably just naturals or something. Of course they really only did good on the singing…we made Itachi sing _The One I Love_ by _R.E.M._ I was the only one to see Itachi and Alex glance at each other.

I have no idea what so ever of how or why Itachi already likes her!! Maybe it's one of those 'Love-at-first-sight' things…. I hope so for Alex. That would be really awesome for her!

We actually played that for two hours. When you rock out to the oldies, you tend to lose track of time, especially when you're in the background singing along to _Crazy Train_ and everyone looks at you like you're insane.

By then it was about time for dinner. I went out into the kitchen and saw that we had leftover stuff. Huh, wonder how I missed that before….

There was actually enough for everyone, but just barely.

It was some roast that my dad had made before he left. I loved his cooking! It was nummy in my tummy!

After dinner I forced them to watch _Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End._ They complained for a little while, but Alex and I finally made them sit down and watch the damn thing!

This time I wasn't sitting under Deidara though; I was sitting _next_ to him on couch. I think that Alex planned for that! She was on my other side with Itachi next to her, I didn't fail to notice that Konan and Pein were sitting near each other too.

Once again Alex and I quoted stuff, and once again everyone asked if it was really necessary. We told them that it was.

This time, though, at the end of the movie I wasn't the one in the embarrassing position; Alex was. Sure I was kinda leaning against Deidara using him as a pillow again, making both of us blush when I finally realized and got up muttering a quiet 'sorry'—it may have only been around nine, but we were beat from the training—but Alex was pretty much using Itachi's _lap_ as her pillow. I hadn't noticed until then that her feet were in my lap—she was laying length wise on the couch.

Now it was my turn to laugh at her, but being the nice person I was I woke her up after we all had a good laugh about it. I could see in the dim light that she was blushing a lot.

"Time for bed Alex," I told her.

She nodded, got up, and ran into my mom's room to change with Kisame and Hidan roaring with laughter in the background.

I got up too, "Ok well I'll go get changed as well. You all try not to kill each other while we're gone, ok?" I was in and out of my room in no time.

Everyone went into their respective rooms. I went over and set my alarm—since tomorrow was Monday—crawled into my bed, "Night you two!" I said before I turned off the light. I'll just explain how we have to go to school to them tomorrow.

I was asleep before my head hit the pillow but I could have sworn that I heard a quiet 'Night' before I became unconscious.

Compared to what happened yesterday today was pretty uneventful.

Pein may have told us not to tell anyone that they're here, but I know a few friends at school that would just love to hear all of this. Yes sir tomorrow will be very interesting.

* * *

Me: Ok well my friends are coming over and will be here awhile, so don't expect an update until next week at the latest and at the earliest this weekend! I know, this was really just a filler chapter :T. Well! I will be thinking about what I should do for this while I'm driving to get my friends XD. They live about an hour and a half away -.-. Hopefully this other story that's swimming in my head won't interfere with that!

Hidan: One story at a time, baka!!

Me: Yeah, whatever!! Review people!!! Also! Random here but I was just thinking about it one day, how do Japanese and Chinese have spelling bees if they have around 4,000 characters in their alphabet??? Just wanted to make you all ponder that like I have been.


	12. Chapter 12

Me: Ok well here ya go! Chapter 12! Happy new year all!

_Recap:_

_Pein may have told us not to tell anyone that they're here, but I know a few friends at school that would just love to hear all of this. Yes sir tomorrow will be very interesting._

I woke up to my alarm clock playing _Love Story_ by Taylor Swift. I struggled out of the sheets of my bed to get to the clock and fell flat on top of Deidara, what a way to wake up. Apparently he decided to sleep next to my bed while Sasori 'slept' at the foot.

I was so tired and I hurt so much that I didn't even realize that I should be getting up until, "Uhhh, Abby, could you get up, yeah?"

I slowly opened my eyes to see that I was lying on him with my face buried in the crook of his neck. I immediately did the one and only thing that a girl would do in a situation like this: I screamed, scrambled to get up, blushed a lot, and ran over to the clock to turn it off just as she was singing, "_'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter and my daddy said stay away from Juliet."_

"Damn music playing!" I muttered.

"I'm pretty sure that if that's how you all are going to wake up every day, the Akatsuki will be switching rooms routinely." Sasori muttered.

Deidara threw his pillow at him, "Shut up Danna." I could see a little hint of a blush on his face too.

I only rolled my eyes as Alex appeared in the doorway, "Can't I sleep a little more??? Or at least don't wake me up with screaming! What's the problem, Abby?"

"No you can't sleep anymore and I just fell out of bed when I woke up." I didn't even give Sasori the chance to add that I fell on Deidara; I pushed past them all and went into the bathroom. After brushing my teeth and such I came back into my room to see Alex was sitting with Deidara and Sasori smirking. "Oh dear Ninja Lord kill me now."

"Pein can't help you now Abby!" Alex said and laughed. "They told me. You sure you 'fell'?"

I picked up a random object and threw it at her, "Shut up ok? Go get ready!"

"Fine, but don't do anything while I'm in there."

"As long as you don't when I'm asleep."

"You're just jealous."

"Right, of course."

With that Alex went into the bathroom and I stared at the boys in my room.

"What?" Sasori asked.

I pointed to the door, "I need to change, so out."

Sasori stood there and crossed his arms, "And if we don't want to?"

"Then I guess I'm out of luck." I walked out of my room and went straight into the kitchen, got out a glass, and filled it with cold water.

I headed straight back to my room, opened my door and threw the water at Sasori, "Huh what do you know? I'm not out of luck!" I knew I was wearing one of the smuggest grins ever.

"Ha! And you call yourself a shinobi Danna, hm?" Deidara laughed.

Sasori hissed at him and jumped to claw at his leg, but I was quicker. I grabbed him mid jump and did what I would usually do—hug him like there's no tomorrow and say, "Ohhh bad Drizzit! Bad! No kitty snacks!!" Though maybe it wasn't the best thing to huggle him to close to my chest…. When I finally let him down he just walked kind of lop sided and out of my room. I looked over to Deidara, "Unless you wish to have the same fate I suggest you get out."

He smirked, "Yeah I guess I should, un." And left my room.

I then proceeded to put on my clothing and brush my hair and such and then get all of my books together in my backpack.

As I opened the door and came out of my room I was faced with a glaring Sasori.

"Oh I guess you kinda want me to change you back, right?" I asked.

He nodded his head.

"Well then go ask Deidara or something! I need to get something to eat." I left before he could say anything only to find Kisame, Hidan, and Kakuzu tearing up my kitchen in search of food."WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ALL DOING??"

They all looked at me for a minute before looking back at the pantry.

"I asked you all something! You all can't wait until I'm done eating for me to make you all something??"

"Why do we have to fucking eat after a bitch like you?" Hidan asked.

"Because technically since we did _adopt_ you all and you all are under _my_ name, I own you all!! So shut up, stop destroying my kitchen, wait until I'm done eating, and don't kill each other!!" I exploded as my eye twitched.

"Well, once again, _someone's_ PMSing…" Hidan said, again.

"Oh? PMSing? You want to see PMSing??" I quickly grabbed a pan out of the cupboards and promptly hit Hidan over the head with it. "Please just don't piss me off today. I hurt like hell, I have a big test today that I just remembered now, and you all are starting to get on my nerves after just two days!" I walked in front of them and got out a poptart—I actually had one left. I quickly consumed it and had a glass of milk with it.

"Ok you've fucking eaten, now what about us??" Hidan said.

"Or are you just gonna let us starve?" Kisame said.

I smirked, "EVERYONE OUTSIDE IN THE GARAGE, NOW!!!" I didn't even wait for them to say anything as I walked out into the garage and opened the garage door.

They all came out one by one looking either tired, annoyed, or didn't have any expression what so ever, or looked like a cat—Sasori.

"What is this all about?" Pein said.

"You'll see," I said, "Wait here," I grabbed Alex's arm and dragged her outside with me. "Ok when I say 'go' I want you to turn on the hose."

"What?"

"I can't have them prancing around human while neither of us are home! Until I can fully trust them they are staying cats!"

Alex laughed, "Fine, this should be good."

I picked up the hose and brought it into the garage and held it up to them, "Say hello to my little friend! Go Alex!!"

The hose started spraying the freezing cold water in their direction and with a _poof_ they turned back into cute little kitties. They all started hissing at me and I'm happy I wasn't able to hear Hidan…that wouldn't have been good.

"Sorry guys but I just don't trust you all to be alone as humans yet!! You can understand that can't you? Ok well time to go back inside." I started to herd them into the house, though most didn't move. "Ok you all are going to be difficult? Fine with me!" I picked up Pein like a little baby and carried him inside, put him down, then went back for the others—I don't think that he likes that too much—most of them didn't put up too much of a fuss, but when I picked up Hidan, well let's just say that from now on I'm not gonna hold him anywhere near my chest!! Little perverted cat! Kisame was pretty hard to get inside; I could barely pick him up! So instead I pulled him in by his tail. Now that was funny!!

Alex brought in Itachi; I could tell that she wanted to pick him up in his kitty form. Did I ever mention how _soft_ Itachi was as a cat?? It's like his fur is a mix of silk, velvet, and something else soft!! Alex didn't want to put him down—at least until I came over to make her, but then I couldn't put him down! He was the softest thing ever.

"We are definitely taking turns petting him when we get home," Alex said.

I nodded in agreement as Itachi backed slowly away from us.

Konan would have to been the easiest. She didn't hiss, or whine, or try to get away, and she sure as hell didn't paw at your chest!!

Once it came down to Deidara it was a little awkward for me. After picking him up I realized that he, too, was extremely soft! I couldn't help myself; I just had to hug the little ball of fur! Of course after realizing what I had just done and where his head was—heh heh—I ran him into the living room and set him down. "Uhhh good cat…" I ran back into the kitchen and filled a big bowel with cat food and brought it back into the living room with a slight blush still on my face. "Here you all go! Food!!" I set down the bowl.

They all looked at me with disgust.

"Look this is much cheaper than the normal food. We'll make a deal; on weekends and whenever Alex and/or I are home you all can have normal food, but otherwise its cat food." I said.

Konan came walking over and looked at me with pleading eyes.

I sighed, "Konan I know that you and a few others _are_ responsible, but I just can't. You all _are_ murderers after all. Sorry."

"Abby look what time it is!" Alex said.

It was 6:55, school started at 7:23. If we were going to make it in time to be able to tell people then we'd have to hurry.

"Kuso, ok well guys remember: food is right here, bathroom is the litter box unless you can use the actual toilet with ease, no going outside, etc.! Ok well don't burn down the house! Ja ne!"

Alex and I ran to her car, got in, put on my Brad Paisley CD, closed the garage door, and booked it for school. I have no idea how Alex got her license; she drives like a mad woman! Of course that mad woman driving came in handy today. We reached the school in five minutes—it usually takes around ten.

After parking her car we got out and headed into the school, then to our lockers. Oh the joy we felt when we saw two of the people we needed to tell about the Akatsuki standing there!

Two of our good Naruto loving friends, Tyler and Jimmy.

"TYLER! JIMMY! YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO'S IN ABBY'S HOUSE!!" Alex yelled as she ran towards them and glomped them with all of her might.

"Shhh, Alex, not everyone needs to know this!!" I shushed her pulled her off of them.

"Abby there's no one here, they're all in the cafeteria like always," Alex said.

"I know but still!"

"Who's in your house?" Jimmy asked.

"Chuck Norris??!!" Tyler gasped.

I flicked him in the head—or tried to; his head is shielded by the big poof on his head known as his hair. "No baka!" I lowered my voice, "The _Akatsuki._"

Both boys broke out in laughter.

"Shut up! We're not kidding!" I said.

"Yeah Abby fell on Deidara today when she got up today!" Alex said.

"ALEX!!" I said as I turned five shades of red from the memory.

"Whoa what happened last night Abby?" Tyler said.

I punched him in the arm—earning a groan from the pain of my shoulder, "Urgh! Shut up nothing happened! At least I didn't fall asleep on Itachi's lap."

"Hey I was tired! At least I didn't cling to Deidara's leg like a Koala." Alex smirked.

"I think something happened over the weekend," Jimmy said to Tyler who nodded.

Alex and I both punched them in the arms.

"You all don't know what happened so please keep your mouths shut." Alex said.

"Fine, fine, but where are they now? Did you just leave them at your house? That is if they really are there…" Jimmy said.

"Yes they really are there, and, well you know the cats I recently got?" I said.

They nodded.

"Well they're the Akatsuki. You see whenever doused with cold water they turn into cats, and warm turns them into humans." I said.

"Like in Ranma?" Tyler asked and I nodded.

"I still don't believe that the Akatsuki are in your house and haven't killed you yet." Jimmy said.

"Do we have to prove it to you??" Alex said.

"How?"

"Come to her house after school and we'll change them back into humans to show you!"

"I AINT TURNING THEM BACK INTO HUMANS EVER AGAIN THANK YOU VERY MUCH! ONE LOOK AT KAKUZU WAS ENOUGH FOR ME!! I AINT SEEING NO MORE NAKED AKATSUKI THANK YOU VERY, VERY MCUH!!!" I suddenly burst out followed by ten shades of red added to my face. "Uhhh I mean…."

"Yeah Abby saw them all naked," Alex said like it was nothing at all.

Tyler started laughing his head off. "Does Mason know that?"

I shook my head, "No he only knows that the Akatsuki are in my house. Don't tell him about any of this! Or I swear I will kill you. Deidara's been teaching my taijutsu, and Itachi has been teaching Alex."

"You couldn't even flick Tyler in the head earlier," Jimmy said.

"I hurt like hell from all the training yesterday!" My whole body was throbbing. I should have taken Tylenol or something earlier, oh well.

"Well let's go to the cafeteria, and we'll be expecting you two at Abby's house after school!" Alex pointed a finger at Tyler and Jimmy who only sighed in defeat. I guess I was having guests over.

Walking towards the cafeteria we met up with some more of our friends who don't watch Naruto. Thankfully the guys knew enough not to tell anyone.

"Hey Alex, Abby, you all don't look too good. Are you all ok?" Sam said.

I tore my eyes from the floor to look at her, "Oh, yeah, I just had to do some yard work over the weekend and Alex helped. It wasn't fun."

"Oh, ok."

We reached the cafeteria and sat headed to our usual table, and as usual Chris and Mason were sitting there. I plopped down next to Mason and Alex sat across from me next to Chris. I let my head fall on the table with a loud thud. I hurt so much and I kept worrying what my house would be like when I got back.

I felt something poking my shoulder and looked up to see Mason poking me.

"What. Do you. Want." I ground out.

"Uhh are you ok?" He said.

I shook my head, "Ugh if you want to know ask Alex!"

I heard Alex say, "We had to do some _yard work_ over the weekend after you all left." I knew that they wouldn't get 'The Akatsuki taught us taijutsu' from 'We had to do yard work' but at least they must have known it had something to do with them.

"Ok then," I heard him say then quieter and closer I heard, "Ok what did you all really do?"

I smirked, "Taijutsu, so don't piss us off, ok?"

I felt him back off and they all started to talk about something while Alex and I just stared past each other about to fall asleep. Today was going to be a loooong day….

**Akatsuki P.O.V**

"Ok now what do we do?" Kisame said as the two girls ran out the door.

"I can't fucking stand being a fucking cat!" Hidan said.

"Oh please, you loved it when the one girl picked you up!" Kakuzu hissed at him.

Hidan cat-smirked, "Your point?"

Deidara flicked his hear with his tail, "Pervert."

"Well at least I wasn't fucking suffocated to death by her like someone! 'Course it wouldn't have been too bad I guess…" Hidan cat-laughed.

Deidara just rolled his eyes and jumped up onto the couch and layed down with his own thoughts.

"You all are such perverts, you know that?" Konan said. "At least some of you have the decency not to do or think dirty things like the rest."

"It's not our faults that they make it too damn easy. I mean they're letting us sleep in their rooms and the way they held some of you was just hilarious." Kisame said.

"Not as funny as it was seeing them pull you by your tail into here, yeah." Deidara said.

Kisame hissed at him, "Shut up brat. Hey has anyone noticed that Tobi isn't here?" His voice got a little panicky; this was Tobi they were talking about.

"Fuck where'd that little fucktard go now???" Hidan said.

"Zetsu where did he go?" Pein asked calmly.

"The last time I saw him **the girls were bringing him back in.** Then he disappeared. **I thought that he just went in another room.** But he hasn't come back yet. **You should have watched him better! **Me? What about you!! **We both should have.** True." Zetsu said.

"Shit we need to find him!" Pein said. "Spread out and find him before he does something stupid." They all looked at him. "Ok find him before he has the chance to do anything!!"

With that they all ran around the house looking for him.

Itachi ran into the bathroom to find Tobi up on the counter with the sink running.

"Tobi what are you doing?" Itachi asked.

"I'm not going to stay a cat all day just because those girls don't trust me." Tobi said in a very non-Tobi voice.

Itachi's eyes narrowed, "What do you mean, Madara?"

He chuckled, "Just because those two weak girls don't trust us doesn't mean that we have to take being in these forms all day until they get home."

"We have to earn their trust, and not doing simple things like staying cats until they return home won't win their trust."

"Who said I wanted their trust? The both of them are annoying as hell."

"What are you going to tell all of them when you walk through there human?"

Again he chuckled, "Tobi wanted to explore the pretty ladies house and accidentally turned on the water and fell asleep under the sink. When Tobi woke up he felt like he was burning and then noticed he was human again! Tobi's sorry! Tobi's a good boy!!" He said in his Tobi voice but then changed back to his Madara one, "Is that good enough for you?"

Itachi glared at him, "You better be careful. Who knows how much these girls actually know?"

"From what I've seen and how they acted around you at times I could tell that they knew the truth about you."

Itachi froze, "How do you know? There's no evidence of that."

"Itachi I wasn't here the whole time and yet I can tell. They should at least know that you killed your clan and think that you did just for practice. Why would they even try to be as close as they are to you if they knew? They know Itachi."

"Then they probably know who you are as well."

Madara looked down at him, "Well we'll just have to make sure of that won't we?"

"I suppose."

"We'll also have to make sure that they don't tell anyone of it, especially that one loud mouthed one. The one that doesn't live here?"

Itachi hissed at him, jumped up and knocked him off the counter, "Don't you dare hurt either of them."

"Protective aren't we? Is that why you insisted on teaching the one taijutsu? Smart but do you really think that would help either of them against any of us?"

"It would give her a chance."

"'Her'? What about the other one?"

Itachi jumped down and brushed past Madara, "Don't touch her or I will kill you." He stalked out.

"Itachi shouldn't be so mean! Then he won't ever make any friends!" Tobi said and then warm water fell over the side of the sink on him. "OW! HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!!!!!!!! OW OW OW OW OW OW!!" He ran around the house screaming and naked.

Poor Konan, before Tobi even had a chance to run around the house twice all the others went into the bathroom and poofed back as well. "OH DEAR NINJA LORD MY EYES! MY FREAKING EYES!!!" Konan shut her eyes and ran into Abby's room.

"Well, someone's scarred for life, hm." Deidara said.

"We should probably put some clothes on." Kakuzu looked around as well as everyone else.

"Ha! I don't fucking have to! Konan's in the other room and the other two shouldn't be home for a while now." Hidan said

"Hidan," Pein said.

"Yes Leader-sama?"

"Put some clothes on like the rest of us."

Hidan's face fell, "Hai…"

"Damn nudist." Kisame said.

"At least I can fucking pull it off you damn fish!"

"You little shit I'll kill you!"

Before either of them could do anything Konan came walking back in human, fully clothed, and with a blind fold. "Shut up both of you! Put some clothes on or I'm going into the kitchen, getting a knife, and cutting of you manhood in one swing!!!!"

Everything was silent besides the sounds of men quickly putting on clothes in fear of losing their manhood… Konan was just that good.

"Konan we're done you can take the blind fold off," Pein said after a while.

"You sure you're all done?? I don't wanna take it off and see man stuff everywhere!"

He sighed, "I'm sure."

Before Konan could say anything he walked over and carefully took the blind fold off himself. That was very un-Pein-like.

Konan's eyes widened just the slightest bit but she smiled a small smile despite herself. "Thanks Pein-sama."

He only nodded to her then turned to everyone else.

"Ok we're human now, so what do we do?" Kisame said.

"Tobi thought that Kisame was a fish not a human," Tobi said tilting his head to the side.

Kisame twitched.

"There's nothing we can do," Itachi said. "We can only wait for them to return and try not to destroy the girl's house."

"And try not to get our asses kicked when they come home for turning back into humans." Kisame chuckled.

Itachi nodded and glanced at Tobi for minute, "Yes that, too."

"Keep the house intact everybody. If anything is damaged you will be punished." Pein said. He was acting like their mother, though they really did need one. They all nodded and went off to do whatever.

Sadly, Hidan found out how to work the computer and found .

**Back To Me**

I hated today. My test was in geometry and, wow, I only knew about half the stuff. After that we had to start on an in-class assignment with partners. My class was full of preps, and of course I was paired with the worst of them all; Ashley Howe. **(A/N: That name is a mix of two names of girls from my school that I HATE! It is not a real person as far as I know. If it is, I'll just bet she's the biggest bitch ever! If not, then I feel so sorry for her, having that name…back to the story.)**

I hated that girl! She always thought she was all that and she made me do all the work. So while I was doing all the work she was rummaging through my backpack.

"What the hell is this, a backwards book?" She held up my Naruto manga that I kept in there just in case I got bored and needed something to read. It was the volume when **(SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)** Itachi dies.

"It's not backwards, baka. For the Japanese it's the correct way." I seethed. It was very annoying when people asked that.

She started to flip through it without any care for the fact that she was killing it!

"Hey be more careful with that!" I tried to snatch it away but she just glared at me.

"Why? What's so important about it?"

"Well if you must know, any book of Naruto is important, but that one is the one where Itachi dies, so please treat it with some respect!!"

"Who the hell is Itchy?"

"It's Itachi, get it right or don't say it at all! Geez if you have trouble saying that, you'd have a hell of a time saying Deidara."

"How the hell can you remember how to pronounce those names??"

"Because I have more than five brain cells?"

"Just shut up and do the work." She threw the book back into my bag.

"Hey I told you treat it with respect! Sasuke killed him in that book! That's also where Sasuke find out that Itachi didn't want to kill his clan and that Danzo made him!! It was probably the point at which a lot of girls stopped reading the series!"

"Why? Because it sucks so much?" She smirked

"Baka, it's because they liked Itachi a lot! Then when he died…when all of them died…." It hit me then that they were all doomed for death if they ever went back their world. If they ever went back, they would all die. Deidara would die. "Oh my God."

"Geez you get this worked up over a fictional character? I thought you were a freak before, but now I know it."

"I already know I'm a freak, so please don't point out the obvious." I said in a toneless voice. I didn't even hear her as I did the rest of the project.

After a while I wasn't so shocked by what I just figured out, but I still moved in a haze.

**They aren't even in their world right now. They could still live you know.**

_They're going to want to go back eventually._

**Well warn them about it, but not until you're sure that they'll go back. Don't want to mess with anything.**

_Yeah I guess you're right._

**You're still not happy.**

_He said he likes me._

**Yeah we already got over that bridge.**

_But I like Mason._

**And Deidara.**

_What?_

**You like them both.**

_No I don't!_

**Are you serious?**

_It was just a stupid fictional character crush!_

**But now we know he's not fictional.**

_You're point being?_

**That since you now know that he's real, you've gone from **_**thinking**_** that you love a fictional character to **_**knowing**_** that you love a real person!**

_LOVE? YOU JUST SAID THAT I LIKED HIM!_

**So I underdid it. The point is, you love him and there's a chance that he could love you too!**

_No, no, no if anything I like him, I can't love someone just like that!_

**True, but there is always love at first sight, true love, etc.**

_That's in fairytales and shit. This is real life._

**Do characters from books come to life in real life or fairytales? Once you find the answer to that—it's pretty obvious—then tell me there's no such thing as true love here.**

_This isn't a fairytale! I'm dating Mason and the Akatsuki are just guests in my house. Nothing will happen between me and Deidara, or anyone! Not him, Itachi, Hidan, Pein, Kisame, Kakuzu, Sasori, Tobi, or Zetsu!_

**So then Konan?**

_No yuri you pervert!!_

**Fine, well we'll just see about all this won't we?**

_Nothing will happen._

**Well what if you and Mason breakup?**

_That's not going to happen anytime soon._

**True, but what if?**

_If that were to happen then maybe, but only maybe._

**It's better than no.**

I guess my inner and I decided that I wouldn't do anything with Deidara or any of the Akatsuki unless Mason and I were to breakup…. That could make life a lot easier for me.

Too bad no one else knew of our agreement. Of course I couldn't really tell anyone about my inner. Even Alex would think I've gone insane, which I think I have, or if I haven't, I'm sure as hell getting there, fast.

Me: Meh I don't really like this one…. Abby has a big dilemma doesn't she?

Deidara: We die?

Me: You weren't supposed to read that part!!!

Deidara: Well we did.

Me: 'We'???

Akatsuki: WE ALL DIE??

Me: Well not all of you…so far.

Deidara: So we don't do anything unless you dump the dude?

Me: O.o Yes? OOHHHH CARAMELLDANSEN!! *Caramelldanses*

Alex: *Joins*

Deidara: o.e" Review people

Me: If you do then I'll let you Caramelldanse with Itachi and Deidara!!

Both: WTF??

Me: Review!!!!


	13. Chapter 13

Me: Hello! Well here's the next chapter! Not much to say here other than, sorry if I don't update quickly…writers block and such…enjoy chapter thirteen!!

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Recap:

_Too bad no one else knew of our agreement. Of course I couldn't really tell anyone about my inner. Even Alex would think I've gone insane, which I think I have, or if I haven't, I'm sure as hell getting there, fast._

* * *

Tyler and Jimmy said they'd be over around 3:00 (we get out at 2:05).

On the way home from school Alex and I just sang to _Welcome to the Future_ by Brad Paisley. So we were in a pretty good mood when we finally arrived home. That is until we walked in.

Right after we walked in Hidan came running over and grabbed me by the shoulders and yelled, "WHAT THE FUCK IS FUCKING WRONG WITH YOU BITCH???"

"What—"He cut me off, but he was really killing my shoulders with the force that he held them with.

"HOW IN FUCKING HELL DO YOU THINK I'D EVER FUCKING BE WITH THATT LITTLE FUCKING BASTARD?? MUCH LESS DO HIM!!"

"What are you talking about Hidan??"

"Don't fucking play dumb! I went on that damn machine you have and you have all these fucking stories on there about all of us!"

Now my shoulders felt like they were going to fall off, "Hidan let go, Kami that hurts." I winced.

"Not until you fucking tell me what the fuck is wrong with you and why those damn stories are in your 'favorite' section!!"

Ok now I was starting to feel my shoulders bruise, "Ow Hidan…"

"Hidan," Pein had come up behind him. "Let the girl go."

"The only reason you're not fucking pissed at her is because you weren't even paired with a guy! You were fucking paired up with that damn Konan!!"

Pein's eyes narrowed, "I said let go of her."

Hidan gave my shoulders one last hard squeeze before letting go and storming off to the living room.

I rubbed my shoulders and Alex walked over to Pein, "What's his problem?"

"He went on that thing you call a 'computer' and found a website called ''."

I froze, "What did you find on there??"

"There was an account on there and he found the favorite stories section. We guessed that it was your account." Pein said.

"Shit he saw the yaoi???" I ran over to the computer. Everyone besides Konan, Itachi, Zetsu, Tobi and Kisame avoided it like the plague. I didn't blame them. I don't like ItaKisa yaoi and Konan, well it's obvious that she likes Pein so she wouldn't have a problem with the stores, as for Zetsu and Tobi, I didn't have anything on there that had them as the main characters. I looked at the computer to see that it had all my favorite stories listed. "Dammit."

"Nice name girl." Kisame laughed and I gave him and odd look.

"He means the name that this account is under," Itachi said tonelessly.

I went white. My name on there is _Dei-kunisminebitches_. I looked over at Deidara who had a confused look on his face.

"What's her fucking name?" Hidan asked.

"Read it for yourself, oh and Deidara you may want to see it, too." Kisame said, about to laugh his blue ass off.

My hand flew to the mouse to try and click out of the window, but those damn ninja's were just too ninja-y for me!! Kisame's hand grabbed mine before I had the chance to even touch the mouse! What a way to come home from school, ne?

"Let go of my hand! How the hell could they have not even seen the name yet anyways???" I yelled at him.

"Because I didn't even notice it until now. They were too afraid of those stories of yours to even get near this thing." He gestured to the computer.

"That's the way it should stay you fish!" I tried to pull my hand away and he let it go, which surprised me.

At least I was surprised until I looked over at the computer to see Deidara staring at it and smirking! Everyone else was laughing their asses off. Kill me please? Please? I'll give you a cookie! Fine! Be that way!

I went over to the computer and shut off the monitor, and glared daggers at Kisame, "I swear I will make you eat fish sticks!"

Kisame only laughed.

You know, I think that Alex wants to torture me… "Well at least they didn't see the picture of him…"

I let my head fall onto the desk when Kisame said in a devious tone, "What picture." He was just having so much fun with this. I didn't even bother to look at Deidara; Hidan's laughter was enough for me!

"Nothing," I hissed. "At least it's not as bad as Alex's default!" Her's was waaaay worse than mine! **(A/N: Ok well the Deidara pic will just be mine, but that could be pretty embarrassing if Deidara actually saw it! Also, just let your minds come up with whatever Itachi picture you want ;D)**

Alex's eyes widened, "They don't need to know that!"

"Know what? That your name is just like mine only it's _Ita-kun_?" She was definitely going to suffer if I was too!

She glanced over to Itachi who had only the slightest hint of surprise in his eyes, the rest of his face was, well, Itachi.

"Now if you all don't mind," I got up and hit Kisame with my back pack—I didn't really want to stay in this room…it was becoming way to awkward for me, "I'm going to be in my room listening to music and doing homework before my friends come over, and Pein don't you dare yell at me for them coming over! It was all Alex's idea! No if you all will excuse me," I walked into my room, locked the door—not that that it would keep out the ninjas—turned on my laptop and started to play my playlist while doing my homework.

After about three songs by _Skillet_ I heard my door opening.

I didn't even look up from my work, "Who ever you are you better get out before I chuck this laptop at your face."

"I don't think that you'd do that, un." I heard the door close.

I let my face fall on my laptop again. "Is Jashin trying to kill me?" I said to no one.

"No, but Hidan might be close to wanting to."

"I already know that he wants to. Now what the hell do you want??" I lifted my head to look over at him.

He was still smirking, damn him! "Nothing, Alex just made me come in here again, yeah."

"Do me a favor and blow her up, will you?" I said in a deadly serious tone.

"I don't think Leader-sama would let me. By the way nice default picture, hm."

I banged my head on my laptop repeatedly, and do you know what that made my laptop do? I'll tell you! It started playing Cascada's song _Bad Boy_. Please could you kill me?

"Damn music!" I tried to get the little arrow to move, but it seems that it was a little frozen from me injuring myself. "Dammit! Why you of all freaking songs?! Well I guess that there could be worse ones, but still! You could have played _Rockstar_! It's one song away! Why??!!!" I started beating the thing with my hands when another pair came over and stopped me.

I looked over tentatively to see Deidara on the verge of laughter, "I don't think that you can solve your problem by beating the thing, yeah. You look like someone having a seizure."

I barely heard anything he said. I only felt his hands keeping mine from killing my laptop. Did I ever mention that my hands are always as cold as ice cubes? Usually I don't mind them being so cold, but not now.

"Damn did you put your hands in a bucket of ice today, hm?"

"I-I, uhhh, they're a-always l-like th-th-that. I don't k-know wh-why but they a-a-are…" Great I was stuttering and I just know he could see the blush on my face!

He laughed, let go of my hands—damn, my hands were just warming up!—and sat on my bed across from me.

That's when I remembered, "Shit Alex showed you the picture???"

"No actually Kisame's a fast learner and he found out how to get to your profile. Then he got to Alex's. I must say that her picture was much worse than yours…at least your picture had clothes on me, yeah."

I burst out in laughter, "Yeah she must have been red as a tomato, ne?"

"Heh yeah she was, and you should have seen Itachi, hm. First time I've ever seen him lose his cool even just a bit, and blush even, though being with you and Alex we've definitely seen enough blushing."

On cue my face started to burn. "Hey wait a second! YOU ALL WERE HUMAN WHEN WE CAME HOME!!!" I grabbed a pencil and chucked it at him.

He easily dodged it, "You know if you're going to be any good at taijutsu you're going to have to at least be able to hit me with a pencil."

I huffed and I was just now realizing that we were both sitting cross-legged on my bed facing each other. Well I never thought that I'd be sitting on my bed with Deidara. Dreams do come true! Note my sarcasm there. "Well I'm not going to be killing any shinobi. The strongest person I'll probably ever fight—if I ever do—would probably be some person at school."

"You never know when you could be attacked, especially since you have the Akatsuki in your house, un."

"Yeah but you all wouldn't ever attack us."

He raised an eyebrow, "And why is that?"

I smirked, "Because the whole time you all would be killing us, we'd be spouting out yaoi stuff. I might actually go as far as to put you and Itachi together—"

"Say any more and I will blow you up, hm." He said it in a serious voice, but his face was casual.

"You wouldn't blow me up." A new song started playing; _I'm Taking You With Me_ by Relient K and my laptop was still frozen…

"How do you know that I won't, yeah?"

I was mentally cursing the fact that I had so many songs about couples and such on my playlist. They were all making me blush like mad! Of course this one wasn't that bad at all…heh could you blame me for overreacting just the slightest here??? "It's simple, Pein wouldn't let you."

"True, but you and Alexis really should start calling him Pein-sama. He'll probably kill you himself if you don't, hm."

"Never! I am stubborn and I shall not!" I leaned back against the headboard of my bed with my arms crossed.

"Stubborn, ne? Well Leader-sama really hates stubborn people, hm."

"Hidan's stubborn."

"He's immortal, un."

"Oh yeah…Alex proved that to all of us yesterday…."

"Now that was funny, yeah."

"It was also awesome that Itachi protected her from him." I smiled at that.

He rolled his eyes, "What's with girls and all that mushy stuff?"

"What's not with boys and the mushy stuff? I mean according fangirls everywhere, you and Sasori _are_ ga—"

"I will blow you up." Now both his tone and face were serious…

I wagged my finger at him, "Now there's no reason for death here young man!"

His face softened, "What are you, my mother?"

I put my hands to my face, "HOW DID YOU KNOW??"

He laughed, "Just a guess, yeah."

"Well as your mother I just want you to know that I'm perfectly fine with you being the uke in your relation—"

There was now a hand over my mouth, "What was that?" He spoke like he was about to kill me, but I could see that he was kidding around…I hope.

"Jmusht thmaf fu er pa unke en urf nd Shasery's relenshaps." I said through the hand. (Just that you are the uke in your and Sasori's relationship.)

"Oh is that right, un?" His face was now only a few inches from mine. A new song started playing: _Then_ by Brad Paisley. Oh how my playlist hated my ever loving guts!!!!! KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!

I just realized our position: for him to be only a few inches from my face and to have his hand over my mouth, he had to be pretty much leaning over me since we were sitting on my bed. To anyone that would walk in now…I just really hope no one walks in. I immediately blushed like mad as I looked into his one blue eye, I could see a slight hint of a blush on his face as well, but he kept it well hidden by smirking.

I also realized something else in just one instant; he has mouths on his hands…. With the song and this realization my face felt like it was about to burn off.

"Demdmara cman mu maf mur manfd moff my moumfth mow?" I said. (Deidara can you take your hand off my mouth now.)

He must have realized as well because he immediately took his hand of my mouth and sat back on his spot—I think he moved back a few inches though.

My hand flew to the laptop, but before I could even move the little arrow—_now_ the damn things chooses to unfreeze!—Alex came bursting through the door, "Oi! They came early!!" She paused to take in our expressions when we stared at her and noticed my red face. "Did something happen in here?"

I clicked off the song, "No. Nothing."

"Ok well come on out you two!" She ran back out closing the door.

"I guess we should go out so you can meet two more of my friends." I quickly got up and headed for the door.

"Yeah…"

We walked out into the living room to see Jimmy and Tyler looking skeptically at all the Akatsuki.

"You sure they're not cosplayers?" Jimmy said.

"There are a few ways to prove it." Alex said. "We could either stab Hidan or show you Deidara's hand."

"I don't want more blood on my floor!" I yelled.

"The mouths it is!" Alex pumped a fist in the air. "Abby go ahead and show the nonbelievers!" She pointed at Tyler and Jimmy.

I looked over at Deidara. I didn't really want to touch his hands right now….

He held up his own hand, "I can do it myself you know, hm."

Since I was standing next to Deidara I didn't see the mouth but I did see the boy's expressions; I think they believed us now.

"WHOA! IT'S THE MOUTH!!" Tyler yelled and ran over to Deidara to get a better look at the mouth. "Abby have you seen this?? It's awesome!!"

"Actually no I haven't really." I walked over the couch and sat down. It was true, I haven't really gotten the chance to really look at the mouth.

"Hey Kisame look at her face," I heard Hidan whisper to Kisame.

"Yeah it's as red as blood. What do you think happened in there?" I threw the mic for guitar hero at his head.

"Would you two just shut up???" I said.

"Why? Only reason you should be fucking pissed is if something really did happen." Hidan smirked.

I stood up, walked over to him, and poked his chest while I spoke, "Keep it up and I swear to Jashin I will chop of your head, tape your body to a wall, tape your head to a chair, and make you watch every single fucking Barbie video ever fucking made and then squirt lime in your eye followed by me reading a lime with you and Kakuzu, you hear me??!!"

They all only stared at me.

Alex came over and said, "She's not kidding."

"You're damn right I'm not!" I said.

He smirked, "So something _did_ happen?"

"THAT'S IT! Where's the fucking knife???" I stormed off to the kitchen while my three friends came running after me, keeping me from the knives. Don't blame me for overreacting to Hidan! He pisses me off and I was still a little flustered from what just happened!

"Abby what happened??" Tyler asked.

"Did something really happen in there??" Jimmy said.

"You are still virgin right???" Alex said.

I flicked her in the head, "Yes I am still virgin! Gah! I can't be pissed at Hidan??"

"Abby put the knife down."

"I'm not even holding one yet!"

"Then don't go near them! Geez did I walk in on you two about to kiss again??"

"ALEX!!!!!!" I looked over to Tyler and Jimmy who were pale. "Guys don't go jumping to conclusions! You don't know what happened and I'm not even going to tell you! Just forget about it ok? Now if you all don't mind I have an immortal Jashinist to kill!" I tried to make my way to the knives again but was restrained again…

"Abby come on, just calm down! You said it yourself that you didn't want blood on your floor." Alex said.

I sighed, "Yeah I guess, but don't think I was bluffing about earlier! He will watch Barbie!! I swear it!!!!!!!!"

She rolled her eyes, "Yeah of course he is. Now let's get back in there before they kill your house, ne?"

"Yeah…but he will suffer one of these days!!"

When we went back into the room Deidara was sitting on the couch and Hidan and Kisame were smirking. I glared at Hidan as I walked by and sat down on the couch next to Deidara—note that I was still pissed at Hidan which is why I had a momentary lapse in my brain, or else I would have stayed as far away from the blond as possible.

I leaned back on the couch and crossed my arms and legs, glaring at them all.

"You ok, un?"

I jumped about five feet before running clear across the room when I heard his voice right next to me. "GAH! DAMN YOU SHINOBI AND TRYING TO SCARE ME TO DEATH!!"

Kisame and Alex roared with laughter while everyone else started to chuckle…

"Oh yeah laugh at the girl who almost had a heart attack!" I yelled at them.

"Well Kakuzu already had one!" Tobi said, "And he's fine!"

"He has five hearts Tobi…" I muttered.

"Abby-chan doesn't?" He tilted his head to the side.

"You know I could say that I'd make you watch Barbie as well, but I don't think that that would be much of a punishment for you…"

After they stopped laughing at me—damn them—Jimmy and Tyler pretty much just asked them random questions that aren't answered in the series such as: do you have any siblings, what was your village like, is that your natural hair color, and, of course, are you really a fish?

Kisame refused to answer that last one, so instead Alex turned her question to Tobi, asking him to take off his mask which earned a glomping from me telling her how much of a baka she was being by even attempting to do that.

Sure _Tobi_ was fine with taking off the mask, but _Madara_ will probably kill her in the night. Thank Jashin that Itachi is in her room!

After about two hours the boys finally went home and I put together another frozen pizza, then I went and unplugged the computer for the night so that no one would be able to do anything else that would cause Alex and me to die of embarrassment!

Everyone went off to do their own thing—which was pretty much sit in my living room and talk to someone—after sometime. I actually had a conversation with Hidan! I was very surprised, at least until he got pissy and I threatened to lop off his head if he didn't shut up and make him watch Barbie like I had threatened earlier.

He shut up and went to talk to Kakuzu which left me alone, and in that alone time I noticed Itachi and Alex talking…

They were talking about pretty pointless stuff, that is until Itachi said, "You know, don't you?"

Alex gave him a skeptic look, "What do I know?"

"About the Uchiha Massacre," Something that looked akin to worry flashed across his eyes so quickly I'm almost positive I imagined it.

"Yeah I know that you killed your clan, but that doesn't mean that I'm afraid of you," Alex crossed her arms and tried to look all cool-like. If she didn't know the truth, I don't think that she'd have ever even looked at him.

He shook his head, "No I mean you know the truth don't you." His voice was low; no one was even paying attention to them besides me, I noticed. Everyone was talking to their partner, even Tobi and Zetsu, and Tobi was so loud there was no way that he'd ever hear them.

Alex's arms dropped and her hands fell into her lap as she stared at him, "Y-Yeah, I know." Before she knew the truth about Itachi she didn't like him at all, the only reason she ever talked about him was to say that he was either hot, a badass, or a jackass, then after she realized the truth he instantly jumped to first place in her character list. It may sound stupid and totally fangirl-like, but honestly I can't blame her, because the same thing happened with me, and I know that there are fangirls out there that are way more pathetic than us.

He nodded his head, "I see."

"Itachi, why do you want to know if I know?" You know when people act way OOC in real life and freak the crap out of you? Well when Alex acts as serious as she is now, I'm about ready to scream and run away in horror. If she gets any more serious here it may as well be 2012. Hmmm maybe the Akatsuki could help us survive that if they stay long enough and if anything really does happen—I doubt it but that'd be funny to see the Akatsuki save the world!!! Getting off track…

Itachi broke eye contact with Alex to look straight ahead while he murmured, "I just don't want to keep something that big from you, that's all."

That may have been one reason, but, of course Alex and I weren't here today to hear Itachi and Madara's conversation….

Nevertheless, I was about to jump up from my chair in fangirly excitement and I was also about to run for my apocalypse bag when I saw that Alex was only staring at him with her eyes wide and mouth forming and 'o'. This was not the fun and fangirly Alex I know. This is the serious and lovey-dovey Alex that I've never known even existed!!

"O-Oh…" She stuttered, "Well then… yeah…I know about it, but why don't you just tell Sasuke? Then he'd be much happier that his loving older brother actually does love him like he used to think and then he could go back to Konoha and—"

"He needs a purpose in life," Itachi smoothly interrupted her, "If he was not out to kill me, then what would his purpose be?"

Alex went back to her perverted self, "Well in the series you know he has two goals." She held up two fingers and Itachi gestured for her to continue, "He said that he wants to kill you, and 'restore his clan'."

I almost fell off my seat in laughter at Itachi's face. It wasn't majorly OOC, but his eyes did widen a little bit and his mouth went slightly agape.

Alex was laughing her head off until she must have realized something: Itachi is also part of the Uchiha Clan and in the back of his mind probably he would want to revive the Clan, too if he wasn't on death row according to Sasuke. She immediately stopped laughing almost at the same time I came to that realization and blushed like a maniac.

It only made her blush even more when Itachi _smirked_ and muttered while staring at her, "If Sasuke wasn't out to kill me that would be one of my goals as well."

I think I broke my butt when I fell off my seat laughing my ass off at Alex.

* * *

Me: BWAHAHAHAHA!

Alex: O////////////////O (Blush)

Me: BWAHAHA! ROFL! LMFAO! ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BWAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alex: O////o that was ummm….

Itachi: o.o"

Me: Ok well Alex was that good enough fluff for a chapter? Please review and tell me girl!!!!!!!! And you lovely reader better review as well!! Tell me if this was funny and/or fluffy and/or just plain old good! Yes I realize that Itachi would probably never say that to anyone after knowing them for the little amount of time that he's known Alex and its sort of ridiculous that it would go so fast, but guess what? IT'S CALLED FANFICTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I could have made Alex walk in the door and Itachi kidnap her to my mom's room and ear rape all that were in the living room!!!!!!!! So just calm yourselves! Sorry I just had to rant about that .

Anyhoo! Review!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll get a cooookieeee!!! XD Oh and send in suggestions!!!! Alex is helping me and we've got some stuff thought out, though Alex I think I may change up the truth or dare thing; I have something else in mind for Abby, ok? Don't give away anything in your review though! XD Yeah I told her the major spoiler for this…YOU SHALL NEVER KNOW WHO SHE IS THOUGH SO YOU CANT TORTORTURE HER!! XO!!! Yeah Review…. XD

Oh BTW I was listening to Caramelldansen when I was writing the ItachiXAlex thing XD, and _Then_ by Brad Paisley is really good and if you go listen to it you'll know why that was an awkward song for that scene XD (I'm addicted to that song right now XO!)


	14. Chapter 14

Me: Well Alex forced me to update this—

Alex: Grrr

Me: —so I started working on this the day I posted chapter…whatever the last chapter was ^_^ Well here's this one!! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!2

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Recap:

_It only made her blush even more when Itachi smirked and muttered while staring at her, "If Sasuke wasn't out to kill me that would be one of my goals as well."_

_I think I broke my butt when I fell off my seat laughing my ass off at Alex._

* * *

The rest of the week went bye rather quickly, actually. The only things that really happened were when Alex and I came home and saw that Deidara had made sculptures of some random clay I had laying around.

When we saw them you know what we did?

We shouted, "NO DON'T BLOW US UP!!!" Then we immediately got the sculptures and threw them out of the house then hid behind the couch waiting for an explosion.

"What the hell was that for, hm?? They weren't even set to blow up! They didn't have my chakra in them!!" Deidara came behind us and yelled.

I whipped around, "How are we supposed to know that?? We can't sense chakra!!"

"That's because you have none, yeah!"

"And whose fault is that??? We don't live in a world of shinobi!!"

He smirked, "Then I guess we'll just have to fix that," he grabbed my hand and hauled me outside and started teaching me how to harness my chakra; Itachi eventually did the same to Alex. It took mainly the rest of the night. Good thing that I didn't have any homework or he'd have gotten it! But at the end of the day Alex and I had chakra. Of course Alex being Alex she ran at the side of the house and tried to climb it with just her feet…she failed and Itachi caught her. I couldn't help but squeal when he told her that she should be more careful and she nodded before getting up.

The day after that, after I finished my homework—Alex didn't have much to do, lucky—I went out into the living room and saw that Alex was showing the Akatsuki the episode of Naruto Abridged where Itachi and Kisame came in. I started laughing my ass off as Kisame's voice and Alex joined me. We were laughing our asses off while Itachi and Kisame were glaring.

When Hidan asked where the hell the rest of them were in all of this, I told him that they don't come in until much later, which he responded to by yelling and cursing a lot… I sighed, I don't think he will ever mature.

The day after that when Alex and I were coming home we were listening to our own CD and we were listening _Funny Farm_. Walking into the house we started singing it.

"THEY'RE COMING TO TAKE ME AWAY HAHA. THEY'RE COMING TO TAKE ME AWAY HOHO HEHE HAHA, TO THE FUNNY FARM! WHERE LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL ALL THE TIME AND I'LL BE HAPPY TO SEE THOSE NICE YOUNG MEN IN THEIR CLEAN WHITE COATS. THEY'RE COMING TO TAKE ME AWAY HAHA!

They all looked at us like we were insane—though that _is_ what the song is implying…

"What the fuck are you all singing???" Hidan yelled at us.

"Do you honestly think that you even need to ask anymore???" Alex yelled right back.

"They've finally gone insane." Kisame said.

"I don't they've _gone_ insane, they were already insane, hm." Deidara said.

"EXCUSE US?" With that Alex and I started chasing them around the house, though when we were running through the living room Alex did what she is very much known for and fell down while running… I stopped chasing them just long enough to help her up…then I grabbed a lamp and beat them with my Mega-Awesome-Lamp-Of-DOOOMM!!!!!!!! It was very fun just in case you are wondering!

We didn't tell anyone else besides Tyler and Jimmy of my house guests though…no one would believe us, sadly.

By the weekend they were officially annoyed with being in the house for so long. Sure we let them out every now and then, but they needed more exercise! So while Alex and I were doing their laundry—kill me—I brought it up.

"Hey Alex," I said

"Yeah?" She said while sitting on the washing machine, not helping me at all.

"If we don't let them out soon they're going to kill my house."

"Way to beat around the bush."

"Yeah, well what do you think we should do? I mean it's not like we can just take them out to a park or something."

She put her finger to her chin in the thinking pose before answering, "Let's do the cliché fanfiction thing."

I stared at her, "And that would be?"

She smirked, "Beach."

"That could work, but some of them couldn't go you know."

"Well then we'll just leave the cannibal at home."

"What about the evil mastermind?"

"Tobi?"

"Yeah, if he doesn't take off the mask then he can't go, and Kakuzu would draw way too much attention with all his stitches."

"Then he'll wear a wetsuit."

"What about Kisame?"

"YOU ARE NOT LEAVING MY PARTER IN CRIME!!!" Alex yelled at me.

"Your what?" I looked at her like she grew a third head.

"Yeah, he's my partner in crime!" She jumped off the machine and stared at me.

"Ugh, what crimes are you committing?" I rolled my eyes as I shoved more clothes in the dryer.

She smiled, "Embarrassing the shit out of you! Duh!"

I narrowed my eyes at her, "You suck you know that?"

"I love you too!!"

We didn't hear Kisame walk up behind Alex, "Geez what's going on here?"

I threw the box of _Bounce_ at him, "Ain't no yuri going on here, baka so just get that outta your head!"

He rubbed his head and walked away muttering, "Damn girls, I don't even want to attempt to understand them."

I rolled my eyes and then smirked when I saw what I was holding, "Alex you know that you only want us to go to the beach so that you can see Itachi in nothing but these," I held up Itachi-Boxers-Of-Doom.

"YES! YOU DO UNDERSTAND!!" She yelled at me.

I rolled my eyes as I threw the boxers into the dryer.

**Why can't she just be like every other girl and blush like mad?**

_You really think that she's normal?_

**Heh, yeah sorry I had a momentary lapse in our brain.**

_That's what I thought._

I waved off the thoughts and went back to the laundry, Alex was now helping.

I was thankful for her help until she picked up one article of my clothing and smirked the most devious of smirks.

"Alex I swear I will feed you to Zetsu!" I pointed my finger at her.

She only let out a squeal before putting the garment on her head and ran into the living room where all the Akatsuki were.

Alex was now running past them all with my bra on her head…

"ALEX YOU BITCH GET YOUR FUCKING ASS BACK HERE!!" I yelled and ran after her.

"I AM THE MASTER OF AN EVIL CORPORATION!!" She yelled while running past them all and away from me.

"ALEX I WILL FEED OUT TO ZETSU I SWEAR!!"

"YOU SHALL NEVER GET IT BACK! MY BRA NOW! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!"

My face went scarlet, "Dammit Alex!"

After ten minutes and many, MANY Akatsuki chuckles later I finally got it back and stormed back to the garage while telling Zetsu that he could eat her whenever he wanted.

Tobi tried to be the master of an evil corporation as well. Poor boy, if he didn't have on a mask, he'd have lost his eye…

Then I had to endure Hidan saying perverted comments and trying my best not to look at Deidara…I failed and turned crimson every time I looked over at him—well I did whenever I looked at any of them, but mostly him…can you blame me?

So after getting together enough bathing suits and wetsuits for my guests to go to the beach and we decided to leave Zetsu and Tobi at home since Tobi didn't want to take off his mask—big shocker there—and Zetsu…do I even have to say?

"Ok you all now before we even step out that door I'm going to be the mature person here—Alex—and tell you all right now: Put. On. The. Fucking. Sun block. Or I will kill all of you! I will not have you all complaining about it!" I brought out a can of spray on sun block and smirked, "Who's first?"

No one said anything.

I narrowed my eyes, "Fine then, well I'll just pick someone then, Konan come here please."

She looked at me hesitantly before walking over in one of Alex's bathing suits—she wouldn't be able to fit in one of mine—Alex and I had already gotten into ours and put on sun block, but we had clothes on over them.

I sprayed it all along her arms and such before walking up to Pein, "Ok buddy either you can do it and spray yourself in the eye, I can do it, or you can have someone that you trust do it and I know that you only trust Konan." I smirked.

"Why do you presume I'd spray myself in the eye?"

"Because I did!" We all looked over to Alex who had her hand raised and was slightly wincing at the memory.

"I'm not you," He said matter-of-factly.

"Fine, jerk."

"Alex, don't get killed by the big bad Akatsuki _leader_." I smirked again.

"_I'm_ trying to get killed? Yeah right."

I just shook my head and sprayed Pein, a minute later he was ready for a day at the beach! Yay! I walked over to the rest of them, "Ok well Kakuzu, Kisame just let me get your faces and we'll be good, seeing as you are wearing those suits." I sprayed some of the stuff in my hands and put it on them, they asked why they couldn't do it themselves and I just told them that they'd probably miss a spot or get their eye.

"Can fish get sunburned?" Tobi said randomly.

Alex and I broke out in laughter while Kisame punched Tobi in the face, which only made us laugh harder. I love Tobi and all, but Madara is an ass!

I continued putting the sun block on everyone, but Hidan wouldn't let any of us get near him with the stuff…oh well he better just not come running to me about that!

When it finally came down to Deidara and Itachi Alex and I looked to each other and I sighed, "Here," I handed her one of the cans of sun block, "You'd rip off my hands if you didn't get to do this. I'd like to keep my hands." I laughed and she grabbed the can and ran over to Itachi.

I only shook my head and grabbed the other can and walked over to Deidara, "Ok blondie, are we gonna have any problems with this?"

He smirked.

"Ugh, just hold still," I sprayed his back and arms, though when it came to his chest I did blush a little, but I focused on the mouth and started to laugh—we'd just tell other people that it was a tattoo or something. After making sure that he wouldn't get sunburned—I really don't want to have to put aloe on him as well—I told him to make sure that the mouths on his hands stayed closed. He nodded and I turned to Alex who was _still_ applying sun block to Itachi.

I sweatdropped.

_Really? I mean COME ON ALEX!! Sure you're a rabid fangirl but REALLY??_

**This **_**is**_** Alex…**

_That doesn't mean that she should be so fangirly…_

**And you're not?**

_I try to control it thank you very much!!!_

**You fail epically at that sometimes you know…**

_If you were real I'd hit you._

**SO CRUEL!!!**

"Ok guys into the van!" I yelled.

Alex burst out in laughter and I flicked her in the head.

"We don't need any of your perverted-ness while you drive!"

She glared at me before stomping off to the van, though she really needs to work on being quieter because I heard her say, "Giggity…"

I facepalmed, she watches Family Guy way too much. We should make the Akatsuki watch that one day…then they'd fit perfectly into American society… It's a sad thing when Family Guy is the perfect example of a country's society.

"Ok you all, into the van, again!" I said and waved them all into the big vehicle.

After showing them how to put on their seat belts—they acted like children with that!—and telling Hidan that it was necessary or else a cop would pull us over, though he wouldn't get the chance to with Alex driving this thing…a seatbelt was a necessity.

Alex and I rode in the front and I felt like a mother yelling at them to sit down and shut the hell up. Alex commented on that by saying that I'd probably hit my kids with tennis rackets when I was older…damn her!

I couldn't help making one joke as we drove there, though, so I turned to Kisame, "Ok Jaws no eating people, do you understand me?"

Alex burst out in laughter and almost swerved off the road while Kisame only looked at me with hatred while I laughed as well. Can you blame me for the joke? No? Good!

Once we finally got there Alex and I made the boys unload everything—yes everything did fit in that van including the people…don't know how…but it did—and bring it to the beach.

It wasn't crowded at all today for some reason…oh well that works for us. With more people there's also more of a chance that someone would watch Naruto and recognize them.

We set up two umbrellas and some towels, which Konan, Pein, Kakuzu, and Sasori sat down on—Sasori couldn't go in the ocean…he's a puppet…poor guy.

After we all finally got everything set up Kisame asked if Alex and I if we were going in our clothes.

"No, we have suits too," I said.

Alex and I then took off the clothing on top of the suits—

—and Hidan had one of the biggest nosebleeds I have ever seen while the rest—excluding Pein, Konan, and Kakuzu—stared at us on the verge of nosebleeds.

I glared at them feeling very self conscious since I hated to wear a bathing suit even in front of my friends, "Can we help you???" They looked away and I walked over to one of the umbrellas and sat down.

"Abby aren't you coming?" Alex came over and asked.

"Nah, I'll just stay here for a while."

She shrugged her shoulders, "Ok then." Then proceeded to walk over to Deidara, "Hey Deidara, you want to do something fun?"

He raised an eyebrow, "What?"

I didn't hear the rest as I turned around to pull out a random book I had—

—then suddenly be pulled from my spot, my book flying into the sand. "WHAT THE HELL?"

Alex and Deidara proceeded to pick me up and carried me all the way to the ocean…I hate them both.

Once far enough out they dropped me into the warm water.

After I resurfaced I glared at them both, "I will kill you both in your sleep!"

"No you won't! Itachi's in my room!"

"Yeah I know that much, but that doesn't mean that I can't go in and kill you! And you!" I pointed at Deidara, "You better just pray that you don't wake up with green hair!"

"GAH YOU WOULDN'T!" Alex yelled.

"It'd be temporary, but still…MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" I got some odd stares but just waved them off. "Now if you will excuse me, I'm going back to the shore!"

As I started walking away I felt a hand grab the back strap of my bikini, I turned around to see Alex, my eyes widened.

"Go any further and it comes off." She stated coolly.

"You wouldn't dare!" I hissed and glanced at Deidara. If him and the rest of the Akatsuki weren't here then it would be a hell of a lot less embarrassing!

She smirked and pulled a little.

"OK OK! I WON'T GO BACK!! DON'T KILL ME!!!!!"

"I wasn't going to kill you! Just rip off your top in front of the Akatsuki."

"I'D DIE OF EMBARRASMENT YOU BAKA!"

"Well we wouldn't want that, so please don't go back, I don't want you to die," With that she let go and walked off to find—guess who—Itachi and Kisame, leaving me with Deidara.

During the week the embarrassment of what happened in my room faded, but it was still a little difficult to look at his hands, for obvious reasons.

So there we stood, me trying not to look at him at all, but you know, if you try not to look at something, your eyes go right to it! I knew that if I did I'd start to blush like I had been all week and start to stutter. Of course, both of us being in bathing suits wouldn't help that at all.

I really wish that I had more willpower than I really did because my eyes failed me and glanced over at him, then stayed. Is there such a thing as eye glue? I think there is because my eyes would not leave his chest! I stared then looked over at the mouth and absently noted that it really could pass of as a tattoo, then my eyes went back to his chest and I had the sudden urge to reach out and just poke it to see if it really was as rock hard as it looked—it probably was.

"What are you staring at, hm?"

I tore my eyes away from Deidara's chest to look up into his one eye and I went silent. It was one thing to stare, but to be caught is even more embarrassing, though he _was_ standing right next to me so it was inevitable that he'd catch me.

He walked forward until he was only inches from me and I had to look almost straight up to see his face—I'm sort of short ok, "You ok, yeah? You just keep gawking at me, un."

I felt my face heat up, but then I noticed something: he didn't have on that mechanical eye thing that he always keeps on his left eye. I realized that since they've been here I haven't ever seen both his eyes so my hand acted of its own accord and did something that I would have never made it do and reached up slowly to push aside the bangs so that I could see into both his eyes. They were such a nice shade of blue and they stared right back into my hazel eyes.

My fingers went back down slowly, but lingered on the side of his face, still keeping the bangs out of his eye. I don't know how long we stood there like that, but too soon for me I felt a slight touch on my hand and ripped my eyes from his to see that his hand was slowly guiding mine back down into the water where it let go and he then took a few steps back.

I wondered if maybe I had just freaked him out. My worry must have been written all over my face because he only smiled—smiled not smirked—and said, "Alex is coming back, yeah."

I turned around and sure enough she was heading back to us with Kisame, Hidan, and Itachi in tow. Looking back at Deidara I knew that he was trying to save me from being taunted by Alex and Kisame and I mouthed a silent thanks to him which received a nod before I was crashed into by my friend.

"ABBY GUESS WHAT! WE'RE GOING TO PLAY CHICKEN AND KISAME'S GOING TO BE THE REFEREE!!!"

"Yeah sorry but DEAF PEOPLE CAN'T PLAY THAT!!" I yelled back in her ear.

"Oh sorry," She got off of me and smiled.

The whole thing that just happened with Deidara not one minute ago was now forgotten by me.

"Yeah, and Deidara's going to be your partner!"

Did I say forgotten? Never mind, it was back again as I hesitantly looked over him and he glanced at me before we both looked away.

"Hey," Alex said pointing at me, "Itachi's my partner, Kisame's the referee, and I don't think that you want to be on Hidan's shoulders while you're in a bathing suit!"

She had a point, "Well—"

"What if I don't want to play, hm? Then what?" Deidara cut me off, he had a point, too.

Alex threw him a death glare, "You will play blondie!"

"And if I don't?"

"I know where you sleep."

Deidara raised an eye brow and I just stepped between them, "Alex I don't want your pranks all over my room and Deidara she will never listen to me so please, just play. I don't want you waking up with your hair waxed off and all over my floor! I will be pissed."

"I would never wax of his hair! I'd just write 'Sasori's uke' on him with sharpie!" Alex broke out in laughter.

After them yelling at each other for five minutes we all finally decided to play. Alex explained the rules and we both got on our partners. She was smirking in satisfaction while I just sat there a little awkwardly. I just can't be around the blond without feeling awkward can I?

For some reason, though, Deidara and I won three games to two. I did a little victory dance while Alex pouted about not winning, but when Itachi smoothly told her that she did well anyways, and she went back to being very happy. Gee I wonder why. Note sarcasm.

We all headed back to the shore to eat some lunch that I packed—peanut butter and jelly sandwiches since I actually had time to tell Alex to go to the store to get shit and she actually got what was only on the list. After eating and such we waited to specified time before swimming and made sandcastles! I actually got Sasori to help me with that. He did very well; I guess that he's just good at that because of his puppet making.

Of course it wouldn't be a trip to the beach with the Akatsuki without something being destroyed. When we had all cleared the sandcastles and were heading to the ocean there was a _boom_ and when we looked back, one of the sandcastles had blown up. I turned to Deidara who only smiled and said, "Art is a bang, un!"

I couldn't help but laugh with him while everyone else glared and the beach-goers looked like someone was just killed. Well that ended that beach trip seeing as the lifeguards evacuated the beach…

Yup just your every day trip to the beach with the Akatsuki. Maybe next time we shouldn't bring Deidara…or any of them….

* * *

Me: I actually liked this chapter!

Alex: Update now. Or I will die.

Me: Yeah apparently she'll die if I don't update everyday!

Deidara: HA I BLEW SHIT UP!!

Me: Yeah, and that thing with Alex running around with my freaking bra on her head actually happened!!!!!!!!!

Alex: Good times….

Hidan: Now _that_ was funny as hell!

Me: Pervert…

Hidan: Your point?

Me: Ugh review people and you can have Hidan!!

Hidan: WTF??

Me: You annoy me, so I shall get rid of you!

Alex: Nice XD

Me: You annoy me too sometimes -.-

Alex: XO WHAT??

Me: *Sigh* But I still love ya…I guess…

Deidara: Just review people!


	15. Chapter 15

Me: Well here's the next chapter! Oh and, wow, only one of you even asked in your review why they weren't cats….

Alex: YAY UPDATE!

Me: If don't update every other day you just think I take forever, ne?

Alex: Duh!

Me: *Shakes head* Well maybe I should just not update or write for a month and make you suffer! O.O

Alex: XO YOU WOULDN'T!

Me: x] try me.

Alex: O.o Uhhh ummm, ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_

* * *

_

Recap:

_Yup just your every day trip to the beach with the Akatsuki. Maybe next time we shouldn't bring Deidara…or any of them…._

* * *

After we got into the car and tried our best not to look suspicious of the 'bombing' and sped home I broke out into another fit if giggles. Everyone gave me an odd stare.

I recovered enough to say, "It's just funny! I mean he blows up a freaking sandcastle! That's hilarious, and might I add, awesome, or should I say, EXCELLENT! Cue guitar playing!!!" Again they all looked odd at me, "Sorry I was in a Naruto Abridged mood right then. Anyways, Deidara seriously that was awesome!!"

He smirked, "Well I'm glad you liked it then, hm."

"Yeah just don't blow up my house; then I'll only be laughing because I kicked your ass."

Deidara rolled his eyes, "Yeah right, of course you could."

"Mhmm!"

Before I had time to say anything else Alex spoke, "I just realized something!" We all looked at her, "Why aren't they cats?!"

I laughed, "Alex we live in Florida, and it's 95 out right now, not to mention the water was warm today. They only turn cat when doused with cold water."

"Ohhhh."

I shook my head. Once we finally got home we saw that it was actually not destroyed! Of course Madara wouldn't kill my house… Tobi would…but not Madara.

"Ok," I said once we got everything put away and we were all inside and pretty much dry, "we are all going to need showers now, so Konan, Alex you two can go first and then I'll go in after you all along with someone else." Followed by a surprise glomp from Tobi.

"YAY ABBY-CHAN AND ALEXIS-CHAN ARE HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Tobi screamed in my ear.

"Tobi, get off, please." I struggled to say, and Tobi got off of me to go bug the Akatsuki.

"Shouldn't the guys go first?" Konan asked, "I mean, we don't want them turning into cats in the shower."

"If they do then we'll just keep them as cats for the rest of the day," Alex said with a smirk.

I nodded my head, "Yeah so go and take your showers, I really want to get the sand off me."

They both nodded and went to the showers—we only have two in case you are wondering. I sat down on the couch and turned on the T.V. It was on the news and there was a 'Breaking News' story on.

"Not half an hour ago did a bomb go off in our very own beach today," Said the announcer. I didn't hear the rest because I was now laughing my ass off.

"BWAHAHA DEIDARA YOU MADE THE NEWS!!!!" I yelled, "NICE!!" I fell off the couch in my fit of laughter. "OW MY BUTT!" I continued to laugh. Once I was done I saw everyone staring at me, though Deidara was just laughing along with me. "What? That funny as hell!"

They all just rolled their eyes and continued to watch the news, "Officials have investigated the site of the explosion and have not found anything yet that could have caused the bombing. At the moment police officials suspect either terrorists or a prank by dumbass teenagers." I broke out in laughter again.

"BWAHAHAHA!! Wait—I'm still in my bathing suit…" I said as I glared at nothing. Great, just great. Here I was in my bathing suit surrounded by every male member of Akatsuki also in bathing suits—excluding Tobi and Zetsu but even if they were I wouldn't feel as awkward. I looked over at all of them and scenes from the first time they poofed flashed through my mind again. I felt my cheeks heat up at that, and then I felt my whole face burst into flames from the fact that they saw me blushing like mad.

**You know that you love it!**

_NOT WITH THEM SEEING ME BLUSHING!!!_

**What's your point?**

_What if they ask why I'm blushing???_

**Good luck with that.**

I think that I jinxed myself with thinking that…

"Hey is she ok?" I heard Kisame say.

"She looks like she's about to pass out," Sasori muttered.

"Oi, bitch don't you faint on us!" Hidan yelled.

I shook my head, "I'm not gonna faint dumbasses."

"Well why the hell is your face so fucking red?" Hidan said.

If my face could heat up anymore I think it would… "W-Well, uhhh—"

I was cut off by a scream coming from one of the bathrooms, it was Alex.

"What the hell?!" I said but didn't even get the chance to even start towards the bathroom. Itachi had already taken off and I found that I couldn't move, "What the crap??"

"If she's being attacked then we don't need to you get hurt too now do we?" Sasori said with a smirk.

"Damn puppeteer!" I hissed as I realized that I was caught in his Puppet Jutsu then looked back in the direction of the bathroom when I heard another scream, this time I sweatdropped though.

"GAH! IT'S IN MY EYE! IT STINGS! FUCKING SOAP I WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!" Alex was screaming followed by another surprised scream. I'm guessing Itachi finally made it to the bathroom. "GAH WHAT THE HELL? AHH MY EYE!!!!!!!"

I could just see the situation in my mind's eye: Alex running around the bathroom nude with the soap in her eye when Itachi comes smashing in and her stopping mid stride to stare at him, then they both take a second to evaluate in their minds what just happened. Itachi would then slightly blush along with Alex blushing very much then Itachi slowly backing out and closing the door and walking back out to us, blush suppressed and thanking the Gods that Uchihas could be such stoic bastards.

"She's fine," Itachi said as he walked over to the couch and sat down.

I tried to walk over but I still couldn't move, "Uhhh Sasori, could you let me go now?"

He stared at me with an 'innocent' expression, "Now why would I want to do that?"

I narrowed my eyes at him when Kakuzu came over and Gibbs-Slapped Sasori, "Let her go baka."

Sasori chuckled, "Fine."

I could finally move and I walked over to sit next to Itachi. Without looking at him I said, "She just got soap in her eye, she wasn't being attacked?"

I saw him nod out of my peripheral vision and I giggled, "As long as you didn't try anything on her I'm fine."

I heard Hidan sigh, "Why do Itachi and Deidara get all the fucking action around here?? So unfair…"

I felt my face heat up again, "Uhhh right, well, ummm, uhhh, I think I'll just, uhhh, go and, umm, help Alex, yeah, help Alex." I got up and ran out of the living room to go knock on door of the bathroom Alex was in, "Hey Alex you decent?"

I heard a muffled 'yeah' and I opened the door to see that she was, in fact, decent, but had the reddest face ever. **(A/N: Alex, this is revenge. You. Will. Blush. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!)** I had to do my best not to laugh as I walked over to her, "Hey you ok? How's your eye?"

She looked over at me, "It's fine now."

"Are you in a state of shock?" She nodded. "Are you ever going to leave my room?"

"Why your room?"

"Itachi sleeps in your room."

"I'm not ever going in there again."

I let a giggle pass by my lips as she glared at me.

"Look," I said, "one million things that embarrassed the shit out of me happened between me and Deidara, and I'm not avoiding him."

"He didn't see you naked!" She yelled and glared harder at me.

"True, but I did fall on him, and that one night I fell asleep on his fucking _leg_, and I also sorta kinda kissed his hand mouth I guess, not to mention I almost kissed his face mouth, and you weren't there today at the beach…" I mumbled the last part.

"What was that?" She smiled.

"Just that you also ran past him with my fucking bra on your head!!" I pointed at her.

She burst out in laughter.

I smiled, "So can you please not become emo and please face the world for me?"

She sighed, "Fine, but I'm not talking to him for a week!"

"Yeah like that would happen." I got up and walked to the door, "Now hurry up! I need to take a shower too you know, oh and Deidara's little bombing is already on the news." I closed the door while she laughed her ass off.

When I got back out into the living room I saw that Konan was back, but Kakuzu was missing. Well now I know who's in that shower…creepy. "Ok well Alex will be out shortly but Itachi I advise you to not even look at her for right now, or you may just kill her."

"I don't think that'll be a problem," Kisame said, "He hasn't moved at all since you left."

I sweatdropped before turning my attention to the T.V. It was still on the news. "Boring!" I said as I grabbed the remote and searched through the channels before I found _Boomerang_. Teen Titans was on!! "Fuck yes!" I yelled as I selected it and wormed my way between Deidara and Sasori on the couch. I looked over at Sasori, "If you put me on those strings one more time I will take off your head and use your arms for firewood!"

Once Alex came out I just made one of the other guys go in; I wanted to watch my Teen Titans!

**You do know that you're squished between Sasori and Deidara—both in bathing suits—while you are also in one, right?**

I looked to my right and left and sure enough my inner was right.

_Oh how I love to watch Teen Titans!!_ I think I gave my inner a heart attack; that is not something I'd usually say. Oh well.

After the show was over I finally decided to go and take a shower. All the warm water was gone by now, but I was fine with it. Since I was sitting between two people the whole time and was blushing most of the time I was happy with the cold water.

I got out and got dressed after washing off the beach and walked out into the living room to see that _Courage the Cowardly Dog_ was on, everyone was staring at the T.V., except for Alex and Itachi who were on opposite ends of the room totally silent and staring into space.

_Really?_

**Really what?**

_Just because he sees her nude she freaks out and doesn't do anything anymore???_

**Is she ok??!!!**

_I'm gonna go see._

I walked over to Alex, "Hey you ok?"

She absently looked over at me then shook her head and went back to her semi-normal self, "Yeah I'm fine, why?"

I flicked her in the head, "Because after Itachi just happens to see you in your birthday suit you act like some random Hinata person! You are not Hinata!!"

She rubbed her forehead and looked past me and went red. I looked behind me to see _every single one of them_ staring.

"Don't you all have a purple dog to watch??" I yelled at them. They all turned back to the T.V. mumbling something or another. I shook my head, "Whatever, you'll be fine by tomorrow." With that I left her and went to the computer. Hidan was sitting in the chair, "Move."

He looked up at me and smirked, "What if I don't want to?"

"Oh real mature," I said and rolled my eyes, "Now get up before I sit on you, bastard!"

"Abby you know that's not going to get him up," I looked over to Alex who was just shaking her head.

"If anything that'll just keep him there," I jumped when I heard Kakuzu. He didn't talk much.

"Fine then," I said, "Get up before I decide to look up a very lime-y lime and force you to listen to me read it to you!"

"What the fuck is with you and the limes, and wouldn't you need to sit here to get to the computer?" Hidan smirked again.

I rolled my eyes again, "I could just go into my room and get my laptop."

"Then why don't you?"

"Because I don't wanna leave you all alone in the living room with a traumatized Alex! Who knows what kind of trouble you all would get into?!" I threw my hands up in the air.

After bickering with Hidan for a minute along with a few more perverted comments from him—fanfics peg him good with calling him a lecher!—and me hitting him with the backscratcher I finally got him to get up and I finally got on the computer. Good thing, because I was starting to seriously consider sitting on him. Now would that be a fail or win on my part? I must say that I think it's a win, but that's just me.

I opened my e-mail to see that I had thirty-four messages and when I saw that they were all from fanfiction and were either a favorite story add, story alert, favorite author add, author alert, or a review I jumped out of my chair squealing in happiness.

"OH MY FUCKING JASHIN PEOPLE ACTUALLY LOVE MY ITASAKU!!!!" I yelled and realized that I hadn't really checked any of my mail since the Akatsuki changed and I only had two chapters of that up. "OH SHIT THEY'RE ALL PROBABLY READY TO KILL ME!!" I sat back down in the chair and began to delete the e-mails before going to fanfiction and replying to all the reviews.

"Is she ok?" Konan asked.

"Yeah she's fine, she's just happy about her fanfiction." Alex said and I could just imagine the smile on her face. "The one where Itachi and Sakura have a kid and etc." I heard her voice fall a bit in that sentence; it didn't take a genius to know why she didn't like my fanfiction now.

"I think Itachi's about to keel over, hm." Deidara said in a bored tone and I looked away from the computer to see Itachi about to have a heart attack and I just laughed.

"Poor Itachi first his virgin eyes are burned, and then he has to hear about how people love him and Sakura being together!" I giggled some more.

"Why would you think that his eyes are virgin, hm?"

"Because Mr. Terrorist, I know for a fact that he didn't do anything when he was in his village since he left when he was, what 15?" I made sure not to say that he killed everyone… "And then he joined Akatsuki. Please tell me if any of you have even kissed a girl since you joined."

Deidara, Hidan, and Kisame smirked and Hidan said, "Why the hell would you want to know any of that."

I smirked right back and shrugged my shoulders, "I've just always been curious about that actually."

I heard Alex start to laugh in her seat as well as a few others and I just giggled before turning back to the computer to work on the fanfic. Usually I don't not update for a week or longer unless something big happens. So in my author's note I just wrote: 'Sorry for not updating quickly, but I think that if you were in my shoes most of you would have forsaken your story, so be fucking happy!!' I laughed at that.

"Why would they have forsaken their stories, un?"

I jumped and whipped my head around to see Deidara standing right behind me. I glared, "Gee thanks for scaring the shit out of me _a-fucking-gain!_"

"That still doesn't answer my question," He leaned on the back of the chair.

"For most of these people they would be way too busy with not only their lives, but with the fact that they'd have to take care of you all as well. Point blank they wouldn't have enough time and they'd be so satisfied with their lives now that they wouldn't need fanfiction to quench their dream-thirst."

"And why is that, un?" He asked in an innocent voice but his face showed he was trying to annoy me.

"Hmph, well if you must know, this sort of thing happens in fanfictions; why read one when you're living in one?" I smiled to myself at that. This really was just like a fanfiction.

"And what usually happens in those damn fanfictions?" Hidan asked.

"Well," Alex cut in, "usually the Akatsuki come here some odd way and then Itachi, Deidara, Hidan, and/or Pein fall in love with the main girl and her friends—the main girl falls in love with her favorite, duh—and well we haven't finished any fanfictions like that to see how they turn out."

"Sometimes the girls go to your world, but I've mostly read ones where you all come here, and if it isn't a total crack-fic, it's usually a romance." I sighed and went back to writing.

"So this is a fanfiction for you two?" Kisame smirked.

"Pretty much," Alex and I said, and then I said, "The only thing missing is Naruto and his people showing up randomly because of how you all got here."

Everything went quiet after that and I continued to write my fanfic while everyone watched _Boomerang_. The _PowerPuff Girls_ was on and I watched as I typed.

The rest of the day was almost uneventful. When I went into my room to finish some homework I needed to do I heard Alex laughing and something like the sounds of grown men dying. I got up and went out into the living room.

Alex was on deviantART. Must I say anymore?

"Alex?" I said calmly.

She froze, "Y-Yeah?"

"Who's in the picture your showing them?"

"Hidan and Kakuzu."

"Is it yaoi?"

"Y-Yes."

"Just make sure Kakuzu doesn't lose another heart," with that I left the living room to go back and finish my homework. Poor guys, no matter what she was showing them, there was always something worse out there.

After that Deidara and Itachi dragged me and Alex outside for more 'training'. I don't know why they wanted to so badly, but whatever. I get free kung fu training!!! WHOOT!

Today's training was a bit awkward though. My dad had these two old punching things in the garage—you know those things that you punch and kick in gyms…I'm not good at describing so use your imagination. The boys made us practice punching those, though of course I just had to have the wrong stance and such.

Deidara sighed and came around behind me, "No like this," he brought around his hands to direct my arms into the correct stance.

"Uhhh, th-thanks Dei-chan!" I said and received a hard squeeze on my arm.

"I don't think that you are in any position to be calling me that, un." He said right in my ear.

I could feel the horrendous blush on my face—thank Jashin the rest of them were inside right now and Alex and Itachi were focused on what they were doing.

"I guess I shouldn't say anything about SasoDei either, ne?" I said trying to fight down the blush.

I heard him chuckle and felt his breath brush past my ear, "I don't think that you'd even mention yaoi anywhere near me now, yeah. Not after last time…."

Well there goes my whole try-to-fight-back-the-blush-before-he-comes-back-around plan… "R-R-Right…"

He let out a laugh as he came back around and told me to hit the piece of equipment again.

Of course that was nothing compared to when I had to _kick_ the damn thing! First we had to do stretches for that which that wasn't so bad, but then when I actually had to kick it, I missed most of the time.

He started to laugh as I fell for my fifth time—if I was having trouble I didn't even want to know how Alex was doing.

"Hey," I said as I got up, "I don't kick things a lot and I only exercise in P.E! Give me a break here, Deidara!"

"Right now don't you mean Deidara-_sensei_, yeah." He said.

"Just don't laugh at me, ok?"

"I shall try my best." Deidara smirked and let out another chuckle.

"Hey I said no laughing!"

"Fine, fine, just kick the thing at least once."

I turned back to the…whatever the hell this thing was called and went to kick it again; and again…I missed. But this time at least I landed on something different…and…fleshy? Oh shit.

I realized then that I had once again fallen on Deidara much like that one morning… How in hell did I land on him like this?! I was lying on top of him, though now instead of my face being buried in his neck I was looking right into his eye. I don't know which I'd prefer right now.

I started to feel the slight heat on my face again—no t that it had even began to leave—and quickly scrambled to get up, "S-Sorry Deidara! I told you I was bad at this!"

"Hey you two better not be doing anything over there!" Alex yelled, "Abby you know better! Use protection you idiot!!!" She started to laugh—yes she got over the whole Itachi incident.

I felt my face turn orange since I knew that there was no shade of red that would even be close to the embarrassment I was feeling right then, and it didn't help at all when Deidara bluntly said, "What the hell does she mean by protection?"

I was about to laugh, cry, faint, run for the hills, punch Alex, and punch Deidara all at the same time, though Alex took care of the laughing part for me.

"I-I-I-I-I'm j-j-j-just gonna g-g-g-go ins-s-side n-n-now," I ran inside, past all the Akatsuki, into my room, locked the door again—when will I learn that won't help—crawled into my bed, then started to bang my head on the wall. "Dammit Alex I will fucking sacrifice you to Jashin!!!!!!!!!!" I cursed her name.

After about an hour of me in my room Alex came in with some ramen and then dragged me out into the living room. I didn't even so much as glance at Deidara the whole time.

It seemed like forever until ten when I announced that it was time for sleep. I ran into my room _again_ and got changed into PJs. When I came back Alex was in her night wear as well.

"Ok well 'night Abby," Alex said tiredly and went to her room, followed by Itachi and Kisame.

"'Night Alex," I went into my room followed by Deidara and Sasori, "The rest of you better go to sleep soon or you are staying cats all next week!"

I crawled into my bed and soon fell asleep, but not before laughing once again at Deidara's little stunt. I knew I'd be laughing about that for a while.

* * *

Me: Yes I know: Shitty ending!! Alex why the hell would you tell me to use 'protection' you baka!!!!!!!!!!????

Alex: O///////////////////O

Itachi: O////////////////o

Me: Oh, right…the shower thing…….MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Deidara: Now that was funny as hell XD

Me: Wasn't it so? XP Oh and if I used anyone's idea in here and forgot to give you credit, then just PM me and I'll put that in next chapter!! Heh XP

Hidan: You're seriously not even doing this yourself anymore, are you?

Me: Hey I've got something planned that no one besides Alex will see coming!

Deidara: Why Alex?

Me: ¬_¬ She made me tell her…

Hidan: -.- Wow, well what about that one idea you got from that one chick?????

Me: Hey she gave me the idea but I don't think that even she knows what I'm gonna do with that! Kyaaaa it's the perfect way to end this!

All: NO SPOILING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: -.- I wasn't gonna! Geez :T…. OH! The whole Itachi-Alex incident wasn't my idea! It was Alex's PX. Though I've got my own version of her other idea swimming in my mind!!!! Tee hee ^_^

Hidan: You copy people too much

Me: I don't copy! I take ideas and make them my own ^_^

Hidan: *Sigh* Just fucking review people!!!!

Me: If you do then you get Pein this time ;D

Pein: …What…?

Me: REVIEW!


	16. Chapter 16

Deidara: Shit…

Hidan: What?

Deidara: Abby died *Looks at Alex*

Alex: What? SHE NEEDED TO UPDATE!!!

Hidan: That's no reason to kill someone!!! I should know!!!

Deidara: Wow…

Itachi: Remind me to never take a fangirl's obsession from her…

Alex: Tee hee

Hidan: Wait if she's dead…how is this being put up?

Deidara: She finished it before she was killed, though Alex didn't know that.

Alex: PLUS IT WASN'T POSTED!!!

Itachi: Well we need to figure out how to get her back or some people *glances at readers* are going to be very pissed at us.

Deidara and Hidan: Us?

Itachi: We should have made sure Alex didn't kill her.

Deidara and Hidan: Damn…

Alex: Ok that's enough of that! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!! OH! Also! Funkybracletchick gave Abby the idea to put Deidara's bombing on T.V.!!! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!12345

* * *

Sunday was yet another boring day. I made Alex go to the store to get more food and when she came back Itachi and Deidara trained us again though this time I made sure to hit what I was supposed to. We don't need a repeat of what happened yesterday.

That pretty much took up the whole day and when we were just sitting down to eat—ramen yay!—the phone rang. Since we had on the T.V it showed the number of who was calling—gotta love DirecTV! I realized that it was my mother. Damn you DirecTV!

I hurriedly got up and ran to the phone, "SHUT UP ALL OF YOU OR I _WILL_ CASTRATE EACH AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!"

**Don't you think that was a bit much?**

_Do you want our mom to know they're here?_

**Castrating it is.**

Everyone was immediately quiet as I answered the device, "Hello?"

"Abby! It's your mom!" I heard my mother's excited voice on the other end of the line.

"Oh, hey mom! Is dad there??"

"Yeah I'm right here," my dad called. "We finally made it to Hawaii and to our hotel."

"Ohh is it nice?" With all the money my parents were spending they better have their asses in a nice hotel!

"Yes the room is very nice," my mother said. We talked for another minute or so before the boys started to get fidgety and I decided that it was time to hang up.

"Well mom, dad, I should really get going, I still have some homework that I have to do." That reminds me…I _do_ have some to do, damn!

"Abby you aren't getting behind are you?" Yes dad your AB student is flunking just because you all left. Insert glare.

"No dad I'm doing fine, now I really need to go."

We said our goodbyes and I hung up. They all went back to yelling at each other immediately. I don't know how I've been able to deal with this for so long!

After dinner I finished the homework that I had to do. Soon, though, it was finally time for sleep. I always hated Sundays because the day after was Monday…. Poor Sunday, ne?

Of course with all chaotic hell that's been going on in my house I completely lost track of the days. Perhaps I should get a planner or something because the next morning I realized that being a girl sometimes sucks Orochimaru balls! Yes I actually went that far!! Deal with the mental scarring I just inflicted upon your brain!!!

The alarm clock went off—it was playing _Hot'n'Cold_ by Katty Perry—and no I didn't fall on Deidara! Thank Jashin I didn't! I stumbled over to the clock and shut it off—why does it have to be on the other side of the room??

When I turned back around I saw that Deidara and Sasori were staring at me and seemed to be slightly twitching.

"You guys ok?" I asked.

No answer.

"Guys?"

No answer.

"Speak now or forever hold your peace!!"

Confused staring.

"Why are you two staring at me?!"

"Uhhh," Sasori looked over to Deidara who looked over to Sasori.

"Danna…?" Deidara said.

"Yeah…?"

"Is she going to die or something?"

"I'm not sure."

"What the hell are you…two…talking……about…." I trailed off as I looked over to my bed and saw it. I immediately screamed and ran into the bathroom. Yup there it was. Dammit! I haven't been looking at the calendar lately…

**Sooooo they just saw what happens when a girl forgets when her period is, ne?**

_WHY ME?!_

**This is what happens when the Akatsuki come into your home!**

_Kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me, KILL ME!!!!_

**It wasn't that bad! Just make sure that you don't let any of them turn into cats for the next few days! Who knows what their instincts would make them do…**

I just blocked out my inner when I heard Alex outside the door, "What the hell is with all the damn screaming?!"

"ALEX GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!!!" I yelled.

She was right outside the door, "What do you want??"

"Umm Alex could you umm get me some pants and eh heh some underwear, please?? I can't really come out right now!" I said as quietly as possible.

She knew exactly what was going on and before long I had the clothing being thrown at me. I did what needed done and came out in pants and my SpongeBob PJ top. I didn't even look at Deidara or Sasori—especially not Deidara—as I walked into my room.

"You two out, now." I didn't even finish my sentence before they flew out of my room. I got changed and went out to the kitchen to get something to eat.

"Oi, bitch," Hidan came up to me, "What was with all that fucking yelling earlier??"

I sent him a major death glare, "Do not piss me off right now." My head was already starting to hurt.

"Trust me," Alex said, "If you value any part of your body you will shut up and leave her alone."

Hidan just 'tched' and went into the living room as Kisame came into the kitchen.

"Is she ok?" He asked.

_Jashin does everyone have sensors that say I fell like shit?!_

**Well you do kinda look like you were just hit by a car.**

_Gee…thanks for that._

**Anytime!**

"Kisame, she just isn't feeling good today," remind me to thank Alex later for dealing with Hidan and Kisame today even though Kisame only wanted to know if I was ok…I still don't want to deal with them today! The first day for me is always the worst.

I groaned as I got come Co Co Puffs, milk, and my special cereal eating bowel—it has a straw in it!!! I took my food and sat down at the dining table.

"What's wrong with Abby-chan?!" Tobi came over and asked.

_Must…not…kill…Madara!!_ "Tobi, not now, go play in traffic or something, or better yet piss of Hidan!" I glared at him.

Tobi started crying and ran away yelling, "SENPAI! SENPAI! ABBY-CHAN IS BEING MEAN!!!!"

I twitched.

Alex came over and sat next to me, "Well someone is bitchy…"

I sighed, "I'm sorry, I'm just frustrated with all of them and, well, you know."

"Yeah, just don't piss off Madara ok? Who knows what he'd do."

"Ha, true."

After we finished eating and got all of our stuff together Alex and I headed out.

"They'd better not trash my house," I said on the way to school.

"Well they didn't last week."

"I guess."

We finally arrived at school, got our shit from our lockers, and went into the cafeteria. I was feeling really sleepy right now and my head was starting to pound. I sat down in my usual spot and let my head fall on the table with a loud _'thud'_.

"Ow," I said.

"That wasn't really the smartest thing to do you know," Mason said.

I turned my head to glare at him, "If I'm able to threaten _Hidan_ then what do you think I could do to you?!" Then went back to trying to sleep on the table.

"Don't bug her right now guys," I heard Alex say.

"Ooook, whatever… Oh yeah, Alexis," Chris said.

"Yeah?"

"Mason's coming to my house this weekend so do you think that we could come over at some point?"

"You are very smart not ask me this right now," I mumbled.

Alex acted like she didn't even hear me, "Sure but bring your own food if you're going to eat anything! I swear you'd think being ninjas they wouldn't have to eat so much!"

"Well they eat so much because they are ninjas," Mason said.

I could just see Alex sticking her tongue out at him in my mind's eye.

Half way through school the cramps started kicking in so by lunch I was just sitting there staring into space trying not to even breathe, so you could imagine how happy I was when the day finally ended and we were headed home.

At least until we walked in.

Kakuzu and Hidan were fighting over Jashin-knows-what, Deidara was yelling at Tobi, Sasori was trying to calm down Deidara, Zetsu was trying to calm down Tobi, Kisame was on my computer—on youtube looking at some Dane Cook stuff, GO KISAME!—Konan and Pein were trying to keep Hidan from killing something along with Kakuzu, and Itachi was calmly reading a book in my dad's chair—he was reading _Twilight_. I'm pretty sure that he didn't want to read about clans of cats killing each other…and twilight was the only other big book I had in my house.

Alex and I looked at each other.

"I'll handle Hidan and Kakuzu if you handle Deidara and Tobi," Alex said.

I nodded and walked over to them and said calmly, "Deidara why are you yelling at Tobi?"

"Because he's an annoying little shit, yeah!!" Deidara said as he tried to get at Tobi to probably rip his head off but seemed to be held back by an invisible force.

I looked over to Sasori.

"What?" He said.

"Good job with the puppeteer act," I said then looked over at Zetsu, "What did Tobi do exactly?"

"Pretty much Tobi wouldn't stop calling him 'senpai' every ten seconds for the past half hour **so Deidara got pissy and decided to attack him. **Sasori was quick enough to keep Deidara from trashing your house **while we're stuck with trying to calm down this brat! **Well if we don't then he'll keep crying for hours on end. **True…**" Zetsu said.

I looked over at Deidara again then walked between him and Tobi.

"What the hell?! Move out of the way so I can shut that thing up for good, un!!!" Deidara yelled.

I narrowed my eyes at him as the deadly Shut-The-Fuck-Up-Right-Now-Or-I-Will-Roundhouse-Kick-Your-Ass-Aura-Of-DOOOOOOOMMMMM surrounded me, "If he's annoying you by calling you senpai every ten seconds go out into the garage, get some duct tape, tape his freaking mouth shut, and be done with it! Now I'm going to sit on the couch, watch _Disney Channel_ because I can while you all go off and do your own thing quietly. I am in pain and I really don't want to have to yell at anyone right now, ok?" I said in a deadly calm voice.

Deidara stopped his flailing, "Tch how much pain could you be in from training yesterday??"

I let out an non-humorous laugh, "It's not from training and I feel like I've laughed for twenty-four hours straight, I have the worst stomach ache of my life, someone kicked me in the gut, my stomach just became one big bruise, and I just did 1,000 sit ups. Leave. Me. Alone." With that I walked away to go get some Tylenol, after that I sat down on the couch and watched _Disney Channel_.

After about an hour I started to feel better so I decided to do my homework and the rest of the day went by pretty smoothly—although I did yell at Hidan and avoid eye contact with almost everyone since I had to wash my sheets… Other than that it went fine.

The day after that went fine, too. I felt a hell of a lot better and I was actually able to look at Deidara and Sasori without turning into a tomato!! Yay!

It was Wednesday that I will curse for the rest of my life.

**Akatsuki POV**

After Abby and Alexis left the Akatsuki once again went off to do what they normally do, which is nothing… At least until Hidan got curious and went out into the garage and found the outside fridge and the beer….

**Back to Me**

You can see where that was going right?

I met up with Alex, Mason, and Chris at our lockers and started walking to the cafeteria.

"Abby?" Alex asked hesitantly, "You feel that too, right?"

"The chakra signatures? Yeah…amazing how after only just unlocking chakra we can already sense it, ne?"

"Yeah I guess… Do you think that it's…'them'?"

"Unless there's a ninja in our school, Alex, but I'm hoping there is…I really don't want the Akatsuki to show up!" Of course turning a corner we saw exactly what we didn't want to see…

"Abby?"

"Yeah, Mason?"

"Why are they here?"

"And why do they smell like a bar?" Alex put in.

I narrowed my eyes. "Hidan you fucking idiot you found my dad's beer didn't you?!!" I yelled and ran over to him.

"Yeah I fucking did and we got bored at that damn house so we decided to see where you two fucking go every damn day!" Hidan yelled back at me.

I almost passed out, his breath smelled like five bars all put together!

"I don't fucking care! Go back home!" I yelled at them and was then glomped by a very, _very, __**very, **__**very**_ drunk Deidara. Oh Jashin…

"We wan'ed to see where you'n Alex go every day," He slurred out.

Well there's one fangirl question answered: What is Deidara like drunk? I know I've thought it before!

"Isn't he too young to drink?" Alex said.

"Yeah he's nineteen," I said back trying to pry him off and blushing very much, "Mason help me here!"

Mason was actually over on the side with Chris; they were laughing their asses off at Deidara and I and the fact that Itachi apparently ran into the lockers… But when he heard his name he came over and pried Deidara off me.

"Thanks," I said. "Ok well now you all know where we go, so leave! Now."

"Hey what are you kids doing out here?" A teacher called.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, and shit!!!" I said under my breath. I was going to try and get our guests out of here _before_ a teacher saw them, dammit!

"Who the fuck is that?" Hidan said.

"Maybe he's friendly!" Kisame said while falling all over the place. TIMBER!!!!!!!!!! Run away or you'll be crushed under him when he falls!!! …It's true…

"Guys just don't even say anything! Keep your mouths shut and let me do all the talking!" I said.

"You all need to either go to class or lunch," The teacher said again—we were always the last ones to lunch.

"We were just heading there, sir," I said.

"Who are they?" The teacher asked gesturing towards the Akatsuki members, "They've been drinking." It wasn't that hard to tell what with the smell and the stumbling.

"Yes they have but they're all over 21!" I said.

"Then why are they here?"

"What the fuck is it to you dickhead?" Hidan came up to us and pointed at the man.

"Excuse me?" The teacher sounded very surprised…I don't blame him and I was ready to kick Hidan in the place where the sun don't shine…

"We just wanted to fucking see where these bitches go every single damn day! So just calm down we'll get outta your fucking hair soon enough, so don't get your damn panties in a bunch!"

Alex and I were about to faint from all the language Hidan was using against the teacher, you don't curse out a teacher! Though he could have done much worse… Shit Itachi just ran into another locker.

"Itachi!" Alex ran over to him and tried to steady him. Apparently when Itachi is drunk he's OOC…

"Sir," Mr. Teacher said, "I'm going to have to ask you and your friends to leave the school grounds right now."

"Hidan," I said, "You had better listen to him or I swear I will cut off your head and run over it with a steam roller!"

"Tch, whatever we don't have to fucking leave if we don't fucking wanna!" Hidan said.

I was about to say something else but I was attacked again in another glomp by Deidara, "Don't make us leave Abby-chan! I don't want to go back to the house! Tobi's being an annoying shit!!"

I blushed at the 'chan' but tried to call Mason over; sadly he and Chris were trying to keep Kisame from falling over.

"Just get them out of the school or we will suspend all of you," The teacher then walked away…wow suckish school, ne?

"Deidara get off of me!" I tried to push him off.

"But I don't wanna…"

Geez he smells like a bar and is waaaay drunk… Then I thought of something… "Kuso! Deidara where are the others?!"

"At home."

"Are they drunk too?!!"

"Just Tobi…"

"Well shit……Deidara?"

"Yes?"

"Please get off me now."

"But—"

"Now."

"Fine." With that I was freed.

I turned around to face him, "Deidara why exactly did you all come here?"

"We already told you! To—"

"I know, I know, to see where we go every day, but you all said yourselves that you don't want to be found out! By coming here you risked that you bakas."

He wasn't even listening to me anymore, he walked over to Hidan and I just sighed and pointed at them, "I swear if you all don't get your asses out of my school this instant I will castrate all of you and keep you as cats for the rest of your Jashin-forsaken lives! Now _**out!**_"

They all just stared at me for a minute before the word 'castrate' finally sunk in and one second there were four drunken Akatsuki in front of us and the next, there were none.

"Damn they're fast," Alex muttered.

"Well when you say 'castrate' to a guy not many would want to stick around…" Chris said.

"Very true," Mason put in.

"Whatever, I'm going to lunch," I stalked off to lunch. They were so going to get it when I got home!!!

And of course I always stick to my word because once I got home I grabbed a dictionary and hit all four of them with it.

"Ow! What the fuck?!"

"Damn that hurts, what the hell is that??!!"

"Dammit, un!!"

And Itachi just rubbed the bump on his head… Well what do you expect from an Uchiha?!

"You all," I began, "are the stupidest people that I have ever met!! I mean Pein tells you to lay low and not be discovered and what do you do? You go to a freaking high school! Why not just go to the mall in full Akatsuki attire and blow shit up?!"

"That would be fun, yeah…" Deidara pondered and I hit him on the head again.

"No! The first time it was funny but if you do it again people will start getting suspicious! Not that they aren't already but still!"

"Geez calm down I wasn't seriously going to blow it up! I was just saying that it'd be fun, hm!" Deidara rubbed his head.

I sighed, "If you all ever do that again I'll kill all of you! Just be lucky that we were the only ones in the halls. If it had been during a class change then we'd all be screwed…"

"That's very true," Alex commented as she put a band-aid on Itachi's bruise… No I don't know how a band-aid would help a bruise either, but Alex is Alex and there is no changing that.

I shook my head, "Well enjoy your hangovers and I hope that you drank all the beer and enjoyed it because we aren't buying anymore alcohol!!"

"Don't worry," Hidan smirked, "We finished off that shit."

"Good, now if you all don't mind I'm going to go and do my homework!"

"Just keep it down already!" Kisame yelled, "My head's killing me."

"Well that's what you get." I closed my door and began my homework.

Sure the Akatsuki may have almost messed up big time, but that's nothing compared to what can happen when Kisame and Alex are bored…

* * *

Hidan: What the fuck is that supposed to mean???

Deidara: How are we supposed to know? SOMEONE killed off the writer!!

Alex: NO NEED TO FEAR!! I'VE BROUGHT A CURE!!! *Pulls out Sesshomaru*

Itachi: How does that help?

Alex: He can bring people back to life!!! Isn't that right fluffy?

Sesshomaru: Don't call me that.

Alex: Just bring her back to life!

Sesshomaru: -.- *Brings me back to life*

Me: ALEX I WILL KILL YOU!!!

Alex: MEEP!! *Runs away*

Me: .!!! Well! So sorry that this didn't get updated sooner!! I had the worst writer's block EVER!! But here this is ^_^ And the next chapter should be out soon…I hope…

Deidara: So you're alive again?

Me: Yup ;D *Glomps Dei*

Deidara: WTF???

Me: MWAHAHAHA!!!! REVIEW OR I'LL SACRIFICE YOU TO JASHIN!!!

Hidan: Why can't I? T.T

Me: MY STORY!!

Hidan: We shoulda just let you die -.-

Me: *Cuts off head and runs to Kentucky*

Hidan: !#$%^&*$%^&*()&^$%^&*(

Me: REVIEW!!


	17. Chapter 17

Deidara: Soooo do any of you know what she meant at the end of the last chapter?

Hidan: No

Itachi: No…

Sasori: (I had to add him XD) Nope…

Alex: I DO!!!

Kisame: ME TOO!!!

Deidara, Hidan, Itachi, and Sasori: -.- WELL DUH!!!

Alex and Kisame: ^_^

Me: Lolz well if you all really want to know then read on!!! XD

Sasori: Why am I here?

Me: Because I'm having a slight Sasori fase…

Sasori: Well shit…

Me: I'm reading a story where the pairing is SasoSaku XD But now Itachi has moved into the coupling and drama has started XD… It's rated M though…yet no lemons have occurred…though one almost started if Itachi and Sanbi hadn't run in…

Alex: NO ONE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE SAYING!!!

Me: Azelf1717 might!!! So XP!!!

Alex: *Sigh* ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Thursday and Friday went by pretty smoothly—I wasn't in so much pain, and certain people didn't show up at my school, but now it was Friday night and Alex and I were at home and I was trying to show her OHSHC (Ouran High School Host Club for those how don't know). I was failing with the Akatsuki commenting on stuff here and there.

"It's a girl?!" Tobi said, for some reason he was watching this, too…

"Yes Tobi, now just watch!" I yelled at him.

The rest of the evening went on like this! We were only able to watch four episodes because of my crappy computer and not to mention all the distractions we got from the Akatsuki. Note to self: Don't ever try to watch anime with them in the house. I haven't even watched any since they came!! The only reason I'm not on the floor having a seizure because of it…do I even have to say it? I'm living in an anime!!

So after the four episodes we both gave up, went into the kitchen, Alex made her signature garlic fried ham sandwich, we went back to the computer, and the Akatsuki experienced _Family Guy_. It was funny as hell. We watched the one where Brian and Stewie go to parallel universes.

"Maybe that's how the jutsu works." Itachi said out loud.

"You mean an evil baby and a dog that does women traveled to your world and somehow brought you here?" Alex asked him…I just noticed something…Alex and Itachi were sitting next to each other on the couch. Itachi had his arm casually placed over her and she was leaning against him slightly…well since I'm nice I won't embarrass her like she does me… Maybe…

"No," Itachi continued looking down at her, "I mean the whole Parallel-Universe thing. Perhaps that's how the jutsu works…"

"It's possible…HEY THEY'RE IN THE DISNEY DIMENSION!!" I yelled and pointed at the computer screen—we were watching it online—and Alex and I started singing along to the _It's a Great Day for Pie_ song.

The Akatsuki all gave us an odd look.

"Hey," I said, "get used to Disney! Shippuuden is already on Disney XD, and they've already fucked it up! They don't even show Dei's arm being—never mind!!" I turned back to the computer and tried to focus when the chair was turned and my face was inches from Deidara's. With his hands placed on both arms of the chair, there was no escape for me.

"What happens to my arm, hm?" He asked calmly.

"A-Ano…well y-you see…you f-fight Gaara…and, well, he get's your a-arm with his s-sand and…c-crushes it…" I mumbled and blushed slightly at our position.

Now his nose was touching mine, "What was that, yeah??!"

"Gaara crushes your arm…" I said louder and then blushed ten shades of red at the now even closer proximity—it was pretty much like that one time in Naruto where Hinata came into the hospital room and Naruto jumped down from the ceiling and she turned red and fainted…though I didn't faint. I was about to say something when he suddenly pulled away.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" He said as he paced around the living room. "I get my arm chopped off?!"

"Both actually," Alex said then put a hand over her mouth.

"WHAT?!"

"Don't worry! Kakuzu somehow put them back on!" I tried to calm him.

"At least he doesn't know anymore of the series…" Alex said and I glared daggers at her. She shut up then.

I sighed as I stared at the fuming Deidara, "Well you aren't there now, and now that you know about it, you can change it when you all go back!"

It was deadly quiet now, no one spoke. I looked around at everyone and they all had the same expression—or as much of an expression as they could muster—sadness.

"They will have to leave, won't they?" Alex said.

I shook my head to clear it, "Eventually, I guess, but that's a long ways away, right guys?"

Pein stepped forward, "We don't even know how the jutsu works. There's no way we can do anything now to get back."

"That, and Leader-sama and Itachi haven't been working on it!!" Tobi said as he bounced on the couch. "They want to stay with Abby-chan and Alexis-chan!!!"

Itachi hit him over the head, but Alex and I just smiled and we all went back to watching _Family Guy_. The next one we watched was the one where Peter gets a prostate exam and sues the doctor for sexual harassment. Alex and I laughed our asses off while the guys only stared.

"Yup, if you were to live here then that's what you'd have to do when you went to doctors!!" Alex said and we both started laughing even more at their faces.

So one minute my house was melancholy and serious, and the next it was fun and awkward for some, and it stayed fun for the rest of the night, thankfully.

We all finally decided that it was a good enough time for bed, though after an hour I knew that I couldn't sleep. I sat up in my bed and sighed.

"Can't sleep?"

I jumped at the sound of Sasori's voice; I forgot that he didn't sleep. "Jeez what are you trying to do? Give me a heart attack?!" I whispered harshly.

I heard him chuckle—I can't see anything, "Well I figured that you'd remember that I don't sleep, or rather I don't need to."

"Yes I did forget! And what do you mean?"

"If I wanted to I could go to sleep, but since I don't need it I don't bother with it."

"So, what, do you just watch us sleep the whole night?"

"No," another chuckle, "sometimes I'll get up and walk around the house or go into the backyard."

"As long as you're not seen…"

"It's the middle of the night in your backyard."

"Good point." I sighed and layed back down, "Dammit why can't I sleep?!"

"Maybe because you two are talking so loud, yeah!" I jumped at Deidara's voice.

"You all just want to kill me don't you? That's why you came here, am I right?! To scare me to death!!" I glared in Deidara's general direction.

"Oh of course," I heard him laugh, "how did you know??"

"Women's intuition my friend, women's intuition."

"What are you going to do since you can't sleep, un?"

"Meh, I'll either go on the computer and disturb Zetsu and Tobi, go outside and just hang out there for a while, listen to my iPod, or see what happens when I play a prank on Hidan at night." I giggled at the last one.

"I'm not helping you if he kills you." Sasori said.

"There's no way I'm getting in the way of a pissed off Hidan, hm." Deidara sighed.

"Well aren't I loved?" I pouted when I heard both of them laughing and my eyes finally adjusted enough so I could actually see them.

Both of their heads snapped up to look at my window at the same time.

I looked over at the window as well, "What?"

"There's someone outside, un." Deidara said.

"Ha, ha, ha guys, very funny. I'm not going to fall for that!" I said.

Sasori 'tched' before getting up and looking out the blinds of the window, "Well, well, well…"

"Danna?" Deidara raised an eyebrow.

"Hey brat, Abby, come look at this."

Deidara and I looked at each other before getting up and looking too, I sweatdropped. There, walking back to the house, was Alex and Kisame, both laughing their asses off. I immediately backed up from the window, ran past the boys, and out my door to meet Kisame and Alex right when they came into the house. What the hell were they thinking going out at night?

"And just _where_ have you two been?!" I yelled and pointed my finger at them.

"We were just out, _mom_." Alex said back.

"Lighten up Girlie," Kisame smirked.

My eye twitched, "Did he just call me 'Girlie'??"

"Yup," Alex smiled.

My eye twitched again, "Ok, whatever! Where were you two?!"

Kisame smirked, "You'll never know," and with that he picked up Alex and went back into their and Itachi's room.

I twitched again before turning around and going back into my room.

"Well that was interesting," Sasori said.

"Yeah," Deidara nodded.

"Oh just go to bed you two!" I said as I flopped down on my bed and fell asleep finally! I guess yelling at Kisame and Alex can help me to sleep…

I didn't wake up until I felt someone jumping on my bed…wait…JUMPING ON MY BED?! My eyes shot open to see Alex, Mason, and Chris all jumping on my bed trying to wake me up, "WHAT THE CRAP YOU CREEPERS?!" I screamed as I flailed my arms and legs to get up, only to fall off my bed again…and guess who I landed on? Just fucking guess! Yup, that's right! ORLANDO BLOOM!!! …Yeah not really…but I can dream can't I?

My face immediately got red when I was once again face to face with Deidara…on the ground… At least I'm on top…? Yeah, no, that just sounds wrong…oh wait, IT IS WRONG!!! I screamed and shot up only to bump into Alex, "What the hell, Alex?! First you go out with Kisame for reasons unknown and then this?!" I pointed at her.

"Do you think Alex did it then?" Mason turned to ask Chris.

"Probably," Chris shrugged.

"What did Alex do?" I asked as Alex ran out of my room with a 'meep' and into the living room where she hid behind Kisame.

"KISAME THEY'RE ON TO US!!!" Alex yelled at him.

"Shit really?!" Kisame asked with panic in his voice.

"WHAT?!" I yelled.

"Today when we were walking over here," Chris said, "when we passed by Mr. Shepherd's house it was a total wreck. There was paint all over it along with toilet paper and a bunch of other shit, not to mention all the cops that were there."

I turned my head to glare at Kisame and Alex, "You did, _what?_"

"WE'RE SORRY!!!" They both yelled at the same time.

I turned to my side to see Itachi standing there glaring at them as well then turning to me. We both nodded as I grabbed my dictionary and hit Alex over the head while Itachi just hit Kisame with his hand…but then I went over to hit Kisame _harder_ in the head and Itachi just flicked Alex in the forehead like he does to Sasuke…

"Oi!" I yelled at him, "What the hell dude?! If you're going to be mad at her, at least hit her like I did!!"

Itachi glanced over at me then back at Alex, "I don't think that she's at a level yet where she could handle me hitting her like I did Kisame, plus," he smirked, "I'd never hit her in the first place."

Alex smiled and glomped him while glaring at me.

"You all had better just hope that the police don't figure out you all did it!" I told them, "Or I swear I will sell you to 'Red Lobster'," I pointed at Kisame, "and I will write you a lemon with Kakuzu!!" I pointed at Alex who fell to the floor in spasms.

I couldn't help but look over at Kakuzu and Hidan, Kakuzu was on the floor also having a seizure—they somehow now knew what lemons were in fanfic world—while Hidan just came over and patted me on the head laughing and saying something like 'Jashin would be pleased with your torture techniques'. I wasn't really paying attention because I was randomly glomped by Tobi…

"Tobi, what the hell?!" I said, out of breath since the glomp knocked it right out of me!

"Tobi just wanted to hug Abby-chan!!" Tobi said, still glomping me.

I pushed him off of me, "Ok, ok!" I turned back to Alex and Kisame, "You two will have to be punished you know." They both cringed while Alex tried to hide behind Kisame, "That's right!" I went into the kitchen, filled up the biggest cup we had with cold water, went back and threw all of it on Kisame, "That is your punishment! You will be a cat for as long as I see fit! As for you," I turned to Alex, "Hmmm… No anime, fanfiction, or manga of any type for as long as I see fit! In other words, no computer and you can only talk to Pein, Kakuzu, Tobi, Konan, and yeah that's it for as long as I see fit, do you hear me?!"

Kisame was now in Alex's lap and both of them were crying…a lot…

"Don't you think that's a little harsh, yeah?" Deidara said right by my ear.

"Hey 'as long as I see fit' can mean anything from an hour to a decade, so don't you be telling me that it's too harsh!" I said.

He chuckled, "Right, of course, and nice job not jumping out of your skin for once, un."

I smiled, "What kind of ninja would I be if something as small as that scared me?"

"I guess…"

The rest of the day went by very slowly. Mason and Chris stayed over _all_ day so it was really awkward most of the time, not to mention having a Kisame-cat glaring at me all day and try to crush me by sitting on my lap when I was sitting down. Yeah that wasn't fun…then there was Alex… She pretty much spent her day in her emo corner in a fetal position… After about three hours I knew she'd learned her lesson so I said that she could at least talk to the people now, but she still couldn't watch any anime or read manga or fanfictions, Kisame on the other hand was still a cat… Ha! Take that cat-fish! That's right, catfish!! Mwahahahahaha!!!! Anyways…

Finally at eight Chris got a call on his cell telling him and Mason that they had to go home. We said our goodbyes and ran back into the house before the police saw Alex or me.

The next day was laundry day…yippee…. I made Alex help me sort the clothing but that's just about all that she did to help me that day. Damn you Alex!! I had about six loads to do, too, which is why I woke up at fucking eight in the morning on a Sunday!

I pouted as I stuffed some regular clothes into the basket and carried to out to the garage, though halfway there—as I was staring off into space—the weight of the basket was suddenly lifted from my arms and I looked to the side to see Konan smiling, "Need some help?"

I smiled back, "Thanks, at least I have one other girl in the house that isn't so lazy that she can't help me with putting clothing in a washing machine."

She laughed as we brought the clothes to the machine, put them in, and then went back inside to wait until it was done.

So, for forty minutes I actually had a pleasant conversation with Konan, and then another hour after that for when the laundry went into the dryer and a new load was in the washer, but just as we were bringing the clothing into the master bedroom to fold it Pein came over to Konan.

"Konan," he said.

"Hai?"

"I need to speak with you for a minute," he looked at me, "excuse us." With that he and Konan walked away leaving me to fold the clothes.

_Well then…for their sakes they had better be making out!_

**Who?**

_Pein and Konan! He pulled her away right at the hardest part of laundry!_

**This is the hardest?**

_To me, yes, yes it is!!_

**Well enjoy the quiet!**

My inner was right; it was quiet in the master bedroom. No one was in here but me and a big pile of laundry.

_Well that's nice…_

**Yeah it is!! We finally get some peace and quiet during the day!**

_Yeah…but quietness means time to think and let your mind wander…_

**And?**

_They'll all have to leave at some point you know._

…**Oh, that's what you mean…**

_Yeah, what did you think?!_

**I thought you were gonna think about the whole Deidara-Mason situation…**

I twitched, _There is no situation!_

**Yes there is…!**

_No there isn't! Ever since that one day that he almost…_ I blushed at the thought; _kissed me…he hasn't done anything else you know!_

**He is a very confusing young man, ne?**

_What do you mean?_

**Hello~!! He said that he likes you then almost kisses you, and then acts like nothing happened! Very confusing…**

…_You're right…_

**Yes I a—did you just say I was right?! WHOOP!!!**

_Yeah I did because you are. I wonder why he did that…_

**You're just wondering this now?**

_Yeah…_

**What am I going to do with you??**

_Whatever!_

…**You should ask him about it.**

_No._

**Why~???!**

_Well, because…if he hasn't done anything since, then why ask him about it? I don't see a point…_

**Maybe because you're curious as hell about it?**

…_Am not…_

**Ha! You hesitated! I win!! ASK HIM DAMMIT!!!**

_No!_

**Yes!**

_No!_

**Yes!**

_No!_

**Yes!**

_No!_

**Yes!**

_Dammit when I say no I mean—_

"Need any help, yeah?"

I fell over on the floor anime style when I heard his voice from the doorway.

**Just ask him dammit!**

Ignoring my inner I got up and slowly turned to Deidara, "Y-Yeah, sure, why not?"

_Speak of the devil and he shall appear…er well in this case _think_ of the devil and she shall appear…_

"You ok? You look like you're about to pass out, un." Deidara said but laughed.

I glared at him, "So, me passing out would be funny to you?" I smirked then.

"I guess so since I'm laughing at just the thought of it."

"Well isn't somebody just a mean person?"

"That's kind of why I'm in the Akatsuki, yeah." We both laughed at that.

"Well then if that's all that it takes to get in, most of my friends would say that I'm over qualified for that."

"Oh?"

"Yeah they all think I'm mean." I shrugged.

"I wouldn't say that, yeah." He said, looking all serious but then broke out into another smile, "You just speak your mind, hm."

I smiled right back, "Yeah I guess I do."

We were folding clothes then for a minute or so before my inner spoke again. **Dammit if you don't ask him I will send naked pictures of Gai into your damn brain!!!**

_A little too Naruto Abridged, don't you think?_

**Just ask him dammit!!!**

…_Fine._

**I swear if you don't ask him soon—wait…did you just say you would?**

I didn't give a response as I took a deep breath before speaking—truth be told, I really did want to know, "D-Deidara…?" It would be the biggest lie ever to say that just asking him this one little question wasn't making me nervous, but, hey, I know that there are a lot of other girls out there that would feel the same way!

"Yeah?"

I paused; I didn't really know how to ask him… I should have thought about that before starting the question should I? Oh well, here goes nothing… "W-Why…did you…umm…tell me that you…uhhh…umm…er…" I trailed off, dammit!

"You know I can't answer a question unless you actually ask it, yeah." Deidara said and I looked over to see that he wasn't annoyed; in fact he was smiling at my stuttering!

I sighed, "Why did you tell me that you liked me…?" I could feel my face heating up, "I mean…you knew I was already with Mason, so…why?" For a moment he didn't say anything. I looked up to him to see that he was smiling at my stuttering, damn him…

He made a thoughtful face, "Well I guess because…I'm just not the kind of guy to not tell a girl I like her when it's obvious I do. I mean, sure, you're with that guy—no I don't remember his name—but that wouldn't stop me from telling you. I'm a big boy and I can get over it if you stay with him." The whole time he was talking I only stared at him. "I don't like to keep things to myself. I've just always been the kind of guy to speak his mind no matter what was on it. You can guess that that got me into a lot of trouble at times."

I shook my head, "But…"

"But what, yeah?"

"But…sure you're fine with me knowing, but in case you didn't know, it's been sort of confusing for me!" I was getting a little annoyed but calmed myself.

He laughed, "I only told you that I liked you, not that I wanted you to just up and leave the guy! I already told you, I can't keep things to myself, it's just too hard."

"Yeah but—"

He silenced me by putting his finger over my mouth like a mother would to their child, "I only wanted you to know how I felt so that you knew that in case he wasn't there for you, then I would be, ok?"

I stared at him and let what he just said soak into my brain.

_He'd be there for me incase Mason wasn't?_

"Actually," Deidara chuckled as he stood straight again—yes I am just that short to where he had to lean down to shut me up! "Only recently did I figure out that I wanted to be there for you if he wasn't, but I think it still counts for back then, don't you, yeah?"

I didn't know how he could be so serious about all this while I was just staring at him, blushing like a bride on her wedding day…ok bad comparison for this situation!

Deidara turned towards the bed, "Well looks like we're done."

I looked over too and saw that we were. Deidara must have done the rest of it while telling me his explanation… He picked up half the stuff—ninja abilities and such—and walked out of the room with them leaving me with the stuff that belonged in the master bedroom—Pein, Hidan, and Kakuzu's shit, Konan just wore some of my and Alex's spared shit—while I just stared off into space.

After a minute the shock finally passed and I couldn't help myself, I smiled as I stared at the doorway before putting away the clothes.

* * *

Me: DID THE LAST PART SUCK EGGS?! WHAT ABOUT THE WHOLE THING?! I THINK IT DID! DAMMIT!!!!

Alex: Someone is a little hyper…

Me: MY THROAT HURTS LEAVE ME ALONE! T.T

Deidara: …

Me: What's up with you?!

Deidara: WHY WOULD I SAY THAT SHIT?!

Me: Because it's my story ^_^

Deidara: DAMN YOU!!

Me: Love you too!!

Deidara: -.-

Me: OH! Hey guys! Me and my friend Anake might be making one of those random crack filled Akatsuki stories that are written in chat-form. Yeah…one day we were just IMing and somehow the Akatsuki got involved and lots of stuff happened… She wouldn't let me glomp anyone though T.T

Deidara: Mostly me…

Me: Yeah…also! I'm trying to make a little random crack-filled thing like when the Akatsuki have a chat room and then an OC goes into the chat room and such… I'm trying to put it in a sort-of-story-format to see if it'll be kicked off!! It's really just an experiment thing ;D. I just have to get used to typing with sooooo many people in one chat room… Should be fun XO

Hidan: STOP RAMBLING!!!

Me: I WILL IF I WANT TO!!!

Hidan: *Glares*

Me: Please review!! I need to know if this sucked as much as I think it did!! Please! Thank you! Ja ne! I'll give you, ummm, Itachi if you review!!

Itachi: What? *Wasn't paying attention*

Me: Ja ne!!!! Oh and, by the way, right when I started typing Deidara's 'explanation' _Then_ by Brad Paisley started to play… I giggled to myself before finding it odd XP I just thought I'd tell ya ;D OH!! Go and read the new oneshot I posted!!!! Please?!!! I need to know if it's good or not!!!! Arigato!!!


	18. Chapter 18

Me: Ok well here's the next chapter!!! I just want to say something real quick about this one.

Do you all remember the one chapter where Abby was singing to her iPod? WELL! I kinda gave you a hint as to what will happen in this chapter in one of those songs! They were _Haunted_ by evanescence, _White Liar_ by Miranda Lambert, and _I Need You_ by Tim McGraw XD. Guess which one is the hint and see if you got it right!!

Hidan: And if they get it right?

Me: They get a cookie ^_^

Hidan: You are no good with prizes are you?

Me: Nope XP

Deidara: Wow…

Me: Well whatever you two! Just read on reader!! I hope you like this chapter ^-^ And thank you all sooooo much for all the nice reviews!! We've finally hit 200 and are 2,000+ hits more than my other story _Dawn_!! Please don't feel the need to go read that though T.T It was horrible and I don't feel like reading more shit about how bad it was e.e"

Deidara: STOP RAMBLING!!!

Me: FINE GEEZ!!! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

I didn't tell Alex about what Deidara told me—mostly because it never really crossed my mind to tell her, I guess—and I don't think that Deidara told anyone else either, but I think it was just mostly because we didn't feel the need to tell anyone. It's not like the whole Akatsuki needed to know about what was going on between me and Deidara! Alex should know but, like I said, I forgot to tell her…

The rest of Sunday went pretty well. Alex and I had another training session and the day was, as I just said, going very well. At least until they all had to take showers…minus Kisame who was still a cat. Halfway through them all taking showers Alex and I were in my room when we heard a scream. We ran out of my room to see Hidan running around my house yelling, "It fucking burns! It burns!!"

It took us a moment to realize that he was naked… He got soap in his eye…

Alex and I immediately screamed and ran back into my room.

"I thought he was supposed to like pain!!" Alex said.

"Well getting soap in your eye isn't really like all the other things that Hidan usually does, now is it??" I replied. "Jashin I don't know if that was a fail or win for us!!!"

Alex and I were silent before mumbling, "Win…"

After about five minutes we were told that it was ok to come out of the room. When we got out into the living room I sighed, "What is it with this house and soap? From now on we're buying tear-free shampoo!"

Monday and Tuesday passed pretty calmly, though I did find it pretty awesome when Alex stumbled upon GAC and CMT on the T.V **(A/N: Lolz I just realized that T.V looks like a sad Deidara face!! …Sorry…On with the show/story!!!)** and played that while we did our homework. Actually Alex was the one doing her homework while I was singing along the songs like _Southern Voice, Best Days, The Truth, Highway 20 Ride, Why Don't We Just Dance, _and _Cowboy Casanova._ It was actually pretty funny because the Akatsuki liked some of the songs! Alex and I were both surprised but just considered it a stroke of luck since, now that Alex has found the channel, we'll be playing the songs a lot now.

Then came Wednesday, you know a lot of things have been happening on Wednesdays haven't they? The Akatsuki came to school on a Wednesday last week. It was a Wednesday right? Whatever… The point is it was a Wednesday now!

"Abby…!" Alex whined.

I turned to see her sitting on the couch with the Kisame catfish, "What is it Alex? We have to get going or we'll be late you know!"

She pouted, "I think that he's been tortured enough."

"Who?"

Alex nodded down to Kisame.

"Oh…fine! Kisame you know that if Alex wasn't making me, I wouldn't turn you back for another month!"

"I'm not making you!"

"Alex," I said as I walked into the kitchen and yelled from there, "If I didn't do this now, then when I finally did turn him back, you both would somehow make my life a living hell involving a certain blond terrorist!" I came back into the living room and looked over at Deidara who just laughed at that and I couldn't help but laugh, too. I walked over to the couch, pulled Kisame onto the floor, and dumped the warm water on him and with a _poof_ I had a full grown Kisame in front of me. A full grown…naked…Kisame… "MY EYES!!!" I ran to get my backpack and flew out the door, "YOU ALL HAD BETTER CLEAN UP THAT WATER!!" Was the last thing that I yelled before I climbed into Alex's car with her not far behind me.

"You could have at least made one of them do that!!" Alex yelled at me.

I rolled my eyes, "So I forgot that when they turn back, they're naked, sue me." She glared at me, "Don't pretend that you forgot either, Alex! Now just drive, I don't want to be late, dammit!"

She giggled at my fury before pulling out of the driveway and off we went to school.

When we got there, though, we were both twitching now from the fishy sight we just saw—for me it was the second fucking time! So when we got to our usual table with Chris and Mason, we must have looked like we were having seizures…

"Are you two ok?" Mason asked.

We didn't say anything; we just sat down and bashed our heads into the lunch tables.

"I think we can take that as a 'no'." Chris said before laughing. Alex just flicked him off as she tried to get the blue image out of her head, same as me.

By the time class had started I was still twitching, so in English I was twitching the whole time… My teacher thought I was having a spasm while the kids in the class just looked at me oddly. Well they were all preps so that could be a contributing factor for their stupidity. I just glared at all of them and when one of the kids asked me why I was being a spaz I just said, "Well maybe because I saw something this morning that would make your eyes burn out of your sockets! The only reason they didn't burn out of mine is because I'm just awesome like that!" With that the person gave me a look and went back to what they were doing. I loved that I had the power to scare them away! Mwahahaha!! Yeah laughing to yourself maniacally probably not only scares them but your friends too, ne?

As you can guess, by the end of the day people were giving both Alex and me odd looks, but by then we weren't twitching anymore, though it would probably ensue again once we got home…

**Don't you think you're overreacting a little?**

_Well what do you expect when you come face to face with Kisame's… I'm not even going to finish that sentence…_

**It's best that you don't.**

_Shhh you're distracting me!_

**You're molding clay!!**

_Does Deidara get distracted when he molds his clay? I think not!_

**Wow, just wow…**

I loved that I had this class last. It's just nice to leave school on a fun note, you know? I don't have any friends in this class, but I don't really mind. I like being alone sometimes; it gives me time to think.

_Gotta pee!!_

**I didn't need to know that.**

_Well you are me, so you have no choice in the matter._ I raised my clay-covered hand and Ms. Thomas came over.

"Yes Abby?"

"Can I go pee, please?" I said and the class around me started to giggle while the teacher just sighed.

"Yes, just wash your hands first, and hurry up." She said looking at the clock; it was almost time to go home.

I nodded and went to wash my hands of the clay, which only made me have to pee even more… I ran from the sink, grabbed the pass and made a mad dash to the lavatory and in that mad dash I didn't notice Mason and a certain prep, but I sure did notice on my way back.

Just as I was about to round the corner I heard Ashley Howe speaking, "Ok, but still, why not just dump her? I mean it sounds to me that she's just a big slut since she has all those guys in her house."

"Yeah but even if they're all there I'm pretty sure that she'd only be doing one of them." I heard Mason say and I immediately froze._ What are they talking about? Who are they talking about?!_

"Well then don't keep dating her if she's cheating on you!"

"I don't think Abby's cheated on me _yet_…but I can just tell that it's coming soon," Mason said and I felt like I'd just been punched in the gut. _I thought he said he trusted me!! What the fuck is going on, dammit?!!?!?!?!_

"Well since she's going to eventually…" Ashley trailed off and I peeked around the corner to see both of them.

Mason was smirking and leaned towards her, "Then I guess I still have you…" With that he kissed her and when he pulled back they were both smiling.

I couldn't watch anymore, I turned around and went the long way back to class. I couldn't look at either of them. I made it back to class and just sat down as what just happened started to sink in.

He cheated on me… He said he trusted me… He said that he loved me dammit! I mean sure in high school that doesn't really mean anything, but still! I was pissed now. No, not pissed, I was irate, angry, pissed, furious, cheesed off, I don't know a word that couldn't describe just how mad I was right then. I just wanted to punch a puppy right then! I don't know how long I sat there, but finally the bell rang and I ran out of there faster than anything…and right past _him_. I didn't even spare him a glance. I'm surprised that I didn't punch him right then and there. I ran to the student parking lot where Alex was waiting by the car and she saw how furious I was.

"Abby what's wrong?!" I could hear the worry in her voice and when I glanced up I saw it all over her face.

"Oh nothing," I said so bitterly and with such sarcasm that Alex winced, "Just that I found out, oh, ten minutes ago that the person I've been dating for months is nothing but a fucking bastard who doesn't trust the one person in the world that he should never doubt, and just that I've found a whole fucking new reason to hate those fucking stupid, immoral, selfish, slutty, and inhuman bitches called preps!" I grabbed her keys, unlocked the door, got in then threw the keys in the driver seat.

Alex quickly got in on the other side, "What the fuck did Mason do?!"

I could swear that I was shaking with rage, "I saw him Alex! I saw him! He fucking told that bitch Ashley Howe that he didn't trust me and then fucking kissed her Alex!" She didn't say anything. What could she say? I sighed but still said with edge in my voice, "I'm sorry to take this out on you, just drive us home, ok?" She did nothing but nod and start up the car. Whether it took us five minutes or five hours to get home, I didn't care because to me one second we were in the school and the next, we were at home. I threw open the door and didn't even bother with my school stuff. I just ran, ran into the garage and threw open the garage door before running through the house to my room while trying to dodge everything and everyone. I got to my door threw it open as well and went in before anyone could even so much as say my name to me. I slammed it and locked the door. I knew that wouldn't help but if anyone wanted in they'd find out that coming in right now just wasn't going to work out.

I paced. I paced around my room trying to collect my thoughts.

_I never even saw it coming! There were no signs! How could this…_

My inner was quiet, or, to be more precise, it was like she wasn't even there.

_Everyone is leaving me!_ I couldn't take it anymore, I couldn't hold in this anger. I walked right over to one of my walls and let my fist fly. My fist connecting with the wall and letting out just a bit of that anger was one of the greatest feelings I have felt in a while. So, I did it again, and again, and again. I threw a fist at the wall and then the other over and over and over again until the wall started to break—I was using chakra in my punches, unbeknownst to me because I know that I'm not strong enough yet to break a wall by pure strength—and my fists scratched against the broken wall making the skin turn raw and I felt a bit of liquid on my skin there as well as on my face. My anger was being let go in my punches and the emotion that was hiding under it was coming to the surface—hurt, sadness, pain. I was crying now but I kept punching; at least until someone came up behind me and grabbed my fists, stopping me.

I didn't need them to speak to know who it was, but they did anyways, "Alex told me, yeah…" he paused, making sure I wasn't going to hurt the innocent wall anymore, "She only told me…"

I couldn't speak, the lump in my throat made me mute so I did the only thing I knew to do: I let it out. I let out the quiet sobs as Deidara pulled our hands in to my chest before wrapping his own arms around me. We didn't speak. What could we say? I turned around so that I could bury my face in his shirt as I let out louder sobs. Never had I wanted to ever cry in front of a boy, much less this one! But here I was, using him for support as I cried.

I think that the thing that hurt me the most was the fact that Mason said he trusted me, when, in reality, he had lied just to keep me around and that he'd lied about how he 'loved me' and how he just _lied_ to me. Maybe if he wasn't my first fucking boyfriend it wouldn't hurt so much, but he is, so it does. Can I really be blamed? Can I honestly be blamed for overreacting like this when this hurt is all new to me?

I don't know how long I sat there in Deidara's arms but I eventually stopped crying and just sat there on the floor with him before I spoke, "I guess you were right…"

He let out a laugh, "How so, hm?"

"You said that you'd be there for me if he wasn't, and you were right…"

"I don't know whether I should be happy or not, yeah."

"You should."

"But if I wasn't right then you wouldn't have been hurt in the first place…"

I shook my head, "No, now that I'm thinking a bit clearer I can honestly say that I'm happy I found out… I wouldn't want to be caught dead dating someone like him."

"Someone who cheats, un?"

"No," I shook my head again, "someone who lies. He told me that he trusted me not to do anything with…" I paused; did I really want to have him know that I really did like him as much as he likes me? "With…you…" The answer was pretty obvious to me: yes. I really do want him to know, especially now.

"And he didn't believe you?"

"Apparently not, but oh well I guess."

Deidara was silent for a minute before speaking again, "I don't want to sound all cliché and cheesy here, but, you do know that someone like you doesn't deserve someone like him, hm."

I laughed, "Usually it's the other way around, as in 'he doesn't deserve you'."

"Yeah, well you don't deserve a guy like him, un. Sure people always say 'he doesn't deserve you' but they never stop to think what kind of guy the girl deserves, you know?"

"And I thought blonds were supposed to be stupid."

He flicked me in the head.

I flicked him back getting some of my humor back, "You flick me I flick you right?"

He smiled, "Yeah I guess so, hm."

It was so odd to me how just seconds ago I had been crying so much, and now I was laughing and having fun… Deidara's really good at this comforting shit…

I had been so busy being sad and such that I hadn't realized just how close our faces were to each other… By now Deidara was pretty much holding me in his lap on the floor so I had to look up to see him. Our faces were only mere inches apart and I could then feel mine heating up and of course he just had to notice my blush and laughed at me. I pouted, "What's so funny??"

"The fact that you always blush around almost all of us, yeah."

That only made me blush more, "Well I'm not used to having a bunch of guys living in my house, let alone _you_ guys!" He laughed at my deeper blush and I just turned my face to the side and buried it in his shoulder to hide.

Which only made him laugh even more before I felt his hand on the side of my face, turning it back to look at him. Deidara was smiling now, "Don't hide it, un. You're cute when you blush."

I felt my face burst into flames, "W-Well then I must always be adorable, ne?"

"Very," he almost whispered as he stared into my hazel eyes with his blue ones; I stared right back into his. Before I even knew it, that one night began to repeat itself; his face was getting bigger and closer… I half expected Alex to come barging in, but she didn't, and his face just kept getting closer…closer…closer, until I felt my eyes slide shut right before feeling his lips ghost over mine ever so lightly, and yet, it was as if an electric shock had just gone through me, his hand, which was still on the side of my face, ever so slightly tried to pull my face towards his which I happily obliged to. Once again the static shock shot throughout my body when I deepened the kiss…

Huh…to think that my very first kiss would be with a fictional character, and Deidara no less! I knew that I could die happy right there and then, I could die with at least one absolutely perfect moment in my life—hey that's as perfect as I'm ever going to get.

Or at least it would have been absolutely perfect if my phone hadn't vibrated right then in my back pocket making me jump and break away from the kiss—I was not happy about that!

I made an angry face as I reached for my phone and heard Deidara chuckling in the background.

"What so now me being startled and blushing make you laugh??" I asked.

He shook his head, "No, you making that 'angry face' is just too funny, un."

I stuck my tongue out at him before flipping open my phone to see who the text was from.

Mason.

I narrowed my eyes at the phone before opening the message: _Hey xD_

I felt myself go rigid. How could he be so casual after fucking cheating on me like he did?! I let out an angry sigh before closing my phone and getting up to go sit on my bed, turning on the T.V and putting on GAC.

Deidara came and sat next to me, "You ok?"

I looked over at him before sighing again and smiling, "Yeah for right now I'm fine… I just need to listen to some music, for some reason listening to loud music calms me sometimes."

"Well as long as killing innocent walls isn't a part of it, hm." Deidara laughed before gently taking my hand and looking at my knuckles which were scratched up pretty good.

I grimaced, "Don't worry; I won't be killing any more walls, just jackasses."

"Why bring Hidan into this?" We both burst out laughing but I stopped mid-laugh. One of my favorite songs had just come on GAC, _White Liar_.

I immediately broke out into a huge grin before looking at Deidara, "Yeah music really helps." I proceeded to open my phone and send Mason a reply: _Hey. You know, I really love White Liar, don't you? It sends a nice message, ne? 'Cheat on me and have it come back and bite you in the ass'. I just love it!_

"A little too obvious, hm?"

"Well whether he knows I know today or tomorrow doesn't matter, as long as he knows I know by tomorrow after school I'll be good, but rest assured that when he finds out, it'll be from me and I'll be the one to dump his sorry ass." I grinned evilly.

"You sure you aren't some long lost Akatsuki member, yeah?"

"If I was then I'd have met you sooner," I smiled.

"Then I really wish you were."

"Yeah," I looked back at the T.V just as she was singing, _'Well here's a bombshell just for you, turns out I've been lying, too'._ "Now that's a lie that any girl would love to abide by."

I spent the rest of the evening and night in my room with Deidara, watching country music videos.

Another fangirl question about Deidara answered: What kind of music does he like?

Answer: He likes country. Well that settles it, he is never going back!!

* * *

Me: We all got a hillbilly bone down deep inside no matter where you from you just can't hide it, when the band starts banging and the fiddle saws, you can't help but hollerin' YEE-HAW! When you see them pretty lil' country queens man you gotta admit that it's in them jeans, ain't nothing wrong just gettin on your hillbilly bone-ba-bone bone!!

Hidan: WTF???!??!!?!?!

Deidara: She's way obsessed with country songs right now…

Hidan: Oh…

Me: How did you all like the fluff?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Alex: Not much of me in here…

Me: -.-

Deidara: I liked it XD

Me: You were in it dummy!!

Deidara: So? XD

Me: ^-^ Ok then

Hidan: Ugh just review or I'll sacrifice you!!

Me: Hidan I already told you! If you say that then some of them won't review!!

Hidan: …Weirdos…

Me: But if you do review then I'll give you a cookie!!! Now if you will excuse me I am very sleepy! I only got six hours of sleep last night! I didn't fall asleep till midnight and I was sneezy all day! *Falls asleep on Hidan*

Hidan: -.-*

Deidara: Review!! ;D

Me: Oh yeah and BTW!! I was watching GAC while typing this and when I started to write the cheating scene _White Liar _came on!!! I was all like XO!! Then Keith Urban's _Only You Can Love Me This Way_ came on!! And then _Then_ came on my playlist during the fluff!!!!!!!!!.........WHOOT!!!


	19. Chapter 19

Me: …I really need to stop updating so fast even though this one kind of took a long time… Sorry… writer's block… the next one will probably take some time as well :T.

Alex: NO!!!

Me: O.O

Deidara: Just get on with the damn story!

Me: Geez what's up with you?

Sasori: He just wants you to get to the fluffy parts with him in it…

Deidara: Do not! She's just so damn annoying with these things!

Me: T.T I see… TIME TO CASTRATE!!! Ohh~ Dei~da~ra~~!!!!

Deidara: O.O *Flees*

Me: GET BACK HERE!!!!

Alex: You know I don't think castrating him would be a very good idea….

Me: And why's that???

Alex: Do you really think that'd be beneficial for you?

Me: o////o I don't know what you're talking about!

Hidan: Riiiight…. -.-

Me: S-Shut up you two!!! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!

* * *

I don't know when I fell asleep last night, nor do I remember even falling asleep, but I do know that the last thing I heard was _Strange_ by Reba on GAC and I have to say that it was a perfect song for me right now…. It really is strange that I didn't spend the whole night crying my eyes out and such and instead spent it with Deidara and I know I was laughing through most of the night…

I could feel myself coming back into consciousness but when I opened my eyes it was still pitch black and when I glanced at the clock it told me I still had half an hour to sleep before I had to get up for school. So, I just buried my face back into my pillow and tried to keep it from moving.

Wait…

_Moving?!_ My eyes shot open then and I hesitantly poked my 'pillow' only to realize that this wasn't my usual pillow. It was too warm, too fleshy to be my pillow.

"Deidara," I heard Sasori say quietly, which made me jump.

Then, my pillow talked, "Yeah?"

"I think your little bed buddy it awake now."

My pillow chuckled, "Yeah she kind of just poked me, hm."

Ok so my pillow just chuckled and the only person in the room that chuckled was Deidara… Well good thing Alex isn't here. My face immediately began to burn.

"Huh…" my pillow said again.

"What?" Sasori asked.

"Now she's starting to burn me…un…"

"Must be one hell of a blush."

"I'll say…ouch!"

I immediately shot up then—my eyes had finally adjusted—and saw that, indeed, Deidara and I must have slept in the same bed last night… How this came to happen, I don't know. But what I do know is that my whole head and neck were on fire right then, "What the hell???"

"You kind of fell asleep on me last night, hm." Deidara said and I could see his smirk as he just sat next to me on my bed.

"And he didn't want to push you off apparently," Sasori laughed—wow I didn't know that he could laugh!

Deidara scoffed, "I would have, but then I'd have woken her up, un!"

"You just keep saying that, brat."

If it wasn't so dark then I'd have seen the blush on Deidara's cheeks, but sadly mine was so bad that I bet they could both see it… "S-So I slept…"

"You pretty much slept with Deidara, though I don't think you'd want to go around telling people quite like that." Sasori said from his spot on the floor.

I facepalmed before falling back on my bed and did my best to avoid Deidara… "Whatever just let me sleep until the alarm goes off!" Neither of them said anything until the alarm went off and when it did I found that I had clinged to Deidara again.

"Am I really that awesome of a pillow?" He asked.

I groaned as I sat up, "I just wanna go back to bed…"

"Yeah, we were up later than when you usually go to bed, hm."

"I don't want to know what happened," Sasori said as he got up, opened my door, and left my room.

"We didn't do anything that's in your dirty little puppet mind, puppet boy!" I yelled after him.

"I never said you did!" He yelled back.

"Oh just go and blow shit up with Achmed! Wait…you would be the one do blow stuff up," I turned to Deidara.

"Don't get my art confused with his pathetic excuse for art!" Deidara huffed. I just shook my head and closed my eyes, which was a bad idea because now I couldn't get them to open again. That's when I felt an arm around me… This morning is just full of surprises… The arm pulled me closer to Deidara and I kept my head down to hide the slight blush I was getting. At least I would have kept my head down had Deidara not flicked me in the head, "Oi, wake up, you have a jackass to kill remember, yeah?"

I looked up at him and scowled, "Hey Hidan's ass isn't mine until next week!"

We both were laughing when Sasori came back in with a poptart, "I don't think that Deidara would be too happy if that were the case."

I only laughed harder when I saw a hint of a blush on Deidara's face as he threw the actual pillow at Sasori.

Wait a second…there's still an arm around me! I looked down and saw the arm wrapped right around my waist with the hand resting on my hip. "That hand had better not bite me…" I mumbled to myself. Of course with his hearing Deidara heard me and his hand-mouth started to nibble at my shirt earning a screech from me as I jumped off the bed.

"Am I really that much of a freak, yeah?" Deidara smiled.

"No it just startled me! It's not every day that you're bitten by a Jashin-damn hand-mouth!" I said as I walked out of my room only to run right into Alex.

"What the hell is it with you three and screaming in the morning?!" She asked.

"It's not my fault!" I waved my hands wildly, "It's Deidara's! He bit me!!"

Alex just gave me an odd look before shaking her head and going into the bathroom. I just shrugged and went to get food. I made toast! With Sunny D! For some reason I won't drink the Florida Made stuff we have but I'll drink Sunny D…

I sat down at the table along with Tobi, Kisame, and Hidan. Please tell me you can see the awkward moment coming!

"Did Abby-chan have fun sleeping with Deidara-senpai last night?!" Tobi burst out.

I spit out the Sunny D that I was drinking while Kisame and Hidan just roared with laughter.

"Tobi!!" I yelled at him, "What the crap, dude?!"

Tobi just turned his head to the side, "What did Tobi do?"

"Nice one Tobi!" Kisame said.

"Fucking hilarious!" Hidan agreed.

"Shut up you two! Nothing happened dammit!" I yelled before eating my toast angrily.

"We never said that anything fucking happened," Hidan smirked.

"You were thinking it." I mumbled.

"Ahh, touché," Kisame said.

"IRUKA GET OUT OF MY EPISODE!!" Alex came over randomly and yelled. We all stared at her, "Sorry I guess only Abby would get that… Why does she look like she's gonna kill a kitten?"

"Because this house is full of perverts," I got up and took my dishes to the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher—yes I ate all the toast! I'm just that fast of an eater when I want to get away from perverts who are torturing me.

"Did you just notice?" Alex asked as she came over. I stayed quiet. "Ok then…well what happened last night? I mean after Deidara went into your room. It sounded like you were killing your room and then right after he went in…"

I smiled at the memory then began to blush, "Well he just comforted me… and…" I trailed off.

"And…what??" Alex started jumping in place in excitement.

"He…he kissed me…" I mumbled, but Alex heard it. Actually because of her, everyone heard it.

"ZOMFJ HE KISSED YOU?! ZOMFJWTFBBQ??!?!?! KYAAAAAAAAAA!!!" And with that Alex went around the house yelling 'Deidara kissed Abby ZOMFJ!!!!'

I was ready to go crawl under a rock… I just booked it to my room to get changed and what do you know? Deidara and Sasori were still in there…

"Ahh so that's what happened?" Sasori asked.

"Pretty much, un." Deidara sighed.

I twitched, "I need to get changed."

With that they both left. I trained them so well!! I took my time changing; I didn't want to face the rest of the Akatsuki just yet… Too embarrassing. After I finally got dressed we had five minutes before we had to leave so I decided to get my school stuff together and then it was time to leave.

As I walked to the car I took a deep breath; I'd have to do a lot of yelling soon. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Deidara—who else did you expect?

"Try not to kill him, ok?" He asked.

I scowled, "Why shouldn't I? I have a right to, you know."

Deidara smiled, "Yeah, you do, but ever since I first saw him I always thought he'd make a good piece of art…hm…"

I broke out into a grin, "You're going to blow him up for me?"

"If I'm allowed to."

I laughed, "Usually I'd say 'sure go ahead' but you'd take it seriously and actually do it."

"So you don't want him to die?"

I looked ahead at the car again, "We'll see how I feel after I yell at him."

Deidara sighed, "Ok, but I'm telling you right now that if you come home again like that because of him, he will become one of the biggest pieces of art I have ever created."

I smiled despite myself, "Thanks, oh and I guess that if they ask, you can tell the Akatsuki what happened." With that I walked off to the car. The car ride was actually pretty quiet. Alex knew I had to prepare myself for this. I didn't want to break down crying during my rant, now did I?

Before I knew it we were there and about to enter the cafeteria.

"You ready?" Alex asked.

I took a few deep breaths, "Yes."

We pushed open the doors and I walked straight to our table, my eyes locked on the jackass. He turned and saw me, he waved, I didn't, he said 'hey', I said nothing. I finally made it to the table…

"Hey, you ok?" Mason asked as he stood up.

I smiled sweetly, "Of course I am, _babe_." I said the main part of the sentence sweetly but on 'babe' my tone went straight from sweet to sour.

He raised an eyebrow, "You sure—?"

I cut him off as I raised my knee and it connected with the little amount of balls that he had—hey if he had any at all he would have told me to my face that he didn't trust me—before he doubled over in pain, "Actually you know I wasn't feeling so good, but now I feel so much better!!"

"Abby…what…the…fuck??"

I narrowed my eyes at him as he looked up at me from the ground, "Mason, I know that you've been lying. So, don't worry about the fact that I'm dumping your sorry ass, because you still have that slut Ashley!"

His eyes widened as his head dropped and he sighed, "When did you find out?"

I reached down and grabbed the collar of his shirt to bring him up to eye-level with me, "Yesterday when you told her that I was fucking 'cheating' on you, when in reality I hadn't even so much as kissed Deidara until after I found out!" My knee came up again to knee him in the gut—that taijutsu training really came in handy, ne? I knew that by now I had an audience, but I didn't really care.

Mason coughed but continued to speak, "When the hell…did you get…so…strong…?"

I smirked, "Taijutsu, duh." I let go and let him fall to my feet before I turned to walk away.

I didn't get far before I heard him speak, "He's still going to die one day. He has to go back one day and you know it. He'll go back and fucking blow himself up for no reason."

I froze in place before slowly turning back around to see him standing there, smirking. I narrowed my eyes and walked back over to him, "Excuse me?"

His smirk widened, "He's gonna fucking leave you and end up dead in the end and you know it."

_Bam!_

The flesh of my hand made contact with his face as I looked down at the ground. I used all my strength in that slap so I know that he stumbled to the side a bit.

"Say that again bastard," I looked back up at him, "And you just see what happens!" I whipped around to walk away when I saw Chris, "Did you know about him and that slut??"

Chris seemed just as surprised as everyone but shook his head, "No, I honestly didn't…"

I just nodded, "Ok," I continued to walk out of the cafeteria and right by the table Ashley was sitting at. I looked over at her and she stared back like she wasn't scared the least bit. I knew that wasn't true, "Don't even let me see your Jashin-damn face again, slut. I would call you a whore but you aren't smart enough to get paid for what you do every day!" Her eyes widened and her mouth formed an 'o' as I walked away, smiling. I felt a hell of a lot better despite Mason's last comment.

The rest of the day everyone besides Alex and Chris stayed at least a foot away from me and at lunch I shot Mason a glare as he was walking toward the table and he just walked away. By the end of the day I had glared so much that my eyes started to hurt! Good thing Alex was driving….

We finally got home and I just collapsed on the couch—I layed on my stomach horizontally.

"Hard day?" Konan asked.

"My eyes feel like they're about to fall out I've glared so much!!" I said into the couch.

I was then glomped, "ABBY-CHAN!! TOBI'S SO SORRY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED!!!!!"

Tobi was now on top of me on the couch, "T-T-Tobi! Can't b-b-breathe!!"

"TOBI'S SORRY!!!" He quickly got up and I breathed in as much air as I could.

Then I sighed, "Dammit, where's my pillow?!" I looked around and noticed that some of the Akatsuki weren't even in the living room.

"In your room?" Pein asked.

I shook my head, "No, my human pillow."

Just then the rest of them walked in from the Florida room. I grinned and ran over to Deidara while Alex ran over to Itachi.

"There's my pillow!" I said as I ran over and glomped him and Alex and I both stumbled, though mine was a bit more graceful than Alex's… She glomped Itachi so hard that they both fell over… Alex was now straddling Itachi and smiling like the mad woman that she is. Itachi had a hint of a blush across his cheeks but was smiling nonetheless. Wait… "WHAT THE CRAP ITACHI'S SMILING?!"

Everyone looked over at me with odd expressions.

"What?" I asked, "He was smiling! Uchiha's never smile!!!" I waved my arms around frantically as Itachi and Alex got up and my arms were put under control by two hands.

"Ok Abby's gone insane, hm." Deidara said and then patted me on the head.

"No I'm not!" I didn't even bother with the fact that Deidara was pretty much hugging me from behind in front of everyone… Itachi fucking smiled and no one believed me!!

"No," Itachi said, "She's right," He broke out into another small smile.

Alex and I both let out squeals of joy before Alex ran back over and glomped him again and he…hugged her back?!

"ITACHI'S DYING! HE'S ACTING WAY OOC!! DID HE DRINK AGAIN!!!??" I looked over at Hidan.

Hidan shook his head, "Not that I fucking know of!!!"

I sighed heavily before getting my backpack and Deidara and going over to the table to do my homework.

"Why do I have to come, too?" Deidara asked.

"Because I don't want to sit there alone and Alex is going to be with Itachi for the rest of the damn night now." I sat down and pulled out my school stuff.

Deidara shrugged, "Works for me."

I laughed as I started my math homework while Deidara watched before collapsing on the table, "How the hell do you know what the hell you're doing, hm???"

Laughing again I told him, "Because school is a bitch."

After a few hours of work I realized that I couldn't hear Alex…

"Itachi?" I asked and he poofed in from nowhere—no really, he poofed in with that transportation jutsu!!

"Yes?" He asked.

"Where's Alex?"

Itachi's eye twitched, "I thought you knew."

"Shit…" I got up immediately and looked around the house for her. I was unsuccessful… "Oi! Itachi! Use your locating chakra stuff to find her!!"

He sighed, "Fine…" a minute later, "Fuck…"

"…What…?" I asked.

"……She's on the roof…"

I fell over anime style before running outside to see Alex right where Itachi said she was. She was sitting on the edge of the roof swinging her legs back and forth, "ALEX WHAT THE HELL?! YOU KNOW YOU SHOULDN'T BE UP THERE WITH YOUR CLUMSINESS!!!"

She looked down at me and Itachi who had just joined me outside, "Oh hey guys! Yeah I got bored so Tobi helped me get on the roof!"

"TOBI'S A GOOD BOY!!!" Tobi came from somewhere on the roof to wave at us.

"Madara…" I said under my breath. I know that Tobi didn't hear me, but I think Itachi did…

"Alex," Itachi said—if he really did hear me, he didn't show it.

"Yes?"

"Get off the roof."

"Awww, why??"

"Because I don't want to clean your blood off the grass, that's why."

"Awww is Itachi worried about lil'ol me??"

He twitched, "Just get down…."

"Ok!" With that she jumped…

"FUCK ALEX!!!" I said but it was too late… She had fallen to her death…

We shall miss you Alex!

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Ok so she just landed on the driveway and didn't die… But just think how quiet it would be!! …Yeah I'd be bored too without her here…

Itachi and I ran over to her and saw that she was holding her leg, "Fuck I landed on my leg! GAH!!!!"

"Alex why the hell did you jump?!" I yelled at her.

"Now is not the time to be yelling at her," Itachi said.

I pouted, "Well then hurry up and fix her leg!"

"I'm not a medical ninja…"

"Well someone in the Akatsuki has to be! I can't take her to the hospital! We'll never be able to afford that…"

"You sound just like Kakuzu… but we do have Konan… she's slightly knowledgeable."

"Then let's get her out here!" I ran inside before he could say anything else. Hey, giving them some time to bond more can't hurt, can it? No, no it can't. "Konan!" I yelled as I got inside. She poked her head around the corner, "Alex's hurt!"

She dashed over to me, "What is it?"

"She jumped off the roof," Konan gave me an odd stare, "I'll tell you later, but she jumped off and now her leg… I don't know what's wrong…"

"I'll handle it," She ran past me and outside. I tried to follow but felt a hand on my shoulder and looked back to se Pein. I know I was surprised too.

"Let her handle it," he said, "She's a very skilled medic."

I could only nod. After a while Konan, Itachi, and Tobi—he was still out there helping—brought Alex in and set her on the couch.

"What took so long?!" I asked.

"I didn't want to move her before I healed her leg enough to the point that she could move. She did some pretty good damage to it." Konan replied, "Do you have anything I could use to put her leg in?"

I thought for a moment before running to the closet and pulled out some crutches and a leg-brace-thing and brought it back into the room. Everyone looked at me oddly, "What?" I asked. "My mom broke her leg once! We kept the stuff because we felt like it." I handed the stuff to Konan who put the brace on her and helped her up onto the crutches, "Well Alex" I giggled, "I don't think that those crutches should be anything new to you."

"Oh shut up," She glared/smiled.

I could only laugh before realizing something, "I'm not helping you shower! If you want any help you're going to have to ask one of them!" I pointed at the Akatsuki.

Alex made a face, "Well looks like I won't be showering any time soon."

I narrowed my eyes, "If you want any help you'll have to ask Itachi."

Alex's face brightened up dramatically, "I'll be showering very soon."

Itachi had a hint of a blush on his cheeks, but was still smirking.

"Why the fuck does Itachi and Deidara get all the fucking action?!" Hidan bellowed.

I shook my head, "Because they aren't perverts. If you were to help Alex taking a shower, you'd probably rape her."

"I would not!" He yelled.

We all started laughing—well the stoic people chuckled but you get the point.

Later that night when Alex needed to take a shower, I couldn't help but laugh at how cool Itachi and Alex were being about it. When they finally came out Alex still looked virgin so I let her off the hook, but not before taking Itachi aside, "Hey, you only helped her shower, right??"

He chuckled at my curiosity, "Yes that is all that we did, ok?"

I narrowed my eyes, "Fine, for now, but I've got my eyes on you!"

Itachi only laughed as he walked away to who knows where and Deidara came over to stand next to me, "A little over protective, un?"

"I just don't want them getting it on in my own shower!" I said and crossed my arms.

"I guess that wouldn't be a very good thing for you?"

"I'd never be able to take a shower in there again."

He laughed, "No, I guess you wouldn't."

* * *

Me: SUCKISH CHAPTER, I KNOW!!!! -.- Do not say anything bad about it or I will kill you.

Sasori: Someone's pissy.

Me: I JUST HAD THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE, LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!

Deidara: Geez what happened??

Me: T.T I got a detention because I was chewing gum… I'VE NEVER HAD ANY PUNISHEMENT AT SCHOOL OF ANY TYPE!!! Oh and……I'm single now because I just broke up with my boyfriend today T.T

Hidan: That's it?

Me: I HAD A BAD DAY!!!! T.T… But I would like to thank Dallas for helping me to coughreviewcough dump him! Unlike Alex who RAN AWAY WHEN HE CAME!!!

Alex: Well he looked so happy and…

Me: I know! I wanted to run away too you know!!!

Alex: You could have!

Me: Then Dallas would have made chicken noises at me!!!

Alex: Yeah…

Me: She made them at you -.-… Omfj! Though, it was so funny at the end of lunch because me, Alex, and Dallas all went to library to coughreviewcough talk about what I was going to do, and coughreviewcough it was like a pre-break-up party!! It was fun ^-^

Alex: Yeah it was XD

Me: Yeah and then Dallas was all like "I don't think it is in Abby's best interest to coughreviewcough date you anymore" in her therapist voice when she helped me dump him—he's my first boyfriend, I didn't know what to say!—and then he was just all "Well that's coughreviewcough depressing…" Yeah…

Deidara: Why are you telling people this…?

Me: Because I put subliminal messages in it!!! …REVIEW!!!!! XD I'll give you… Kisame!!!

Kisame: O.o'


	20. Chapter 20

Me: I'm listening to the second Death Note opening!!!!

L: Wow...

Deidara: *Throws him out* NO ONE FROM OTHER ANIMES, UN!!!!

Me: T.T Meanie

Hidan: Just start it already!!

Me: I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING QUICKER!!

Hidan: DAMMIT!!

Me: I had HORRIBLE writer's block for the first part of this chapter!!! But this is probably the longest chapter yet!! Well if not the longest, then pretty damn close!!! So be happy dammit!!! …Yeah…

Alex: There are ideas from Ffion Eirlys here! As well as me!! xD

Me: Yes! And if I missed anyone for that, then I'm sorry!! Heh… ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!

* * *

That night I went to bed a bit early and the next day Alex and I were hit with a big problem: How in the hell are we getting to school when Alex has a broken leg?

The answer: Ninjas.

"Are you two ready?" Itachi asked and Alex and I nodded, "Good." He picked up Alex and put her on his back while carrying her crutches—she had her backpack on her back—as he walked out of the garage and jumped away.

Then _I_ was picked up without warning and slung onto Deidara's back, he ran out of the garage and jumped into the air. I let out a 'meep' and heard Deidara laugh at my surprise, "If you don't want to fall off you better hold on tight, yeah."

"That was your master plan all along wasn't it??" I said in his ear.

"How did you figure it out?"

I felt myself slipping and tightened my grip on my legs and arms, "I'm just that smart."

"Don't squeeze the life out of me, yeah!" He said referring to my iron-grip.

"Well don't run so fast!"

Deidara then started to run faster…

"…You're enjoying this aren't you?" I clung even more to him then.

"No I'm not enjoying having you cling to me at all," Sarcasm was very much present in his voice.

"Well… I have no comeback… I blame the wind that's washing my brains out!!!" I yelled at him and felt myself slip slightly, "Gah!!"

Deidara tightened his hold on my legs, "Don't worry; I'm not going to let you fall, hm."

"R-Right…" I would have said something more, but I was a little distracted by the fact that Deidara had his arms wrapped around my legs!! Then something dawned on me, "Bite me again, and I will kill you in your sleep."

"But then you'd be sad," he chuckled.

"No, I'd be not-bitten!"

"Is that even a word, un?"

"In my dictionary it is!"

We finally reached Itachi and Alex and landed a few blocks from the school—we don't want people seeing flying ninjas now do we? The rest of the day was spent pretty much like any other day. People weren't too surprised to see Alex on crutches actually…

The day went pretty well until I had to pee in my last period again and when I was heading back to class I bumped right into…guess who! ORLANDO BLOOM!!! No wait Deidara's not at my school right now…. **(A/N: Remember in the one chapter when they were all watching Pirates of the Caribbean? And when Abby fell asleep on Deidara—or something like that—and said it was Orlando Bloom? Well that's where this is from people!!!)**

Yes I bumped in the jackass, "What are you doing out of class? Banging that slut, hm?" Oh great now I sound like Deidara….

He let out a non-humorous laugh, "I don't have to explain myself to you."

"Of course not," I laughed, "But you might wanna do some explaining to Deidara. He's been looking for a new canvas and thinks that you'd be perfect."

"If he killed me then the police would know that you had a part in it," he smirked.

"Moi?" I put my hand on my chest in a dramatic way, "But I don't even own any explosives," Now I smirked, "Besides they wouldn't find any explosives, only you splattered everywhere. Ohh wouldn't that be so pretty??"

"Chris would know what happened."

"Oh yeah, totally, 'Police! My friend was just blown up! There isn't any evidence of explosives there but he was blown up with clay that had chakra in it!!' Yeah I'd buy that," I mimicked Chris's voice.

Mason only shook his head and continued walking; when he walked by I saw that my hand had left a pretty good bruise on his cheek, "You might want to treat that and watch your back. One more wrong move and Deidara will have your head. Itachi, too. He wouldn't want any friend of Alex's to be sad."

He turned back to me, "Then I guess I won't talk to you until after they leave. Since once they do, they'll be as good as dead."

I stepped forward and he stepped back, "Shut it. Now. Or do you want me to even out your face??"

"Tch," He walked away.

When we finally got back home I collapsed on the couch, "It needs to be Friday."

Alex collapsed right next to me, "I second that."

Of course the universe doesn't like me at all…. Hidan came walking in with a little black book, "What the fuck is this shit?!" He held up the book, "There's nothing about Jashin-sama in here!"

I twitched when I caught the title of the book, _Holy Bible_.

Well, fuck…

"Hidan it's the religious book for Christians, leave it alone," I groaned.

"I thought you've never read a Bible," Alex questioned.

"I haven't, but my uncle is very religious and gave my family that one year for Christmas. We didn't want to throw it out or sell it, so we kept it," I shrugged and got up, "Now hand over the book Hidan." I reached my hand out to take it back.

"Hell no! What the fuck do you want it back for if you won't even use it?! I should burn this infernal thing!" Hidan yelled and waved the book around.

"Wow you actually know words like 'infernal'. Good job, now give me the book," I walked towards him.

He narrowed his eyes at me, "Make me."

I narrowed my eyes right back and went into the kitchen and came back with the big knife, "Let's go, then. This'll be some good training." I smirked and ran at Hidan.

He smirked, too, and sidestepped me and just barely missed my knife cutting through his arm. I turned toward him jumped at him again, knife armed and ready. Right as I was about to puncture the skin of his chest, however, he grabbed my hand with his free hand.

"You really think you can win in a match of muscle against me??" He asked and proceeded to flip me over.

I landed on my back with an 'oof' but held fast to his hand and reached into my pocket, "No, but in a game of brain, I so win," I pulled out a small knife and stabbed his arm. He let go with a muffled curse which gave me time to sloppily stab his other arm and grab back the book and ran back towards the master bedroom where we kept it, "Ha! Looks like I win!" I said as I walked away but was soon cut off when a huge weight crashed on top of me, "Oof!"

"Sometimes muscle trumps brain," Hidan said and stole back the book; I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Yeah you win, now can you get off?!" I yelled and tried to get out from under the _huge_ Jashinist.

"Nah, I kinda like this position," he said right by my ear.

"Hidan, get off her, un," Deidara came up in front of us; he had an indifferent look on his face.

"What if I don't? Are you going to blow me up?"

"Yes, yes I will," Deidara smirked.

"I'd pay to see that!" I commented randomly and they both gave me odd looks, "What? An immortal being blown up? That's fucking awesome!!!"

"Well if Hidan doesn't get up soon you'll be able to see it for free, yeah," Deidara grinned.

I felt the weight leave my body and breathed in a gust of air, "Thank Jashin! I thought I was going to suffocate!" I got up and turned to Hidan who had blood all over his arms, "Go wash that off before you stain something," I looked at myself to see if I got any on me. I didn't. Whew!

"If I don't?" Hidan smirked.

"Then I'll have to wash it off with _cold_ water," It was my turn to smirk.

"No way in hell! There is no way—"

I snatched the Bible from him, "Ha! I am ninja!!"

Hidan sweatdropped, "Yeah I'm just going to go wash the shit off now…"

I raised an eyebrow but shrugged it off and put the Bible back in its rightful place before going back out into the living room.

Alex was sitting on the couch with Itachi talking about whatever, Kisame, Kakuzu, Zetsu, and Sasori were focused on something on the T.V—I think it was the news—Hidan was in the kitchen making sure not to stain my house with blood, Tobi was…nowhere to be seen. Same as Pein and Konan… That's not good at all… I started looking all around the living room and glancing out into the Florida Room and kitchen but couldn't see them.

That's when I felt a hand on my shoulder, "What are you looking for, hm?"

I turned around to see Deidara with a curious expression, "Oh! Nothing, I just don't see Tobi, Pein, or Konan so I was just looking to see where they were, that's all, heh, heh."

He raised an eyebrow, "Well ok then." He pulled me along to the living room and plopped me down between him and Alex. When I looked back at the T.V I saw they were indeed watching the news….

"Well you all have no taste," I mumbled. They were talking about the earthquake in Haiti… I have to admit that I was worried about all the people there, but I just hate how they have to make such a big deal out of it all. I mean, yeah it does give them money, but does every single T.V channel have to have some sort of charity for it as well as every school, every work place, and just plain old everywhere? I don't think we should even have to use money for any of the Haiti Relief stuff…it should all be fucking free!

"Why the hell are they spending so much money on that place?!" Kakuzu said out of nowhere.

_What the hell?! Can he read my mind or something??_ "Because over 200,000 people died and they're trying to help," I said matter-of-factly.

"Are they part of your village?"

"No, they're a totally different country."

"Then why help them?!"

I shrugged, "Because we're nice, I guess."

"That's bullshit," Hidan said as he came back in.

"This country is bullshit," Alex said.

"Well at least Bush isn't in office anymore," I laughed, "That guy was the death of this damn nation!!"

"Who was Bush?" Itachi asked.

"He was our last president. He sent our troops off to war in… where are we fighting Alex?"

"Iraq? Or Iran…" Alex pondered.

I shrugged, "Somewhere in west Asia, I think. Anyways, there was a terrorist bombing back in 2001 that killed A LOT of people and Bush sent us off to war with the country that the terrorists lived in back in 2001…it's 2010 now… Damn, nine years…"

"I didn't realize it'd been so long," Alex said in wonder.

"So you went to war with this country because they killed many people in your country?" Kisame asked.

"Yup…we spend billions of dollars a year on weapons for it when we could be using that money to help our own country, at least one year it was billions… I'm not sure." I said.

"This world is so fucked up," Kakuzu mumbled.

"Here, here!" Alex and I said at the same time.

"If you think that's fucked up, you should hear about the Holocaust," Alex shivered.

"No I do not want to explain all of that!" I yelled.

The rest of the night went by pretty calmly and the next day went by pretty well, too.

I was so happy when Saturday came! Thank Jashin that it's finally the weekend!! After all that happened this week, you can guess that I welcomed the weekend with a smile and open arms. Especially when I woke up I saw that it was already ten—I had been so tired and had wanted to sleep in so much and to me, ten in the morning is perfect sleeping-in-time!

"Well I sure did sleep in…" I murmured to myself. I was hoping that no one would wake me up, and they didn't! Hooray!

"I'll say, hm." I jumped at the sudden voice and looked over the side of the bed to see Deidara laying there smirking.

"Do you all just love to scare the bejeezus out of me?!" I asked him.

"You make it way too easy," another voice said from behind me. I turned around to see Sasori standing on the other side of the bed opposite Deidara.

I growled, "Well as long as you all don't try to rape me like I know Hidan would, I'm good."

"How do you know Hidan would?" Deidara got up and sat on my bed next to me.

"Deidara I think that more appropriate question here," Sasori sat on the other side of me, successfully trapping me between them, "How does she know _we_ **won't**?"

I could feel the blush creeping up, but I did a very good job to suppress it…well I was until Deidara put his hand on my leg, "Only one way to find out."

"Meep!" Somehow I made a very random sound and jumped off the foot of the bed landing on my butt, "Screw you two!" I heard laughing from my bed and I got up to see Deidara and Sasori dying of laughter in my bed—yes puppets can die of laughter too! I immediately grabbed my camera off the dresser and snapped a picture, "Now this will be some good SasoDei yaoi!" It was now my turn to be in the middle of a laughing fit and right in the middle of it I was tackled to the ground, "Argh!" I grunted, "You two may look skinny, but combined you weigh a ton." Yes now Deidara _and_ Sasori were on top of me… The blush returned just as my door was flung open.

"What the fuck is going in he—" Hidan stopped talking when he saw our positions—Sasori and Deidara trying to get the camera back from me while I tried to keep it away from them. In a nut shell, if you didn't know what was happening at first glance, you'd definitely be inferring wrong… Much like Hidan was probably doing now, "Do you guys think you could keep the damn noise down when you're doing it??"

My face tingled with the blush as I looked at the two males on top of me who were smirking. I dropped the camera and wriggled out of their grip before going over and hitting Hidan.

"What the crap?!" Hidan rubbed his arm.

"Don't infer things you perverted Jashinist!" I yelled at him then left to go get a poptart… Alas I hadn't made it halfway there before I was glomped by a lollipop…of EVIL!!!

"Abby-chan~! What was Abby-chan and Deidra-senpai doing in her room?!" Tobi asked.

"Well he was trying to kill me and I was trying to survive!" I tried to loosen Tobi's iron-grip but failed.

"Why was senpai trying to kill you?!"

"Probably because she wasn't good enough in be—" Adrenaline ran through my body and I was able to get away from Tobi and hit Hidan with my dictionary that I grabbed off the coffee table.

"Say one more word on the subject and I'll rip off your head off and make you listen to read-aloud-limes!" I threatened.

Hidan walked away grumbling something about 'damn big books'. I sighed and continued to the kitchen for my poptart, but was attacked…again…well sort of.

"Abby," Alex walked in front of me and tapped her good foot, "What happened?"

"I tried to take a picture of SasoDei yaoi but when they saw I had taken the picture, they tackled me. That's it." I tried walking to the kitchen again.

"You left out the part where Deidara tried to find the answer to my question," I heard Sasori say from my room and when I turned to look, he was coming out into the living room.

"What question?" Alex asked.

I tried to stop Sasori from speaking but I found that I couldn't move. _Damn puppet strings!!_ "Damn you Sasori!!"

Sasori smirked, "Oh nothing. I just asked how does she know Deidara and I won't rape her like she says Hidan would do."

"I tried to experiment, but she ran away, un." Deidara said from behind me—which scared the living hell out of me!

"Damn you both!" I yelled as Alex and everyone else started to laugh their asses off. I was finally released and made my way to **finally** get my well deserved poptart! I grabbed it out of the pantry and ate angrily…

"What's wrong with Abby-chan?" Tobi came up beside me and sat down.

I narrowed my eyes at him, "Just that everyone's out to torture me, that's all."

"Tobi doesn't think that's very nice!"

"Tobi, why do you always talk in third person?" I always thought it was because he was really Madara, and since Madara couldn't care less about anything Tobi likes, he used third person instead of say 'I'.

"Tobi doesn't talk in third person," Tobi tilted his head to the side.

"Yeah, _Madara_ does…" I mumbled to myself.

"What? Tobi didn't hear," There was a slight edge in his voice.

"Nothing. If you will excuse me, I need to kill a few people." I got up and left my poptart plate on the table—I'd get to it at some point!—and went into the living room. "Ok, since today is obviously going to be a pretty boring day, I have decided that we are going to go to the mall today!"

Alex got a big grin on her face while the rest of the Akatsuki looked at me confused.

"It's a place with many shops and teenagers like Alex and I," They all went white when I said 'Alex', "Ok so maybe like me. If anyone was like Alex we'd all be dead in a matter of five minutes."

Alex nodded, "So true, but not everyone would be able to go, Abby. I mean Zetsu would stick out like a sore thumb and some of the others would, too!"

"Don't worry," Pein stepped forward, "Konan and I will not be going."

"We'd prefer to stay here, if that's ok with you," Konan said.

I nodded, "Of course. Is it ok with you, Zetsu, if you don't go?"

"Of course. **Who'd want to go to some place like that anyways?**" Zetsu replied.

I nodded, "Kakuzu…?"

"No way in hell," Kakuzu deadpanned.

"Well ok then…" I looked over at Tobi, "You won't be able to go with that mask on, buddy."

"But Tobi likes his mask!!" Tobi complained.

"Yes that's all right and good, but you can't walk around a mall with a lollipop for a head."

"So he can't go?" Kisame asked and I nodded.

"Those who could go are Deidara, Itachi, Hidan, Sasori, and Kisame if he wore pants and a hoodie. Pein and Konan would fit in fine, but they don't want to go… Zetsu and Tobi would stick out anywhere besides an anime convention." I explained.

"Well then when are we going? I'm so fucking bored here!" Hidan ranted.

"Calm yourself. Once you all are ready we can go, ok?" I said. One minute I had the whole Akatsuki in front of me and the next I only had about half… "Well they're excited."

"They're tired of being in this house all the time," Pein said.

"I know how they feel. Once when I was sick I had to stay in this house FOREVER! It got very boring very quickly," I sighed and then fell over from a random glomp that I received.

"Abby-chan, why can't Tobi go?!!" Tobi asked while sitting on me.

"Because you look like a lollipop! Now get off!!" I tried to get up, but failed.

"What's with these guys and falling on you, Abby?" Alex snickered.

"I don't think that Deidara fell on her, I think she fell on him that one time," Konan put in.

"Ok I get it! The Akatsuki and I fall on each other! Now get off Tobi!!" I tried getting up again.

"Tobi," Pein said calmly, "Get off of her."

"Yes Pein-sama," Tobi said, but there was a certain tone he used when saying Pein's name… Madara must not like being told what to do by Pein…

I shook it off as the guys came back in, fully dressed.

_Damn they're fast!_

**Well they are ninjas.**

_True… Wow they look good…_

It was true. They all looked very nice in their plain old jeans and t-shirts—Kisame was in a blue hoodie, however. I giggled when I saw that Hidan was in a Metallica shirt and Itachi was in a Linkin Park shirt.

"Well it'd be funnier if Sasuke was wearing that shirt…" I mumbled to myself. Heh… Naruto Abridged-type reference…

"So how are we getting there?" Sasori asked.

"Itachi'll drive us!" Alex stated like it was one of the most obvious things ever. I fell over anime style

"What the crap makes you think he'll be able to drive us?! Is that really the smartest thing to do?!" I yelled at her, "I mean come on Alex! I know you're not that far in the series but still!!!" Did she really expect someone who was going blind to drive?!

Itachi must have known what I was getting at, "Don't worry, if Alex is able to do it, then I'm sure it won't be too hard to do. I observed her when we went to the beach as well. It does not seem too hard to do."

"Fine! Let someone who doesn't even know the rules of the road drive!! But if I die I am so haunting you both!" I pointed at Alex and Itachi. "I will become your inner Alex!!!"

**What'll happen to me?!!?!**

_Huh… I don't know!_

**WHAT THE HELL?!**

"Don't worry, Deidara wouldn't let you die," Alex smirked.

"And Itachi wouldn't let you," I said right back.

"I already know that!" Alex glared.

"Why can't you be like a normal person and blush whenever people say things like that??"

"You mean like you?"

"…Let's just get in the damn van," I walked away towards the garage followed by Alex and the members that were coming with us.

Alex and Itachi sat up in the front—she had to tell him how to drive the whole way there—and I sat in the middle row between Deidara and Hidan while Sasori and Kisame sat in the back. It was quite the awkward ride, I must say. Whenever we turned, I'd lean over and crash into one of them. When I crashed into Deidara, Alex or Kisame would make some remark and when I crashed into Hidan…well he just went into pervert mode and then Deidara would say something and Alex and Kisame would again make a comment… It wasn't fun at all.

Once we finally got there we started to roam around the little mall—hey when you live in a little town, you get little malls! The first place we hit was Spencer's. Alex and I liked a lot of the things in there that weren't adult oriented. They had nice notebooks, belts, hats, and etcetera, although Hidan and Kisame were perfectly comfortable with the adult oriented things… Alex and I caught them staring at one poster of some chick and proceeded to drag them out—with the help of Sasori's strings.

To teach those two a lesson—and because it's what Alex and I wanted to actually do when we went to the mall—we dragged them into a random store—making sure it wasn't something like Hollister—and made them help us pick out clothes and such. I must say that it was rather hilarious to watch the two die of boredom while the others were perfectly happy with watching them squirm.

Once Alex and I found enough things to try on we hit the dressing rooms—the boys sat outside patiently…well some were patient…

"How many clothes have they tried on now?" I heard Kisame banging his head against a wall outside of the dressing rooms. He was just that loud…

"I don't know! I'm not in there with them, though that would make this a lot less boring…" I heard Hidan comment before I heard a thud, "Ow! What the hell Itachi?!" Itachi didn't answer… "Ugh this cannot get anymore fucking boring! Oi, would you two hurry the hell up?!"

"Hidan there are kids here, so stop the damn cursing!" I yelled pulling on a tank top and laughing at my hypocrisy.

"You know that's not possible for him, Abby, and stop being such a hypocrite," Alex called from the other room—yes she does have a broken leg, but that doesn't mean she can't try on shirts, you know.

"I know but he could at least keep it down to minor things like I did! Kids don't need to hear f-bombs and we don't need to be thrown out just because of a few S-Class criminals," I walked out of the dressing room and sighed, "Geez we're definitely going to be thrown out because of you all… Anyways, how does this look?"

Deidara smiled, "Nice, hm." Itachi and Sasori nodded in agreement.

"Hot," Hidan smirked earning him another whack, but from Deidara this time. "What the hell?!" Hidan rubbed his head.

"He's just jealous," Sasori said calmly.

I felt slight heat on my face and could see some pink on Deidara's cheeks but Alex came out of her dressing room before they could say anything more, "How does this look?" She was wearing a white form fitting t-shirt with 'I like chocolate' in purple letters on the front and a little cartoon candy bar person on it.

"Nice," I said, "But you really should get the periodic table one." She had another shirt with the periodic table on it, but instead of elements it had text abbreviations like 'Ttyl, Brb, Lol', and etc.

"Abby I am not wearing that one, ever! People are going to want to read it!" Alex shivered. Did I mention that the table was right across her chest? Yeah… I wouldn't want to wear it either…

"As long as you don't eat any chocolate I think we'll survive," Kisame teased.

"If she eats any chocolate she'll ruin her shirt and mine," I sighed and they all gave me a look, "Hey don't ask me! Somehow she'd be eating her chocolate and not only drop it on her, but get some on me as well!"

"It's true," Alex said.

"Ok we get it! The shirt is fine! Can we please get the fuck out of here now???" Hidan complained.

"Stop cursing and we will!" I yelled at him.

"Get me the fucking hell out of this damn place and I'll shut my Jashin-damn mouth!"

A little kid and his mom walked by then and the kid was laughing at Hidan while the mother just stood there with her mouth agape in amazement. I didn't blame her, most people aren't stupid enough to go on a cursing rampage in a public place, but then again Hidan isn't all that smart…

"Hidan!" I hit him with my dictionary, "I told you to shut up!! Don't go cursing in front of that little kid! I am so sorry ma'am! He just moved here from New York and used to be in a gang, heh, heh. We're trying to turn him around, but it hasn't been going well."

The woman's eyes just went wide before she grabbed her son and ran away.

"Where the fuck do you keep getting that damn boo—" Hidan was cut off as I hit him with the big book again, "Ow!"

"Don't curse."

"Well, Deidara, at least you know Hidan won't kill her," Kisame smirked but backed away from me.

I just rolled my eyes and Alex and I went back to trying on clothes. In the end we only bought about three shirts each… Oh well.

We were walking towards the food court when I bumped into Sasori, "Oi, why'd you stop walking??"

Sasori, as well as the other boys, were looking to their right with this look in their eye. I followed their gaze and nearly had a heart attack when I saw what store they were looking at. It was, in my opinion, one of the sleaziest and scariest stores I had ever seen in my life. Whenever I thought about it, it gave me chills. I've never been in the store because it scared me so much.

I was looking into _Victoria's Secret_.

"You've got to be kidding me," I mumbled.

"Hey, Abby, why don't we go in there?" Alex asked.

"Why would you want to go in there Alex??" I asked her.

She shrugged, "I don't know, but let's go!"

"Hell yes!" Hidan had a big grin on his face and looked at Alex and I with one of the most perverted looks I had ever seen.

"This'll be fun," Kisame said.

"Well at the very least it'll be fun to see Alexis and Abby kill you all for being perverts," Sasori said, "And then Itachi and Deidara torturing you for being perverts to them."

"Hn," was all Itachi said.

"Well let's go, un," Deidara said as they all started walking in.

I twitched, "I'll be fine right here."

They all turned back to look at me when Alex spoke, "Oh no, I am not going into this place alone with them!" She ran the best she could over to me and grabbed my arm and tried to pull me in.

"Alex you won't be able to drag me in when you're in that condition," I chuckled.

"No, but I can with help!" She said and I paled, "Deidara help me here!"

I looked over at Deidara who smirked and came over to help her drag me in, "Come on, un. It'll be fun."

"No! I don't wanna! No! You can't make me!! Help me, someone!!!" I yelled and I knew that anyone looking on must think that we were all insane, but I didn't care. I did not want to go into that demon store!! I grabbed on to anything that I could to try and prevent them from dragging me in there. Sadly they finally got me inside the damn store. "Alex I know that you just want to torture me, but why the hell do you want me to come in here, Deidara??"

He shrugged, "Like I said, it'll be fun."

I felt the heat rise to my face and noticed that he was still holding my hand from dragging me in, "You know you can let go of my hand now."

"I don't want you running away," He smirked.

"You'd catch me with your ninja speed."

"Then maybe he just wants to hold your hand," Sasori smirked.

I felt even more heat rise to my face, "Shut it Pinocchio!"

Sasori chuckled and walked on ahead with Alex and the rest of them and Deidara and I followed behind. We all started looking around and I couldn't help but blush at a lot of this stuff. I knew I'd never be caught dead in half of it… Unlike Alex who was looking at a rack of thongs… Why? I do not have any idea!!!

"Alex what are you doing?" Itachi came up behind her.

"Just looking," She said before reaching for one of them, "Ohhh…"

"No," Itachi deadpanned.

She looked up at him, "But—"

"No."

"But—"

"No."

"But—"

"No."

"But—"

"No."

"But—"

"Alex he said no!!" I yelled at her.

"…But—!"

"Ugh forget it," I mumbled as I walked off to look at some other stuff followed by Deidara.

"I didn't think Alex was the type to like this stuff, yeah," Deidara laughed.

I chuckled, "I think she's just curious."

"And you're not?

I shrugged, "Not really. I don't really like any of this stuff anyways."

"Well you should try some of it," he said and I gave him a look. A blush soon rose to his cheeks, "I j-just mean that maybe you'll actually like it!"

"Sure, of course," I smiled and looked away with a hint of a blush on my cheeks. After about five minutes Alex had about two or three things that Itachi would let her try on. While she was doing that the guys were trying to get me to try on some lacey bra or something, but since I'm so stubborn I held out until Alex came back out and said that she wanted to get what she just tired on. I forget what she got, though.

I quickly made her pay and left before the guys could shove another undergarment my way. I will never go to that damn store again!!

To relieve the twitching I was feeling, Alex and I went to the book store. I have to say that that store is my favorite in the whole mall, and not just because it has manga. Alex and I went into the back to look at some of the random books they had there and didn't notice that the guys hadn't followed us. We also didn't notice that they had found the manga section and that they found the Naruto series there… Nor did we notice them pick up Volume 43 and turn to chapter 393 'My Eyes…!' No we didn't notice anything until we walked back to the check out with our purchase and saw them in the manga section staring at the book. Alex dropped her bags and slowly walked over—the best she could—to Itachi—who was holding the book.

Itachi was reading about his own death.

"Itachi…" Kisame breathed. "You…you…die…?"

"You're killed by your own brother?" Hidan asked. I was startled when he didn't curse.

"Damn Sasuke…" I heard Alex whisper. She had her head hung down and her fists clenched so hard around her crutches that her knuckled were turning white. I could see the unshed tears in her eyes, though.

I walked over and took the book from Itachi and put it back on the shelf, "He's not the only one who loses their life." I spat out before looking at the guys.

"Who else…?" Sasori asked.

My eyes traveled over each of them, "Sasori…Hidan…Kakuzu…Kisame…Pein…Dei—" I stopped myself. I couldn't say his name. I couldn't… I felt the hot liquid start falling down my face, same as Alex. "The only ones that haven't yet are Tobi and Zetsu. Konan just left…" My voice was hard despite the tears.

"Why did you let him kill you Itachi?" Alex suddenly asked. "Why? Why couldn't you just tell him??"

Itachi didn't say anything; he just walked over and pulled Alex into a gentle embrace. How could he say anything here without blowing his 'bad guy' cover?

That got me thinking… I looked over to Deidara who had nothing but pure shock in his eyes. Just looking at him and knowing that once he goes back he'll be marked for death made my legs become weak. I had to hold on to the bookshelves to prevent myself from falling, "Damn it all… Damn Sasuke…"

"Abby…?" Deidara hesitantly asked.

I looked up to see him staring at me with worry, "If it wasn't bad enough for him to go killing Itachi when he should have gone after Konoha, he also had to make you—" I cut myself off.

"Make him do what?" Sasori asked.

More of the hot tears started to spill over and I clenched my teeth tight, "Why did you have to go and blow yourself up…Deidara?" I started quietly sobbing. Everything that I had been trying to forget came boiling to the surface—the fact that they will have to go back eventually, the fact that once they go back they may not be able to ever come back…the fact that they're all going to _die_. All of them! Not just Deidara, all of them!

I felt a hand on my back and another lifting my head up so that I was looking Deidara directly in the eye, "What do you mean, yeah?"

"T-To kill S-Sasuke you," I choked on a sob but made myself continue in the same hard voice, "You u-u-used the mouth o-on your ch-ch-chest and…" I sniffled and sobbed a bit more, "You blew yourself up… You didn't even get Sasuke!!" My voice raised a level, "You blow yourself up for nothing!" I looked over at Alex who seemed to be explaining things to Itachi just like I was. She was sobbing as well. Who could blame us for crying right now? We've been with these guys for about a month now and have gotten very close to almost all of them. Of course we're going to be sad and mad and cry about the fact that they're all going to die! "Dammit!" I whispered under my breath and hung my head again.

"Come on," Kisame said, "We should go home; Pein-sama will want to know about all of this." Though it wasn't Pein I was afraid of…Madara was the real threat.

We walked quickly through the mall to get to the car. We went so quickly that only Alex and I didn't see Chris, the jackass, and their friends walking by, but the Akatsuki did. Alex and I didn't notice them give the jackass a hard glare before continuing on, but none of them glared as hard as Deidara did. If only I had noticed…

Once we finally got into the car we sat in our same spots. Itachi kept one hand wrapped firmly around Alex's the whole time while Deidara kept his arm wrapped around me while I buried my face in his chest and tried to calm down. By the time we got home both me and Alex had stopped crying. We walked inside the house and went right up to Pein and Konan, and to my displeasure, Tobi was there as well.

"Pein-sama," Sasori said, "Abby and Alexis have some very valuable information."

Pein eyes us, "What is it?"

* * *

Me: Whew! Did you all like it?! I think it turned out pretty damn well!! Even though the last part was kind of sappy and in my opinion a bit quick…but who wouldn't start crying?! Oh and…ugh another reason I haven't updated in a while is because I have lots of drama in my life right now! Well not A LOT but a bit…T.T Apparently my bf wasn't going to dump me on V-Day according to my friend who talked to him…but I still don't know if he was or not… I really hope not O.o… Heh…

Deidara: NO ONE GIVES A SHIT!!!

Me: O.O…. T.T *Goes in emo corner*

Alex: *Hits Deidara* WHAT THE HELL?! Don't be so damn mean!!!

Hidan: He's just mad she's talking about that dude instead of him ;D

Deidara: *Hits Hidan* Shut it baka

Sasori: I'm surrounded by idiots… Review and she'll give you…ummm…

Me: TOBI!!! Or a shirtless Hidan…

Hidan: x3

Me: xD! So review!!!!! Oh and sorry if the Hidan-Bible thing offended anyone…or the fact that Abby actually held her own in such a minor and unimportant fight and didn't die -.- I swear if one person comments on something Marry Sue related for that I will track you down and rip out your gets and put them in a bowel!!! (Heh Inuyasha reference…) But seriously people -.- She was just smart and hid a knife and was quick enough to fucking use it! I don't know about you but that seems like the kind of thing anyone with a brain would do -.-

Sorry for the rant! REIVIEW!!!


	21. Chapter 21

Me: *Is shot* I KNOW I HAVENT UPDATED IN FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOMEN-SAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOMEN GOMEN GOMEN GOMEN GOMEN GOMEN SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WRITER'S BLOCK AND I JUST DIDN'T FEEL LIKE WRITING!!! SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! T.T I really hope this chapter doesn't suck....

Alex: You are so lucky I didn't kill you!

Me: Pfft you get a new chapter this week AND you're going to the damn con!!!!!!!!!!!! *Goes to emo corner*

Itachi: What?

Alex: I'm going to The Con in Orlando this weekend xD

Me: Without me T.T

Alex: You were gone for three months!!

Me: T.T Not my fault!!! It's my brain's fault!!!

Deidara: Isn't that the same thing?

Me: I dunno...ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_

* * *

_

Recap:

_"Pein-sama," Sasori said, "Abby and Alexis have some very valuable information."_

_Pein eyes us, "What is it?"_

* * *

I looked over at Alex who was being led over to the couch by Itachi. They sat down and Itachi pulled her close to him and seemed to be whispering comforting words to her. Looks like I'll have to be speaking. I took a deep breathe and looked up at Pein again, "W-We lied earlier when we t-told you that we didn't know a-all that much..." It was hard to talk under his stare as well as Madara's intense gaze.

"What do you mean?" Pein asked.

I gulped, "We know which of your men die, when they die, the circumstances that lead to their deaths, and whether _your_ plan for 'world peace' really does work."

If Pein noticed my emphasis on 'your', he didn't show it, "Who dies?"

Letting out a humorless laugh I shook my head, "Everyone besides Tobi, Zetsu, and Konan, but she did leave the organization."

Pein eyed me, "How do they all die?"

So I went into a big long explanation of how each of them died, but rushing the explanation of Itachi and Deidara's deaths—Alex and I didn't want to linger on those subjects and I didn't think that Itachi would want the rest of Akatsuki knowing about the truth of the Uchiha Massacre. I also left out the fact that I knew about Nagato and Yahiko and about Madara.

While I was explaining Hidan's death, however, Kakuzu seemed to be getting many anger marks on his forehead.

"You mean I've been trying to kill you all this time and it's as easy as STARVATION?!" Kakuzu yelled at Hidan—according to Narutopedia, Hidan is dying of starvation…

Hidan only stared at him blankly, "Any living thing will die if it doesn't get the nutrients it needs."

Kakuzu fell over anime style and stayed there, spazing out. I only shook my head at them.

Once I had finished all of the explanations Pein seemed to be thinking it over as Konan and Tobi stared at him. After a minute he looked back at me and uttered but two words, "Well, fuck."

Despite my and Alex's depression at the moment, we couldn't help but laugh at that. Pein isn't really the kind of guy to randomly say things like that, now is he?

"Is there any ways for us to prevent this?" Pein asked.

I shrugged, "There are two ways to prevent that. One," I held up one finger, "I just told you all how you die, so you can prevent that from happening easily, and two," I held up two fingers, "The shinobi can't kill you if you don't go back."

Silence. No one spoke. It was totally silent for at least five minutes before Kisame spoke, "It's too soon to know if we'll be going back or not. We haven't even been working on a jutsu to get back. So, for right now, we don't have to worry about any of that since, as Abby says, no shinobi can kill us here. I highly doubt that anyone could kill us here."

Alex sniffled, "Not unless they hit you with a nuclear bomb."

The Akatsuki looked at her with confused looks while I just rolled my eyes, "Yes, Alex, someone is going to come to my house with a nuclear bomb and blow us all up!"

Alex rolled her eyes now, "I was just kidding. And wouldn't that be heaven for Deidara?"

I looked at Deidara who had an eyebrow raised, "What do you all mean, hm?"

Laughing I explained, "We dropped a nuclear bomb on Japan once and it made a _huge_ explosion! I really think you would have liked it. It could probably have been seen for miles and formed a huge mushroom shape in the air."

Deidara smirked, "That sounds like good art, yeah."

Sasori whacked him, "That's not good at all!"

"You'd probably like the memorials and such that we made to honor the heroes of those wars." I said flatly.

Sasori smirked, "I probably would."

"I'd like them if I blew them up, hm." Deidara mumbled.

I felt my face go serious and I walked up to Deidara and poked him in the chest, "As long as you promise me that you don't blow yourself up, I'm good." I looked him straight in the eye.

He looked straight back, "I promise."

"I mean it! Not even as a last resort, ya hear?"

Deidara laughed, "If the country accent means you're serious, then of course, hm."

I smiled, "Well o'course it does!" I said in my most country accent and laughed along with him and looked over at Alex, who was staring at Itachi.

"You better not let Sasuke kill you!" She was yelling at him then looked at me, "What about his sickness?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You know he's sick! Deadly sick! Shouldn't we take him to a hospital or something?" Alex poked Itachi.

I rubbed my chin in thought, "…You know, I think we should!" A thought occurred to me then, "If you haven't been taking your 'medicine' here lately, then how are you still alive and not coughing up blood?"

Itachi stared at me for a minute as a thought line crept onto his forehead, "I've wondered about that as well, and I can't come up with anything."

I nodded, "I see… Does that mean we don't have to take you to a hospital?"

Itachi absently shook his head, "I don't think so, not unless I start to actually show signs of my sickness."

"Well good, I don't want to spend any money on a medical bill for you."

Alex threw the remote at my head, "You would take him if he was still sick!!"

I rubbed my growing bump, "OW ALEX!!!" I went to pick up the lamp but was stopped, "Lemme go!" I tried to wiggle free and turned to see that Kisame had stopped me. I raised an eyebrow.

He smirked, "If you give her a concussion, Itachi won't be happy, and a mad/depressed Itachi isn't something that I want to see. Usually it's just one or the other."

I laughed, "Isn't that the truth." I was then hit with another remote, as was Kisame.

"OW!" We both yelled at Alex who pointed at Itachi who was smirking. Kisame and I looked at each other then back at them, "Well ok then." We both said.

The rest of the night went by pretty quietly and by that night, I had all forgotten about the incident today. I crawled into bed and layed there for about an hour… I couldn't sleep. I sighed and got up to go get some water—Sasori didn't even bother to ask me where I was going. As I walked past Alex's room I looked in to see that Itachi was with Alex in her bed. He was holding her like a parent would their kid and seemed to be muttering comforting words to her.

I guess I was the only one to forget about the incident today. Smiling, I continued on my way to the kitchen to get my water. When I turned from the refrigerator I almost ran right into Kisame, "Holy cheese!!" I said and backed up a bit, "Jeez warn a person would ya?!" I whispered.

He smirked, "Couldn't sleep?"

I glared but replied, "No I couldn't, what about you?"

He shook his head, "No, I just wanted to leave the two love birds alone for a while."

I giggled, "I never thought that Itachi of all people would actually fall in love with a person." It was true. I never really pegged Itachi for that kind of guy. Maybe if he hadn't killed everyone then I'd see him more of a person of the like, but for now, he just didn't seem like it.

"Trust me, he's surprised us all with this. I mean, not only did he actually fall for someone—especially someone as insane as Alex, for reasons unknown to anyone—but he did it in such a short time."

"Yeah really; I guess it's that 'love at first sight' stuff." I shrugged and tried to walk past the big shark.

"It's the exact same with Deidara," I could hear the smirk in his voice.

I turned around and smirked right back, "Well unlike Itachi, Deidara has emotions and isn't just a blob of 'blah' all the time."

Kisame shook his head, "No we're all just surprised he didn't blow you up yet."

My smirk went to a glare, "I'll bet Hidan would be fine with that."

Kisame's shoulders shook with a quiet laugh, "Nah, I don't think so." It was quiet for a minute before he spoke again, "In all seriousness, the whole Akatsuki is actually pretty happy they found someone. I mean, we took the kid away from his home at a young age to a group that doesn't even like him!" He chuckled a bit and I flicked him and he continued, "And with Itachi, well, he just needs someone that'll let him come out of his emotionless shell. I've never in my life seen him smile before he met her."

"He still doesn't smile all that much." I pointed out. "Even when he does, he doesn't smile all that big."

Kisame shrugged, "It's still more than any of us have ever seen."

"Yeah," I smiled, "I guess so. Night Kisame," I walked away.

"Night Abby," He said back. I figured that he'd stay out there a bit longer, or at least until Itachi and Alex were done with their talk.

On the way back I looked into the room again to see that Alex had fallen asleep and Itachi had gone back to his bed. I giggled and went back to my room…. Only to be scared half to death when Sasori spoke.

"Kisame's right about all of it, you know."

After I made sure I wasn't going to have a freaking heart attack I went to my bed and sat down on it, "Yeah? And what are your thoughts on all of that, eavesdropper?"

I heard him chuckle, "I can't really add to a lot of that; at least I can't add to the whole 'Itachi and Alex' thing, since I barely talk to Itachi except at meetings."

"Ok, well goodnight then." I was halfway laying down when Sasori spoke again.

"I can add to your and Deidara's situation, though." I sat up and stared at him and urged him on—even though I really wanted to sleep. "Almost everyone in Akatsuki gave up on actually finding someone to be with. Even though it seemed like Itachi didn't care, he still seemed like he wanted someone to be close to him like Alex is."

"I thought you didn't know much about Itachi," I smirked.

He glared and I shut up, "However, with Deidara it was very much apparent that he wanted someone in his life that he could turn to, since no one in the Akatsuki liked him much. Well besides Tobi, but Tobi doesn't really count. Not to mention, he's 19. When I was his age, I had already made myself into a puppet and even before then I can vaguely remember not even caring about being with another person. Deidara and Itachi are the only two in Akatsuki who ever did."

I laughed, "Konan, too!" He gave me a confused stare, "She's a girl, and she must have some emotion! You can't honestly tell me you don't think she wants someone, too?"

Sasori smirked, "No, I guess I can't."

I nodded, "Good! Now then, I am going to sleep. Goodnight!"

"Goodnight."

With that I finally layed down and fell asleep.

I looked around the corner of the hallway, examining the living room, looking for my prey. I saw him sitting on the couch and smirked before looking up to see Alex had done the same thing from the kitchen. Both our prey were sitting on the couch. I reached down into my 'weapons pouch' and pulled out one of the items. I looked back up to Alex and gave a signal. At once we both jumped out from our hiding spots and ran straight to the couch as fast as we could and pounced on our prey.

"Got you!" Alex said as she held down Itachi and took out a brush from her 'weapons pouch' as I sat on Deidara and began using my 'weapon' on him.

He glared at me, "What are you doing, hm?"

I smiled, "What does it look like? We're just making you look pretty!"

"'Pretty' isn't a word that I thought was in your vocabulary."

"Well usually it's not, but in this case it is," I continued to brush his hair.

He twitched, "Well why are you doing this to us, yeah?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Alex asked like it really was the most obvious thing in the world—which it was. Itachi raised an eyebrow at her, "You two have some of the longest hair in the Akatsuki besides Konan! We've been dying to do something with it!"

Itachi somewhat glared at Alex—pfft you know that he could never full out glare at her, "Konan has the same length of hair as me. Why me?"

Alex smiled, "Because she's a girl and you're a guy! It's always more fun to do it to a guy!"

"Especially when he has hair as awesome as this," I held up Deidara's bangs for emphasis, revealing the fact that he didn't have the little scope in.

"Well thank you for the compliment," he said, "But could you please get off of me, un?"

I looked down to see that I was still sitting on him whereas Alex had just cornered Itachi in the corner of the couch, "Oops?" I said as I got off and let him sit up again, but ninja-ed behind him to continue with my grooming. "Now this is fun, but seriously when is the last time you two brushed your hair??" It was true, their hair seemed to be an abundance of knots!

"We're shinobi," Itachi said, "We don't care about petty things like that."

"Well you should!" Alex said while staring in awe at Itachi with his hair out of the pony tail.

I laughed at her fangirl-ness and went to take Deidara's hair out of the one ponytail as well then took off the headband, "You know, just because you have awesome long blond hair doesn't mean that a person has to look like a girl," I told Alex.

She shrugged, "Just because you didn't think he was a she the first time you saw him doesn't mean that other's didn't think that he was really a she when it was obvious he was a he."

"Do I want to know what she just said?" Deidara asked.

"No one wants to know what she says," Hidan commented then sighed, "I thought we were supposed to be Akatsuki!"

"We are," Itachi commented.

Hidan glared, "Akatsuki don't let little girls do their hair."

"You're just jealous you're not getting an awesome makeover!" Alex told him.

He rolled his eyes, "Yeah that's it."

"Why aren't you cursing?" I said.

"I don't have to fucking curse in every single damn sentence that comes out of my damn mouth you know!"

"There's the Hidan we all know and somewhat love!" I smiled.

"Hey!" Alex said, "Focus!"

"Right!" I got right back to work.

After about half an hour of just getting out the big knots—and many 'Ow! That hurts dammit!'s from Deidara and perverted comments from Kisame and Hidan about that and the faces that the two boys were making—then another half an hour of just brushing to get the hair to be somewhat manageable and finding the necessary tools needed for the rest—which took another half an hour—we finally had our finished products!!

"Kill me," Itachi deadpanned.

"Not unless you kill me first, un," Deidara monotonously commented back.

Kisame was refraining from laughing, "Well, pfft, you do look, pffft, _pretty_! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He fell over laughing so much…

Hidan was less modest about the laughter, "BWAHAHAHA YOU TWO LOOK SO FUCKING GIRLY!!"

Deidara and Itachi were twitching now. Both of them had pins in their hair as well as ribbons holding up their hair in different styles. Itachi had his normal ponytail, but with a ribbon, and pins holding back his bangs. Deidara had his hair in two side pigtails held up with ribbons and a pin holding back his bangs.

Alex and I couldn't stop laughing even though the two were glaring at us with 'I-Swear-I-Would-So-Kill-You-Right-Now' written all over them. They shook their heads and left the living room to try and undo what we had done to them and came back a few minutes later in normal hairstyles to see us still giggling about it all.

"My sides still hurt," I commented.

"I can barely breathe," Alex said.

We both looked over to Deidara and Itachi expecting to be yelled at, but seeing something totally different; they were smirking.

My giggling stopped, "I sense danger." I got up and tried to run to my room but was caught almost immediately.

"Oh no you don't, hm." Deidara smirked.

"Let me go!" I thrashed around and noticed that Itachi had captured Alex as well and they both dragged us to my room where Konan was standing with a smirk as well. "Wh-What are you going to do to us??"

"Are you going to really kill us??"

"No," Itachi said. That was the last thing said before all hell broke loose…

After two hours of yelling, screaming, kicking, hitting, threatening, laughing—mostly chuckling done by the two males—and Konan forcing us into clothing Alex and I sat in the living room ready to shoot up the town. They had found my cousin's box of makeup that she'd left the last time she'd come here, as well as her hair stuff—that's where we got the ribbons and pins—as well as some clothes that my parents had gotten me that I'd never be caught dead wearing. Well, I was officially dead because for some reason Konan knew how to apply makeup very well and had a pretty good fashion sense and Itachi and Deidara knew about this…

Alex and I were now wearing a bunch of preppy makeup, accessories, and clothing. Almost all of it was the cruelest, foulest, and most revolting color ever.

Pink.

We were covered in it.

Makeup, ribbons, clothing, everything. The only things that weren't pink were our—gag—skirts, and—gag—heels and eye makeup—the liner and mascara, the eye shadow was pink.

We were twitching.

"I hate you both," I said. They both sat beside us on the couch and were smirking—well Itachi was Itachi-smirking.

"Aww but you look so cute, un."

"Much more feminine."

"Don't make me punch you," Alex said in what she thought was threatening I-mean-it voice, when it was really I-couldn't-hurt-a-puppy voice.

Itachi chuckled and put his arm around her, "Of course you would."

I glared at Deidara, "Well I mean it."

He put on a face of innocence, "You really think I knew that you hated pink? Why, I thought you loved that color!" His voice was even innocent sounding.

I smirked, "Use that for when people interrogate you?"

He smirked back, "Perhaps, hm."

I began to laugh and pulled my legs up to sit criss-cross-applesauce on the couch at the same time Alex did. Yes we did forget about our skirts, and yes Hidan and Kisame were there, and yes they did start staring and smiling pervertedly, and yes we did immediately scream and put our legs down.

"Couldn't you have at least put us in skorts?!" Alex asked.

"Nope," Itachi replied, "That wouldn't be torture."

"And you're the expert on that."

"Why yes I am." He smirked.

I glared at Alex, "Why'd you have to pick the Jashin-damn sadist?"

Alex whacked me, "You know just as well as I do that he's not a sadist!"

"Do you even know what that means?"

"Of course I do!"

"Just making su—Alex…"

"…What?"

"What's this weekend?"

Alex thought for a minute, "The 13th?"

"FUDGE!" I ran to the calendar, "FUDGE, FUDGE, FUDGE, FUDGE!!!"

Alex, Itachi, and Deidara came walking over and Deidara spoke up, "What is it?"

I pointed at the calendar, "Mega Con."

"Shit," Alex said.

"What's 'Mega Con'?" Itachi asked.

"A convention for anime and junk! We already bought our tickets and cosplay! ABBY WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!" Alex ran over and shook me.

I got her off, "Let me breathe first!! Jeez," I thought for a minute. Alex and I had bought those tickets online two months ago and had informed our parents of it. Somehow they had agreed that we could go by ourselves—we have no idea why. Point blank, we have been excited for this trip for months and now we have a serious speed bump… "Well we can't go to an anime convention with the Akatsuki! They'd kill half the cosplayers there…"

Alex nodded, "That's true." It was quiet for a minute, then Alex broke out into a mischievous grin, "Well what if they knew they were just cosplayers and not the real thing?"

I shook my head, "People would still stare!"

"At what? Good cosplay?"

I raised an eyebrow, "What are you thinking Alex?"

"I'm thinking that we could get them tickets as well and when we go as Sakura and Hinata, they could go as, well, themselves!!"

"You're insane!"

"You know it would work."

"They don't have their cloaks."

"Online speed delivery."

"They could still attack someone."

"They don't have chakra."

"Akatsuki at Mega Con…" I trailed off, "That…might just be… The most epic thing ever!"

Alex nodded, "Yup."

I broke out into a huge smile, "ALEX THAT'S PERFECT!!"

"What's with all the damn yelling?" Hidan came over and asked. For reasons unbeknownst to even me I ran over and glomped Hidan, "What the hell??"

"THIS WEEKEND IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUCKING FUN!!!!" I yelled.

"Why…?" Hidan asked hesitantly.

I looked up at him, "Akatsuki is going to Mega Con!"

"And that is…?"

"A convention for anime!" I poked him in the chest, "YOU are anime!"

He raised an eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes, "If we order you all cloaks online then you all could go!! You know, get out of my little house!"

Something akin to hope entered Hidan's eyes, "Really?" I nodded and he started to hug me back, "FINALLY! I'VE BEEN GETTING SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS PLACE!!!

"Ack! H-Hidan! You all went out yesterday!"

"Still!" He hugged me tighter.

"C-Can't breathe!!"

"Hey Deidara," I heard Kisame speak, "Looks like Hidan's moving in on your girl."

My face went red as many things happened at once, I nearly fainted from the sudden blood rush, Hidan bluntly remarked, "That bastard only wishes," and Deidara came over and pried him off of me and pulled me into a hug all in one quick motion. That all happened in a few seconds. Not that I really minded.

"Tch, you only wish she'd actually go for a masochist like you, hm," Deidara snapped and smirked.

Hidan glared, "Don't try me pretty boy."

"He's not pretty, he's hot!" I immediately put my hand over my mouth when everyone stared at me for my outburst, "I said that out loud… Fuck…" I averted my eyes from Deidara's and wiggled out of his hold, "I-I'll just go b-buy those cl-cloaks now." I went over to the computer and went onto Amazon. After buying the necessary number as well as actual cosplay for each person—and making sure that it would be speed delivery—I got up and stared at everyone, "Congratulations all! You'll _all_ be leaving my house this weekend!"

They all perked up and looked over at me. Pein spoke—of course, "What do you mean?"

"Yeah, what does Abby-chan mean?!" Tobi asked.

I rolled my eyes and explained how they were all going to Mega Con with us, and what Mega Con was.

"Why do we have to go with you?" Pein asked.

I glared, "If you want to actually get out of this house for a whole entire day then you'll want to go, and Alex and I aren't missing this! And we can't leave you all alone for such a long time!"

Pein glared.

I glared back, "You're going, and that's final."

"We don't have to listen to little girls."

"Oh come on Pein," Konan spoke up, "It wouldn't hurt."

Pein's jaw tightened and he glanced at Tobi who gave a very small nod and Pein looked back at me, "Fine."

I smiled, "Good. We'll make sure you all look perfect for then, and more like yourselves!" At the moment they looked like pretty normal people actually…

"Alright!" Kisame said, "Two weekends in a row we get to get out of here!"

I nodded, "Yup." I was excited for the Akatsuki to go to Mega Con, though I don't think I would have been so excited if I had known what exactly would be happening at The Con…

* * *

Me: Long time to update…short chapter…not much happened… You all have permission to disown me T.T

Alex: NO!

Me: O.o Why?

Alex: If you die then no more Kitty Kurse!!!

Me: …Yeah… OH! I DID GO TO MEGA CON!! YAY!!! I got a tail, a Gaara plushie and a Tobi one, pocky (I am now addicted), and an Akatsuki wallet! WHOOT! Oh and on a very random note, if anyone listens to Charlie Daniels's _Still in Saigon_, doesn't it remind you of Itachi? And _Dead or Alive_ kind of reminds me of Akatsuki…

Itachi: How does that remind you of me?

Me: One part of the song goes "My brother calls me a killer and my daddy calls me a vet" And another goes, "All the sounds of long ago will be forever in my head, mingles with the wounded cries and the silence of the dead." I just like it…

Deidara: Insane…

Me: That's me! PLEASE REVIEW!! And I apologize ahead of time if there's a long wait again… I really am sorry!! Oh!! TOMORROW'S MY BIRTHDAY! LET'S GET ME TO 400 REVIEWS!!! (With the rate this thing gets them, I wouldn't be surprised if I got 400 by this time next week!)

JA NE!!


	22. Chapter 22

Me: Sorry for the late update…again… I've been really lazy… I don't have much to say here though, so I'll just let you all continue! But read the stuff all the way at the bottom when you're done! Thanks ;D

* * *

The next day the cloaks had arrived—I was very surprised how fast they got here—and Alex and I immediately took all of them inside and put them on the designated members. I must say that the cloaks looked pretty good on them.

"How do they feel?" I asked after they finished putting them on.

"Nothing like our old ones," Hidan said.

"Well I figured that much. This is cosplay; not clothing you'd wear every day!"

"They could at least get the feel of it half right!"

"Well too bad, deal with it." Hidan glared but stayed quiet nonetheless and I turned to the rest of them, "How is everyone else's?" They all nodded but wore faces of annoyance. "I know the fabric isn't all that great, but it's something! Now Saturday you'll just wear those all day, ok? Oh and these too…" I walked away to go get another box I ordered and pulled out the clothing that they usually wear, as well as Hidan's scythe and Samehada, "Thought you might like these."

"Normal clothes and Samehada!" Kisame grabbed his and ran to the bathroom to change.

I stared after him, "Someone's happy."

"Gimme that shit!" Hidan grabbed his and ran to the other bathroom.

Deidara, Sasori, and Itachi grabbed theirs and went to change in the bedrooms and soon enough they all came back and Pein, Konan, Kakuzu, Tobi, and Zetsu—ok not so much Zetsu—went to change as well. While they did that, I went on the computer and purchased their tickets as well and printed it out and all that stuff, and then we had fully dressed Akatsuki in front of us.

Alex and I stared in awe of them; we haven't seen them in full uniform yet. It was silent for a moment…at least until Alex screamed and hugged Itachi with all her might. I laughed at his face—it went from shocked to very soft and he hugged her back in his Itachi way. I laughed at them before I was suddenly hugged from behind and looked back to see a wall of blond hair.

"How can you be a ninja with such bright hair?" I asked the wall.

"I snuck up on you didn't I, hm?"

"True, but I'm not an ANBU."

"Still."

"Would you four save that for your bedrooms??" Hidan blurted out and three of the four mentioned—Itachi, Alex, and Deidara—glared at him while I just felt my face heat up.

"Would you keep your perverted comments to yourself?" Deidara glared.

Hidan smirked, "Nah, I'm good."

Of course that was nothing compared to what happened the next day, Wednesday. I did mention that everything happens to me on a Wednesday, right? Well it does… I was sitting in my room listening to my music when out of nowhere Alex runs past me out into the living room…with another one of my bras on her head!! My eyes went wide, "ALEX YOU BITCH COME BACK HERE!!" I immediately got up and ran after her, but was too late. She was already sitting on the couch with everyone staring at her.

Then when she saw me, she jumped up and started running again, "Oh no! Abby's gonna kill me!!"

"You're damn right I am!" I yelled as I chased her around the house again and grabbed the remote and chucked it at her. Sadly I missed and it hit the wall instead and broke almost in half. I stopped and stared at it, "Fuck…my parents are going to kill me…"

"You think that's the only reason they'll kill you?" Kakuzu asked.

"What else is there?"

He gestured to himself and the rest of the Akatsuki.

"Oh yeah…"

Alex came up behind me, "You better fix that or people are going to eat you…"

"People will eat me?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah, I would."

I stared at her.

"What? You look like you would taste good!"

"That she does, hm," Deidara commented with a thoughtful face.

My face on the other hand was once again turning red, "Excuse me?!"

Deidara came out of his pondering and shrugged, "Well I do, and you know I speak my mind, yeah."

That made me think back to that one day when he helped me with the laundry…before a certain someone cheated on me… I couldn't help but smile, "That you do."

The rest of the week—all two days of it—went by rather quickly. Nothing too important happened, though Friday it rained, a lot, and Tobi—being Tobi—got excited and ran out into it like the idiot he is. Zetsu followed him out, forgetting their position as well, and then was followed out by Kisame, too. So, when Alex and I came home we were greeted with three little kitties, and after we sweat dropped for a grand total of ten minutes I got a bucket, filled it with hot water, and splashed it on them, also forgetting what happens when they poof back...

"ABBY NOT AGAIN!!!" Alex yelled and shielded her eyes.

"I'M SORRY! I FORGOT! YOU DID, TOO, BAKA!!!"

"YEAH BUT I ALWAYS FORGET THESE THINGS!! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S SUPPOSED TO REMIND ME OF THESE THINGS!!!"

"Would you two stop all that damn yelling?! Just get their cloaks!!!" Hidan said, er yelled. We both looked over at him, holding three cloaks and threw them at us, "Jeez talk about your virgins..."

Alex and I glared at him and threw the cloaks at the three members in need of them and stalked over to Hidan, "What was that?" We said in unison.

Hidan raised an eyebrow, "Huh?"

"You don't talk like that," I said.

"To a girl," Alex finished as we both grabbed a lamp and started chasing him around the house, "DIE!!!" We yelled at him.

"Jeez, what's with you crazy-ass bitches?!"

We started yelling at him even louder and chasing him faster, "YOU BASTARD!!!" Eventually we did get him and hit him a few times with our lamps of doom, but decided not to hit him too much so that he didn't look like a weakling Hidan at Mega Con. I guess you could count that as something important though... Oh well. After all of that I went online to get directions to Mega Con. I really hope Itachi won't get us all killed in a car accident. You'd think that him being a ninja we'd be able to avoid any things of the sort. We'll see tomorrow I suppose.

Alex and I made sure to get everyone to bed early since we'll have to get up around four to get ready and leave by six... Hey, even the actual Akatsuki need some time to get ready!! So we all went to bed around ten, but I couldn't sleep, again. So, I sat up in bed and waited for Sasori to start talking. Of course, he did.

"Can't sleep?"

"No, I'm just sitting up and talking in my sleep."

"Is that so? What an unusual talent," I could once again hear the smirk in his voice.

"Don't make me come down there." I threatened.

"I don't think Deidara would like that very much." Sasori chuckled.

I was about to say something when the other person in the room spoke, "No, actually, I wouldn't like that, hm."

I felt slight heat on my face but smirked nonetheless, "Awww so that means no more fun nights with Sasori? Deidara you're so mean!" It was silent for a while, "Did I kill your brains boys?"

"Well I think you killed Deidara's," Sasori spoke, "I was just waiting to see what he'd say."

"Deidara?" I looked in the direction he was in, "Did I kill you?"

"As a matter of fact, I think you did, un."

"My bad?" I laughed, "Ok this isn't helping me to sleep. At all." I sighed and felt an indent in the side of my bed and looked over to see Deidara's figure next to me, "C-Can I help y-you?" He didn't say anything, he just layed down next to me and I once again used him as my own personal pillow, "Well I guess this works." I soon fell asleep. I should use my pillow more often, ne?

* * *

"Abby, wake up, un." A voice said from beside me. I ignored it, I was still asleep, I wanted to sleep more, "Wake up," The voice poked me and I just rolled away from it. It was quiet for a while and I wasn't being poked… For a while… Then the voice was right by my ear, "Wake up, now," and my side was then bitten.

My eyes shot open and I sat up quickly and looked to my side to see Deidara smirking and on the verge of laughter, "What is it with you and biting me??"

He shrugged, "Because Alex was right and you taste good, hm."

I narrowed my eyes at him and shook my head, "Ah whatever, what time is it?" I looked at the clock to see that it was 5:00, "Well fudge…." I got up off the bed and turned on the light, "Is anyone else up?"

Pein walked through the door, "Alex is the only one still asleep." He was in his full cosplay, "Everyone else is ready besides you three and her."

"Ok, I'll go wake her up," I walked out the door and went to her room to see that she was, indeed, still asleep. I rolled my eyes and crept up right beside her, took a deep breath, "ALEX WAKE UP! THERE'S A YAOI FEST GOING ON IN THE LIVING ROOM WITH ITACHI, SASORI, AND DEIDARA!!!!"

Before I had time to blink Alex had gotten up and ran right out into the living room—no I don't know how she did it will a broken leg—yelling, "ITACHI HOW COULD YOU?!" I fell on the bed laughing and started choking on air when she continued, "ABBY, YOU LIED!!!" Then came running back in and glared at me, "Not funny."

After I stopped laughing I got up and looked her right in the eye, "It woke you up, didn't it?"

"Yelling in my ear like that would wake anyone up."

"Ah, touché," I looked at the clock to see it was 5:10, "Come on, we have to get ready." I jumped over the bed and ran into the master bedroom to get out mine and Alex's cosplay—Hinata and Sakura; I was Hinata since I am more introverted than Alex is. I brought the Sakura cosplay into Alex's room and threw the outfit at her, "Get dressed now! I'll help you with the wig later."

She nodded, "Yeah, ok."

I left and closed the door behind me and went to my room to see Sasori and Deidara chatting, "Oi, you two go get into your outfits!"

After fifty minutes of getting into my outfit, putting on our wigs, making sure the Akatsuki looked passable as just cosplayers, but still looked like really good Akatsuki ones, putting in my and Alex's contacts—I hate things around my eye, so that was a feat in and of itself—and getting everyone food, and then making sure we had enough money and Alex and I had our phones and video camera, and making sure everyone went to the bathroom before we left—there shall be no potty breaks while we drive there!—and getting the mapquest directions we finally all got into the damn van with Alex and Itachi up in front. Talk about your long ass sentence…

Dear Jashin I hope Itachi doesn't crash us!!

The row behind them consisted of Kisame, Deidara, Sasori, and me—I had to share a seat with Deidara—and behind us was Pein, Konan, Kakuzu, and Hidan—Pein and Konan shared a seat—and in the very back were Tobi and Zetsu—the plant part actually fit!! Yay!!!

Only fifteen minutes into the drive, and I was already annoyed out of my mind! Tobi was rattling on about Jashin-Knows-What which was evidentially pissing off Hidan making Pein yell at Hidan and Konan try to calm him down, and Sasori, Kisame, and Alex were throwing perverted comments around about—do I really need to say?—Deidara and I while Deidara was yelling at them and I was twitching. Fifteen minutes of our hour and a half drive. I don't think I can take this much longer…

Luckily I didn't have to! Remind me to thank Itachi later since he finally became the voice of reason when his monotonous voice sounded from the driver's seat, "If all of you don't shut up right now I am driving this car off the road into the nearest house and killing all of you!"

It was completely silent then as we all stared at Itachi who kept his eyes on the road.

"Awesome," Alex breathed and I sweat dropped; of course she'd say something like that. Eventually we all started talking again, but it was soon very, very boring. "I'm bored," Alex complained.

"Then think of something to do," Sasori leaned over from his seat.

"Oh now you did it…" I mumbled.

"What do you mean?" He turned to look at me.

"Just watch," I pointed at Alex who had a thinking look upon her face.

After only a few seconds her face brightened up and she pointed at Sasori, "TRUTH OR DARE SASORI!!!"

I started to twitch and Sasori stared at her like she was insane, "What?"

"It's a game, silly!"

"Oh jee, thanks Alex!!" I yelled at her.

She looked at me confused, "What?"

I glared, "YOU MADE ME LOSE THE FRICKEN JASHIN DAMN GAME!!!"

She glared back, "NOW I LOST IT!!"

I smirked, "Good."

"What the shit is 'The Game'?" Hidan asked from the back of the car.

Alex and I shook our heads, "You don't wanna know." Alex pointed at Sasori again, "So, truth or dare! Pick one dammit!!!"

Sasori gave pleading looks to the other members, but none offered help so he just turned back to her, "Ano… Truth?"

She pouted, "Wimp! Fine… Let's see here… Umm…" She contemplated for a few moments before, "Do you still feel the need to, as Chris says, 'Kill a kitten'?"

I slapped my forehead, "He doesn't know what that means!!!"

Sasori stared at her, "Why would I kill a baby cat…?"

"Why would any of us ever kill a kitten again??" Kisame asked.

Alex shook her head, "No, Chris says that every time you 'have fun' with yourself, God kills a kitten!!" I was simply amazed at how bluntly she said that while the rest of us stared at her, "What? That's what he says!" She leaned over to Sasori, "So? Do you?"

He glared at her, "I'm a puppet, so no."

She pouted, "Awww, fine!" She turned back around to face forward.

At some point, after we made Hidan kiss Kisame's foot—don't ask how we managed that in a car or how we actually got him to do that...let's just say there was a 'sacrifice involved—and found out that Kakuzu actually wanted to be a lawyer the dare had gone to Pein—who was actually playing for reasons unbeknownst to us—and guess what the dare was. That's right! To streak at Mega Con!

…

…

…

…

…

Did you believe me?

No?

Good!

No, the real dare was for him to kiss Konan—courtesy of Alex and I—and only Alex, me, and Konan showed any interest in that. Well, Pein was twitching, "Are you serious?" We nodded, he sighed, "Fine!" He faced Konan and almost too quickly he pecked her on the lips and broke away. It was so quick, and yet I could see the pink on both their cheeks. And you know what else?

I had my camera out and got the perfect picture, "HA I _AM_ A NINJA!!!"

"What are you yelling about?" Kakuzu asked.

I showed him the picture and he broke out laughing. Requests to see the picture came from all over the car and I showed everybody the picture and do you know what Alex said when I showed her the sweet, loving picture? Well I shall tell you!

"Lemme see the camera!" Alex grabbed at it and I tossed it to her. She stared at it and then pointed right at it, "THAT IS SO MY WALLPAPER!!"

Konan blushed even more when I started laughing even more and she glared at me, "Well how about this? Truth or Dare, Abby?"

"Pfft with you all I'm not afraid! I'll take dare," I said confidently.

She smirked, "Ok, I dare you to kiss Deidara."

"And now I am petrified of you all," I glared at her.

She shrugged, "A dare's a dare."

I just stared, "Seriously, are you sure you weren't born in this world??" She shook her head and pointed at Deidara. I pouted, "Yeah, yeah," I looked over at Deidara and was millimeters from my second kiss when I realized something. I turned to Alex, "Give me the camera." Alex glared but gave me the camera nonetheless, "Thank you." I reached around and put it in my bag where she couldn't ninja it out then turned back to Deidara, but didn't get the chance to kiss him because _he_ kissed _me_ instead.

It was short, less hesitant and gentle than last time, but amazing all the same.

_And now I sound like a sappy love novel._

**Yes, yes you do.**

_Where have YOU been?_

**I think you forgot about me, so I think I was hibernating.**

_I'm not even gonna ask._

Pushing my inner aside I came back to reality and checked to make sure there weren't any photos of my kissing on my camera. There wasn't. Yay!

"Oh, Abby," Alex cooed from the front of the car. I looked to see she had the video tape running, "I. Am. Ninja."

Glaring, I put my hand over the lens and pushed it down, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever."

The rest of the ride was pretty normal. We put in some CDs and Alex and I sang along to the songs while the Akatsuki listened.

That's when a thought occurred to me, "FUCK!" Everyone stared at me, "When you all were cats I was singing to my iPod! Oh the shame!!"

Deidara hugged me from behind, "But it was good, hm."

I twitched, "You all must be tone deaf." They all laughed at me—well I think it was more 'with' me, but whatever—and soon we were paying for parking and parked in the parking lot. Wow, a lot of 'park' in that sentence.

We all got out and headed for the doors of the place. It was now 8:00 and there was already a big-ass line… Good thing I had bought the tickets ahead of time, ne? We walked up, got the wristband thingies, struggled for about ten minutes putting them on, and then, we entered Mega Con.

Akatsuki was now in Mega Con with Alex limping along with her crutches. This just proves how dedicated people can be.

The first hour of it was full of Alex and I spotting people from things like Inuyasha, Death Note (We took pictures with the L), Bleach, and Ouran High School Host Club—I took a picture with the Twins and they actually had the whole Host Club there and they started doing their thing with Alex and I. It was quite funny to see Itachi and Deidara's faces before they dragged us away.

Those were some good cosplayers though…

Later when we were resting in a lobby-area right outside of the place where all the merchandise was being sold, this girl came running up to us and stared at the Akatsuki, "Oh my fucking Jashin. These are the best Akatsuki cosplayers I've seen all day!" She ran over to Kakuzu and started to run her fingers over the stitches, "They feel so real!"

**Looks like we have a major otaku on our hands.**

_I can handle this._ I got up and looked at the stitches with her, "Well that's what you get with the awesome makeup that is available, ne?"

The girl nodded, "Oh yeah, though I've never seen cosplayers so dedicated! At least not here in America at Mega Con."

"True," Alex put in, "The best ones are always in Japan, or on youtube, or both."

The girl moved on to Kisame, "How did you get his skin to be such a nice shade of blue??"

"Paint of course. People always make him out to be this deep blue, when all you really need to do is get a sound light shade of blue and just put it on his face, chest, and halfway up his arms and legs," I shrugged. "Hey, what's your name?"

The girl looked up from her inspection to me, "Olivia Allen, you?" She then went right on to Zetsu, "The plant is so real!! Same with their eyes and hair! How did you all _do_ this??"

"Like I said, if you take the time and have the proper tools, it can be possible, and I'm Abby and this is Alex."

She nodded and stopped all movement when she saw Hidan, "Dear Jashin…" She walked up to him and immediately hug attacked him making him drop his scythe—which I might add was of great quality seeing as I bought it online.

"Oi, what the fuck??" Hidan flinched away from her.

Alex and I looked at each other and smirked, "Hidan otaku."

Olivia looked up from her hugging, "What was your first clue? I mean just look at him! He's so hot." All three of us started laughing. "I swear you all are some of the best cosplayers ever!" She continued hugging Hidan, who was getting used to the hugging… I know, I'm not all that surprised either! She broke off and looked at us, "Do you all fangirl people from Akatsuki, too?"

"It's not really 'fangirling' anymore…" Alex mumbled and I nudged her in the side.

"Well if we had to pick, I'm pretty sure that this one here," I nudged Alex again, "Would pick Itachi—"

"And you'd pick Deidara," Alex poked me.

I glared.

She glared.

I held up my finger.

She held up her finger.

And World War Three began, via poking…

After about a minute Tobi joined in and after another minute so did Kisame, and then Itachi broke it up by poking us all in the forehead.

"Damn the weasel poke!" Alex cursed and Itachi just smirked.

I rubbed my forehead and looked back at Olivia who was giving us a Yeah-I'd-Do-The-Same-Thing look, "Heh sorry about that," I apologized.

She shrugged, "Hey, it's fine—"

"Olivia, come on! You can rape the Hidan cosplayers later!" Someone called from a little ways away.

Olivia twitched, "And that would be my friend who loves to torture me."

"Don't worry," I slumped over, "Alex is my personal torture chamber."

"Well, good luck with all the other otakus!" She gave Hidan one last glomp and had us take a picture of her and him before leaving with her friend.

"Well," Hidan stared after her, "That was interesting."

After another hour of walking around my laziness caught up with me and was able to get a piggy-back ride on Deidara—score!—while everyone else walked.

People actually stared at us when we walked by, though I would too if I saw a Hinata being piggy-backed around by a Deidara. Wouldn't you? Yes, you would.

**You enjoy yourself way too much.**

_Ok, you were absent for Jashin-knows-how-long, and now you just randomly pop up?_

**Is this a problem?**

_Nah… I need someone to talk to in my mind!_

**You're right, this isn't the problem, you're the one **_**with**_** the problem!**

I ignored my inner as we walked around more and came to the candy stand, "STOP!!" I jumped off of Deidara, grabbed the huge package of pocky, paid the man, put the pocky in my backpack, and got back on Deidara, "Ok, we're good!!"

"What the hell is that stuff?" Kakuzu asked.

"I shall show you when we get home!" I said mischievously.

He rolled his eyes and we kept walking throughout the merchandise. It was hilarious when we passed by a plushie station and they all saw their plushie forms. I honestly think they think they think they're being stalked somehow.

It was less funny, however, when we came across a stand that had a bunch of fanart drawings of people. And two of those people were Sakura and Hinata.

You all know how people draw Hinata ALL THE TIME, right? Well that's exactly how she and Sakura were pictured in these fanarts.

Alex and I twitched when we saw them and nearly punched a hole in the wall when Sasori asked, "That's who you're supposed to be dressed as?"

"Yes and no," Alex replied.

"That's just some guys sick, twisted interpretation of what anime girls should look like," I glared at it.

A smirk made its way to his lips, "Awww well that must be depressing news for Itachi and the brat."

Alex glared at him while my eye started twitching again, "Don't make me turn you into firewood."

He glared right back, "Annoying little girl…"

I just rolled my eyes as we made our way back to the lobby area and lounged about for a while… Until this girl wearing nothing but what seemed to me to be a bikini bottom, a low cut shirt, and a cape came up to Itachi.

"Hey there," She purred, "That's some nice Itachi cosplay."

"Hn," Was all he said as Alex leaned into him with an evil look.

"What are you looking at?" The girl asked Alex.

Alex looked her up and down, "Apparently some sort of human being, but I'm not too sure."

She glared at her and looked back up at Itachi, "So what's your name?"

Itachi looked to Alex who looked to me who looked back at Itachi and I mouthed 'Nick'. He nodded, "Nick." I must say that was the first time anyone knew what I was mouthing…

"Oh? I'm Ashley."

"ARE YOU FUDGING SERIOUS??" I burst out and sat down on the ground next to Deidara pouting. I swear every single slut like girl I have come into contact with since the Akatsuki came here has been named Ashley!

Ashley stared at me but shook off my outburst and looked back at Itachi, "That's a nice name. Where exactly do you live in Florida? Or did you come from out of state?" Normally this would be considered a reasonable question, right? Well that all depends on the tone. Usually people use a I'm-really-just-curious tone whereas she's using a I-want-to-get-you-home tone…. Oh how stupid this girl can be…

Alex was now twitching profusely and stepped between her and Itachi, "I don't think it's any of your business where we're from."

The girl gave Alex a sour look, "I believe I was talking to him, not you."

"And I believe you should stay away from taken men," Alex smirked.

Ashley gave a look of you've-got-to-be-kidding-me, "You and him? You're not serious."

I knew Alex must have felt like the bitch just slapped her, but she didn't show it, "Actually what I don't believe is that you could honestly think that It—_Nick_ would ever even think about looking at you twice! I am amazed at the stupidity of the world ever day."

"Excuse me? I believe you are the idiot here, thinking that Nick here actually likes a bitch like you." Ashley smirked.

I got up, "Hey wait a minute, bitch, you don't know her! You don't know about her and Nick, so just do yourself a favor and shut up before you make yourself out as an even bigger idiot."

She looked at me, "Excuse me?"

"You tend to say that a lot, but I don't believe that any of us are willing to excuse you."

"Tch, I wasn't talking to you, so just back off," She hissed.

I was about to say something when Alex cut me off, "No, Abby, let me handle this." I nodded and she continued, "You don't know anything about Nick here, so please, just leave."

"Well I at least know enough about men in general that they'd always leave the girl they have for one that's better," she snapped and I winced. It reminded me of the Ashley at my school… And… Well you know.

Deidara put his arm around me. He didn't say anything, but I knew he knew what was going through my mind right now. I couldn't help but smile and stare at him for a minute, the fight between Alex and the random girl tuning out. At least until I heard, "Alex, stop!" and then a scream from Ashley. I broke my stare from Deidara's face to look at the scene before me. All I could process from it was that Alex had just punched the girl in the face.

"Shit…"

* * *

Me: THIS CHAPTER IS LONGER THAN THE OTHER ONE EVEN WITHOUT THE AUTHOR'S NOTE SO BE FUDGING HAPPY!!!! I'll have part two of it up in time ^-^"

Perhaps if I get a lot of reviews I could write quicker… Ya know? xD

Deidara: Don't bribe them…

Me: But Darkness of Yami bribed me with yaoi!! GIMME THAT YOAI AND SASODEI CHOCOLATE!!! Oh yeah and THANK YOU PENDRAGON-CHAN!! Did you like your otaku self? Sorry if it wasn't all that good TT~TT

Sasori/Deidara: O_o

Me: AND THEN WE'LL DO IT DOGGIE STYLE SO WE CAN BOTH WATCH X-FILES!!!!

Alex: Are you ok?

Me: Don't think so… HEY PEOPLE!!!! I NEED IDEAS!!! I'm running low and now that SOMEONE *Glares at Alex* is in virtual school I can't talk to her about it like I used to! She also went with the band to Carnegie Hall in New York!! (Did I spell that right? Meh…)

Alex: Yosh!!

Me: So yea, give me ideas and reviews!! Please!!! T.T!!


	23. Chapter 23

Me: I am so sorry! School is a bitch,**(A/N: Yeah right and you're lazy just like me!)** and every weekend that I wanted to work on it I either felt bad or had to go to my aunts!!! I AM SO SORRY!!!! Oh also, this chapter has 'Alex Notes' which will be the usual **(A/N:)** but of course, they will be 'Alex Notes' not 'Authors Notes'. Enough of my blahhh ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

_Recap:_

_Deidara put his arm around me. He didn't say anything, but I knew he knew what was going through my mind right now. I couldn't help but smile and stare at him for a minute, the fight between Alex and the random girl tuning out. At least until I heard, "Alex, stop!" and then a scream from Ashley. I broke my stare from Deidara's face to look at the scene before me. All I could process from it was that Alex had just punched the girl in the face.**(A/N: Oh Hellz Yes!)**_

* * *

"Shit…"

I ran from Deidara's side to Alex's and looked at the bitch lying on the floor, "Alex what the crap?!" When I looked closer it appeared that Alex had just hit her in the forehead, but there was already a bruise forming.

When I looked back at Alex I saw Itachi holding her back, "No, Alex, don't injure her anymore."

But Alex wasn't listening, "Let me go! I wanna kick her ass!!"

I went up and flicked her in the forehead, "Baka, listen to Ita—Nick! If you cause too much of a scene then we'll be kicked out!!"

She stared at me and I could see the anger and slight hurt in her eyes. Alex was just as afraid of Itachi leaving her and not returning her newfound _real_ feelings as much as I was afraid of Deidara doing the same thing. Ashley's had more affect on both of us than she could ever know. Alex nodded at me nonetheless, "Ok…" She sighed and turned back to Itachi, "Sorry… I'll behave…"

Itachi nodded and let go of her, but kept an arm around her anyways—though not to keep her from hurting Ashley more, but to keep her there with him. "Ok."

I smirked, "You know Alex, if you get us kicked out now, then you'll never go to the rave and rave with anime characters."

She stared at me with a kind of lust in her eyes, "Must. Rave. With. Anime." **(A/N: Yes, because we all know that raving with anime characters is the best drug out there!!!)**

"Don't worry Itachi, she won't be doing anything." I looked back at Ashley to see that her friends were babying her now—they were sluts, too! No way! Insert sarcasm here. "You all should probably go now."

One of her friends looked over at me, "Oh yeah? And if we don't?"

I raised an eyebrow and gestured to the Akatsuki, "These aren't inflatable muscles honey, they're the real fudging **(A/N: *sweatdrops* at Abby's non-swearing)** thing."

"You'd really make us beat up those bitches?" Hidan asked.

"Well, duh!" I snapped back.

"Can I sacrifice them instead?" A sadistic smile made its way to Hidan's face.

"No, no killing!!"

Hidan did a sort of pout, "Fine…"

I looked back at the sluts. They were still glaring.

"You do know that we were being serious? He really would kill you if I let him," I said matter-of-factly.

Their eyes widened but they walked away, pretending not to be scared. Oh yeah, so believable.

We soon forgot the bitches and went back to having fun. And, I must say that the most fun that Alex and I had was when this one group came up and asked if they could get a picture of Konan and Pein _kissing_. They both stared at me and I just urged them on telling them that there were a lot of PeinKonan fans out there that would love to see you guys actually kiss.

Seeing as they had already done it once today, they figured 'what the heck?' and went ahead and kissed for the picture. Since it was for an actual picture, they had to stay like that longer than before, but I highly doubt that Konan had any problem with that and from the look in Pein's eyes—just his eyes, but still—I could tell that he didn't mind much either.

After that Alex and I decided to pull out our 'Free Hugs' sign and tape it on Hidan's back. **(A/N: Yay!)** A lot of people came up to hug him and only laughed when he started cussing them out.

Soon a few more people came up to ask for pictures, which the Akatsuki complied to strangely—some even striked a pose! Ok so it wasn't all that much of a crazy pose, but you get it. After a few more people took pictures one group of girls came up asking for yaoi kissing pictures.

Alex and I fell over laughing and the Akatsuki fell over fainting, and Konan just facepalmed at our fails, who could blame her?

Some more hours passed, we ate at the Burger King, and then lounged about until a police officer came over and told us to stop loitering on the streets. We got up and left only because we should be getting in line for the rave now.

It seemed like forever until they let us in, but they finally did and I was full of excitement. The air radiated fun and the lights and booming music only heightened my and Alex's excitement. We immediately grabbed some of the Akatsuki and ran out onto the dance floor—only Deidara, Itachi, Tobi, Hidan, and Kisame came, the rest were too 'cool' for this, so they stayed on the side doing whatever—now you'd think that Alex would be having trouble, but she was actually able to walk around with just the cast thingy on, so dancing wasn't too much of a problem.

At first the guys had no idea what to do, but after studying us and the people around them, they got the hang of it.

They were naturals.

Soon the seven of us were all dancing away in our own little group to Lady GaGa's _Bad Romance_. I'm not one to listen to this stuff though.

Oddly enough, at some point some girls had asked Hidan to dance and I noticed that one of them was Olivia. I smiled at the joy on her face, being able to dance with—what she thought was—a Hidan cosplayer. Oh if only she knew… Oh well! I also noticed that Kisame was dancing with this one girl as well. Well good, these boys need some human contact. Tobi had gone to dance like the maniac he is with this other group of Tobis. It was very hilarious I must say.

That left us with Deidara and Itachi. At some point the song switched to _Rockstar_ for reasons unknown and everyone in the room started to sing along—even me and Alex.

The place erupted in a chorus of anime nerds during the chorus then went back during the rest but right back up at the chorus again.

I couldn't help but say to Deidara, "Some of this sounds like what Hidan would do, ne?"

He smirked, "Well I would suppose."

"If you had any idea what a playboy bunny was, you'd agree."

"Then I don't think I wanna know, yeah."

"No," I smirked, "You don't."

The place erupted in hundreds of voices again. Once it was over everyone cheered and went back to dancing along to the next song. When I looked over at Alex I saw that she and Itachi were dancing rather closely and there was a full out smile on his face and—Wait… "Holy cheese!" **(A/N: Swiss?)**

Deidara looked at me oddly, "What about cheese?"

I pointed at Itachi, "He's smiling!!"

The blond looked over, "So he is, hm. That girl is amazing, I'll give her that."**(A/N: Yes! Win!)**

"Yeah really, she broke down his walls."

We all danced and had fun until the rave ended at one in the morning, piled in the car, and drove home. Good thing ninjas were used to lack of sleep…

I was knocked out before my head hit my personal pillow in the car. It seemed like only a second passed before I was being lifted bridal style from the car and taken into my room. I was set down in my bed and felt someone else get in as well but paid it no heed as I rolled against it and fell asleep again.

Surprisingly enough I woke up around 11:00 to see Deidara's sleeping face right in front of me. It was really the first time I've seen him look so peaceful; all people look peaceful in sleep, but still. He didn't look like the explosions artist of Akatsuki, or a teen influenced to do bad things by a bad organization. He looked like a normal teenage boy without a care in the world. He had his hair down and it was sprawled around his head and his bangs framed the left side of his face.

There was no expression on his face and he seemed to be so at ease. I couldn't help but wonder what he could possibly be dreaming about if he was at all and I suddenly had the urge to touch him; to see if he really was there. No human that I know of could look that at ease, even in sleep.

I reached my hand out and gently ran the tips of my fingers along his jaw line. He didn't move at all. I pushed aside his bangs to see his whole face. Still, he did not move. I ran my fingers across his cheek. No movement. Running my hand down his face I noticed the mouth on his chest—still, he gave no sign of awake…ness. **(A/N: Sooo not a word!)**My hand almost flew to it and began to trace the pattern of the mouth. Gently my fingers ran across the stitches and patterns around it before another hand caught mine.

I looked up to see Deidara smiling, eyes still closed. I was the first to speak, "Morning."

His eyes opened slightly, "Morning."

"I woke you up, didn't I?" I asked sheepishly.

His eyes opened fully, "I don't mind, hm." **(A/N: Awwwwww!)**

I smiled again, "Good." I sat up and was about to get out of bed when a pair of arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me back down. I turned to look quizzically at Deidara.

His smiled turned to a smirk, "Just because I'm awake doesn't mean I wanna get up yet."

"And if I do?"

The smile returned, "Well that's just too bad, yeah." We layed there for a while longer—I realized that Sasori must not have been in here—until Kisame came barging through the door, "What the crap, un??" Deidara sat up and stared at Kisame.

Jaws smirked, "We knew you both were awake and were getting worried, so Alex sent me in to make sure nothing was happening." **(A/N: Totally something I would ruin!)**

"Well as you can see, nothing is, so leave, un!" Deidara fell back on the bed and put the pillow over his head.

I sat up and stared at Kisame, "You just wanted to piss him off."

"That and Alex was worried," Kisame moved aside to show Alex smiling her little head off.

"Of course she was," I laid back down and stole the pillow back from Deidara, "Just go away and let us sleep!!"

"You weren't sleeping before," Alex said.

I threw the pillow at her with complaints of "Now what'll I use as a pillow?" from Deidara.

"Oh just go without one," I rolled over on my tummy and tried to go back to sleep, "Leave you two!!!"

"Aww, but we don't want to!" Alex whined mischievously.

I twitched, "I swear I feel like your mother right now… Hell, I feel like Deidara and I are your parents right now!"

Deidara raised his head to stare at me, "Where the hell did you get that from, un?"

I picked up my head to look at him, "Well we're sleeping in the same bed with immature people telling us to wake up already and whining at us."

He nodded, "Ah, I see."

"Now that you all understand," Kisame walked over to the side of the bed, "Time to get up!" He pulled the sheets off and I was hit with a rush of cold air.

I clung to Deidara for warmth and looked up right as the flash of the camera went off. I stared at Alex in disbelief, "You didn't."

She turned off the camera and smirked, "Oh, but I did."

I glared, "Ok, you've got your blackmail, now get out!!!"

Alex looked at Kisame, "They aren't cooperating."

Kisame smirked, "Yes!" Before we knew what happened, Kisame pulled on both our legs and pulled us both out of the bed and landed on the floor with an echoing _thud_. I pushed myself up off the ground to stare at them.

Deidara was rubbing his head and glaring, "What the hell is wrong with you two?!"

"Many things," I glared at Alex who was just smiling her little head off.

After that we all went out and started watching T.V while Alex went on the computer—she was snickering evilly.

I slowly turned to look at her, "Alex?"

"Yes?" She chuckled.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing… Ok, wait for it," She clicked a button, "I sent that picture of you and Deidara to Mason on Facebook." **(A/N: Ok, just saying that was totally my idea!)**

"YOU WHAHT?!" I stood up and stared wide-eyed at her.

"Nice," Deidara went up and high-fived her.

I glared at both of them, "I really hate you both right now."

I was promptly glomped by the two of them, "Love you too!"

Twitching I looked over at Itachi, "Can't you control her?"

He looked up from the book he was reading—where is he finding all these things??? "Even I have no control over her."

Alex then laughed maniacally.

After a while Alex and I attempted to watch Vampire Knight, but failed epically with the Akatsuki commenting little things. It was pretty much the same as when we tried to watch Ouran High School Host Club. We failed… Like I said…

"Ok screw this!" Alex jumped up from her computer chair, "I am not going to watch this with all of them commenting on every little thing!

I had to agree with her, "Well then what do you want to do?"

A sick, malicious, evil smile crept its way to Alex's mouth, "I've been thinking about it for a while now."

"I don't think I want to know," I inched away slowly, "QUICK! RUN BEFORE SHE KILLS US ALL!!"

I began to run but Alex caught me and I fell flat on my face. She only laughed at me, "Oh it's not that bad!"

I pulled up my face, "Then what the hell is it?!"

There was a long dramatic silence before she uttered the two evil words, "Strip Poker."

My face went white, "No."

"Yes."

"NO!"

"YES!!" She grabbed me before I could move and dragged me out to the Florida room where the long table was—it would probably fit all of us, or at least the ones that were going to play.

"I really hate you," I was seated by her with a pout.

"Well I don't rightly care," She went back into the house, "ITACHI, DEIDARA, KISAME, HIDAN, SASORI! GET YOUR ASSES OUT TO THE FLORIDA ROOM RIGHT NOW!!!"

"What is the point of this?" I rested my elbows on the table.

Alex got out a deck of cards and sat down next to me, "Well we're bored, right? So here's something to do!"

"Still! _Strip_ Poker?!"

"You know you want to see them shirtless."

"Yeah, but I don't want them to see me like that!"

"Well I think Deidara does."

My face started burning, "I could probably say the same for Itachi."

Alex just smiled, "I know."

My head fell on the table, "Why can't you blush like a normal person?"

"Because she's not fucking normal," Hidan came through the sliding glass door followed by the others that were called, "What the hell do you want, Alexis?" **(A/N: See Hidan gets it!)**

Alex motioned for them to sit down and then started shuffling cards, "Why, I just wanted us to play a little game!"

"And if we don't know it? Sasori asked in a bored tone.

Alex waved her hand as if to dismiss the fact, "We can teach you, it's not hard."

"You don't even know how to play." I stared at her.

"Correction, Abby will teach us." Alex beamed.

"Well what are we playing?" Kisame asked.

Alex smirked, "Poker, but a special kind."

"Poker? You all play that here?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah," Alex said, "You all know how to play?"

"It depends on which one you're talking about," Itachi said, "But we know how to play a few versions."

Alex glared at me, "You never said that there was more than one way to play!"

I raised an eyebrow, "Well of course there is. There's Five Card Stud, Texas Holdem, Baseball, High Card Low Card, Tripoli, and a lot others that I don't know."

"How do you know all those?!" Alex almost screamed.

"My aunt likes card games; I could probably teach you five card games from her… Thank the lord we aren't playing Squeak! Though I'd probably win at that…" I pondered. Squeak was a game that my family had made up; it was pretty much multiplayer solitaire.

"Hell no!" Alex shook her head, "I am not trying to play that again!!" I had tried to teach her and my friends how to play once… It didn't work. **(A/N: No, and it gave me migraines for a week!!!!)**

"Fine," I pouted.

"What did you mean by 'special' poker, Alexis?" Kisame asked.

"You just had to bring it up, Kisame," I glared at him.

"Don't glare at my partner in crime!" Alex whacked my arm, "Now then! What I meant was… Drum roll please!!" No drums were played, "Fine party poopers! Strip Poker!!!"

There were different expressions now, Hidan was smirking the most perverted smirk ever, Kisame was laughing loudly, Sasori seemed to perk up a bit, Itachi seemed to smile a tad, Deidara was smirking as well, and Alex was smiling innocently. I was banging my head on the table since it seemed like no one was opposed to the idea. Damn.

"So," Hidan smirked, "Shall we get started?"

Alex smirked along with him and pulled out a deck of cards and some poker chips, "Yup." She passed out the poker chips to everyone.

"What should we play first?" Kisame asked.

"The only one I know!" Alex waved the cards around, "Five Card Stud!"

I sighed, "At least it's not High Card, Low Card. That'd just make us lose clothing faster…"

Hidan raised his hand, "I vote we play that."

Sasori rolled his eyes, "Idiot."

"Just shut up and antie up! " Alex snapped and we all did so before she delt us our cards.

I officially hated her.

I have a seven and queen of spaids, two of diamonds, and a four and ace of clubs. When my turn came, I gave up the two, seven, and four, but I did get back two ace and a random eight. Ok, three of a kind, I can get by on that. Maybe… I tried looking to my right to see what Sasori had, but he kept his cards hidden well. To my left I tried to peek at Deidara's, but he caught me and turned them away, smirking.

Damn.

When I looked up I saw that Itachi was helping Alex with her hand. Apparently she had something good since he didn't tell her to fold.

We all bet or folded—Kisame, Hidan, and Itachi did—and Alex called Sasori. He had two pair, but it was only a jack and queen so I was good for now. Alex showed hers and she had two pair as well, which was two kings and two tens; I was winning so far.

With a smug smile I laid down my cards, "So sorry, Alex."

Alex glared at me and Sasori sighed, but Deidara laid down his cards then: three fives and two threes, a full house, "Read 'em and weep." He turned his smug grin at me and I just glared back.

Thankfully before this Alex and I had put on some clothes and we each had on jacket, which we took off; Sasori pulled off his shirt, though, and it didn't seem like he rightly minded.

After half an hour of playing Alex and I were in nothing but our shirts and underwear… It was kind of awkward for both of us sitting in between two guys, whereas all of the guys were either in shorts or just plain underwear… Alex and I really didn't want Hidan or Kisame to lose this next round!

Everyone had folded this round besides Alex and Hidan, who had just called Alex. She seemed pretty confident in her hand, and I don't blame her since she put down a flush. She seemed to be very please with herself, at least until Hidan laid down his straight flush…

Alex glared at Hidan after her face turned totally white, "I hate your guts!!!". **(A/N: Why Abby Why!?!)**

Hidan just shrugged, "Doesn't matter; you wanted to play this game, so follow through."

Alex seemed to look to Itachi for help but I could tell that he wasn't going to do anything about it. Uchiha Itachi is a pervert after all!!!

Back to the situation at hand, Alex hesitantly reached for the hem of her shirt and I began drawing designs in the table with my finger. She doesn't need _every single person_ at the table staring, now does she?? Plus, that would be awkward… Insert twitch here.

When I heard the thump of her shirt hit the floor I looked up to see her glaring at Hidan with all her might… And him and Itachi staring at her very intensely.

"I am so sorry Alex…but you _are_ the one who wanted to play…" I winced as Alex threw the cards at me.

"Just shut up and shuffle!"

Right as I began to, however, Tobi came running outside, "Alexis-chan has a message on the magical machine that has all the dirty pictures of us!!"

Alex raised an eyebrow and looked at Itachi who replied monotonously, "The computer."

Her eyes widened, "I never logged out of facebook!!" She ran inside and we could hear her laughter from out here, "Abby, you have to see this!!! Mason replied!"

Deidara and I looked at each other and grinned evilly before running inside to see the message:

_Message Reply:_

_Ha ha, Alex, real funny -.-_

Deidara tilted his head to the side a bit, "What's so funny about that?"

"It's the fact that he saw the picture! He's probably pissed beyond all reason!" Alex started laughing again.

"Ano, Alexis-san?" Konan came up to Alex who turned to look at her, "Where are your clothes?"

Alex looked down at herself to see that she was still half naked, screamed, ran into her room, and came out in clothing, "Ok, that's better."

Kisame poked his head in from outside, "So I'm guessing that the game is over now?"

Hidan pushed past Kisame to walk into the living room, "Well that's bull shit."

I rolled my eyes, "Live with it pervert."

"Uh, Abby?"

"Yeah, what is it, Deidara?" I turned to look at him.

"You still need pants." He laughed at me.

I sweatdropped as Alex spoke, "You would be the one to notice that."

Deidara shrugged, "Itachi was probably going to tell you to put on some clothes at some point, too."

"Yeah but he didn't, Konan did!" Alex pointed at Konan.

"Well I don't care who tells who to put on clothes, I'm taking that advice right now," I went into my room and put on some pants and came out just as the phone started to ring. I ran over to it and silenced the occupants of the living room as I answered, "Hello?"

"Hey, Abby! It's your aunt!"

I felt the smile break over my face, "Hey Aunt Sue! Why are you calling here? You know my mom is on a cruise, right?"

"Mhmm, but I wanted to call to talk to you about something."

"Oh?" I had no clue where this was going, but I just felt like I wasn't going to like it.

"Yes, I wanted to know, since your parents have been gone so long, if you wanted to come and stay with me for a weekend!"

I bit my lip, "W-Well I don't think I could," I looked to all of the Akatsuki, "I got a lot of cats recently and they really are a handful. I'm not sure what they would do if I left them alone for two days straight."

"Oh, but you leave them at home when you're at school all the time, right?"

"Yeah, but that's not the same as leaving them for forty-eight hours, Aunt Sue." I really did want to go to her house, but I couldn't leave the Akatsuki here; they'd probably kill everyone by the time I got back, "Plus I have Alex over right now."

"Well, bring her on over here! You know I wouldn't mind!" She said happily, oblivious to the fact that I had a bunch of criminals listening in on my conversation. "And couldn't you just get some neighbors to look after your cats?"

I shook my head, I couldn't have my neighbors take care of them! Something would go wrong… I don't know what, but something would!!! They'd either kill the poor neighbor or the secret would be out, and no one besides me, Alex, Chris, and Mason know.

"Hey Abby?" Alex called.

"One second Aunt Sue," I put the phone down, "Yeah, Alex?"

"Don't Tyler and Jimmy know about them? They could take care of them while we're gone!" Alex grinned.

I thought about it, and that actually could work out well. I put the phone back to my ear, "Ok, I think we could make it this coming weekend!"

"Wonderful! I'll drive down there and pick you both up on Friday!"

"Ok, I'll see you then. Love you, bye!"

"Love you, too, bye!"

We hung up and I called Jimmy and Tyler; they could both watch over the Akatsuki this weekend. It would be nice to see someone from my family. I was really starting to miss my parents and both Alex and I needed a break from the Akatsuki, but only for a little while. We could never leave our little criminals for too long! **(A/N: Awwwww but I dun wanna leave!!!!!)**

* * *

Me: TA FUCKING DA!!!

Deidara: Someone's irritable

Me: I AM NOT! I just hate that I haven't updated in forever!!! Oh, also people! Me and my friend are starting a collaboration story!! It's pretty much about two cousins that move and go to a new school. My character starts to like Deidara and hers starts liking Gaara—she loves Gaara—so if anyone would like to help in FINDING A TITLE then please do PM me! And I mean JUST the title! Thanks!

Alex: is not listening cuz she's not in this one -_- *Runs off to cause mayhem with Kisame*

Oh and REVIEW!!! Let's see how high we can get this time!!!


	24. Chapter 24

Me: Ok, well, right after I posted the last chapter Alex came over and we discussed this chapter! It shall be very fun! I hope you all enjoy it!

Hidan: Why weren't we in your last A/N?

Me: Because I didn't want to bother them with that! They need Kitty Kurse I say!

Deidara: They don't _need_ it…

Me: I beg to differ… Anyhoo, this chapter will also have Alex notes! HAVE FUN! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!

* * *

_Recap:_

_We hung up and I called Jimmy and Tyler; they could both watch over the Akatsuki this weekend. It would be nice to see someone from my family. I was really starting to miss my parents and both Alex and I needed a break from the Akatsuki, but only for a little while. We could never leave our little criminals for too long! **(A/N: Awwwww but I dun wanna leave!)**_

* * *

The rest of that Sunday was spent doing laundry… Though this time Deidara helped me, which was great until we got to the colors and he pulled one of my bras out of the washing machine to put into the dryer. My face flushed red and he smirked as I grabbed it away from him and threw it into the dryer.

"Pervert," I muttered under my breath.

He elbowed me in the side playfully, "Don't put me in the same boat as Hidan, hm."

"Oh, yeah, my bad," I pulled out the last of the clothes and put them in the dryer.

After that we all hung out in the living room and Alex and I put in Finding Nemo. What? We love that movie!** (A/N: Hellz yes go nemo!)**

"I can speak whale!" Alex yelled and everyone stared at her—that part hadn't come up yet, nor had the movie even started, "MOOOWHAAAAH OHHHWAAH OOOOH!"

I just rolled my eyes as the Akatsuki stared at her like she was the insane person that she is deep down. **(A/N: Deep Down?)**

…Ok it's not that deep down at all. **(A/N: oh.)**

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Kakuzu asked.

"It's in the movie!" Alex pointed at the T.V.

"Ok, then let me re-phrase my question: what the fuck is wrong with this world?"

"Didn't you ask that after we went to the beach or something?" Kisame interjected.

Kakuzu shrugged, "I don't know! But I still want to know!"

Disregarding the 'conversation' that they were all having I walked over to the computer and logged on to fanfiction. I had a message reply from one of my friends on there: Darkness Of Yami. We had been talking about videos on YouTube that had the voice actors of Naruto and such. There was one that I had found that had Itachi saying a special message for his fangirls. Alex came up behind me to see what I was giggling about.

_Message Reply:_

_OMGJ I WATCHED IT!  
THAT MADE ME LAUGH HYSTERICALLY!  
...Itachi's philosophy life is: "You're all my bitches."_

"I would totally be Itachi's bitch!," Alex yelled as the movie began.

Every single head turned to face Alex at the same time with the same expression of 'What The Fuck' on each face, even Pein's.

"What in the fucking hell did you just say?" Hidan asked.

Alex turned around, "What?" like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

I facepalmed, "You just said that you'd be Itachi's bitch. Out. Loud."

Alex looked over to Itachi—who had a face mixed with surprise, amusement, and certain smugness that I can't really describe, "Oops?" She shrugged, "Well whatever!" With that she went back to watching the movie and, again, quoting things.

One by one the rest went back to a sense of normality as we watched Nemo get taken away by the divers.

"I'll bet you could relate to this movie, Kisame," Deidara laughed at him.

"Kisame is a good fishy!" Tobi threw his arms in the air and laughed a very Tobi laugh.

Kisame twitched, "Shut up, both of you!" An evil aura flowed around him.

Tobi cowered in the corner of the room, but Deidara was too 'cool' for that so, he just settled for inching away from the blue shinobi and shutting up.

For once Alex and I went to bed early while we left some of the Akatsuki out in the living room to do whatever it is that Akatsuki do at night when we wouldn't be around, which by the sound of things wasn't much. I was asleep within minutes.

The next morning I woke up to my alarm playing _Bad Romance_. I sat up and glared at the alarm, "It's too early for Lady Gaga dammit!"

"It's also too early for you to be yelling at inanimate objects, hm," a voice came from beside me.

"I can yell at my alarm clock at three in the morning if I want to, Deidara." I glared at the sleeping lump next to me.

One of his eyes peeked out from under his shield of blond hair, "I highly doubt that you'd get up at three in the morning just to yell at a clock."

"You'd be surprised what she'd do," Alex walked through my door, "Why are they playing Lady Gaga so early in the damn morning?"

"That's exactly what I said!" I huffed as _Tik Tok_ came on, "Why are all these songs on so early?"

I don't think Alex heard me, however, since she was now singing along to the song, "Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer, Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here, And now, the, dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger, But we kick em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger, I'm talking about everybody getting crunk, crunk, Boys tryin' to touch my junk, junk ,Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk. Now, now, we go until they kick us out, out, Or the, police shut us down, down, Police shut us down, down, Po-po shut us—"

"What in the fucking hell is going on?" Hidan walked in looking like he just woke up—which he probably did, "Who's dying?"

Alex's face went to chibi-tears, "I was singing!"

"Ok then word of advice," Hidan glared, "Don't sing. Ever."

Alex glared back, "I'll sing if I want to! WHEN YOU SEE MY FACE HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL, WHEN YOU WALK MY WAY HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL, WHEN YOU FIND A MAN THAT'S WORTH A DAMN AND TREATS YOU WELL, THEN HE'S A FOOL YOU'RE JUST AS WELL HOPE IT GIVES YOU—"

Hidan put his hand over her mouth, "Shut. Up." She nodded and he removed his hand. **(A/N: Just sayin I prolly would have licked his hand and kept singing.)**

"Well at least it wasn't Deidara's hand," Alex smirked at me and skipped out of the room.

I glared at the door that she just left through, "She is so lucky that murder is illegal."

Hidan shook his head, "I don't even want to know what she meant by that." He left the room to go get something to eat most likely.

Once Alex and I got to school we headed for the library to talk with Tyler and Jimmy about this weekend. They were going to need to know some things that I wasn't able to talk about over the phone yesterday. We found them sitting with Sam and Eric in the back and headed there.

"Hey guys!" Alex waved as we walked over.

Tyler looked up, "ALEX-CHAN!" He ran over and they glomped each other. Yeah, don't ask me, I don't know either.

I rolled my eyes and sat down next to Sam, "Hey Abby."

I smiled, "Hey!" Alex and Tyler came over and sat down.

"So, what exactly do we need to know about your 'cats'?" Jimmy put air quotes around 'cats'.

"Why do they need to know about your cats, Abby?" Eric asked.

"Alex and I are going to my aunt's this weekend so, they need to watch them." I shrugged.

"They can't live without anyone for two days…?"

I shook my head, "Not these cats…"

Sam was about to ask something but Alex waved it off, "Trust me, you don't want to know!" We didn't think Sam wanted to hear about the Akatsuki in my house… She never really liked anime and would think we were insane, most likely. Though, I would like to see what Eric would do if we told him. He'd probably think _something_ perverted and then Alex and I would hit him with my dictionary. **(A/N: OF DOOM!1)**

"Anyways," Alex continued, "We'll make sure that they don't cause any trouble, but if they do start to not listen just call one of our cells and…put one of them on, ok?"

Sam and Eric looked at me very oddly but I didn't pay it any heed, "We'll straighten it out then." **(A/N: Didn't pay it any head? Bwahahahahahaha that's what she said.)**

The day dragged on so slowly for some reason—probably because the exciting weekend now morphed into a boring school day—and I will tell you now: biology didn't help that at all. We were taking notes on mollusks… Not fun. I sighed and pulled out my phone—yay for sitting in the back of the class!—and went to Google to look up anime pictures. After a while I got a little bored of the plain Akatsuki pictures and got an idea. I typed 'Itachi' into the search box and looked for a while until I found the perfect picture—he was pretty much nude, but what needed to be covered was—and I must say, it was pretty nosebleed educing. I was laughing almost hysterically as I sent the picture.

After a few seconds an ear-splitting scream tore through the air from the completely _opposite_ side of the school.

_I knew she could yell, but, REALLY?_

**She is good! Maybe she could be an opera star!**

_Hush you!_

Even though her yell surprised me I couldn't help but burst out laughing. I fell out of my chair and the class stared at me before the teacher yelled at me to get back into my seat.

Alex was grumbling as she caught up with me to walk home—she could walk on the leg now since she's been having sessions with Konan, but still had to have the cast, "Damn teacher. Perfectly normal to scream like that."

"Normal for who?" I interjected.

She glared at me, "Ok, so it's normal for me, but still!" She huffed, "Detention? Really?"

"When do you have it?"

"Just tomorrow."

I sweat dropped, "You're complaining about one day of detention? I would think you'd get at least three or Time-Out for that."

"Yeah, well, our school sucks. I mean, they _did_ let a bunch of drunkards run around the school expecting the students to get rid of them."

"Oh yeah, that's true."

"What's true?" Deidara appeared in front of me and Itachi poofed behind Alex.

Alex turned and hugged him, "It's true that our school is full of idiots for teachers."

"And students," I pointed out and jumped on Deidara's back, "Oh yeah, Alex?"

She looked up from her spot on Itachi as we took off, "Yeah?"

"You didn't delete the picture, did you?"

She smirked, "Now why the hell would I waste a perfectly good picture like that?"

"What picture?" Itachi asked calmly, but there was curiosity in his eyes.

"Nothing," Alex said sweetly.

Itachi turned to me and I sighed, "I sent her a sexy picture someone drew of you in class today."

Alex glared at me, "It's not like you have to _tell_ him!"

"Oh, right, since you're going to see it for real at some point in your life?"

"Well there is now a good possibility since he's, oh, I don't know, REAL!"

Deidara turned towards Itachi, "Do you know what they're saying?"

Itachi shook his head, "I usually do not."

"And that's bad because…?" Alex questioned.

The next day at school neither Alex nor I sent the other any awesome pictures, but we did break out into random song during lunch—we spent lunch in the library sometimes, so we started to sing "Butterfly" during that. The mean librarian didn't really like that, but we didn't really care.

Once I got home I did my homework and forced Alex to do hers when she got home from detention—with some help from Itachi and Kisame—then got onto the computer. I had a message from the one friend that sent me the message talking about everyone being Itachi's bitch—Darkness Of Yami. I opened it and it had a link in it with the words, "This picture is epic! I loved it so much! *-*."

"It would be like her to send me an awesome picture…" I mumbled to myself.

"Who, un?" Deidara came up behind me.

I turned to look at him, "Just a friend on here; she sent me a picture that I'm going to check out." Deidara sat on the couch next to the computer as I put the link into the browser, removed the spaces—damn you fanfiction—and hit the enter button.

A picture of Deidara came up: he was in some body of water, completely nude, but the water covered what needed covering. It was still a very, very hot picture, though. The first thing that happened was me going scarlet when I looked over to Deidara to see that he was smirking at the screen then turned towards me and smirked more. The second thing was my huge-ass nosebleed that always follows looking at a hot picture of an anime guy. I stood up and ran to the bathroom.

I was trying to stop the blood flow when Deidara came in and leaned against the doorframe, "Do you and your friends really exchange pictures like that, yeah?"

I glared at him from my position over the sink, "Sometimes the pictures are actually decent! How do you expect me to know something like that will pop up?"

"Sometimes?" He smirked, "Then you and Alex really do look at that stuff." **(A/N: Hellz Yeah!)**

I smirked back, "Don't flatter yourself, you all are always covered up." The blood was already starting to stop.

"That actually makes me feel a bit bett—" He was cut off as a loud 'poof' sound came from the living room. I gave him a look and he rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I'll go see who the unlucky victim is."

I cleaned the blood from my nose and walked out to see Alex run over and flick on a switch, laughing insanely. Raising an eyebrow I followed her to the living room only to see Tobi-Cat on one of the panels of the fan…while it was on. Kisame and Alex were pointing and laughing their asses off. "ALEX, WHAT THE CHEESE?" **(A/N: Swiss?)**

Itachi poofed into the room next to me, "What did Alex do?"

I turned to him and pointed at Alex, "PUNISH IT!"

Alex smirked, "He can punish me anytime."

Kisame was the first one to speak after a long awkward silence, "But you two sleep in the same room as me!"

I put a hand on Kisame's shoulder—I had to reach up to, though, he's tall! "It's ok; we won't let them scar your brain."

"Geez, now I feel like Itachi and I are the parents, not you and Deidara," Alex complained.

"Oh please," Hidan entered the conversation, "You are so not mature enough to be a damn parent!"

Alex paused for a minute, "Yeah, I guess you're right! Yay, no responsibility for me!"

I twitched, "Don't make me kill you."

"Can I help?" Hidan smirked, "Jashin hasn't had a sacrifice in a long time."

"No killing!" Luckily for us Hidan obliged and we had a murder free night, except when Alex and I watched the new episode of NCIS. **(A/N: Ok, this is the actual author, and can anyone tell me what exactly happened in the recent NCISs? I haven't watched in forever and my dad was saying something about Abby had evidence proving that Gibbs killed that one guy that killed his wife and daughter! *Insert MAJOR sad face*) (A/N: You fail you know that? K anyway what I was gonna say is that I totally thought of that last scene while I was at her house looking up at a fan. Yay for me!)**

The next day, a Wednesday, nothing much happened actually. Surprising, huh? I mean, so much stuff usually happens on Wednesdays! Oh well, that's fine with me; I've had enough stuff happen this week to keep me entertained.

…

…

…

…

Yeah, if only it really was the end of surprises for the week.

Thursday Alex and I were walking to our meeting place with Deidara and Itachi to take us home when Alex's head suddenly turned to the side—I'm surprised she didn't get whiplash.

"Alex?" I asked, "What is it now?"

"I see shiny," She ran away from me between these two buildings to follow the 'shiny'.

I groaned and followed, "Perfect parental training: have an Alex for a week." **(A/N: HA! Hey wait a second...!)**

"I hear that!" Alex called from her place ahead of me, still chasing the shiny.

Staring after her I mumbled to myself, "How in the hell did she hear that?"

"It's because I'm more awesomer than you!"

"That wasn't even proper grammar!"

She turned back towards me from her chase with one of the straightest faces ever, "What in the flying fuck made you think I care about grammar?"

I paused, "This is very true." Because of our conversation I didn't realize that we'd wandered into a very dark-alley-type-place. I looked around warily, "Hey, Alex?"

"Yeah?" She asked.

"Where are we?"

She looked around—doing a full spin—before turning back to me and shrugging, "Dunno, but we should probably get back before the guys think we died."

"Well then they'll probably just have to worry a bit more." Alex and I whipped around to look at the end opposite the one we came through to see a man standing there, smirking kind of… Evilly. And I mean Orochimaru-is-coming-to-rape-you evil!

…I still want to know if he really did ever rape Sasuke… Oops, off track. The bad guy, right!

"Who're you?" Alex asked bluntly.

"I don't think that's much of your concern," The man said. He had a full head of hair and a clean shave, showing no sign of any wrinkles—I'd say he was about 25-30 or so—and was wearing black jean pants with a grey shirt and black leather jacket—no wonder Alex and I didn't see him lurking in the shadows. Oh, jeez, I just used the word 'lurking' didn't I? That's usually only used for creepers…

I grabbed Alex's arm and started walking the way we had come, "Come on let's just leave. Don't look back, just keep walking. If we can get out of here the guys can find us."

Alex was about to say something when a shadow fell over us from the end of the alley, "Oh, you two are no fun at all." We both looked up to see a man about the same age as the other wearing a Hollister shirt and pants—I knew they were new, the smell coming from them almost made me choke.

"Whoa, who brought the gas chambers out of the mall?" Alex pretended to gag.

I elbowed her in the side, "Shush! Jeez haven't you learned anything from learning taijutsu? Don't patronize the random creeper that looks like he's gonna kill you!"

"But Naruto does it all the time!" Alex whined.

"Yeah well you don't have a tailed beast in your stomach, nor do you have the Akatsuki after you; just Itachi."

"Shut up, both of you," We turned from our conversation to see the man in front of us had pulled out a gun and was aiming it at us, "Just get back in there," He gestured to the alley.

As we walked backwards Alex leaned in and whispered, "Abby, I really feel like we've been captured by Orochimaru!"

"Yeah, I would too if Orochimaru liked little girls, but he likes boys and you know that!" I whispered back. **(A/N: this sooo not a time for jokes... even true ones! lol)**

"I thought I told you two to shut up," the guy—behind us now—ushered us forward, "And if you do talk you might as well talk about something that's not so freakish…"

"I take pride in my weirdness, thank you very much!" Alex yelled at him.

"Alex, Shut Up!" I stared at the gun, "Of course you're weird! You're mouthing off to a guy with a gun to you, baka!"

Alex flinched but nodded, "Right…" then whispered more quietly to me, "The guys should notice that we aren't there soon, right? They'll be here soon…right?"

I shrugged then turned to the guy with the gun, "Wh-What exactly do you want from us?"

The guy in front of us grinned, "You mean you don't know who we are?"

Alex shook her head, "Do you think we'd be asking who you were if we knew who you were?"

I flicked her in the head, "Shush, baka!"

The man in front of us didn't seem to acknowledge Alex's remark, "We've been all over the news in this area."

"Two convicts escaped from Georgia," The guy behind us laughed and the one in front of us joined him.

"Oh yeah!" Alex said, "They said they were put away for murder and that they slowly went insane in their, what, five years in prison?"

I stared at her, "Since when do you watch the damn news?"

"Since that's what Itachi does in the evenings and I'm usually with him or you then," She shrugged.

"That man is something else if he can make you watch the news." Then it hit me, "Wait… MURDER?" I turned to face the two guys again and they had stopped laughing and were glaring at us.

"We don't really like to be called insane," The one behind us said, "It's quite rude of you to say that."

"We don't think of us as insane; just as having an obsession." The guy in front of us shrugged. **(A/N: I feel the same way!)**

"An obsession with murder?" Alex queried then turned to me, "What do you know, we aren't that insane!"

I couldn't believe how nonchalant Alex was being right now, "Hello! Alex! They're obsessed with murder and have a gun to our heads!" I facepalmed, "They're gonna kill us!"

"What you think I don't know that?" She shook her head, "The guys should pop in any minute… I mean…you know who they are…it'd only be natural…"

"Sorry to disappoint you," the one in front said—let's just call him guy 1, "But, we won't kill you here, that'd be way too messy; if they found the bodies, they might find us as well."

Alex's eyes seemed to finally cloud with the worry that was settling in my chest, "But… Then…"

"Alex," I asked, "D-Do you think you'd be able to use your taijutsu with your leg like that…?"

She shook her head, "Even if I could, I haven't been practicing because of it. Itachi didn't want me to hurt myself so…"

"Damn it all…"

"Come on," Guy 1 said and guy 2 pushes us forward.

"But," Alex said quietly so only I could hear, "I can still run like hell." I was about to reply when I felt something—chakra signatures were close by, "You felt that, Abby?"

I nodded, "We have to make a run for it." She nodded, "Ok, one… two… th—" Alex was already running the opposite way we had come before I could even say 'three', "Alex!" I ran after her right by guy 2.

Though, I didn't get far before I heard the loud bang from the gun and the sharp shooting pain in my leg. I let out a shrill scream as I fell over my feet onto the ground with my eyes tightly closed as tears of pain leaked out my eyes and grabbed my leg. Can you blame me for being in a lot of pain when I've never even broken a bone or had anything deeper than a flesh wound? No, I didn't think so. **(A/N: oh noes! D:)**

I felt Alex running back towards me, but I didn't hear the men running towards us, "Abby!" Alex knelt down beside me. I felt a rush of wind and the sound of feet hitting the ground and Alex took in an excited breath, "Itachi!" Opening my eyes I saw Itachi kneeling down next to Alex—she was right, the guys really did come to save the damsels in distress when that guy is in an anime.

Funny, I always hated it when the girl had to be saved by the star anime guy. Oh well I suppose.

"Which one did that?" I turned my head to see someone standing in front of me. I looked up to see the wall of blond hair and hands clenched into fists. "Well?" He turned his face halfway to look at me out of the corner of his eye, "Which one?"

Alex pointed to the poor bastard, "That one."

"Ha, what's a skinny little kid like you gonna do?" Guy 2 laughed and guy 1 finally pulled out his own gun.

I could a pissed aura coming off of Deidara in waves as well as Itachi, of course he masked it better, "Deidara."

He turned around, "What?"

"…Do not make too much of a scene; Leader-sama would not like for us to be on the news."

Deidara smirked and turned back, "Don't worry, there won't be a scrape of them left once I turn them into art." If Deidara hadn't turned around, we would have seen the amusement in his eyes for being able to show off his art again in this world.

"Come on," Itachi helped up Alex and picked me up bridal style, causing a sharp stab of pain to go through my leg as we walked away from the alleyway. Not one minute after we were out of range did a very large explosion go off and Deidara joined back up with us.

Itachi handed me off to Deidara and Alex hopped on Itachi's back and we ran from the scene—like we were never there in the first place.

My leg was killing me the whole way home as it bled out all over everything… Ok so maybe it wasn't that bad, but I can pretend to be ninja! But, it was bleeding pretty badly—I'd never be able to wear these pants again…

It was silent the whole way home and once we did get back Deidara carried me into my room as Itachi barked orders at Kisame to get a towel or two to put under me to I wouldn't get any blood on my bed and to get Konan. Once Kisame got the towels Deidara laid me down and Konan came in.

"Ok, everybody out. I don't want to work with you all crowding me." Konan knelt by my bed on my left to get a better view of my leg.

Deidara was about to walk out when I very ninja-ly grabbed his hand, "Hey, if Itachi was with Alex when Konan was operating on her, then you have to be with me buddy!" I smiled through my pain.

He rolled his eyes, "Of course," and knelt on the right side of my bed.

Konan had gathered together a bunch of stuff very quickly and was already ripping a hole in my pants where the wound was—like I said, I'd never be able to wear these babies again. They must feel so sad…

The first thing she did was get the bullet out; I was surprised it wasn't as deep as I had thought, but I guess he must have shot at some angle that made it not go in deeply… Or maybe guy 1 actually did it, not sure. Oh well! Point is, this was hurting like a pregnant bitch… Now that would be pain!

I gritted my teeth and squeezed Deidara's hand more, "Damn Alex and her shiny!"

Deidara looked at me like I was insane, "Her what?"

I shook my head, "I'll tell you later."

Finally, Konan got out the bullet and started to clean the wound and put a chakra covered hand over it and began to heal it before putting on bandages, "I swear if I wasn't here you and Alex would probably be neck-high in hospital bills."

"Good thing we have our own personal medic-nin." I sighed.

She nodded, "You should probably change clothes; you look like a wreck with those pants."

"Gee, that's just what I wanted to hear today," I smiled and rolled my eyes.

"You'll need some help, though. I wouldn't recommend you walking on that leg at least until your aunt comes for you tomorrow, and even then, don't walk around too much."

I waved it off, "Just toss me some PJ bottoms; I'm a master in the art of lazy so I can easily get changed laying down."

"Wouldn't that just make it more difficult, yeah?" Deidara asked.

"I don't know, why?"

"Because not only is he a brat, but he's also a pervert," Sasori walked in and smirked.

Deidara glared, "Danna…"

"What are you doing in here?" Konan asked.

"I didn't hear anymore screaming so I figured it was ok to come in." Sasori said.

I hung my head, "Well isn't that pleasant to hear?"

Later on that night I finally got on some pants—by myself thank you very much, I didn't need any help from a certain bomber… Then later on while I was channel surfing in my room with Deidara I stumbled across the news. Just guess what the lead story was.

"_Investigators believe that the recent explosion is of the same type as the one from a few weeks ago—there are no devices what so ever, only pieces of charred…clay throughout the crime scene."_

"Looks like you've caused quite the uproar, Deidara." I commented.

He smirked, "Like I mind that, hm."

I smiled and leaned against him, "No, I suppose someone like you wouldn't mind attention…"

He poked me in the side, "What's that supposed to mean?"

I laughed, "Just that someone who loves explosions shouldn't mind attention. It'd be ironic if you really were shy, and we all know that you are the farthest thing from shy."

"And that's a bad thing?" Deidara teased.

"No, not really…" A thought occurred to me then, "Shit, how will I be able to go to school tomorrow with this injury? Konan said I shouldn't walk on it!"

"You could always stay home, right?"

I thought about it, "I haven't had a day off in a while… That'd be kinda fun I suppose. I wouldn't be able to do much though… But that is what a day off is supposed to be…"

"So you're going to stay home, un?" I could hear the hope and smile in his voice.

I nodded, "Yup! Oh, that means I can stay up and watch Family Guy tonight!"

"Works for me."

So, that's what we did. Deidara, Sasori, and I stayed up and watched Family Guy and I used Deidara as a pillow again. The next morning I told Alex I wouldn't be going—Konan agreed—and Itachi had to get her to go to school. The funny thing is, Alex felt left out so we taught Itachi how to use my phone to text, so him and Alex were texting nonstop all day—though I didn't get to see anything that they talked about since Itachi was way too ninja for me to even get near my phone and at the end of the day, they had both deleted their messages from both phones.

I really want to know what they were talking about… **(A/N: Muhhahahahahahaha!)**

As for me, all day I sat in my bed watching stuff and getting on my laptop and reading fanfics when Deidara wasn't in the room… Though he did accidentally read a paragraph of a SasoDei I was reading—it was really just a fluffy one with no lime, but still. He didn't even look at me for an hour, but I guess he eventually got bored so we started watching stuff on T.V again—he threw the laptop under the bed where I couldn't get to it.

Once Alex got home Konan allowed me to get up and walk around so I could pack for my weekend at my aunt's. Deidara practically followed me around the whole time making sure I wouldn't fall on my face… Which that got awkward when I was packing bras and such…

"Isn't that the one from last weekend?" He pointed at the bra in question right as Hidan walked by my room and saw what he was pointing at.

"Jeez what happened last weekend?" Hidan smirked pervertedly.

I flushed even deeper red and shoved my clothing into my bag and pushed them both out and away from my room and finished packing.

Twenty minutes before my aunt was to come I called Tyler to tell them to come over soon so that the guys would get dinner—I'd make sure that when Alex and I left here, they'd be cats, so they needed kitty food—and to come check on them tomorrow but be warned that they'd probably be human. I knew at some point in the night they'd turn back into humans somehow.

Ten minutes before my aunt was to come I brought them all out into the garage and pulled the hose in to turn them back into cats, "Just promise to at least stay like that until Tyler and Jimmy leave, please!" Alex and I then ushered them back into the house and waited until my aunt came by relaxing in the living room.

My leg was hurting again and Konan was giving Alex and I one last healing session—as a cat, lol—before my aunt was to arrive while Itachi sat curled up on Alex's lap and Deidara sat on mine, but out of Konan's way.

_They really are soft as cats…_ I thought mindlessly as I stroked Deidara's head. I missed my other cats; though they were annoying, they were still good little cats…

Finally my aunt knocked on the door. I jumped up practically knocking Deidara and Konan off of me to get to the door—both of them following to make sure I didn't fall or whatever. I swung open the door and hugged my aunt—she really was my favorite on my mom's side.

I introduced her to Alex and we got all the bags into the car—the cats walking around us the whole entire time, even Pein and Kakuzu. Once we got all the bags loaded up—after Kisame almost knocked over my aunt, which Alex laughed at him for—we headed out to my aunts house after putting up the cats and saying goodbye.

_I hope they don't get into too much trouble while we're gone, _I thought absently as I watched my house disappear behind the corner.

Me: Ok, for those of you who haven't already seen it, there will be edits on my profile of the status of this story—like if I just died and can't finish or if I have major writer's block and need help, even when I might be starting a new story. Speaking of new stories, I came up with a plot last night when I COULD NOT SLEEP! It was pretty much Deidara coming to Sasori's art class as a teacher's assistant and becoming _good_ friends with one of the senior girls and perhaps starting a relationship or whatever… It was pretty good for how tired I was… Yet couldn't sleep…

Also! This morning when my dad woke me up, it was right when Gaara—idk why the hell he was in my dream and not an Akatsuki member, but I'll take it!—was about to do something awesome…

Oh yeah and I started watching a new anime! Black Blood Brothers. I love it! My friend actually caught my interest in it—a friend on here—so I decided to watch it! (Btw, I just met Zelmen in it and… I can see why you like him!)

Hidan: Are you done yet?

Me: I think so! But I would like to say that this is actually a pretty long chapter! So be happy! Alex, would you like to say anything?

Alex: You didn't put on that scene I told you about!

Me: Well that'll be...later....


	25. Chapter 25

Me: One of the people I message brought up a good point:

Do I agree with Deidara or Sasori on the whole art thing?

Well as much of a Deidara fangirl that I am...

I dont agree with either, or rather I agree with them both.

Art is expression of one's self.

Sasori is calm and collected, so of course his art would be eternal and everlasting. Calm, like him if you can get what I mean by that.

Deidara, however, is not calm and such. He shows a lot of emotion, his temper flares much like the explosions he makes.

Both thier art fits both thier personalities. So it's only natural that they'd both like that particular type of art.

As for me, I like calm things, so eternal art fits for me. I like looking at things for a while, but the explosions are amazing, too. It makes you appreciate it for the little amount of time it's there.

Alex: I think explosions are fucking awesome!

So, I guess I could actually say that I dont agree with either of them. Art can be whatever you want it to be since it is just an expression of yourself and what you feel.

Deidara/Sasori: Wow...

Me: ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!

The drive to my aunt's house was very, very long seeing as it _was_ after all a two hour ride… But that's what iPods are for, right? Right!

At times my aunt would ask the usual questions about school and such and we'd give the usual answer of, "It's fine." Instead of the actual answer which would be a long, sad explanation on how school is a prison for kids that prepares us for the prison known as work after we get out of school… But this is beside the point

Once we got there we put our bags in the room we'd be staying in and while my aunt made dinner—yummy veggie soup—Alex and I went on the computer to look at some AMVs, though once she was done we got off and watched _Sixteen Candles_. My aunt loves classic movies, and I can't say I blame her. Any movie she shows me always turns out good.

We were about a quarter through the movie when Alex burst out laughing, "LONG DUCK _DONG_?"

I nodded, "Yup. I wonder if anyone is really named that… They would have been made fun of a lot as a teenager…"

Alex didn't answer since she was still laughing so much, though she did calm down eventually… And then Long Duck Dong was drunk in a tree calling out, "Oh sexy girlfriend!"

…Yes, Alex did burst out laughing again and almost spilled her soup. "WHAT THE CRAP! THIS MOVIE IS SO RANDOM!"

"But you love it," I said.

She nodded, still laughing. After we watched that, we decided to go to bed and got Alex a magnet mattress for the floor she'll be sleeping on—yes, I get the bed!—but it really was comfortable. Whenever Halle and I were over I'd get the floor and she'd get the bed… Not fun…

After we'd gotten settled in our beds I heard Alex's voice from the floor, "What do you think the guys are doing right now?"

"Hopefully not killing my house."

"Like you'd do anything to them if they did."

"Yeah, I'd pour water on them… Or just the ones that did anything."

I saw Alex shoot up from her spot on the floor, "Not Itachi, though!"

I sat up, too, "Yes, Alex, Itachi, too." **(A/N: TOO MANY COMMAS!) (A/N: - THAT WAS NOT AN ALEX NOTE! GRRRRR!)**

"Nope!" I hated how Alex could be so difficult at times…

I sighed, "If he were to kill me house then he'd have to be puni—"

"There is a turtle on a conveyer belt therefore your argument is invalid." **(A/N: I love that saying!)**

I glared at her through the darkness, "Stew the turtle has nothing to do with this!"

She raised an eyebrow, "Stew?"

"It was the first name I could think of, ok?"

Alex rolled her eyes and laid back down; I did the same…for a few minutes… Since Alex forgot to turn off her phone, it started blaring _Into the Ocean_. She groaned and crawled to pick it up and answer it, "Who the hell are you, and why are you calling at midnight-thirty?" She waited for a name… "OH! HI ITACHI!"

"Shhh!" I threw a pillow at her, "I don't want my aunt to ask who would be calling this late!"

Alex narrowed her eyes and went back to the phone, "Fine… So, why are you calling…? Really…? They're really that stupid…? Yeah stupid question…." She then started telling him how to set up Guitar Hero.

I facepalmed, "These boys really need help…"

"Ok, is there anything else?" Alex asked. There was a pause, "Yes, I'm fine Itachi." Ha! I knew he wasn't just calling about the game! **(A/N: Yes! WIN!)** I turned over and tried to fall back asleep while Alex talked to Itachi. From what I was hearing it sounded like Itachi was turning into a mother hen with all his worrying over Alex's—almost healed thanks to Konan—leg. She stopped talking for a minute and I felt her put the phone on the side of my face, "Someone wants to talk to you, too."

I sighed, "Why couldn't you just hand it to me like a normal person?"

"Well, this is Alexis you're talking about, hm." Deidara's voice came from the other line.

Shaking my head I sat up and held the phone to my face, "True, but still. Now, to more important matters, why was my sleep interrupted?"

I heard him laugh on the other line, "If Itachi can spend five minutes fretting over Alex, I can at least say hi to you all, un."

For some reason I had to laugh. Laugh at the fact that in a span of a few short weeks we've turned a bunch of S-Class criminals into people that actually _care_. …Ok so maybe just Itachi, Deidara, Kisame, Konan, and maybe Sasori care, but still! And of course Itachi does still have a heart…as does Konan most likely…but, still… I'm amazed that they care at all about us at all!

"What's so funny?" Deidara asked suspiciously from the other line.

I shook my head even though he couldn't see it, "Nothing, nothing, but you do have a point I suppose."

"Ok…well?"

"Well what?"

"How's _your_ leg, hm?"

"Ah, well, I'd have to say that it's exactly the same as it was a few hours ago when I saw you."

"Don't be all sarcastic. Something could have happened, like it getting infected and needing to be sawed off…"

I twitched and glared at Alex, "You've been hanging around Alex too much if you even think of jumping to conclusions like that…"

"Yeah, most likely. So, it is fine?" **(A/N: YAY! My bluntness is an epidemic!)**

"I swear you and Itachi have turned into mother hens! This is what our world does to heart-less S-Class criminals? Oh woe is you!"

"I thought we couldn't yell?" Alex hissed.

"Whoops?" I shrugged.

"…Are you on something, yeah?" Deidara asked seriously.

"If you mean a sugar high, then, yes!"

"Even though you were almost asleep a minute ago…" Alex grumbled.

"So the ice cream finally kicked in," I shrugged, "Sue me." A few seconds later, the high left—I swear I'm bipolar with those things—and I decided to say goodbye to Deidara and go to sleep.

I love it when my aunt makes coffee cake for breakfast. It's an explosion of brown sugar-y goodness!

"Now I know why you're always talking about this stuff!" Alex took another mouthful, "It's soooo good!"

"Yes, but it doesn't _look_ good when it's in your mouth," I rolled my eyes.

Alex attempted to stick her tongue out at me, but failed, of course. Sticking out your tongue with a mouth full of food is quite difficult.

"Use that gray matter between your ears, Alex." I muttered.

"MINE IS PURPLE THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"

I facepalmed, "Of course it is Alex, of course."

The rest of the day was spent with me and my aunt teaching Alex how to play squeak and other assorted card games. Now that my aunt and I were teaching her slowly, she was getting the hang of it… She even beat us three times… Beginner's luck I say! And I wasn't going as fast as I usually do… **(A/N: OMJ! I hate that game it's soo hard to figure out!)**

**That's so what she said!**

_You pervert, that's what _he_ said!_

**Oh yeah!**

And that is how we spent our day. Playing cards then watching movies. A normal day at Aunt Sue's!

…But not a normal night.

My aunt turned in a bit early for when we come over—she went in at only ten o' clock—which left Alex and I to do whatever. So, after the T.V bored us we decided to go walk around outside…at night… This neighborhood seems pretty nice, ok?

"Wanna walk around the lake?" I asked Alex when we stepped outside—it was a nice temperature outside, not too hot, not too cold.

Alex gave me a look, "The WHOLE lake?"

I thought about it for a minute, "Ok, how about we walk to the end of this part and turn back?" The lake itself seems to be shaped like a capital 'D' and I figured we could walk down the straight edge and back.

Alex nodded, "Yeah, that works."

We were all the way to the end before I decided to tell Alex, "Oh, and, watch out for crocodiles." I turned around and headed back to the house smiling to myself.

Alex ran up beside me, "CROCODILES? What the fuck, Abby?"

I turned to her with an oh-so-innocent expression, "What? There are some in the lake." I continued walking.

Alex caught up to me, but this time she was the one walking near the forest and I was walking near the lake. I didn't really mind; I've been here many a time and I haven't gotten eaten once, yet!

…Of course I haven't really walked around this lake all that much… So, halfway back, guess what happens? Yup, we hear a random hiss/growling sound from the direction of the lake.

**(Author not Alex/N: Ok, if one person tells me that I have a lot of facts wrong about crocodiles/alligators in their review, I will personally send Hidan after them! I don't know about them and I am way too lazy to find it! You just be happy I'm not making it bark or meow or even moo!)**

"Abby…" Alex inched closer to me as we stopped and stared at the lake, "Wh-What was that?"

"Well I doubt it's a pony." I hissed at her. The growling sounded again. "We should get moving, Alex." I tried walking forward, but Alex was frozen in place. I grabbed her arm, "Come on, Alex! Just because it hasn't come out yet doesn't mean that it won't at all." Almost as if on cue the beast raced out of the water towards Alex and I. I let go of Alex's arms to shield myself from it.

But all that happened was me hearing a loud 'thud' sort of noise and a big splash followed by, "I _told you_ they'd get into some sort of trouble, yeah! Now are you happy we came?"

I put my arms down to see Deidara look from the forest behind me to me and start walking forward. It took me a minute to process all of this. "WHAT THE HELL DUDE? Where in the hell did you come from!"

"So, you aren't happy I just saved you from being mauled by an alligator?" He questioned.

I raised an eyebrow, "I thought it was a crocodile?"

Deidara facepalmed, "Never mind…" He looked back towards the forest, "Oi, Itachi, you there?"

I looked behind me to see Itachi walk out of the forest and look to his left, "I didn't know she could run so fast."

Ok, confused. I looked where he was looking to see Alex half way back to my aunt's running in a zig-zag. "WELL THANKS FOR TRYING TO SAVE ME!" I yelled after her and began stomping after her, "Ok, so why the hell are you two here?" **(A/N: That's so me! :D)**

"Deidara thought that you two would get into some sort of trouble." Itachi said bluntly.

"Don't pretend like you weren't worried either, hm!" Deidara shot back at Itachi. "And I was right wasn't I? They were almost killed."

"If Alex had stayed, we could of taken on a small alligator like that!" I pouted.

Deidara patted me on the head, "It was as big as you."

"Psh, it was probably only a four footer! I'm five foot…something or other inches…thank you very much! I mean, that thing could have been six feet if we were in a larger lake or even the everglades!" I brushed his hand off. He rolled his eyes and I sighed, "Itachi, could you please go get Alex? She's probably pissing her pants thinking I'm dead." I didn't have to say another word; Itachi was gone in a flash and there was a sudden screaming of his name by an excited Alex… "Great, now she'll try to get attacked by alligators in order to make Itachi appear." **(A/N: OMG I GOTTA TRY THAT!)**

"Well if we think that'll happen again, we'll definitely go after you two." Deidara put his hands behind his head and sighed.

I jabbed him in the side, "We aren't that much of a handful are we?"

He dodged my jab easily, "Yes, you are, but it makes our lives a little more fun."

I rolled my eyes as a thought dawned upon me, "How did you find us?"

"You two are the only other ones within a large range with chakra besides us, hm. It wasn't hard."

"Well how long did it take you to get here?"

"Since we headed straight for here without any turns or anything, and ran at full speed, it only took us about an hour." He smirked.

I glared, "Why must there be turns in roads? It just makes the journey all that much longer!"

Deidara let out a laugh, "And your cars go pretty slow compared to us running, hm."

"Ok, that's it, I'm learning how to run like you two so I never have to spend two hours in a car again!" I proclaimed.

He patted my head, "You do that."

We finally caught up to Itachi and Alex and she was, of course, glomping him to near death while he was keeping balance perfectly; something I have never been able to do… Damn you ninja!

"Ok, ok, don't kill the man." I dragged her off of him.

"Whatever!" She got out of my hold and pouted, "Why are you two here anyways?"

"We were worried about you," Was Itachi's blunt and to-the-point response. **(A/N:Yay bluntness!)**

Alex rolled her eyes, "Whatever…" then turned to me, "Can we have fun with them before they leave? Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, plea—"

"ALRIGHT ALREADY!" I snapped and Alex grinned, " What do you want to do?"

She thought for a second, "…Well I would say swim in the lake but there's monsters in there and they'd turn into kitties… Hmm… Hide and Seek." She nodded, "Yes Hide and Seek."

I jumped up and down, "Yes! Totally!"

Deidara gave me an odd look, "I would think you'd be against anything Alex would say, hm."

"I love Hide and Seek, I would never turn it down!" I grinned, "What should the teams be?" Alex was about to say something when I cut her off, "Ok, no, don't answer that. It'll just be boys vs. girls."

She pouted, "Aww fine…"

I smirked, "I could always make the teams you and Dei, and Itachi and me."

Her head popped up, "Boys vs. girls it is!" She grabbed my arm and we started walking off, "You two count to fifty and then come look for us!"

We started walking farther and farther away, "You know," I stated, "This'll be very easy for them… I mean…they can sense our chakra and such…"

She turned back to me with an evil smirk, "Which is why we'll hide by ourselves. Itachi'll find me and Deidara will find you. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

I whacked her, "There are people sleeping! Plus, that is kind of smart…" Then it dawned on me, "_That's_ why you wanted to play this? So you could be alone with Itachi?"

She hugged me, "You know me so well!"

I pushed her off, "Yeah, yeah… Aww I had a good comeback but it's gone now!"

"Well while you think on that, I'm going to go this way and look for a hiding place." She ran off, "Good luck!"

And with that, I was alone…in the dark…in a neighborhood I don't really know… Oh, and let's not forget how much I hate the dark… "Well…shit…" I started walking around aimlessly since I didn't see a point in hiding. He'd find me even if he couldn't see me. I tried to focus on locating Deidara's—if anyone's—chakra. It was proving difficult. "Argh! They make it so easy on the show! They just close their eyes and BAM they can sense a person a mile away." I pouted. How much time has gone by since Alex left me? Probably about two minutes… But that's enough time for him to finally find me! Right?

"You know it takes a lot of training to be able to sense chakra like that?" A voice came from behind me.

I yelped and turned around, scared shitless, to see Deidara smirking, "Don't sneak up on me like that at night!" I took a few deep breaths with my hand over my heart, "I almost had a damn heart attack!"

He didn't even try to hide his laughter, "And you call yourself a ninja?"

"A ninja in training, thank you very much!"

"Right, of course," he rolled his eyes, "Ok, now what?"

"Umm… We could go see what Itachi and Alex are doing? Or if he's found her?"

Again, didn't even try to hide his laughter, "Oh he found her a few seconds after she left you, un."

I raised a curious eyebrow, "And you know this how?"

"I saw her leave you and Itachi catch her, of course."

"…YOU WERE STALKING ME?" I punched him in the arm lightly.

"Yup, and it wasn't hard either." He shook his head, "You were so scared you wouldn't hear that alligator coming up behind you, yeah."

I pouted and glared, "Well excuse me for being scared of the dark… Well at least when I'm alone…"

Deidara patted my head again, "Well now you don't have to be afraid of something that you can't even touch."

I swatted at his hand, "It's the things hiding in the dark that are scary!"

"Like I was, un? So you're afraid of me, hm?" He mocked.

"Well only if you blow me up, too." I teased back then stared at the ground. "…Will you really kill yourself now when you go back…?"

He was silent for a minute and I thought he might not have heard what I said. I was about to repeat it when he stopped walking, "I won't go and kill myself, yeah… But…I can't promise anything for later in my life and other fights; which also goes for that Sasuke fight."

I looked up at him, "What do you mean?"

Again, he paused, "…If I didn't kill myself in the explosion, then would Sasuke have won, un?"

Oddly enough, I couldn't help but smile, "Well, actually, there's an easy way for you to avoid that all together."

He raised an eyebrow, "And that would be?"

My smile grew, "Just never go after Sasuke. That's how you go into the fight to begin with. You went after him with Tobi at some point in the series."

He raised an eyebrow, "It can't be that easy and why did I go after him in the first place?"

I thought for a minute, "Right… You heard that Naruto and his group were about looking for Itachi and Sasuke… And you held a grudge against Naruto for punching you in the face as well as disrespecting your art…"

"He what?"

I held up a finger to him, "I'm not done. So not only do you go out to look for Naruto, but Sasuke as well since he killed Orochimaru… And you wanted to do that."

"So, I shouldn't go after either of them, ever, un.?"

I nodded, "Pretty much, I guess."

Deidara looked up ahead, "They're up there."

Right as I was about to say something, Alex's loud mouth interrupted me. "I GOT IT! PIXIE STIX! NO ONE CAN RESIST THE GREATNESS THAT IS PIXIE STIX!"

I facepalmed, "What the hell, Alex?"

"Come on, let's go see what she's yelling about." He grabbed my hand and led me over to them. "What are you all yelling about now, hm?"

When we got to them Alex was running around like an idiot while Itachi watched her, amused. "Alex found a way to get Tobi to forgive her."

I tore my eyes away from Alex's... Alex-ness, "Forgive her?"

Itachi nodded, "For putting him on the fan while he was in his feline form."

"Kisame did that, too, yeah." Deidara put in.

"Kisame gave him a cookie..."

It was silent for a minute - even Alex had stopped being herself.

"That boy is too easily swayed, hm." Deidara rolled his eyes.

"Why the hell would Madara even try to accept that?" I mumbled to myself.

"Who?" Deidara turned to me.

"Nothing! Nothing at all! Heh, heh!" I sweatdropped.

"...I'm not going to even try to ask..."

"A-Anyways, you're going to give Tobi pixie stix to make him forgive you?" I asked Alex

She nodded, "Yup!"

"Well this can only end in disaster." A thought occured to me, "Um, what time is it, guys?"

Itachi pulled out a cell phone, "11:00."

I nearly fell over, "WE WASTED ALMOST AN HOUR?"

Deidara put his finger to my lips, "Inside voice when we're outside at night, yeah."

"Fine..."

"Well at least it wasn't his full hand," Alex remarked.

My face heated up at the memory of the time that that _did_ happen, "R-Right..."

Deidara backed away from me by a few inches, "Tch..."

I shook my head, "No, wait, you all have to go. We have to be inside soon. My aunt could get up at any time and see we aren't there."

Alex's face suddenly looked so depressed, "They have to leave...already...?"

I let go of Deidara's hand and pulled Alex away from Itachi - she had migrated over there durning all this and I was still holding his hand from earlier. "Yes, but we'll see them tomorrow."

"But they just got here!" She protested. She looked like a little kid who hadn't gotten her way. She even started to tear up like said little kid.

"Don't you go crying on me!" I snapped at her. "You're so weird when you cry. So, unnormal!"

"That's not a word." Deidara remarked.

Again, I was interrupted by Alex as she let out a little sob/hiccup thingy, "I don't want them to leave yet..." One little tear fell over. "I don't want any of them to leave, ever."

Itachi came up in front of her and bent down to her eye level, "We'll see each other tomorrow." He kissed away the tear on her cheek before pulling back. "I promise."

Alex nodded, "Ok..."

"Oh, sure, when I say that you get all sad, but when he does it's like everything is all right as rai-" I was **_AGAIN_** cut off as a pair of lips touched gently to mine.

Deidara pulled back smiling, "Alex is just difficult like that."

"It's Alexis to you!" Alex threw her shoe at him.

I glared at her, "Thank you for ruining the moment."

She smiled, "You shoulda used your time alone wisely like we did!" Alex hugged Itachi one last time.

"I didn't need to know that, Alex!" I tried to hit the mental images out of my head. It wasn't working.

She just shrugged and started walking back to the house, "See you tomorrow, Itachi!"

"Goodbye, Alex." He turned and jumped away all ninja like.

I rolled my eyes and turend to Deidara, "I'll see you tomorrow." I started to walk away but was grabbed and turned back around to have the same pair of lips collide with mine again.

When he pulled away again, he was still smiling, "Just one more that Alex couldn't ruin, un." Then, he jumped away.

The walk back to my aunt's house was a big haze. Twice. I was just kissed by Deidara of the Akatsuki twice in a row. When I got back to the house, Alex was already there. "What took you so long?" Her voice was knowing despite the question.

I glared, recovering from my haze, "It's time for sleep." Then walked inside to get changed into PJs and go to bed - I had to sleep on the floor tonight. Alex was still upset that Itachi had to leave but she still fell asleep quickly.

* * *

Noon the next day, we left to go back home. Yet, on the way back Alex and I kept seeing black flashes going through the trees at the sides of the road. I rolled my eyes, "Those boys worry too much..."

"Can you blame them?" Alex whispered to me so my aunt couldn't hear.

I turned to her, "What do you mean?"

"Well, Itachi's just naturally protective because of Sasuke and such."

"Obviously, Alex, but what do you mean for Deidara?"

She smirked, "From what we've seen in the anime, who else is there that Deidara actually cared about?"

I scratched the top of my head, "Wasn't there something on Narutopedia that said something about him having a big brother or something?"

She shrugged, "I don't know! I never read that, you know that. You're my Narutopedia!" **(A/N: It's true she is...)**

I glared, "Of course I am, but get to your point!"

"He hasn't ever had anyone to care about, and now you're here. You're his first chance to watch out for someone - or something - besides himself."

"...So now I'm a thing?"

Alex whacked my arm, "You know what I mean!"

I sat back in my seat, "Yeah, I guess so... Wait..." I sat up straight and stared at her, "WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET SO SMART? WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH ALEX?"

"Hey!" Again, I was whacked, but not hard, "I have my moments!"

* * *

The guys had beat us home, of course, and were also, of course, in cat form until my aunt left. After she did, the guys got some warm water and turned back into humans... Though they did that _before_ I had a chance to block it out.

After they got changed I was in a corner trying to get the images of them out of my brain - since some were scary and other's were embarrassing... - whereas Alex was passed out on the floor in a nosebleed. I think the only person she looked at was Itachi. I woke her up by saying that Karin was here and giving Itachi a lap dance... A poor lamp had to suffer her wrath in her confussion.

When Monday came, it was just another boring day as Monday's usually are.

And then Tuesday came and Hidan got bored while we were at school and must have found some left over beer somewhere - and a lot of beer at that since, when we found him, he was passed out in the middle of the living room with Kisame and Deidara on the floor, too, but they were laughing thier sorry asses off.

"What happened?" I asked, annoyed.

Deidara stopped laughing long enough to explain, "Hidan found some more beer in the garage and drank most of it himself. He came in slurring his words and stumbling everywhere before passing out here right before you two came in; hence our laughing, hm."

I just rolled my eyes and went to my room to do homework... Again... It only took about half an hour and when I went back to the living room, I came back to a **_very_** unusual sight: Alex and Kisame were just finishing putting **_PEANUT BUTTER_** all over Hidan. I only had two things to say, "Alex... What... The... Fuck?"

"This is what he gets for being a drunk!" She nodded to herself.

**I thought you had two things to say?**

_And here's number two: _"Well, ok, but I get the arm!" Before I even had time to process everyone's starnge looks at me, I ran over to Hidan and started to lick some of the peanut butter off of his arm. Right when I got to his shoulder, however, he woke up. It was an awkward moment, with Hidan looking at me with a raised eyebrow and me in mid-lick on his shoulder.

"Can I ask you _why_ you're licking me?" Hidan asked.

I lifted my head and pointed at Alex and Kisame, "They were the ones to put peanut butter on you. Alex should have known I couldn't resist peanut butter!"

A very perverted grin made it's way to Hidan's lips, "Well then why stop at my shoulder?"

Before I had a chance to reply, Hidan had a foot-shaped bruise forming on his face from Deidara's kick, "No one likes a pervert, Hidan, hm." **(A/N: I DO!)**

Hidan was rubbing his face as he sat up and glared at Deidara, "You just say that because you want the idea for yourself."

Alex - if you hadn't guessed by now - was officially choking on laughter on the floor with Kisame right next to her. Even Sasori was choking on laughter at all of it.

Then Wednesday came and, as you know, things always have to happen on Wenesdays!

Well, here's what happened:

Remember how Alex was going to appoligize to Tobi? With Pixie Stix? Well, on the way home we made Itachi and Deidara stop by a 7-11. Alex and Itachi went in to buy the stix while I waited outside with Deidara for them. It didn't take long and soon we were home and Alex was begging for forgiveness. If she didn't think he'd probably kill her for her antics, I don't think she'd ever have done this...

"I'm sorry for what I did, Tobi! So, here are some Pixie Stix!" She handed them to him.

He stared at her for a minute before attackng her in a glomp, "Tobi forgives you Alex-chan! But... How do you eat these?"

I left them to do thier thing while I went into my room to surf the internet, though that didn't last too long since about then mintues later I heard the product of giving Tobi Pixie Stix and letting Alex share them... So, I walked out into the living room to see a very peculiar sight.

Alex and Tobi were singing _'Here For Your Entertainment'_ By Adam Lambert.

"So hot  
Out the box  
Can we pick up the pace  
Turn it up, heat it up  
I need to be entertained  
Push the limit  
Are you with it?  
Baby don't be afraid  
I'ma hurt you real good, baby."

I stared at them. The had the lyrics up on the computer so that Tobi could sing along.

"Let's go  
It's my show  
Baby, do what I say  
Don't trip off the glitz  
That I'm gonna display  
I told ya  
I'ma hold you down till your amazed  
Give it to ya 'till you're screamin' my name"

"What the hell kind of song are you all singing?" Deidara walked in and stared at them.

"Didn't I tell her not to ever sing again?" Hidan glared at them.

I stared incredulously at Hidan, "You really thought that would work?"

He looked back at me, "Well yeah!"

"It's alright  
You'll be fine  
Baby, I'm in control  
Take the pain  
Take the pleasure  
I'm the master of both  
Close your eyes  
Not your mind  
Let me into your soul  
I'ma work ya 'till you're totally blown!"

Itachi walked in then, "What is she singing now?"

"A perverted song sung by the only guy in the real world I find hot... Very perverted indeed."

"Hot, yeah?" Deidara stared at me.

I smirked, "I have a thing for guys with guyliner, Mr. Black Circles." **(A/N: Yeah its true guyliner iz the shiz!)**

He smirked back, "Ok then."

Hidan, however, wasn't taking this all in stride. He had his hands over his ears, "How is she alowed to even open that mouth of hers?"

"Oh oh…mmmm  
Entertainment…  
Oh oh…..Oh entertainment…  
I'm here for your entertainment"

Hidan ran over and put his hand over Alex's mouth, "Shut the hell up already!" Alex looked up at him and glared for a minute then her eyes gleamed with this look... Point blank, I wouldn't want to be Hidan right now. And, I was right! It was only a matter of seconds before Hidan let out a loud shout of, "WHAT THE FUCK YOU CRAZY BITCH?" And Alex sang our favorite part of the song very obnoxiously,

"Oooohhh…..  
Do you like what you see?  
Wooooaaaahhhh…  
Let me entertain ya 'till you screeeeaaaaam!"

I, no matter how much I wanted to, didn't join in the singing. I didn't want Hidan pissed at me as well.

He glared at her, "WHY IN THE FUCKING HELL DID YOU LICK MY HAND?"

Once Alex was done singing she looked over at him, "Abby isn't the only one that gets to lick you, you know!"

"That sounded so wrong in so many ways." Kisame grinned which was followed by being whacked by Itachi and Deidara. Was it too weird to say that I was getting used to them doing all this crazy stuff?

"I need my shower iPod stuff!" Alex said randomly.

Ok... So I'll never get used to Alex - Itachi may be the only one who can do that, if anyone - but I was getting used to the rest of them.

"What iPod stuff?" I asked.

"So I can listen to my iPod in the shower!"

"Why did you not bring that when you first came over?" Itachi asked.

"Because I didn't want to go back home, even for that. My mom annoys me, but she won't be home this weekend! I just remembered she has this nurse seminar to go to for the weekend!" Alex said.

"Alex?" I grinned a very evil grin.

Alex backed away from me a bit, "What...?"

"You're house has a pool, does it not?"

Alex's face immediately turned to match mine, "Yeah..." Then it went to confused, "Wait why do you wanna know?"

I facepalmed. "If no one will be there this weekend, why not have the guys go over and we could have a pool party and stay there for a night?"

"WE GET TO GET OUT OF THIS SHIT HOLE?" Hidan jumped up excitedly.

"But would we not turn back into felines if we did that?" Itachi asked.

Alex smiled, "My pool is heated."

"Another water logged eventure, lovely." Sasori said with heavy sarcasm.

I went over and patted him on the back, "I'll hang out with you a while, buddy! Trust me... Pools aren't always my thing."

Sasori patted my head, "Thanks, but it's not really needed."

I shrugged, "Too late."

"What day should we leave for Alexis's house, un?" Deidara asked.

"Saturday." Alex and I said at the same time.

That's when Pein and Konan walked in with Zetsu, "I doubt we'll be going." Pein voiced.

I shook my head, "You are both going! It's not like we're going anywhere public. You all need to go, too!"

Konan thought for a minute, "I think it would be fun, Pein-sama."

"I could get some sun there... **I haven't been outside in a while."** Zetsu said.

Pein sighed, "Fine, but I won't be doing much of anything. Tobi, Itachi, we need to talk to you two in private for a minute." Pein, Konan, and Zetsu then walked out to the Florida Room.

Tobi ran after them, all happy and Tobi like while Itachi kissed Alex on the forehead, "I'll be right back."

Those five have been acting too secretive lately... Oh well, if it's important, I'll find out later.

Thursday came and went, as did Friday.

Saturday morning, however, I just seemed to wake up early and couldn't go back to sleep. I sighed and got up, careful not to disturb Deidara who was pretty much living in my bed now, and went out into the kitchen for a breakfast, though I didn't expect to see Hidan there as well. Nor, did I expect him to be on the floor trying to stifle the loud laughter I knew was trying to escape his lips. I walked up to him and put my hand on his shoulder, "Hidan? You ok?"

He sucked in a breathe of air before pointing at the kitchen. He didn't even try to talk, lest he wake up everyone with his huge roaring laughter.

So, I looked up towards the kitchen to find a very peculiar sight: Itachi and Alex were sleeping in a sleeping bag in the entrance way to the kitchen. Unlike Hidan, however, my laughter didn't stay quiet, but it wasn't loud enough to wake up everyone; just Itachi and Alex. "Wh-What the hell, Al-Alex?" I asked between laughs.

She sat up and stared at me. "Kisame was snoring! So, I came out here and Itachi found me out here and, well, slept with me."

"Who did what in the kitchen?" Kisame's voice came from behind us. **(A/N: lolz I love Kisame!)**

Laughter not only exploded from me, but from Hidan as well, thus waking up the entire house. Looks like we'll be leaving for Alex's sooner than I expected.

* * *

Me: This is what I finish when I'm at my aunts house...bored... Now what to do... Write the next chapter? Perhaps xD But, come on people! Review! Pleaseeee xDDD Oh and SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING QUICKER! I didn't realize how long it has been! But, I'm out of school now, so I'll try to work on it more but... I still have to take some summer classes - not not summer school; I'm not a flunkie, just some stuff that I didn't take durning the year. Now! Why don't you explain to the readers why you were Gaara for a day, Alex?

Alex:Oh yeah lolz I didn't sleep for 2 days and 2 nights just cuz i felt like it lol and i looked like Gaara! YAY and Abby drew on mai forehead! :D! Abby don't forget the facebook stuff!

Me: Ok well we made accounts for the Akatsuki! Thier names are like this: Pein Yeahjustpein Use that to find the rest! And dont fuck up the accounts! Or else! I'll make a shitty ending to this! Ok reivew now xD


	26. Chapter 26

Me: You know… The 'M' on my keyboard is wearing away… As well as the 'D' a bit… I wonder why?

Deidara: Gee I wonder…-.-

Me: Oh blah! OH RIGHT! People! Thank you for adding the Akatsuki on Facebook! Also, have any of you wanted to see the picture of Deidara Abby had a nosebleed over? Hmm? Well! For those of you that added me on Facebook, it's on there! But for those of you who didn't, just go to DevaintART and type in, "Deidara: Sweet Bath".

Deidara: -.-

Me: Also, for those of you who think this thing is going over T rated for whatever reason you think… I'm sorry but: Shut. Up. Have you seen a lemon here? Or someone's leg being chopped off? Or anything like that? No -.- Everyone here—except Hidan…we're not too sure…—hasn't lost a limp and are virgin so, please, just calm down -.- This is the kind of shit teens say everyday so just don't get your panties in a bunch! Unless you're a guy reading this… If you are, please do leave a review! I'd like to know there are guys on here ^_^ Anyways… Done ranting! ON WITH THE SHOW/STORY!

* * *

_Recap:_

_She sat up and stared at me. "Kisame was snoring! So, I came out here and Itachi found me out here and, well, slept with me."_

_"Who did what in the kitchen?" Kisame's voice came from behind us. **(A/N: lolz I love Kisame!)**_

* * *

Laughter not only exploded from me, but from Hidan as well, thus waking up the entire house. Looks like we'll be leaving for Alex's sooner than I expected.

After explaining everything to Kisame, we started getting everyone packed… Until Alex pulled me into her room suddenly.

"Ow, Alex, what the hell?" I asked as I tried not to trip over stuff.

"I have to tell you what happened last night with me and Itachi!" She yelled/whispered.

"I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW!" I covered my ears trying to get away.

She pulled me back. "Don't be such a pervert! It's PG!"

I raised an eyebrow at her, "Well then what happened?"

Her face brightened up as her smiled stretched across her face, "Itachi told me that he loves me!"

My eyes stretched wide as I stared at her, "Alex, that's great!"

She nodded, "Mhmm! Now, come on, we have to go help pack!" She ran out of the room.

I walked and smirked - paybacks a bitch, Alex. I opened my mouth, took in a big breath of air and yelled, loudly. "ITACHI LOVES ALEX, ITACHI LOVES ALEX, ITACHI LOVES ALEX!" Then skipped to my room to pack, smirking as I passed Alex.

"Must you tell them of my personal life?" She asked.

I nodded, "You told them about when Deidara kissed me, so, yes, I must!"

After half an hour of running around trying to pack, we all finally got dressed in swim suits, packed up the van, and headed out. Alex's leg was doing much better now and she could actually drive! …With Itachi right next to her, ready to hit the emergency break just in case she swerved… We are counting on you Itachi!

On the way there we turned on the radio and guess what song came on? "Dude Looks like a Lady". Yup. It did. And what did Alex _and_ I do? We sang along, very loudly. And then what did Tobi do? He said plain and simple, "Deidara-senpai, they made a song about you!"

There was blood all over the van by the time we got to Alex's house. We'll need to get that cleaned... **(A/N: Thanks a lot Tobi, now I have to clean!)**

The first thing all of us did was throw our bags into the living room and run to the backyard to get into the pool. Kisame, Hidan, and Tobi all jumped in once they saw the big pool. I turned to Alex, "It's heated already right?"

She nodded, "My mom doesn't care about the earth so she constantly uses energy to do this..."

"I see." I made my way over to the deck thingy, "Alex did you put sun block on?"

"Yes _mother!_ I did!"

"I just don't want you complaining to me and Itachi about sunburn!" I sat down on one of the deck chairs and watched Alex drag Itachi over to the pool and jump in and Pein and Konan actually get into the shallow end while Kakuzu and Sasori sat on the edge watching everyone and Zetsu went to check out the plant life. That only left...

"Are you hydrophobic or something, un?" Deidara came up and sat on the chair next to me facing me.

"No, I just don't want to get in at the moment. Is that a problem?" I looked over at him.

He thought for a moment before smirking. "As a matter of fact, yes it is, hm!" With that he reached over, picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, ran towards the pool, and jumped in with me on his shoulder.

I swam up to the surface and gasped for air, "Warn a person would ya?"

Deidara only smirked, "But that's no fun and you know it." He swam off then to go bug Sasori by splashing him with water... It was kinda funny actually.

I swam over to where Alex was struggling to get on a floaty, "They needs to make these things easier to get on! WORK WITH ME FLOATY!"

"Yelling at it will not help, Alex." Itachi said smoothly and helped her up. **(A/N: Yes it will! It always does!)**

"Thank you!"

"Aww the two love birds get along so well!" I mock-cooed as I swam over.

Alex glared, "You're just jealous because Deidara's over with Sasori." She pointed over.

I shrugged, "Well I wouldn't talk to him anyways right now!"

"Not his fault you don't like water." She laughed.

I glared as Alex tried to get more comfortable in her floaty... Which gave me an idea. Payback again! I pointed at her chest and yelled out, "TAME THOSE THINGS WOMAN!"

Her face actually flushed a light pink as some of the guys looked over and Itachi stared at me like I was insane, "I hate you so much, Abby."

"Love you too, Alex!"

A little while later Alex got Kisame to swim around underwater and attack Tobi while she sang the Jaws theme song. It took some convincing and a little bribery, but we finally got him to, and let me tell you, that was the funniest thing ever!

...

...

...

Ok, that wasn't, but the stuff that happened after almost made me die of laughter.

Pein and Konan had gotten out and were lounging in some deck chairs when Alex found her water guns... Pein must not be a good ninja since Alex was able to sneak up on him, hit him with the gun, give it to Tobi who was out of the pool due to Kisame, and hide behind some bushes. Poor Tobi never saw it coming... Two beatings in one day, poor kid. But it was still funny as fuck and I couldn't stop laughing for a good five minutes.

After that I swam around a little bit more with Alex, Itachi, and Deidara when Alex's head perked up, "Rematch."

"Huh?" I asked.

"Chicken rematch!" She yelled and was already trying to get on Itachi's back... With much of his help.

I sighed, "Must we - GAH!" Deidara had hoisted me up onto his shoulders already.

"We won last time, we'll win again, un." He said, glaring at Itachi who Itachi-glared right back.

"Blah, fine!" I said as Alex called Kisame over to be the referee. The battle began and soon, Alex had knocked me off of Deidara. That water hurt... "I hate you," I said as I came back up to the surface. "Water hurts a lot you know!"

Alex stuck her tongue out at me, "Only if you lose!"

"Be nice, Alex." Itachi said as he helped her down.

"Fine fine... Hey..." She looked around, "Where's Hidan?"

"Oh fuck..." Deidara muttered looking at the roof - wait... ROOF?

I looked up too just in time to see Hidan running off of it yowling a cry of fun before landing smack in the middle of the pool, emptying almost half of it. "Good job, Hidan!" I yelled at him as I got out of the pool.

"That was fucking awesome and you know it!" He jumped out of the pool in one leap. **(A/N: Yes, yes it was)**

"Show-off," I mumbled.

"Heard that!" He yelled grabbing a towel.

I grabbed some as well and threw them to Alex, Itachi, and Deidara before getting one for myself.

"No one go inside until you're totally dry!" Alex yelled at them. After a few minutes, however, we were all nice and dry and go-inside-able... YAY FOR MADE UP WORDS? **(A/N: yes yay indeed...)**

...

...

...

...

...

Yup.

We directed everyone to the room that they'd be staying in - me, Deidara, Itachi, and Alex were going to be in her room, Alex and Itachi in her bed and me and Deidara on the floor - before us four headed to Alex's room.

"What in the hell, yeah?" Deidara said as he stared at the room.

I facepalmed, "You forgot about your room, didn't you?"

"Heh heh, maybe?" Alex shrugged.

Itachi just stared wide-eyed. Hey, I'd lose my cool too if I walked in on a room that was covered in me! There were Itachi curtains, sheets, pillows, plushies, figurines, sharingan contacts, Itachi necklace, Akatsuki rings, red cloud pillows, even Akatsuki wallpaper, and don't even get my started on what her closet would look like! ...There was even a life-size cut out of him in the corner of her room. "Alex?" He asked.

She turned to look at him, "Heh, yeah?"

"We need to have a talk later about your problem."

Kisame came up to all of us, "Hey what are you all doing standing arou - What in the flying Itachi explosion? Deidara did you blow up Itachi?"

"What? Hell no, un!" Deidara snapped at him.

Kisame stared back at Alex's room, "Good luck sleeping in there..."

"We shall need more than luck if we don't want to be drowned in Itachi." I muttered and walked into the room to put my bag of stuff down in a corner.

"Wouldn't that be suicide for Itachi, un?" Deidara asked, putting his stuff next to mine.

Itachi just glared at him and spoke in a whisper to him, "You are not one to talk, Deidara." I don't think I was supposed to hear that, but, alas, I did. But, before I could get too sad Alex interjected.

"Itachi'd never do that! He's too awesome!"

"You think all your obsessions are awesome." I sweatdropped. It was true. Though, wouldn't that be true for most people? I mean, you wouldn't obsess over something you thought was shitty...

"That's because they are!"

"It's kinda weird how you don't deny that you're obsessed...un..." Deidara commented.

"OH RINGS!" Alex yelled and ran over to her Akatsuki rings and took out Itachi's.

Deidara twitched, irritated. "Did she even hear me, un?"

I patted his back, "This is Alex. She has ADHD." **(A/N:YAY FOR ADHD!)**

"I do not!" She said playing with the ring. "Hmmm..." She then grabbed me and pulled me to the bathroom.

"Can I help you?" I asked, trying to put my arm back into its socket.

She held up her hand, "The rings!"

"...What about them?"

"We could give Itachi and Deidara their rings since they don't have thiers!" She bubbled.

I thought about it for a minute. "It'd be a good thing for them to remember us by, too... When they - "

"They will stay." Alex said, dead serious. Whenever Alex was against something, she was dead set. There was no persuading her that they might actually go back at some point, at least not unless she was told that they were leaving and she witnessed it herself. Until that point, she'll be disagreeing with me on it. Though, her optimism about it all is a bit more refreshing than my pessimism. I just had a feeling...

"Right, of course." I sighed. "We'll give them the rings, though. An Akatsuki member isn't a member without their cloak and ring." I walked out of the bathroom to Alex's room.

She followed right behind me, "And their pimp hats! You can't forget their sexy pimp hats!"

"Who has a pimp hat, un?" Deidara asked us when we came back.

I waved it off, walking over to the rings and picking up the green one - Deidara's, "Oh, nothing." I walked back over to them with it and both Alex and I put out our hands with the rings in them.

"Here," Alex said, "An Akatsuki member needs their ring." She closed her hand and reached for Itachi's to put his ring on the designated finger.

I did the same with Deidara, but not without being licked. I glared at him while he just smirked, "You are so lucky I don't find that freaky."

"You are definitely one of the first ones, un." His hand licked mine again.

After that, we went out into the living room and waited for everyone else to come out and we picked out a movie from Alex's large assortment and got some snacks. However, after much indecision, we didn't find anything in her DVDs and went to her PayPer View stuff on her T.V. We picked Alice In Wonderland. I always loved the original Disney version, and I loved Tim Burton things and, who doesn't love Johnny Depp?

"The wonders of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp will never cease to amaze me." I remarked during the movie. Soon, however, it was over and everyone was going to bed. I knew Alex was happy as a clam to be sleeping in her twin bed with Itachi - though that sleeping bag was probably the highlight of her life with Itachi - while Deidara and I got some blankets and pillows and crashed on the floor...

...Ok so maybe I used _him_ as a pillow _again_, but can I be blamed? No? Good!

However, my pillow just wasn't working for me tonight... I couldn't fall asleep. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 1 AM... I glared at the clock. Couldn't it at least say it was 4 AM so that maybe I wouldn't have to sit here for forever trying to fall asleep. I turned on my other side to see if I could maybe fall asleep like that. Nothing. On my back. Nothing. My stomach. Nothing. Looked at the clock, 1:01 AM. "Well fuck you too, time!" I whispered at the clock before sitting up, blowing a strand of hair out of my face. I flung off the sheets, careful not to wake up Deidara, got up, walked out of the room and out to the living room.

"Can't sleep?" Sasori spoke from the couch as I passed.)

I was on the ground clutching my chest, "Good mother of gravy..." I glared up at him, "Must you scare me shitless?" **(A/N: Along with everyone else in the known and unknown universes!)**

He smirked, "First off, yes, second, you should expect it now, and third, quiet or you'll wake everyone up."

I got up off the floor, "I hate you, I am not a ninja, and... Point taken..." I sighed. "I shouldn't have had so much sugar. It's keeping me up..."

"Then you will know next time." Sasori replied.

I laughed quietly, "Funny thing is, this is about the 100th time this has happened to me." I looked at the door to the backyard as Sasori shook his head at my stupidity. "I think I'll go back outside for a while."

Sasori shrugged, "Just don't get kid napped."

"Oh yeah because I can totally prevent that." I said as I walked out the door. I always loved Alex's backyard. Over to the right part of the yard was a little sitting area with little white Christmas lights strung around the over hanging pavilion thingy. I walked over to it and turned on the lights and sat down. Not a cloud in the sky tonight and there was in almost full moon hanging over me as I sat on one of the benches under the lights. "I should have brought my iPod." I mused to myself.

"You're addicted to that thing, un." Deidara's voice came from behind me and, again, I was on the floor clutching my chest, half having a heart attack and half pissed.

"What is with you two and scaring me shitless?" I glared at the ground. **(A/N: Like I said.)**

He laughed and walked over to me and pulled me up so I was standing, "Because it's fun."

I glared, "Meanie... Wait... Why are you out here?" I tilted my head to the side.

He shrugged, "You woke me up when you got up and I heard you talking to Sasori then come out here."

"So, you just followed me?"

He smirked, "I couldn't sleep either I guess, un." Deidara grabbed my hand and pulled me over to to bench with him and sat us both down. "Thanks for the ring, by the way."

"It's Alex's ring set. I didn't mind giving them away." I used his shoulder as a pillow again. What? He's comfy...

Deidara laughed again, "I doubt she'd give them away to anyone besides us, un."

"She did to me, you know." I looked up and him seriously.

He raised an eyebrow, "Seriously?"

I nodded, "Mhmm, when she first got her set, she let me have your ring until I got my own set. **(A/N: That totally happened I'm sooo generous! :D)**Then once I did, I gave her that one back." I pointed at the ring on his finger, "I used to wear it constantly, actually." I remembered. It hurt a lot since it only fit on the knuckle of my thumb, but I still wore it a lot.

"I don't recall ever seeing a ring set at your house, un."

"That's because it's lost somewhere in my closet... I swear I'd lose Kisame in there if I kept him there long enough." I giggled to myself. "Heh, Kisame coming out of the closet... Major lolz there..."

"You know he'd kill you if you told him that, un." Deidara joined my little giggle fest, though, of course, he chuckled, not giggled. Men do not giggle... Ok _straight_ men don't.

"I'm not the only one that would call him gay, you know! There's a lot of KisaIta yaoi fans out there!"

Deidara stopped laughing and shivered, "I never want to meet any of these fangirls..."

"Too late." I smirked, "You're talking to one right now, though, I don't really like KisaIta or ItaKisa..." I shook my head, "Nope, not at all."

"What's the difference between the two, un?"

I shook my head more, "You do not want to know about the complexity fangirls have towards the sacred choosing of ukes and semes in yaoi pairings!"

Deidara was now twitching, "Yeah, I really don't want to know _anything_, hm."

I yawned, "Good choice."

"Tired?"

"Yes and no..." My eyes drooped. "But if I go back inside now, it'll just wake me up."

Deidara pulled me a bit closer to him, "Then go to sleep, un."

He didn't have to tell me twice, I was asleep right after the 'un'.

* * *

When I woke up, I was back in Alex's room and I could smell pancakes. I sat up immediately looking towards the door and sniffing.

"Well what do you know, un." Deidara said from behind me on the ground and I looked over at him, "Alex was right... That would wake you up."

I tilted my head to the side, "What would?"

"The food."

"Well I like pancakes! Their second only to PopTarts in breakfast awesome-ness!" I got up to run out to devour the fluffy noms. When I got out there, everyone except Pein, Konan, and Tobi were missing - Deidara came in behind me. "Food!" I yelled and dived at the table to grab a plate and plop some food on it and got myself and drink and sat down with everyone else.

"Look who's finally awake," Hidan remarked before taking another bite of his food.

I glared at him. "Well sorry for not getting asleep until, like, 1:15!"

Hidan only rolled his eyes and went back to eating, as did everyone, minus Sasori who, of course, never eats. After we finished we all went out into the living room for more movies! Now we ended up watching Criminal Minds, though... Kisame got up in the middle of it complaining of still being hungry and wandered out into the kitchen to find something more to eat. Fifteen minutes had passed before we realized he hadn't come back.

"Where the hell is that shark-man?" Alex said as she made her way to the kitchen, but froze in the entrance with a look of shocking horror, "Ah, fuck."

I got up and went over to where she was, "What is it Al - fuck." I looked down to see Kisame on the floor completely wasted with a plate of brownie crumbs next to him.

"That was some good stuff in that fridge!" Kisame turned and told us before giggling quite oddly...

"Alex?"

"Yeah?"

"Are those what I think those are?" I pointed at the brownies. **(A/N: YAY FOR 'SPECIAL' BROWNIES NE?)**

She nodded, "I think so..."

I facepalmed, "WHY IS YOUR MOTHER STILL MAKING POT BROWNIES?"

"Well actually the real question is, why didn't she take them with her?"

"Not the point at the moment!" I sighed. "We can't have Kisame high right now!"

"Aww why not?"

I stared at her, "Ok, you drag him to the van and help him inside and keep him from doing random shit!"

"Point taken..."

Itachi came into the kitchen, "Is everything alright in here, Alex?"

"Itachi~!" Kisame got up and hugged him in a major Kisame glomp. Thankfully they didn't fall over. "Wazzup buddy?"

Itachi was visibly twitching, "Abby what happened?"

I rocked on the balls of my feet and pointed at Alex, "SHE DID IT!"

Itachi looked over at her while he was still trying to get the big shark away from him, "Alex."

Now Alex was rocking on the balls of her feet, "Um he might of had some of my mom's pot brownies?"

Itachi just stared, "Pot?"

"A drug that makes you wasted off your rocker and do insane shit like that..." I said.

"And munchy!" Alex added. I stared at her questioningly and she had shify eyes, "Not that I would know?"

Itachi just sighed, "How do you fix him? And get him off of me!"

I turned to Alex again, "I know nothing of drugs, so you help!"

"Fuck." Alex sighed, "I don't know either!"

"Then let's just let him get over it by himself and hope he isn't too addicted yet..." I turned to Itachi, "Don't let him eat any strange plants for a while, ok?"

"Wait, what about Zetsu?" Hidan came walking in and stared at Kisame and Itachi, "What the fuck is going on in here?"

"Kisame had some of my mommy's pot brownies!" Alex said cheerily.

Hidan glared at Kisame, "YOU LEFT NONE FOR ME?"

"How the hell do you know of it?" I asked.

He smirked a smug smirk, "That computer of yours is very interesting and very resourceful."

"No more looking up random drugs, Hidan." Itachi said, still trying to get Kisame off.

"Itachi-kuuuuun~ You should try some of this~ It's soooo goooood~!" Kisame hugged him more. Itachi finally gave up with calmly trying to get him off and punched him in the gut. He flew out of the kitchen into the living room and crashed into a wall, still giggling, "Itachi-kun plays rough!" Immediately everyone started to die of laughter, minus Itachi who walked over to him, more pissed, picked him up, and threw him into a bathroom.

"Let him calm down in there." Itachi said cooly.

"Well," Sasori said, "This has been a very interesting trip."

"YAY FOR FIELD TRIPS!" Alex yelled.

After we all returned home we put away our things and collapsed throughout the the living room. All except Pein, Konan, and Tobi, however.

_Why are they never present...?_

**Plotting to rule the world?**

_Now why would they do that in OUR world?_

**Maybe they think they'll never get back?**

_You know how much we want that... Wait... WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN MISSY?_

**I was hibernating again! You don't _always_ need me!**

_Of course not..._

* * *

That night I fell asleep, after watching Family Guy with Deidara in Sasori in my room on Adult Swim... When I woke up it was the middle of the day. I sat up and neither Sasori nor Deidara were in my room, no one was.

"Must have gone to get breakfast..." I muttered to myself and got out of bed only to remember that today was Monday. "Fuck!" I looked at the clock and it read noon. "Ugh, only two hours of school left!" I figured there was no point in going now, so I walked out of my room to the kitchen to get something to eat. While I was preparing my sandwich I realized something: no one was here. I looked up and around and saw that no one was over in the living room, and I couldn't even hear anyone. "What the fuck?" I muttered to myself and walked out of the kitchen, leaving the sandwich, "Hello?" I called as I walked towards the living room.

"Over here, un." Deidara's voice floated from the couch. I turned around - I hadn't seen him there before - and nearly fainted. Deidara was laying on my couch, totally shirtless, with his hair down and this very, I don't know, seductive? look on his face.

I put my hand on my dad's recliner to try and stay standing, "D-Deidara, what, where is everyone?" I stuttered, trying not to stare. **(A/N: LMAO!)**

"What do you mean?" He cooed from the couch, still with a seductive smirk.

"Th-The others, er, the Akatsuki and A-Alex!" I randomly pointed everywhere, flailing. Then, for some reason, I was walking towards him. MY FEET ARE ALIVE!

"They all went out, un." Deidara stood up as I approached him, thankfully my feet stopped before I ran him over. He ran his hand down my jaw-line, the hand mouth nibbling my face slightly.

I had to try and stay standing with nothing to hold on to so I grabbed Deidara's shoulder and tried to un-dizzy myself and focus, "Wh-Where did they go?"

Almost instantly his face was next to mine and his mouth was near my ear, "Does that really matter, un?" His lips just barely touched the skin, making me shiver slightly.

I shook my head slightly again, I had to focus or else I'd end up on the floor, "W-Wait, what time will they be - "

Deidara's hand over my mouth cut me off. "I already said, does that really matter?" Again, I was trying to not faint since his _hand_ was now over my mouth, and he seemed to know that very much considering the big evil smirk he was wearing. I grabbed his hand with mind and moved it out of the way so I didn't feel so awkward, but before I could do anything else he was resting his forehead against mine and staring right at me. His breath fanning my face made me shiver just that much more as his face moved closer and I started to shiver more. Almost to where it felt like I was having a seizure. "Abby." He said quietly, and almost...distantly? "Abby!" He said a bit louder and more urgently.

Then, "ABBY WAKE THE FUCK UP HIDAN HAS THE PEANUT BUTTER AGAIN!" Alex's voice sliced through everything and I sat bolt upright. I was in my bed again and the sun was just coming up outside from the amount of light I could see. I looked around to see Alex standing next to the bed and Deidara sitting next to me on my other side, both were staring at me. I turned to look at Alex, "We've got school today in case you forgot."

I stared for another moment before tackling her to the ground, "YOU WAKE ME UP FROM THAT AWESOMELY HOT DREAM FOR FUCKING _SCHOOL_? ARE YOU SERIOUS?" I yelled at her on the ground.

"Well if I hadn't woken you up, who would have?" Alex asked and pushed me off of her and walked out giving me a strange look, "Just get ready, ok?" I climbed back up onto my bed and sat angrily.

"Awesomely hot dream, un?" Deidara appeared next to me, "What's that supposed to mean?" He looked at me, very curious.

My eyes widened and I jumped off the bed backing away towards the door, "Um, er, heh, nothing really. Just a normal dream, heh."

"So all your dreams are awesomely hot?" Deidara asked with a knowing look. Don't tell me he knew who exactly it was about... **(A/N: Well... DUH!)**

**Who else would it be about?**

_Hush you!_

"Yeah, totally, heh heh. Well I should be getting to school now!" I went towards the door only to have it blocked by the blond ninja. I looked up at him, "What?"

"Who was in it?" Damn that smirk of his... I was right, he did know who was in it, but he just wanted to hear me say it... Damn you Deidara!

"Uhh Johnny Depp?" I tried.

Deidara raised an eye brow, "I highly doubt that, un."

"Orlando Bloom?" Well I was half right... I mean... I did reference him as Orlando a lot, ne? **(A/N: WE DON'T OWN ORLANDO BLOOM!)**

His face was right in front of mine then, "You can't lie to me you know."

I stared right back at him, "Use this for interrogating people?"

"Perhaps."

While he was slightly distracted I dropped to the floor and crawled right by in between his legs, effectively knocking him over and ran to the bathroom, "I'll give you a hint! He loves art." I slammed the door closed, missing the cocky smirk he gave himself.

* * *

This is not the only embarrassing act of stupidity that I acted on this week. Oh, no, not in the least.

Tuesday night I finally decided to use the iPod shower thingy. And whenever I listen to my favorite music alone, I just have to sing along to it. I had it on shuffle and Avril Lavigne's 'When You're Gone' came on. Immediately I thought of Deidara and his leaving.

Throughout the song it reminded me of things that I would miss if and when they left, "_And the bed where you lie is made up on your side_" I knew I'd miss having a human pillow every night... "_And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor. And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do_" They'd all probably leave the clothes that we got them here... There would be no need for them over there. I sang along to the whole thing and to my favorite part at the end of it.

"_And all I ever wanted was for you to know_  
_Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul_  
_I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah_

_When you're gone_  
_The pieces of my heart are missing you_  
_And when you're gone_  
_The face I came to know is missing too_

_And when you're gone_  
_All the words I need to hear will always get me through_  
_The day and make it ok_  
_I miss you_"

I got out of the shower and turned off the device and my iPod, dried off, and put on my PJs for the night. After I hug up my towel I went to go to the living room, but right after I opened the door I was pulled into a sudden hug. The only thing I could see was a forest of blond hair in front of me. "D-Deidara, what are you doing?" Was I dreaming again? Did I fall asleep in the shower or something? **(A/N: I'VE TOTALLY DONE THAT!)**

He was silent for a minute, "I heard you singing in there...un." He pulled me a bit closer. "You shouldn't always listen to such sad things..." I knew what he meant by that, 'Don't listen to something that'll remind you of what's going to come.'

I hugged him tighter as well, "And yet sad songs are my favorites."

We stayed like that for a while and then watched T.V in my room until I fell asleep, using him once again as a pillow.

* * *

Me: WHOOT CHAPTER DONE! You all likey? Sorry for the slowwww update... T_T... I don't have much to say here... I'm tired... Review please!

Alex: ! *SQUEAKS*


	27. Chapter 27

Suddenly had a feeling to write… While eating buttered bread! WHOOT!

Sorry people… This is the last chapter until the epilogue then this shall be over… Sad isn't it?

Oh and get some tissues! This is some sad shit… I spent about five hours of constant writing on this one chapter so be happy! And Alex says this is the best I've ever written... Heh?

_

* * *

Recap:_

_He was silent for a minute, "I heard you singing in there...un." He pulled me a bit closer. "You shouldn't always listen to such sad things..." I knew what he meant by that, 'Don't listen to something that'll remind you of what's going to come.'_

_I hugged him tighter as well, "And yet sad songs are my favorites."_

* * *

We stayed like that for a while and then watched T.V in my room until I fell asleep, using him once again as a pillow.

The rest of the week passed by rather quickly in fact and soon it was the weekend. I was in my room with Deidara and Sasori showing them the wonderful world of Heavy Metal rock type things such as Aerosmith, AC/DC, Led Zepplin, Guns and Roses and of course KISS! And also Billy Joel… What? We Didn't Start the Fire and The Downeastern Alexa were epic!

They were just staring at me when "Walk This Way" came on, and I don't think it was because of the lyrics… More of, they had no idea what was being sung. Not that I minded much… It would be awkward for them to sit here with me listening to a song about sex… As long as they didn't ask what they were saying…

"What in the hell is this?" Sasori asked as I danced to it.

"The best damn music that ever lived! WALK THIS WAY! SHE TOLD ME TO WALK THIS WAY! WALK THIS WAY! JUST GIMME A KISS!"

Deidara turned to Sasori, "I think she's lost it."

"I GAVE HER JUST A LITTLE KISS LIKE THIS!" I then did an epic air guitar.

Sasori nodded, "Indeed…"

Hidan's head popped into the room, "What about kissing Deidara?"

I fell off my bed laughing as Deidara and Hidan began wrestling each other on the floor of my room. I think it was a draw. I got up and pulled Deidara off of Hidan. "Ok stop your fighting you two!"

Deidara glared once more at Hidan but nodded nonetheless, "Fine, un."

Hidan muttered something about "Stupid little prick." Before exiting my room.

"Awwww~!" I whined when the song ended.

"ABBY!" Alex ran into my room

"Yes Alex?"

"THE COMPUTER!" She huffed, "IT'S DEAD!"

My eyes widened as we both ran into the living room to see the computer spazzing out and adds for Viagra popping up. "WHY THE FUCKING HELL IS IT ALWAYS VIAGRA?" I yelled at it and whacked it.

Alex raised an eyebrow, "Always?"

I stopped hitting the computer and looked at her, "Yeah, I get this virus sometimes… It's either this or porn… Ok so I prefer this, but still! IT COULDN'T DO A BIRTH CONTROL PILL OR SOMETHING FEMENINE?"

"What's going on out here?" Pein walked out of the hall with Konan and Tobi in tow. That's another thing that I noticed this week. Those three and sometimes Itachi weren't around a lot… But that is beside the point right now!

"The computer died again!" I couldn't get to the phone fast enough as I quickly dialed the number.

"You're calling 'him'?" Alex asked seriously.

I nodded, "Yup."

"Who?" Kakuzu asked.

"Our nerd!" Alex said happily.

"Hello?" Chris answered on the other line.

I quieted everyone, "Hey, you need to come over right now!"

"I don't think I c—"

"Is someone dying?"

"No but—"

"THEN GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!" I yelled at the phone. "My computer's fucked up again! Help it! Get over here!"

I heard him sigh and speak distantly, maybe to someone else in the room? "Fine." He finally said. "Be there in about ten minutes."

"Ok!" I said happily and hung up. "The computer is safe! Turn it off for now though."

Alex nodded and did so as I walked back to my room to continue my jam session. Once again I airguitared and head banged to "I Wanna Rock" by Twisted Sister.

"What the hell kind of music do you listen to?" Sasori asked.

I stopped and smirked at him, "This isn't my music, buddy. This is what my parents listened to!" Again, I airguitared. Head banging and all. "I WANNA ROCK! ROCK! ROCK! ROCK! I WANT TO ROCK!" Major airguitar solo! GO!

"She's actually scaring me, un…" Deidara said quietly to Sasori.

"Well how about this?" I went over and turned on Rock You Like A Hurricane by Scorpion. "A tribute to Sasori! This is a song by Scorpion!"

Sasori glared at me, "How original."

I nodded, "Now back off and let me rock!" I was getting very good at this airguitar thing! "HERE I AM! ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE! HERE I AM! ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE!"

Alex popped in, "Abby, what is with you and your oldies?"

I stopped my head banging to look up at her, "They are epic!"

She laughed, "And you look like you have sex hair…"

"Pfft." I went back to head banging twice as hard, "ROCK YOU LIKE A HURICAAAAAANEEEEE! Damn I love this music!" I dropped to my knees and laid back doing an EPICLY AWESOME airguitar move that the rockers would do on stage.

"Don't go hurting yourself." She said and left.

I got up and did some more awesome moves when Deidara put his hand on my shoulder, "I think you have a problem."

"That I rock too much?" I blew some hair out of my face. It really must look like I had sex with an actual hurricane.

"That you rock too much, un. You look like you're having a seizure."

I smirked, "Remind me to show you a whole special on heavy rock music at some point." The song ended, "I KNOW WHAT TO PLAY NEXT!" Before either of them could catch me I put on Tom Sawyer by Rush. "Fuck yeah! I may not know the words, but this music is epic!"

"You don't even know the words?" Sasori asked.

"Rock is not just about lyrics, mister! It's also about instruments, clothes, hair, and drugs!"

"What about pot?" Kisame came running in.

I couldn't help but laugh, "How about we just give you some spandex and a purple cheetah print jacket, some insanely poofy and curly hair, a voice like this, and then you'll be complete! No wait… Didn't the big stars use things like crack? But The Beatles wanted to legalize pot…"

Deidara flicked me in the head, "What are you talking about?"

I waved it off, "Oh nothing."

_Ding Doooooong!_

"YAY MY COMPUTER FIXER IS HERE!" I ran to the door quickly and flung it open, "Hey wazzup awesome computer bu—what in the fucking hell is that mother fucking ass shit doing here?" I was staring right at Chris and behind him was Mason.

"Good to see you, too." He said sarcastically.

I looked over at Chris, ignoring the ass shit, "You didn't tell me that that thing was over."

Chris shrugged and walked past me, "You never gave me the chance to ask."

Mason also pushed past me, but a lot less nicely. "Nice hair, by the way."

I stalked after them into the living room after slamming the door. "Oh, you know me, just having fun in my room with Deidara and Sasori."

"So now you're fucking them both?"

I lunged at him, "You little bitch!" I flailed about as someone grabbed me around the waist. "LEMME GO DEIDARA!"

"No way, un. If we can't kill anyone, then you can't either." He held fast to my waist.

I flailed more, trying to get a hit on the bastard in front of me, "Just one hit! Lemme at him!"

"Good job controlling your little bitch, Deidara-chan." Mason mocked.

The arms around my waist immediately disappeared and Mason was on the other side of the room with a dent in my wall, "I don't think you're in any place to talk right now, un. One of us alone could kill you."

I pumped a fist in the air, "Go shinobi! One point for sexy ninja, zero for cheating ass wipes!"

Deidara turned to me with a smirk, "Sexy, un?"

My face heated up considerably, "Well that was not supposed to come out…"

"That's what she said! Whoa there's a bastard in your wall, Abby!" Alex yelled as she walked in with Itachi.

"That is courtesy of Deidara." I turned to face her.

Alex tilted her head to the side, "Did he say something perverted?"

"What? No, why?"

"You look like a tomato." She poked my face. "Owwie… You burned me."

"Abby-chan called Deidara-senpai sexy!" Tobi chimed in from the couch.

I facepalmed and then heard the worst song ever that could come on right now, "Feel Like Making Love" by Bad company. "The universe wants to torture me via songs…"

"BWAHAHAHHAHA!" Alex fell over laughing. "THAT'S PERFECT!"

"Shut. Up. Alex." I hissed at her.

Deidara came over and pat my head, "Calm down, un."

I pouted and went over to the computer to see what Chris was doing. Not that that lasted long when "Cherry Pie" came on. I couldn't help it, I got up and began my airguitar again, just less extreme. "She's my Cherry Pie! Cool drink of water such a sweet surprise! Taste so good, make a grown man cry!"

"Did you have some pot brownies?" Kisame asked.

I turned and glared at him, "Like you're one to talk! And remind me to never let any of you see the music video for this or 'Hot For Teacher'…"

"What in the hell are you watching, woman?" Chris asked and stared at me.

I smirked, "Classic stuff that PWNS any music now a days!"

"You really are insane." Mason remarked.

I threw hate glares at him, "Yeah and?"

"Abby…" Alex came up behind me, "Don't kill anyone…"

I sighed, "Fine fine…" I walked to my room to search threw some more songs and sat down on my bed. _Why the hell does he have to be here? I mean really!_

**Karma?**

_And just what did I do wrong?_

…

_Exactly! Ugh!_ I threw myself backwards on my bed, "Fml fml fml fml…"

"What are you doing?"

I shot up and glared, "Get the fuck outta my room, ass wipe."

Mason smirked, "Nah, I'm good." Then walked to the middle of my floor and stared at me with a smug grin.

I rubbed the bridge of my nose, "What the hell do you want?"

"Nothing really, but it still amazes me…"

I didn't think I wanted to know, but I asked anyways, "What amazes you?"

"That he hasn't left you yet."

My hand making contact with his cheek was the only sound as the song ended and switched over to "Free Bird" by Lynard Skynard. "It would be best for filth like you to hold your tongue in my presence."

He rubbed his cheek, "What's with the odd speech?"

"It gets the damn point across since apparently you don't get the meaning of 'what the fuck is that mother fucking ass shit doing here'?" I turned and sat down on my bed again. "Nor does Deidara punching you across the room work very well."

"It isn't that big of a room."

"Look, either say something worth saying, or leave. I don't care if it's leaving my house or just my room, but get out of my sight!" I yelled at him.

"Aww you don't wanna see me?"

"You fucking cheated on me with a slut like Ashley! What in the world would make you think I'd ever want to see you?"

His smug smirk disappeared. "At least she wasn't obsessed with a bunch of little pixels."

My mouth fell open, "Little pixels?" I stood up AGAIN and poked him in the chest, "In case you haven't noticed, those _pixels_ are right out there ready to kick your ass to Australia if you try to do anything in here be it physical or emotional."

"You were still obsessed with a bunch of pixels that, at the time, you thought would come to life and actually love you when it was near impossible."

I whacked him in the forehead, "I wasn't that obsessed! I knew they weren't real then! But they are now, so just shut the hell up and get out of my damn room before I kick you out myself!"

He only rolled his eyes and walked out, leaving me to the sweet sounds of Bon Jovi's "Wanted Dead or Alive" only to be followed by "It's My Life" right after. Both were quite calming... Once they both finished I went back out into the living room to see Chris getting up.

"Computer all better now?" Alex jumped up and down.

He nodded, "Yup, go nuts."

"YAYZ!" She ran over and immediately went to YouTube, "OH SWEET SHANE DAWSON HERE I COME!"

I couldn't help but laugh at her even though I agreed that Shane Dawson was something to get excited about, "Not having an affair with Shane are we?" I asked as I brushed past Chris and thanked him.

"I'd never do that! Itachi's already here, Shane's in California!" She protested.

"Right, right."

"So, now what?" Chris asked.

I sighed and looked pointedly at Mason, "If some people weren't here I'd ask for you to say a bit longer, but I can't stand him being here much longer. You understand, right?"

Chris nodded, "Yeah. Well I'll see ya Monday." He waved and walked towards the door. I didn't notice until he got up, but Mason had been sitting near Deidara in a corner, who was looking rather pissed as he walked out of my house.

"If I had my clay…" Deidara still glared at the door.

"Do I even want to know?"

He shook his head, "Probably not."

I shrugged and went to watch some Shane Dawson with Alex. We watched his latest video with clips of his visit to Disney World. "WHY DIDN'T WE GO TO DISNEY WHEN HE WENT?" I yelled.

"I KNOW RIGHT? Ohh…"

"We are not taking the Akatsuki to Disney, Alex. Hell fucking no!" I put an end to her thoughts.

"Awww fine…" She pouted.

We watched and after a few minutes I burst out laughing, "Friends don't let friends drink Beverly!"

"What the hell is that anyways?" Alex asked.

"This coke that tastes like shit." I winced, "I've never had it, but my mom has… She said it was horrible, so I've never had it."

"Interesting…" Alex pondered.

"Yeah that's the place I got my big Pepsi bank thingy." I had this big Pepsi bottle piggy bank thing. I got about $800 when I first filled it up. That was supposed to go towards my college tuition… Yeah…

When the video finally ended I saw Deidara coming over from Pein and Konan with a sort of pained? look in his eyes. "Come with me."

"Ok then?" I got up and followed him to my room.

He sat us both down on my bed and he stared at the floor for a while before finally speaking, "I can't believe that little shit…"

"Tobi?" I asked.

Deidara shook his head, "No, Mason."

My eyes narrowed, "What about him?"

"He keeps going on about how I'm going to leave you…un." Deidara was still looking at the floor.

I put my hand on his and felt the ring on his finger, "But you won't… At least not for a long time, right?" He didn't look up from staring at the floor. I took my hand away from his and stared at him. "Right?"

He turned his head away from me, "Pein-sama and the others have been working with Itachi on a jutsu to get back for a while now… And they've… They've figured it out. They can get us back, un."

I thought I heard something outside of my door, but I brushed it off, "But you aren't leaving anytime soon right?" This can't be happening. He can't be leaving me, not now! He reached out and grabbed my hand, still not looking at me. "Deidara I don't know what to think until you give me a straight answer… You aren't leaving anytime soon, right?"

Finally he looked at me, but the sight scared me. Never have I seen a grown man cry right in front of me, but it seemed as if Deidara was on the verge of it… "No… It will be soon… Very soon…"

It took me forever to finally find my voice, "Wh-When…?"

He squeezed my hand tight and stared me hard in the eyes. "Tomorrow."

The only thing I could register was the word that came out of his mouth and Alex's horror-filled screech fading into another room as she ran from outside of my door.

Tears started falling from my eyes without my even noticing. "No…"

"Abby, I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you sooner, but Pein-sama wouldn't let any of us breathe a word to either you or Alexis, un." He pleaded honestly. "I wanted to so that maybe it wouldn't hurt so much but…"

He trailed off and I could only stare at him, "You can't leave me."

"I wish I could stay. You have no idea how much I do, but…" Again he trailed off.

"But what?" I urged.

"Pein-sama would never hear of that…"

"But he can't do that!" I protested. "What right does he have to—"

I was cut off as Deidara pulled me into a sudden kiss. It took me by surprise, but when I realized what was happening I started to kiss him back even though I was full out crying now. His hand wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer. Even though my eyes were squeezed shut, I could still feel the one tear coming from his eye.

When he broke away I buried my face in the crook of his neck and continued crying as Deidara held me close. I would argue more but no one can go against Pein… Madara, maybe, but I'm pretty sure Madara wanted to go back, so he was making Pein go along with it and if I were to argue with Madara, I'd end up dead for sure.

"Don't ever forget me, ok?" I mumbled into his shirt.

Deidara only hugged me tighter. "I could never do that, un. And don't worry… I'll do my best to stay alive when I get back. I won't go blowing myself up, un."

I sobbed more as we both sat there like that for the rest of the day. Sasori brought us both something small to eat, but I didn't even touch it as I sat in Deidara's lap and curled up against him, cherishing every last moment that I had with him. I wasn't going to spend all of it crying.

"This is officially the worst day of my life… It beats that Mason day by a shit load…" I mumbled.

"I didn't think I'd ever hear you say that, un…" Deidara said as he drew patterns on my back.

"That day wasn't totally bad… It had one good part…" Tears slowly flowed again but I fought them back.

"Oh? And what was that?" He looked down at me curiously.

"It was… Also the day I had my first kiss so…"

Deidara kissed my forehead, "I can see how that could be a good day then, un."

A smile made its way to my lips as I giggled a bit. "Not nearly as funny as when you all showed up at my school drunk as sailors…" I laughed some more. "The teacher was so oblivious…"

Deidara started laughing, too, "Yeah, I don't remember much other than you threatening to castrate us all if we didn't leave… And then you hit us with your dictionary when you got home…un."

"And I would have castrated you, too!" I poked him.

He smirked, "You might have regretted it later on, un."

"…Excuse me as I faint now." With that I fainted from so much blood rushing to my head.

* * *

When I opened my eyes I was laying on top of Deidara still with my face in the crook of his neck. I was about to get up and be all happy and shit, but that's when I remembered what was going to happen today… I slowly got up and rolled off of him.

"Morning, un." Deidara sat up next to me.

I hadn't realized until now the tear stains on my face… I could feel the salty water on my face as I looked over at him, "I wish it wasn't…"

Deidara frowned a bit, "I know, un… You should go and get cleaned up… We should be leaving soon. Pein-sama wants to be sure we leave before your parents return, un."

"They come back today?" I had totally forgotten… Great, my parents are going to see me at my complete worst.

He nodded, "Yes…"

"Right…" I got up and walked slowly around my room looking for clothing, not even caring when I opened a drawer and one of my bras fell out… I should really organize that thing later… After getting all my things together I went to the bathroom to take a shower. I stood there most of the time, enjoying the feel of the warm water. I was unusually cold right now.

When I got out I brushed my teeth and put on my clothes then walked out. Still, I felt cold… Freezing almost. Pein was addressing everyone when I went to the living room, "Everyone is to eat now and get their uniforms. Leave anything from this world here. When we get back we must find the area where we left. Do not draw attention to yourselves. We can use this to our advantage and mount a surprise attack to retrieve the Kyuubi. Now, go eat." With that everyone went to the kitchen, but I couldn't see Itachi or Alex anywhere.

"They're in her room…" Deidara came up to me. "Apparently they've had a rough night, too."

I looked over at the door to Alex's room. "I would think so. She hasn't prepared herself for this and hearing it from the other side of a door…" I shook my head. "Come on… You should eat…"

Deidara pulled me to the kitchen, "You need to as well, un. You can't stop eating because of this, ok?"

I tried a small smile, "Don't worry, I'm way too chicken to do anything that would cause fatal harm to my body… I'll still eat and such… I'll just be sad all the time." I made a point to say that a bit louder when I passed Tobi. I even went so far as to shoot a glare at him.

Tobi must have noticed because he launched himself from the chair and glomped me, "TOBI'S GOING TO MISS ABBY-CHAN!" Then more quietly he said, "So sorry little girlie, but I can't have anybody stay behind, especially not Itachi."

My eyes widened as Deidara pulled Tobi off of me. He knew I knew! That bastard! He was enjoying my suffering! Well the Akatsuki already has a masochist, why not a sadist?

I ate my poptarts as slowly as I possibly could and held Deidara's hand the whole time. Eventually Alex and Itachi came out of her room. Her eyes were red and puffy with tear streaks covering her cheeks. Is that how I looked this morning? No wonder Deidara had wanted me to clean up… It must have broken his heart to see me like that.

I squeezed his hand as some more tears fell down my face. It was beginning to feel normal, the water on my face.

"Damn, you both look like total hell." Hidan remarked while looking at Alex and I.

Alex didn't even seem to hear him as she sat down next to me.

I put my hand on her shoulder, "Alex? Are you all there?"

She turned to me with hollow eyes, "No… No I'm not."

I looked over to Itachi for help but he only shook his head, "I have to trust you to help her after today. I would not be able to live with myself if she hurt herself because of my leaving."

I stared back down at the table, "I can't say how much I'll be of help… But I can tell you that she won't go suicidal. She's too afraid to ever do that."

Itachi only nodded and sat down next to her.

About an hour later, it was finally time and Pein led us all out into the back yard where a circle had already been made. Pein and Tobi must have done it last night…

We all walked over towards it. One by one they each said their goodbyes to us…

Well Kisame, Sasori, Hidan, Tobi, and Konan did… Which only made me cry more when I had to say goodbye to them, even Hidan.

"I'll never be able to look at peanut butter again…" I mumbled as I let go of Hidan.

He smirked, "Well, good. I made a good lasting impression."

I nodded, "That and pot brownies…"

Hidan was going to say something when Alex's voice cut through the air, it was coarse, but loud, "WAIT! HOLD EVERYTHING!" She ran inside and came back out with a bottle of pain killers, "FEAR MY PAIN KILLERS!" She ran up to Pein and shoved them in his face, "KILL HIM SO THEY CAN STAY OH MAGICAL PAIN KILLERS!" Nothing happened and Pein seemed very peeved… "Ok then." She threw the pills aside and pulled out a bag of…bugles? "FETCH BOY!" Alex threw them across the yard… Pein didn't do anything.

"Alex this is not the time for fanfiction references…" I put my hand on her shoulder. "There's nothing you can do… I'm sorry."

Itachi came over and pulled her over to the side for a proper goodbye and Deidara did the same with me.

He reached into his cloak and pulled out a small clay cat and handed it to me I noticed the ring still on his finger, "I found some clay and molded this last night, un. I figured it could be something for you to remember me by."

I took it from him and laughed a bit, "Good choice of animal…"

He grinned back, "I know." Then he leaned down and kissed me for a second before whispering very quietly, "Abby… I love you, un."

My eyes shot open and I stared at him, about to cry again. "Deidara I…" I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into another kiss and whispered back when we pulled apart, "I-I love you, too…" I forced a smile; there was no way I was going to let his last memory of me be me crying.

He smiled back before letting go of me and walking over to the circle. I don't think I've ever felt more alone than I did at that very moment as I watched him walk away. When he got in the circle he turned around and smiled at me again. I can't believe he said that he loved me… It may be sad that he says it then leaves, but I couldn't help but be thankful that he did tell me or else I'd spend the rest of my life wondering and hating that I never told him either.

Pein formed the signs and put his hand in the middle of the circle. With a puff of smoke, they were all gone. Forever. They were gone. I could never touch him again, never see him again, and never speak with him ever again...

I broke then. I fell to my knees in the middle of the yard and began sobbing my eyes out cursing Madara's name.

Alex came over and helped me inside so I didn't make a scene in the backyard; I noticed she had a little clay figure, too, but of a crow…. We both sat in the living room totally silent save for our quiet sobs until I heard the garage door open. I couldn't let my parents see me like this, however, so I wiped away any more tears and made myself stop crying until I finally left my parents and locked myself in my room hugging the little clay bird with all my might until the next day when Alex picked me up for school.

Life was quite hollow now that they were out of our lives. Now that _he_ was out of _my_ life. I held the clay cat close to me on the way to school remembering the last words he said.

_"I love you, un."_

**(Alex/N: *screams in agony*)**

* * *

Now all that's left is the epilogue…

Review and tell me how the ending was! I think it was pretty damn good… *Hugs Deidara*

Thank you all who've read all of this! I hope you like the epilogue…


	28. Epilogue

I started working on this the day after I posted the last chapter! I must say, you all really did like the last chapter… *Sniff* So sad T_T…

Oh and… Did none of you read that there was an epilogue? I'm just saying, hope for a sequel after the epilogue is done ¬.¬

Just sayin'… Not trying to be a bitch though! It just got old when you all don't even know what's gonna happen here!

OH AND BEFORE I FORGET! THANK YOU MEGAMANFANGIRL FOR THE AWESOMELY LONG REVIEW AND… o_o Did a guy seriously review my shit?

SWEET!

On with the show/story for the last time for Kitty Kurse… *Mourns*

* * *

Three months.

It's been three months since they left. I couldn't believe it; couldn't believe that I'd actually survived three months without them, and yet I still felt like they had just left. I suppose you could say I was in a sort of mourning. They weren't dead, just gone, but is sure as hell felt like it, which prompted me to start wearing black all the time, and mostly some black Lolita dresses that I bought after selling some of my other clothing. I looked like a sad little goth girl who didn't want anything to do with anyone.

I knew what people said behind my back, rumors of why both Alex and I had a sudden change in attitude. Mostly Alex though, since she used to be the loudest and funnest girl in the whole school and now she barely said more than five words to anyone beside me, and I was even lucky to get more than ten a day…

You can imagine what that did to our social situation in school. Since we never talked to anyone anymore most of our friends drifted away, either because there was no conversation with us, or they thought we were being ass holes for ignoring them all the time and only spoke to each other while we pulled our clay figured close to us. My inner had even left me.

We hadn't named either of them, there was no need. They were only a painful reminder of what used to be, which is why we never let anyone touch them. Alex and I never even let each other touch them while we carried them around everywhere we went, which was mostly school and therapy sessions.

Yes, you heard right. Therapy. Our parents had no idea what was going on with us and since they felt so helpless they sent our asses to therapy… I had blamed my depression on my break-up with Mason, which of course was the farthest thing from my mind, even though I saw him every single day now. We had new electives this semester and he was in my art class along with Ashley Howe. I was just thankful that we were doing paintings and not working with clay during this semester…

Alex was a little more unfortunate with her excuse for sudden personality change. She had no 'legitimate reason' as the adults would put her, whereas we both knew that the excuse of, "Itachi's gone…" Sufficed enough, even though this scared her mother. She was worried her daughter was getting much too obsessed with this anime, whereas we haven't even so much as mentioned any of that series in the three months. I even took down all of my posters and put all of my Naruto things in storage. Alex did the same with her Itachi and Akatsuki things, but she would constantly wear her Itachi necklace.

My parents were quite upset over my depression as well, even if I did give a much better reason. My father was to angry at that boy for making me like this that he threatened to go to his house and shoot him himself. I told him that it wouldn't be necessary and it wouldn't help me in the least. I did want that boy to perish, but only by one act of criminal intent, but the one person that I could get to do it was gone, and if he couldn't kill him then I didn't want anyone to, though I knew that my father just wanted the best for me.

I was thankful that he never saw me at night when I would always cry myself to sleep while holding the clay cat close to me and playing my iPod. Actually, I didn't even sleep in my bed anymore. I would go in and close my door and before my parents came in to my room in the morning I would jump back into my bed, but I didn't spend more time than necessary there. It hurt too much.

Of course falling asleep listening to Avril Lavigne's "I Miss You" didn't help the heartbreak… It pained me just how accurate a song could be. Every night I would listen to this song, and never had I grown tired of it.

Even though I was depressed, never had I even thought of suicide. I'm way too chicken for that, as is Alex. The closest either of us even got to that was one week when I didn't eat more than a few bites of my dinner a day. I scared my parents a lot then, so I forced myself to at least eat all of my dinner so I wouldn't worry them too much and have them think I ate all of my lunch, which I did eat some so that the friends that stuck by Alex and I wouldn't be so afraid for us—which was only Tyler and Jimmy since they knew the real reason we were so sad. Chris knew as well, but he always sat with Mason, so I digress.

On the way to my fifth period art class I had to hold back stinging tears as I thought about the three month mark coming up. Every day has been a struggle just to get out of bed and actually do something. I made my way to the back of the class and took my seat. I had also now become the little goth girl who sits in the back of the class and didn't talk to anyone, but that was mostly because half the kids thought I was a freak and didn't want to talk to me and the other half were scared of me and didn't want to talk to me. Mason even left me alone while we were all working on our projects. I guess even jack asses like him know when to back off.

I took out a piece of gum from my bag and put it in my mouth before starting on my painting. It wasn't much, just a simple blue rose. I was just starting on one of the leaves when the teacher came over to my table.

"Abby, is that gum you have?" She asked sternly. I used to be one of her favorite students, I never did anything bad and was always quite as I worked, I still did that, but would just do things such as chewing gum. To anyone else it would seem like I didn't care for my grades or school, but in actuality I still strived to maintain B's and A's in all my classes, and was doing quite well with that.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Thomas. I'll get rid of it." I said monotonously as I got up to go throw it away.

"You know I'll have to write you up." She said sadly.

I nodded, "It's fine. I shouldn't have disobeyed the rules." I went over to the garbage, with my clay cat in my arms.

She nodded, "Alright."

I spat the gum into the trash and right as I was about to turn, and ear splitting scream tore throughout the school from the other side of the campus, and yet my ears were ringing when it ceased.

_What the hell?_ I thought _I haven't heard Alex scream like that since… Ita—_

_BOOM!_

The wall was blown away as the ear shattering sound echoed everywhere, accompanied by a few screams from some people.

When the dust from the explosion disappeared, I dropped the cat on the ground and stared at the hole in the wall, "Deidara." A few tears spilled over my eyes. He came back. Deidara had returned and had just blown a hole in my art classroom wall…

**Go hug him, baka!**

I was already half way to him by the time my inner revived. "Deidara!" I screamed as my hands touched him and pulled him into a deep kiss. His hands wrapped around my back and mine stayed around his neck, keeping him close to me until I pulled back and looked at him. It was hard since he was a big blond blob from all the tears in my eyes. "You came back."

"What made you think I wouldn't, un?" He grinned and pulled me into a hug.

I shook my head, "I don't know and I don't care. I'm just happy you're back."

"I know, un…" When he finally pulled back a bit he was laughing very much.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

Deidara pointed over to the side, "Someone got caught in the explosion, un!"

I looked over and saw that Mason had some bad burns and scratches on him from the explosion. I started laughing along with Deidara, "HA TAKE THAT YOU BASTARD! I TOLD YOU THAT YOU'D GET FUCKED UP IF YOU MESSED WITH ME!"

"Deidara, Abby," A deep raspy voice came from behind Deidara, "We need to get going before they get anyone over here because of the explosion."

I looked around Deidara and saw Sasori in his puppet and grinned happily, "Right."

When I looked back at Deidara he was smirking, "This will be entertaining, un."

I wiped some tears from my eyes, "What will?" His reply was him picking me up and jumping out of the school, but not before I flipped Mason off on the way out, and in front of us were two giant white clay birds. And who was already standing near them? Alex, Itachi, and Kisame. I waved at them and got a reply wave from Kisame, but Alex was too busy hugging Itachi's brains out to notice. "How many of you came back?" I asked as I hugged Deidara more so I wouldn't fall on my ass while he carried me.

"Just us for now." Kisame said as he got on one of the birds and helped Itachi get Alex up on it.

"For now?" I asked.

"We'll explain more when we get somewhere safer." Sasori said and hopped on the other bird. Deidara jumped us both up onto the same bird.

My eyes grew wide when they took off and I clung even more to Deidara.

"You don't like heights much, do you?" Deidara questioned.

I glared at him, "Don't make fun of me when you just came back! You have no idea what I went through these past three months!"

Deidara was now very confused apparently, "Three months? It's only been one month."

"Nuh-huh! I've been depressed and sad and empty and cold and upset and non-eaty-muchy for three months!" I held up three fingers.

Deidara pulled me closer to him, "Didn't I tell you to actually eat and not try to kill yourself while I was gone, un?"

"It's not like was starving myself, you know…" I mumbled.

"I don't care; you still shouldn't have done that, un…"

"It's over and done with." I said seriously. "You're back, and I won't be doing anything like that anymore…"

He kissed the top of my head, "I know, un."

"You are back now, right?" I panicked.

He laughed a bit, "Yes. I won't be leaving you like that ever again."

"He did nothing but mope around all day. We didn't get anything done because he wouldn't focus on the mission at hand." Sasori said.

"Well what do you expect me to do, hm?" Deidara hissed back.

"No fighting." I said. "And you!" I pointed at Sasori then clutched back onto Deidara, "I wanna hug you properly when we land! Which means no outer puppet!"

Sasori sighed, "Fine…"

Deidara bent down and whispered to me, "He may seem like he doesn't care, but you rubbed off on him, too."

"Shut it, brat." Sasori hissed at him.

"Love you, too, Sasori!" I grinned at him.

"How the hell can you be so happy so suddenly after being depressed for, as you say, three months?" Sasori questioned.

I shrugged, "I guess my body just doesn't see and need to be sad anymore."

He shook his head, "Women…"

A few minutes later we landed in the middle of nowhere and got off the huge birdie and that's when I remembered as Deidara put me down, "MY KITTY! I LEFT IT THERE!"

"Deidara can make you another one later." Sasori walked past me… Ok so it was more like waddled, but whatever!

I pouted, "But I've been through so much with that one!"

Deidara patted my head, "Why have something that will remind you of such a sad time in your life?"

"Because it could be a reminder to you to never leave me like that again!" I said and walked over to Alex, smirking to myself; I knew he wouldn't be pissed at me for saying that, but he still needed to hear the truth. I ran and glomped Kisame as he got off the bird, "KISA-NII I MISSED YOO!"

Kisame hugged me back for a moment, "Missed you, too."

"Sweet a big awesome shark dude missed me!" I yelled in triumph and turned to Alex and Itachi. "Itachi I'm gonna need a hug later after Alex is done clinging to you."

"FUCK NO!" Alex yelled.

"Alex, I want to hug the weasel too at some point." I glared.

"NEVAHZ!" She hugged him more.

I shook my head looked up at Itachi, "So what are you all doing back here? I thought Pein didn't want you all coming back."

"He didn't." Itachi began. "But when he saw the lack of effort we were putting into our missions, he decided that we should be able to see you whenever we wanted."

"Aww no sneaky forbidden love thing?" Alex whined.

Itachi smiled—HOLY FUCK WHAT THE HELL?—down at her, "No, Alex, nothing like that."

"Awww ok…" She pouted.

"Wait a second…" I turned to Deidara with a smirk as a thought occurred to me, "Was it really necessary to blow up the art room?"

"HE DID WHAT?" Alex asked. "Itachi and Kisame just walked in! Everyone was scared stiff of Kisame."

"I think I can top that. The explosion wounded that ass hole, un." Deidara grinned at his fine work.

"YAY FOR BLOWING UP MASON!" Alex cheered. "Are you all gonna turn into cats now?" I think some heads were spinning at the major subject changes…

"Thankfully not anymore." Itachi stated.

"NOOOOOZ! I MISS THE KITTEHZ!" Alex whined.

"I'm happy with that… Never do I want to have to turn Kisame human again…" I shook my head to get the memory out of my head. "Seeing all of you naked in that one bathtub was scary…"

"It was your fault for not remembering." Kisame went to his own little emo corner.

"Sorry Kisa-nii…" I said awkwardly.

"So are you all just going to stay here forever or go to your place and come back a lot?" Alex asked.

"Mostly likely we'll stay here until Pein-sama needs us. It's the perfect hiding place from the shinobi in our world, and we can easily take on anyone in this world." Sasori stated. "Most missions will only take about a week, which will be just about a month for you here if my calculations are correct."

"A month?" I asked as I hugged Deidara more when I walked over to him.

"We don't like it anymore than you do, but it's either that or we stay in our world, un." Deidara said. "Though, while we'll be gone for about a month, we'll probably stay for about two months."

"Who all are going to stay in this world?"

"My and Kisame's team, Sasori and Deidara, and Hidan and Kakuzu most of the time." Itachi stated.

"Where the hell are they all going to stay?" Important questions… Very important…

"That's simple, either outside or we'll get a place for us to stay while we're here." Itachi concluded. "We'd only need it for sleeping purposes anyways. I doubt most of us will stay there a lot." He looked pointedly at Alex and from Deidara to me.

"So you all will be hanging out with us at our houses again?" Alex jumped up and down. "SWEET!"

"I must say that I miss that little house of yours, Abby." Kisame grinned.

I grinned back, "Sweet! But…"

"But what, un?" Deidara asked.

I rubbed the back of my head awkwardly, "Well it won't be just us at my house anymore… My parents are there, remember?"

"Ohhh Deidara's gonna have to meet Abby's dad!" Alex sang with an evil little smirk. "Get out the shotgun!"

Sasori got out of his puppet and had a rather confused look on his face, "A shotgun?"

I twitched, "Alex why would we need a shotgun right now?"

She looked at me with a too innocent face. "For a shotgun wedding, of course."

"I'M NOT PREGNANT, ALEX!" I glared at her.

"What the fuck?" Kisame asked, very surprised.

I put my hand up to stop him, "No. Don't even ask. Look it up if you want to know!"

"They all still have to meet our parents if we want them to hang out with us." Alex brightened up. "TAKE THAT MOM! THEY ARE REAL! CHA!"

"Alex." Itachi put a hand on her head. "You have to calm down."

Immediately she stopped bouncing. "Ok Itachi-kun."

I stared in disbelief, "How the hell?"

He shrugged, "It's not too hard to do."

I twitched. "For you maybe…"

Itachi was cut off as Alex spoke up, "Can we go to Abby's now? I'm getting bored sitting out here in the middle of no where!"

"But…" I shuddered, "My dad's home today…"

Alex was already getting on one of the birds, "Then he'll meet his future son-in-law even sooner! NOW GET ON!"

"But—" I was lifted onto the bird before I could say anything to that…interesting…comment. I glared at Deidara. "Do you want to be shot dead?"

He smirked at me, "Don't worry, un."

"My parents aren't going to approve of you blowing up my school and taking me from it…"

"But they will be happy that you're happy now." He pointed out.

"Damn your logic." Too soon we reached my house and the garage door was open so we entered through there as Deidara flew the birds far away for them to blow up. "Mom, dad, Alex and I are home… With guests!"

My mom came out of her room with a worried look on her face, "Abby why are you home so ear—who are these people?"

I fidgeted a bit, "The Akatsuki… Well some of them at least…"

Mom's eyes went a tad wide, "From that anime you like?" She took a step away from them, "Weren't they the evil ones?"

"Yes, but mom you have to listen to me before you assume anything…" I waited a moment and my dad was walking into the living room. "Hey dad," I waved, "These are the Akatsuki… Umm… You two remember those cats that I said 'ran away'?" When my parents got home they were very suspicious as to where the cats went… I told them they ran away… Yup.

"What about them, Abby?" My dad asked.

"Well… They were really the Akatsuki and when they were doused with warm water they turned human and when hit with cold water they turned into cats. I found out right after you two left and before Alex came over and they were living with us the whole time you were gone and then right before you came home Pein had found out a way to send them back so they went back before you all came home and that's why Alex and I have been so depressed all these months because we both fell in love with one of them and we really do love the rest of them in a friendly way all except the person who made them leave who I think is a total ass hole and should die…" I sucked in a big breath. My parents only stared at us. "I promise…"

My father was the first to speak, "The only thing I caught was 'fell in love with' and 'ass hole'. When did you start cursing?"

"That's hardly the point!" My mother told him, "Are you serious, Abby?"

"I have some pretty damn good proof if you don't believe me…" I muttered.

My dad nodded, "I'd like to see this proof."

"Fuck…" I muttered quietly. "Fine. Deidara I need your hand." He gave me his hand and I walked over to them and showed them the palm. The tongue came out and waved at them. They both flipped. "Believe me?"

"What kind of things are you watching, Abby?" My mother asked as she fled to the other side of the room.

"I would still like to know what this love stuff is about." My dad tried to look all scary and serious, but after seeing Deidara's mouth he didn't look too intimidating and compared to Kisame… My dad looked like a puppy… "Well?" He prompted.

"You're looking at him…" I avoided eye contact with my dad and Deidara.

"You mean…" My dad looked at Deidara who gave a small wave. "The guy with the extra mouth?"

"Actually I have another on my other hand, too, sir, un." Deidara stated and lifted his other hand.

I knew my dad was going into protective dad mode… "You better keep those things to yourself, young man… How old are you anyways?"

"He's 17!" I said before Deidara could answer. I might have a chance if my dad didn't know Deidara was pushing 20… Holy fuck I'm in love with someone who's about five years older than me!

"Seventeen?" My mom finally came back over and stared at me.

I nodded and looked back at Alex for help but she was enjoying the show, as was Kisame. Sasori and Itachi were just talking to each other… Probably about where they'll be living now…

"Just what is it that he does in your show?" Mom asked.

"Er well he's part of the Akatsuki so…"

"He's a criminal!" Mom yelled and fled the room dramatically.

"Fuuuuuuuuuck…" I groaned. "Look dad, before you even say anything, the worst this boy has done is blow shit up. He's pretty much a pyro, ok? So calm down! It's not like he murdered anyone!" BIG ASS EXAGERATION IN PROGRESS! Don't tell my parents…

"I don't think I want you hanging out with someone like that, Abby." My dad glared at Deidara.

"Oh so you'll let me date a total ass hole like Mason who didn't care for me at all, but not Deidara who actually does care? In case you forgot, you thought Mason was perfect for me and he wasn't. Now you think Deidara isn't good for me at all. What does that say?" I stared my dad down.

"Sir, please, I would never do anything that would ever harm your daughter, un." Deidara stared at him seriously.

"Drama timeee!" Alex whispered behind me.

I turned and glared at her, "Wait until you introduce Itachi to your mom!"

"…Eff you…" She muttered.

"I still don't like it." My dad said. "I don't want you getting into what he's in, Abby."

"Can I just say one thing?" I said. "If I won't even go outside during the 4th of July, what the hell makes you think I'd want to make things blow up like he does? I'll watch it on T.V, but I wouldn't actually do that, Dad… You know that as well as I do."

My dad thought for a minute before nodding, "Have fun you two." With that he left to back out into the Florida Room, "Don't let them eat all our food!"

"That's what Alex is for!" I yelled after him.

"What the hell just happened?" Kisame asked.

I grinned at him, "I negotiated with my dad."

"You are very good, un." Deidara smirked.

"Why thank you!" I bowed. "Now for Alex's mom."

Alex went white, "Why don't we just keep that a secret from her?"

I nodded, "Ok then."

We all spent the rest of the day hanging out in my house happily as I showed Itachi a video of Sasuke on youtube. "Sasuke wants to be Edward Cullen". He found it quite funny, actually.

Later that night I went to my room to escape the chaos in my living room.

"What are you doing in here?" Deidara walked in while I was staring at my ceiling.

"Getting away from the craziness and reflecting on today… Amazing I haven't died from so much emotional upset…" I muttered.

Deidara came over and laid down next to me, grabbing my hand in his, "I'm sorry I didn't do more to stay, un."

I turned my head to look at him, "It's over and done with. Don't worry about it, just make sure that you never do it again or die while you're over there… Please…"

He turned his head, too. "I won't ever make that mistake ever again. After all, I did say I loved you didn't I?"

I went back to looking at the ceiling as my cheeks grew a tad warm, "Yes…"

His lips were right at my ear as he continued, "And you told me that you loved me, too, un."

My eyes went to the side to look at him, "Yes… I did… Because I do love you. Ever since I first realized just how awesome you were… Of course I never actually _loved_ you when you weren't real…"

Deidara's other hand reached up to turn my face to his, "And then I became a real person, un." His hand pulled me into a soft kiss while his other hand came up and ran his fingers over the skin of my neck. However, he ended the kiss just as quickly as he started it. "I'll be with you forever, un…"

I nodded, "Forever." Then kissed him again before scooting closer to him and resting my head right under his head on his chest. "My dad's going to kill us both if he sees us like this…"

I could feel him laughing and I laughed right along with him.

Forever with an S-Class Akatsuki member? And to think I first met him as a cat…

* * *

WAAAAH IT'S OVER! *Goes to sad corner and mourns*

Thank you to all of you who reviewed this thing! Though I had hoped we'd hit more that 700, I'm still amazed I've gotten this much! *Huggles all of you*

Keep an eye out for "Kitty Kurse: Teh Deleted Scenes" Or something along those lines… Idk… I'm not that clever *Shrugs*

ALSO! Watch for my new story! Idk what that'll be called, but whatever…

Now, leave a review and you can have Hidan! Or Kisame!

Both: WHY US?

Me: Because Alex will kill me if I auction up Itachi and I wantz Deidara! Unless they give me a super mega awesome review, then you can have Deidara! But Itachi… Sorry… He's not mine to give away or else I would! Sorry!

Again thank you all who have reviewed all the time and have re-read this so much! SERIOUSLY! I'm so sad that this is over T_T…

And I'm saying this RIGHT NOW:

THERE. WILL. NOT. BE. A. SEQUEL! Not unless I have spare time and can actually focus on two stories at once and have a damn idea… DON'T GIVE ME IDEAS! I hope you all will love my new story enough that it might be able to make up for Kitty Kure's leaving…

Though that won't be up for a while… I want to get a good story line going before I do anything!

Now then… Bye bye! *Hugs*

¬.¬ I'll never look at peanut butter the same way again because of this story…


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